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Red Pill TheoryMystery Man (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by [deleted]

Summary: Discussing the "mysterious" guy phenomenon, flaking, and how a woman's hamster is your best tool to getting into her.
Girls will find lots of different ways to dress up a flake. It will normally come packaged as "Sorry I can't do today I feel kinda sick and I got a test tomorrow", sometimes they've "had a death in the family", sometimes they "have lots of work to do" or "are tired from work" sometimes "their car is playing up" or "dog is ill".
Regardless, a girl who is lazy and unreliable will come up with multiple different fabrications in order to skip out on meeting you. She needs to keep up appearances and feed her cognitive dissonance that she's a good, trustworthy girl. Reliable people don't flake out on plans made with their friends or a guy, but sometimes life just gets in the way you know?
Except for these girls, life just keeps getting in the way of meeting you.

You need to start picking up on what is a flake or what isn't. Sometimes it's true, something really did come up that means she can't see you that night, but these are much rarer than you think. People, especially girls, don't have lives as exciting or varied as you imagine they do in your head. Accidents do happen, but not at the rate the average excuse-maker likes to think they do.
And if a girl has a date booked with a guy she likes, chances are that will be the highlight of her week and she's been thinking about it every day leading up to it, she's already picked out her outfit.
If a girl really wants to see you, she'll get over her dead grandma and leave that assignment undone in order to drive the 20 miles to your place. A girl who is head over heels for a guy will jump any obstacle to get the chance just to see his penis again.
I'd say 9/10 flake excuses are absolute bogus. Girls who come up with an excuse to not see you are telling you two things:
1) She is still a good girl and "reliable" and it's just not her fault she can't see you today. This is an effort to keep up appearances, have plausible deniability, and feed her female solipsism, she can’t be a bad person for flaking, it’s just out of her control! The problem is, she can't be upfront about what the real reason is which is:
2) You no longer give her the tingles enough that she can be bothered to see you. She's vetted you, assessed you and decided you aren't good enough.
Realise this now.

Girls do not flake on guys they are attracted to.
The thought of disappointing or letting down a Chad, or an Alpha guy they are really into, is mortifying for the average girl.
Their sole aim is to impress this guy enough that he chooses her to stick around with him. That he picks her over the countless other girls courting him at that moment.
Girls understand abundance mentality and understand that a top-tier guy has options. If she flakes on him, she will be replaced by the next thot who was ready and available.
Girls do not let down guys they are trying to impress. They are on their best behaviour. It’s like flaking on an important job interview, no one does it, even if their grandma died that morning.
So where does that put us?
If she flakes on you, more than once, it means you've blown it.
It means she's decided that you're the kind of guy she can skip out on because
a) She isn't attracted enough to try and impress you anymore
b) She knows you don't have any other options so you'll stick around anyway
c) She's come to a conclusion on who you are and where you stand in her own social hierarchy
Thus, she's stopped trying her best to stay in your good books. She knows that flaking is lame and that you'll probably be mad at her. She doesn't care. You aren't Chad anymore and the only guy she wants to impress is Chad.

We've all experienced the 180 flip from a girl who thought we were cool and alpha and did all they could to keep us happy, to when she realises you're none of those things and actually kind of lame and then bam suddenly it's like meeting a different woman.
There's a reason for this:
Girls project an aura of mystery around guys they know nothing about, and they assume the best.
The less a girl knows about you, the more attractive you are to her.
This is because her hamster likes to spin any unknowable facts about you into good qualities. The more she has to wonder about your life, the more she assumes you've got your shit together, have a large group of friends, are always busy, and are banging multiple other girls.
In fact we all kind of do this, by default we assume strangers are more competent or better than we are. Our own inferiority complex and insecurity makes us assume that every new person we meet is cooler or doing better in life than we are, if we see a stranger doing something "odd" (like turning up in the wrong dress code for example) we don't automatically assume they're stupid or making a mistake, we first wonder if maybe there's something we're missing and that we're the ones who are mistaken. We assume the best, rather than the worst.
Women do this too, at a much greater level. They pedestalise every hot guy into demi-gods. They get giggly and submissive and cutesy around these guys because they assume these guys are vastly superior to them.

Diminishing Returns
You'll notice this the first time you get into a new girls pants, it's nearly always the best, most animal fuck, because she sees you as absolutely above her in every way, and is trying her hardest to satisfy the superior man.
And as you fuck her more and more you'll realise that her investment and enthusiasm slowly diminishes, why is this, what’s changed?
She's got to know you better. And as she's done so, she's come to realise you are nothing like the idealised version of you that she's come up with in her head.
And the more she realises this, the less attracted she is to you. Eventually you'll figure out that she was attracted to the ideal version of you she'd hamstered into existence, and ideal that you could never accomplish.
And you'll start realising this with every girl you fuck, they expect you to be so much more than you actually are. They don't have a solid grasp of reality, they don't realise that the guys they are attracted to are just normal dudes on the inside. They see this big muscled alpha who passes all her shit tests but they never consider the fact that he farts and sometimes gets pimples and has depressed days and his friend group is actually quite small. And when they do, well the attraction fades.

Beauty in Perfection
To put it simply, they want you to be perfect, they want you to adhere to the image they have of you in their head, they want you to essentially be the man of their dreams. In a literal sense. Only the man of their dreams is enough, and when they realise you aren't him, you're nexted. You're flaked on. She flips from submissive and available to "just tolerating you".
Now we know she will never actually find "the man of her dreams" and will eventually settle on some beta shmuck once she hits the wall. This is the plight of the modern woman. Their standards are so inflated that no man can ever reach them, and this is because the standards for each woman are vastly different and vastly changing according to her own whims and “the grass is always greener” hypothesis. Have a strong bulky, masculine blue collar father for her children, lust after a millionaire, have a guy who makes lots of money, complain he doesn’t spend enough time with her and cheat with Jamal from the gas station; deep, mysterious guitar playing band member, “hasn’t grown up” and needs to “get a real job”.
Women, even those who have met a decent mate who used to live up to her standards, will always lust after more. They always want better. They are qualifiers and consumers and they will never really know what a super good deal to settle for is, they will always want the next best thing, the next rung on the ladder. They will lust after perfection until the moment they realise they have diminished bargaining power, and then they will begrudgingly settle for less than what they could have achieved before.
Let’s not also forget the media programming of women to lust after celebrities, billionaires and stoic alphas they see in the movies. Our society objectifies men into “Success Objects”, and women are attracted to the success, but they don’t really understand the true sweat and hardship needed to achieve that success, they don’t like to see how the sausage is made, and they are turned off by any sign of weakness, any slip up.

Cracks in the Armour
Show any weakness, any imperfection to a girl, and you will get a mental black mark in her head. Women treat frame-breaking, pussying out, being broke, anything “embarrassing” as mortal sins. They want the perfect man, and every slip up from the act you have to put on shatters that image of “perfect” she’s created in her head, and also pisses her off because she feels like she got swindled; she put so much effort into this guy she thought was the winning formula, only to see him lose his job or pussy out from a challenge. Women completely overvalue weak moments and focus on them much harder than any of the attractive things about you, Briffaults law comes into play.
You could be masculine, hench, charming, witty, foot the bill, sweep her off her feet, but if you trip on the doorframe as you leave the restaurant; ALL of that is shattered. The façade of perfection has been broken, and any past attraction she had to you is overshadowed by that big glaring mistake that she will use to take you down a peg.
Keep making mistakes and eventually you have a ghost or a flake. Once she realises you aren’t the perfect man of her dreams, she will move on and start testing the net guy. Women have abundance mentality and they do not waste time with guys they have already deemed imperfect. They know that if they drop quick and move on, the next guy might meet the standard.
You will never be able to meet up to the standards of your plates or girlfriend even if you are pure Alpha Bucks, this is impossible because their standards are always changing, always too high and they dehumanise men into success objects to the point that they are not allowed to have any flaws.
It’s impossible for us to have no flaws, but women, especially hot women, do not understand this. They want to find that one magical, perfect guy who has no flaws and they want that guy to swoop in, make her a princess and live happier ever after. At heart, women fantasise about these ideal situations and ideal guys, just like children; you will find few who are rational enough to understand the struggles, hardships and imperfections of the modern man (but there definitely are some).
If you want to get a general idea of what the ideal for a woman is, look no further than "Fifty Shades of Grey". Even if you're a college Chad on the football team with a string of honies following you, well, you ain't a multi-billionaire and she'll secretly judge you for that.

Combating the problem
Her goal in "getting to know you" is to find out who you really are. She is trying to build a general idea of what you are, what you do, who you know, what your frame is like, where you're placed on her rating scale, and what your imperfections are so that she has an excuse to drop you for “the next best thing*.
Her power comes from what she knows. She can only work with the information given. So there’s one easy way to win her game; control the information she has. The less she knows about you, the more she has to guess, the more she has to idealise, the more she has to pedestalise.
If she knows little about you, she won’t know your weakness. She will start filling up the gaps with her own imagination. She will start imagining you as much cooler than what you really are (she does this because her solipsism doesn’t allow her to think that she is crushing on a loser, this mysterious guy she has the hots for must be awesome).
The more information about you that you give her, the more she has to disqualify you with. The less you give her, the more she idealises you into something better, as Rollo Tomassi says (paraphrased): “A woman’s hamster is the best tool of attraction you can use”.
Keep her guessing. Always. Make her always be wondering where you are, who you’re with, what you’re doing. You could be in your basement watching anime, she doesn’t know that, she assumes you’re off at some high-profile event with girls hotter than her. You could have the most dull, monotonous job ever, but if you refuse to talk about it, she starts wondering if you’re some CIA agent or secret business billionaire. Never tell her how much you make or what you really do (unless it’s impressive), and even then hold back on the details. Don’t let her into your friendship circle, don’t let her meet your family, don’t tell her about your life story and childhood and exes. Every scrap of information you give her exposes you as the imperfect human being you are to her, and for her, that’s not enough. She will use all this as ammunition to eventually discount you.
“Oh his friends are kind of lame and he’s a Trump supporter and still not really over his ex and he seems pretty disposable and low-ranking at work…. Etc etc etc”. Do not have long conversations with her over text or even in person. You might think it makes you sound smart and you’re impressing her, but really she’s thinking “this guy talks too much and is too passionate about boring shit and he’s telling me all this, why is he wasting time with me doesn’t he have better things to do?”
The most attractive word a woman can hear coming out of your mouth is “busy”.
Your life does not revolve around her, the less she can get her claws into your personal goings on, the more interested she is in you. If you are too busy for her all the time, she will go crazy trying to get into your pants. If you only ever communicate with her to set up meets, she will blow up your phone and social media constantly, if you’re always kicking her out after fucking because you got shit to do, she will go wild trying her hardest to see you again and again and again.
The more she knows about you, the less attracted she is to you. It’s simple. Women love mysterious men. They can’t make their mind up on the guy yet, they haven’t seen his flaws and weaknesses, they overhype the strengths, and the guy seems perfect to them. The only way you can be Mr Right for a woman is to be dark and mysterious.

How do we incorporate this into game:
 When Opening a Girl
Do not divulge too much information. Do not show off. Get her to ask questions of you, don’t just spill the beans outright. Don’t linger or hang around too long, always “be in a rush”, always “have somewhere to be”. Look busy, look important. Don’t try and impress her, get her to try and impress you, remember, you are the prize. Close quickly and then leave. Don’t text her straight away, wait a day or two. Always seem “busy” and like you have a faster paced life than hers.
 Plates
Plates are disposable, treat them as such. They aren’t girlfriends and they are not there to be your emotional support, or your personal diary. Don’t rant at them, don’t talk to them about your politics or ideologies, and don’t tell them about your friends and family and work. Mention hobbies or interesting bits of information but only on a surface level. Always be too busy for them, kick them out after you’re done, ignore their texts sometimes. If they ask to meet up and you’re free, pretend you’re “too busy” anyway. Make the meetings on your terms. She needs to get this idea that you have shit going on outside of her and she’s just a side part of your life. She will be attracted to this, this is what women want to see. My go to strategy with plates is stories. If they want to know something about me I’ll tell her stories about stupid shit my friends and I got up to and it satisfies her projection hamster. “Yeah one time when we were in Rimini we ended up in this weird Italian club where everyone knew the Italian songs and dances and we felt like such outsiders” or “you think the beer here is cheap, you should see Prague, cheap way to get drunk”. If you can name drop people or places and then never talk about them again these girls think you’re incredibly interesting and have done a lot of shit.
 LTR
Dread game is your friend here, and as they say “comfort kills attraction”. You never want your LTR to get too comfortable with you or “fully understand” you. Of course she will get a lot of information out of you because she’s the closest woman to you, but you can still be dynamic. Always be cultivating new hobbies, new friends, new business idea. Never stagnate. Ignore her, sudden phone silence, busy days. Don’t let the relationship get boring, always be starting new things, new dramas, keep that engine fuelled. As soon as you settle out and stagnate, that’s when she starts to wonder. Keeping yourself busy, occupied and silent will keep her guessing. Guessing is the biggest aphrodisiac .She will think you’re at parties with super models and Saudi bankers. She’ll fuck you like she did when she was trying to impress you at the beginning of the relationship, because now she thinks she has competition and has to “win you back”. You might have just been playing games on your computer, but if you ignore her “wuu2” texts, she thinks you’re snorting coke off a models tits in a private jet.
To sum this all up in some easily digestible bullet points:
  1. If a woman flakes on you more than once or twice, she is not attracted to you. Women do not disappoint guys they are trying to impress.
  2. Women are all seeking the “perfect” guy with no weaknesses to sweep them off their feet.
  3. Women test guys and qualify them with the information they have of them.
  4. If you disappoint a woman too many times, she will next you.
  5. It doesn’t take much to disappoint a woman, they undervalue strengths and overvalue weakness.
  6. Women who don’t know much about you fill in the gaps of knowledge with idealised versions of you.
  7. The less information you give to a woman, the “more mysterious you are”, the more attracted she is.

[–]WhiskeyAndCondoms128 points129 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

This post exactly.
99% of what is "taught" on here can be summarized by saying:
"Shut the fuck up, stay busy and don't bend over backwards."

[–][deleted] 20 points20 points | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]PrankHank9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

That's my secret Tinder success, I never text them and they will think I'm busy toying with the other girls there. Eventually they will want to meet up. just kidding.

[–]MilleniumForce0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I started doing this a few months ago. She texted me not long after she left saying something about me being 'not that into her'. I was annoyed and decided to never respond to stupid shit like that. Has worked every time

[–]otterberg118 points19 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

"Shit the fuck up, stay busy and don't bend over backwards." I'm going to print that out and frame it. That's some John Wayne level shit.

[–]Endorsed ContributorWoujo1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I hate when people try to simplify things into a slogan or a sentence.

Yes, you can simplify anything into a words, but those words aren't going to help you with shit if you don't know the what, why and how.

[–]Gawernator162 points163 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

One of the best posts I've read in a while.

[–]1empatheticapathetic51 points52 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Was about to comment this. Brings me back to when I found TRP last year and couldn't for the life of me figure out what happened with my oneitis.

[–]antariusz52 points53 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

My current girlfriend, didn't flake on me, instead she invited me to 3 different funerals of her family members within a couple months of knowing her (the first not even 2 months in)

That is the difference between a girl that wants you and one that is flaking on you. She wanted me there to be her emotional rock.

[–]trpperr18 points19 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

That might make an interesting post.

[–]aequitas_12 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Your point still stands that if she makes it a point to hang out despite flaking, that is how you distinguish between legit flakes and girls who aren't into it. That is one way to distinguish.

However, your post is a bit alarming lol. I'd hard pass any funeral unless we've been dating for A WHILE. Were you not alarmed by this? Just curious.

[–]trpperr3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Who's your post directed to?

[–]theXald0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'd say buddy thought you were OP

[–]aequitas_10 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

It was meant for antariusz

[–]psirico123 78 points78 points [recovered] | Copy Link

Girls do flake on guys they're attracted to, for a lot of reasons.

Stop seeking to become this projection of "Alpha perfection" that will turn all women on simply by walking by their side. Stop thinking that exists a man that never faces rejection.

There isn't. You have to face rejection, flakes and all type of shits, whatever is your SMV. A top-SMV guy just face less of all of this, but he still faces it all.

There are a lot of real life examples on this (Hollywood celebrities that got dumped, got flaked [don't you remember James Franco "fiasco"?]).

It's simply useless and detrimental to your mental health to seek to become this perfect man.

Women are unstable. Accept it.

[–]10334264 points65 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

I used to say this on this sub a lot, let me say it again: A LOT of the guys on TRP suffer from a solipsism of their own. They simply can't understand the point of view of a girl/woman.

There is no way to control a woman, not in the current state of society at least.

If she flakes, she cheats, she dumps you, be sure, your actions are only 30% reflected in her actions, tops. The other 70%?

She is bored, she is having hormonal problems, she met a guy that looks like her dad, she hit her pinky toe on the coffee table, the list goes on and on and on... Nothing to do with you. Not the good things you do and not the bad ones either.

Bottom line: YOU CAN'T CONTROL A WOMAN, you just can't do it. If she does what she does is because SHE wants to.

The only thing left for you to do is simply the same. Worry about yourself, the only thing that you are 100% sure you can control. The best investment of your energy is thinking about what you can do for yourself. Don't get attached to anything that you can't walk away from the minute it bothers you, this goes 1000x more for girls/women.

[–]JLCitadel7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thanks. Make this a post. Many here could likely use this as a reminder. Id gild you but fuck reddit.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Every time a girl hits her pinky toe on the coffee table I just think man AWALT. Next!

[–][deleted] 18 points19 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

You are correct. The idea that you can be perfect is ridiculous. It is also serving a female imperative to try and become this all rounder or a perfect man which allegedly attracts all types of women. It is a myth, Chad gets laid but women do not even want to marry Chad. Alpha and beta is a spectrum, post like this reinforce a myth. Even back in PUA days before red pill no-one talked about being the perfect man. What is a perfect man? Someone who is a jacked male model who displays nothing but traits which vapid sluts find attractive? The post suggests you talk about Prague and Italy even if you have not been there to sound mysterious. That is some pathetic shit right there. How about forgetting bitches and actually getting on a plane. What about actually being busy with your job instead of telling a plate who wants to meet you that you are busy when you are not. This post sucks and these stupid little noobs are lapping it up. TRP is sinking into a crowd of know nothing teenagers, the lunatics are running the asylum.

[–]1empatheticapathetic9 points10 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Haha I'm pretty sure he went to Prague and Italy in these contexts. He didn't indicate lying once or saying anything outlandish.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

"If you can name drop people or places and then never talk about them again these girls think you’re incredibly interesting and have done a lot of shit."

It seems implied to me that it is made up if the girl needs to be name dropped and "made to think" maybe I am wrong

[–]Heathcliff-- 3 points3 points [recovered] | Copy Link

[deleted]
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^0.0903

What is this?

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I believe you. There are a few lies which are acceptable:

-I respect you

-you can trust me

-you are special

-no I am not just after sex

-and of course..... I love you

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Being perfect is boring, and hard to become and maintain, let alone the fact you probably can't get there without developing NPD.

My 2go is just have fucking fun. Yes, be busy and mysterious, don't give her attention..and generally what this guy said. But with IDGAF mentality, not with perfection bullshit.

[–]Lost_soul950 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

So guide us then senpaiii.. We are only trying to better ourselves. If this is the information we have, even if some of it is misinformation, its better than fapping to women pissing all over themselves or getting double fisted.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

TRP is sexual strategy. It is not a guidebook to life. You will not find all of life's answers on the sidebar. TRP will get you laid if followed properly but it can also leave you feeling shitty. There is a myth that a lot of people in here believe that if you are "alpha" enough then you live a perfect life. It is more important to focus on your mission (career or passions) than women. Everyone has a different personality, so for guidance it is best to find your own path, not subscribe to a mythical ideal.

[–]Endorsed ContributorWoujo11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Stop seeking to become this projection of "Alpha perfection" that will turn all women on simply by walking by their side.

This a million times.

First of all, it's impossible to keep the alpha demeanor at all times. Every human being cracks sometimes, and it's especially difficult given that the "alpha male" that women are attracted to is basically a comic book character that doesn't really exist.

Second, women are also attracted to tangible things: looks, money, career, personality. Just "acting" alpha isn't enough to get you over that hump.

And finally, a lot of women are just damaged and flake for reasons that have nothing to do with you. Shit, I've talked to girls that bail on relationships whenever they feel happy because they've been conditioned to know that after happiness comes pain.

[–]Endorsed Contributorvandaalen6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Girls do flake on guys they're attracted to, for a lot of reasons.

Yeah. One point that OP didn't talk about is their insecurity because they are attracted to you "too much" and they are trying to manipulate you.

I just have one who is trying to pimp my by flaking or by giving me last minute changes and giving me last minute booty calls.

She is trying to establish that she is in control about what is happening plus trying to keep me occupied. I even let her a little bit, as long as it's sexy time when we meet once a week.

I am pretty sure that she never had a guy like me before, stoic and unphased by her bullshit.

After the second time where we fucked she started giving me the "I am not that type for anonymous affairs"-speech via text, after playing the ice-princess for a couple of days, and when I said her that I haven't been able to read any signals from her, that she wanted something else I got "Well. I am usually not the one signalizing." Pretty telling.

She is always trying to stay a little bit distant, but her body speaks a different language.

In the beginning I couldn't really make sense of all the bullshit though and to be honest she triggered some cognitive dissonance in me which took some time to solve. It's also beginning to annoy me a little bit and I am actually thinking if it's time for a soft next just to keep her in check.

I also just aquired two new plates plus two prospects and they also want their time with me, so I need to be able to stick to a schedule...

[–]Hakametal0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I just got out of a 2 month "relationship" with a girl EXACTLY like this. What you are describing is literally me two months ago, so this type of girl is fresh in my mind.

What I can tell you:

  • She's highly solipsistic (I'm guessing she's a HB9/10).
  • That solipsism leads to her developing narcissistic traits.
  • She has tons of orbiters that are betas (this influences her perception of men, you however, are breaking that narrative, thus breaking her solipsism)
  • She's very insecure.

Be very, very careful of this woman. If you want to know more about my experience, feel free to pm me.

[–]XZTALVENARNZEGOMSAYT4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Agreed. OP made a solid post and striving for excellence is good but for perfection is unattainable and will consequently result in nothing but disappointment.

[–]refusewool0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

The post isn't saying you wont face rejection. It's saying be cautious of rejection and next the girl when she does it twice. Of course there are legit reasons to flake but there are exceptions to everything. Most girls will be hamstering their excuse.

[–][deleted] 20 points21 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Ive had success treating flakes like the shit tests they are. Remember, she is carefully observing how you react to being stood up.

I remember once I was sitting at a swanky hotel bar with the room key in my pocket when I got a text that she "May not be able to make it"

Texted back "K, its pretty lively here"

She immediately wrote back "You win, I'm on the way"

This interaction makes no sense to most men but here we know precisely what is going on

[–]_vend7u points points [recovered] | Copy Link

How is that a shit test? That makes no sense.

If you replied with an "Ok" would that be enough to pass the shit test?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

She wants to see how I handle her no show. Am I overly invested and dependent on her to enjoy myself

[–]BestSC8685 points86 points  (18 children) | Copy Link

While the basic knowledge of this post is thought worthy, the screaming insecurity about never measuring up and letting every girl you ever met down after revealing your real self is cringeworthy.

I wonder how many of the OPs experiences with flaking and diminishing returns is a product of his always qualifying HIMSELF endlessly to the girls.

Has this OP ever qualified the girls whom he is fucking? He really seems to come from a position of always having to measure up to his girl's opinion? That level of validation seeking would seem to lead to the things which he is trying to avoid.

[–]Heathcliff-- 26 points26 points [recovered] | Copy Link

[deleted]
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^0.7390

What is this?

[–]lastnowmyfather2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

so what DO you talk to her about when youre with a girl? you make it sound like you just give her bs the whole time and she magically latches onto you.

[–]BestSC867 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I think you delve for her interest and what she wants to spout off about...

Women LOVE, LOVE to talk and actually connect more with you by talking about themselves than you listing your awesomeness.

You job is to listen, tease and jab at her to make the interaction fun and entertaining....

[–]lastnowmyfather3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Interesting. So by making it about HER, she is in turn interested in YOU.

[–]RPFlame2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'd argue that the person who vomits up everything that happened in the last week also tries to qualify himself, he just has the false impression that by talking about all the impressive stuff he did he's winning her.

I agree with the point that you shouldn't try to impress, but you should at least have a plan when you approach instead of "that's just me making shit up as the date goes and if it happens, it happens". This is a sexual strategy sub, after all.

The one who "looks like" he's putting ZERO effort towards the outcome of a date is the natural alpha, because "Make Your Accomplishments Seem Effortless".

[–]metalhead415 points16 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

All I could think of while reading this is Wolf of Wall Street. Let's be real here, a very teeny tiny small amount of people are doing blow of sluts tits on a plane. This post reads like an insecure man who is in competition with billionaires and the high life. I'm a normal dude and I do normal dude things, women are not all looking for Chad alpha thundercock. By this posts standards no one had a fucking chance In hell to be with a woman.

The more I read this sub the more toxic I find it to be. Rp principles are great if you want to be a douchebag but to have a girlfriend and build a relationship with people, it seems like a great way to have lots of people hate you which leads to a sad lonely life.

[–]1ItsTheHomeWrecker8 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

deleted What is this?

[–]metalhead41 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lol you act like no one in the world has ever had a successful relationship. Most of the marriages in my family have lasted forever. You do you though man.

[–]BLACKxFR0STY10 points11 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

This is to a T where I have found myself I am that asshole that gets girls and doesn't keep them and is known as such. Gets old after a while

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

I was there for a long time. And I liked it. However to keep one you need to put out.

[–]accitentacle 2 points2 points [recovered] | Copy Link

I'd say you actually need to be a decent fucking human being and attune with her emotions on some sort of level that actually confronts her fears, but I won't say that (j/k, oops, I just did) because all the "alpha fucks" are going to come out of the woodwork and accuse me of swallowing the blue pill - but this is, in my mind, the difference between confidence and arrogance. Frankly, I'm a mentally and emotionally strong dude, and I'm also nice. I'm tall, I have a fairly large dick, I make fair - not awesome - pay, I'm in my 30's, I know how to dress sharp and I enjoy it. I have a beard. I get what I want, but my biggest secret is in not wanting. I'm not an asshole and I don't rush anything with a girl I actually like. Hell, part of me loves the chase and being able to turn down women who don't meet my standards so I can save myself ("hyuk what a fuckin' bp tard", hurr durr say the insensitive morons who opt for fugly one-night stands) for the awesome ones - the real ones. Most of you guys just fuck everything you can, and it's disgusting to read these stories - pathetic. Get some class, find someone actually compatible, and let the chemistry do its thing. It's way more fun and you end up with way more sex, hence the recent posts about how long-term relationships are the ultimate goal...

Meanwhile, if it doesn't work out, I don't freak out, I move on and continue to have a good life, even if I'm alone. I just fucking deal with it. Frankly, I'm usually meditating. I don't need girls, and they don't need me.

I have a strong dislike for promiscuity on either side, it's just so goddamn shallow and petty, and every girl I ever come into contact with learns this quickly from me. I have no time for such idiocy when bonding, and I make it clear - perhaps this instills fear of potential loss in her quickly, I am unsure. My honesty is matched by theirs. If it's not, they get tossed aside - quickly. I also want to make my woman happy by employing some badass sexual tricks that I personally feel happy to share. She won't forget me anytime soon... but most importantly, I am looking for connection, and so is she, or none of this shit is even real and there's no point.

A girl I am seeing right now has correctly asserted "we millenials are in trouble..." after she came to a sort of realization that what she was doing years ago (cc, of course) was not only inherently selfish, but damaging to her both literally and figuratively. She fears being her former self, especially around me, because she knows I disapprove of it - all good men always will, and this was a lesson she wasn't prepared to learn the hard way. Perhaps it's a false paradox that will unravel with time, but I will never hold my opinions from her. Ever. I don't even care if it ends in her finding some other Chad to ride, I am combining strategies of sensitivity and masculinity as I see fit and probably nobody here would necessarily agree. If it doesn't work out, it simply wasn't meant to be, and she would literally never have been happy with a single person - ever (my most bitter cynical side tells me this is surely true with all females, but I will keep trying in spite of this). In the meantime, I actually like being around her, and she has some goals that would make most city bitches blush in spite of the fact that she grew up jailed in her house in a big city herself.

My advice is not red pill, but somewhere between TRP, perhaps purple pill, and mgtow: move on, be happy with yourself, the only person you'll ever be in control of. Study Marcus Aurelius. Boys, get your hearts broken, and men, continue your path towards acceptance that we're all animals and it could easily happen over and over again in life. Be the dusty, well-traveled stranger that nobody understands - not even yourself. Keep searching - never stop searching. Someday, maybe someone will even find you. This is what happened to me. I learned how to stop hurting, and then someone found me. It may not last long, but I'm having fun again and we're teaching each other a lot in the meantime. =)

Also, I'm pretty sure luck is a factor. This chick is seriously hot as hell and sometimes I have no idea how the fuck this could've happened to me. Looking around in a concert absolutely full of girls, she is very easily in the top 5% and it makes me feel strangely proud and confident just to get that look of pure happiness from her across the room when I watch her hug some other chick or dude, like "just you wait until later"...

It could "just be my turn", sure, and I'm fine with that, but I don't really want to resort to the bullshit of seeing multiple girls at once. I have a life to live, and only so much free time to waste on women in general.

I went from a 7/10 who cheated on me, to being single a near-suicidal for months, towards recovery and becoming my true prime self again (sounds corny, but this is how it felt), to a very solid 9/10 with insane curves and a great, caring personality who actually seems more compatible with me (perhaps this is just early limerence stage stuff, idk). Of course, anything could happen at this point, and now I know to always be my best self and stay on my guard in life, doubly so with a queen bee like this...but if she strays, oh well, that's life! :3 With all the recent news, we could get fucking nuked in a year. Shit! Just live, folks. Find connection. In the words of a climate scientist from 2014 when the Siberian methane bubbles first started erupting: "Love is all that matters anymore..."

[–]ATrashMan[🍰] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

your post went from alpha to super beta real quick :\

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Agreed. Certain aspects of TRP are positive but the vast, vast majority is really really negative and is just sad bitter men ranting like the world hates them. Like this post.

[–]JackGetsIt4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

I was writing a post similar to the one above but it's now in the deep freeze. This is way more articulate then I could ever put together. I think an important observation to pull out of this is that the drop in enthusiasm women have for men they are sleeping with is the same reason LTR's and marriage is so difficult. You must keep the hamster spinning for you through 10, 20, 30 years of marriage. It's redpill on hard mode for sure.

Women truly live their lives in abundance mentality as you stated and even as their market value drops (which they always realize much later, or not at all) they only have a tempered or reduced abundance mentality. This is why they seek men with More abundance mentality. They, at all costs, need superiors.

The only counter I see to all this is maintain a level of mystery/financial/physical and mental superiority at all costs and then start dreading and putting the foot out the door if she shows signs of waning interest. Keep gaming.

I also wonder if women are partially aware of this 'mystery' need they have. I've had LTR's that tell me to do things that are mysterious or to not feed them info just yet, just so they can let their own hamster spin. These were all older women as well. The younger ones weren't self aware at all.

[–]1empatheticapathetic2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

My oneitis was a 19 yr old virgin and she kept stoping me talking about myself, I didn't get it at all.

[–]3whatsthisgarg1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I was writing a post similar to the one above but it's now in the deep freeze. This is way more articulate then I could ever put together. I think an important observation to pull out of this is that the drop in enthusiasm women have for men they are sleeping with is the same reason LTR's and marriage is so difficult. You must keep the hamster spinning for you through 10, 20, 30 years of marriage. It's redpill on hard mode for sure.

That's the truth, but it's not that hard, or if it is, you're with the wrong woman. I hope I don't sound condescending, but all you have to do is remain interesting and always find new shit to do and keep yourself fit. And wouldn't you want to do that regardless of whom you're with and how long it's been?

[–]Arlenethewhore5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Cot damn OP. As others have stated this is probably one of the best posts on here. This is why I say if a girl hasn't offered to suck my dick, let me fuck, or hasn't gone out of her way to see me. Fuck her ass then. If a girl really and truly likes you, as in sees you as possibly being her LTR/Boyfriend/future husband material she will do whatever it takes to get you. And I mean whatever it takes. Maybe even show up to your doorstep, follow you back to your parents house, watch you, wait for you, etc...... Most guys would be surprised how much effort a girl who really likes you will put in for you.

Here is an example there is a girl who was honest with me and had some decency, and told me yes she has followed me, yes she would wait for me to get to the college library, she figured out which floor I would go to just about every time and would just wait for me until she finally found the courage to talk to me. I was oblivious the whole time, and had no idea she actually liked me like that. She really has no ass, thigh, an is really just a human who is a girl. However for a girl that puts in that much effort, I would be willing to take a chance on a girl like that maybe. She was really the first girl who told me yes girls do that, and more than a few girls have probably done that for me and I just never noticed.

You are right about the information stuff as well. has why I try and remain as low key as possible. If I think someone can help me achieve what I want career wise and get me in like now, sure Ill tell them what my career aspirations are and what I do but thats about it. As far as telling girls, nah, unless they have a dad who like a general, or head of an fbi field office, or is a top notch bad motherfucker who works for that agency that can do pretty much whatever they want and can give me what I want immediately. Other than that fuck the rest of these hos. Most girls see dollar signs, and if you look halfway decent, are in school, and a decent head on your shoulders. Some girls will think about maybe starting a family with you and suckering you into getting them pregnant.

[–]smokecheck197610 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Louis L'amour... A lot of guys these days should spend some time reading some of his stories. A lot of them follow the formula of the knight errant. The lone rider enters the territory he intends to "rule". He overcomes great difficulties with the terrain and his fellow man. In the end, the woman comes to him as he has proven himself (success).

Two come to mind though I can't remember their name. In one, the hero tells the woman to prepare her wedding shawl, which she notes that she had been doing since they first met. In another, the hero stands beside the woman he saved (who is betrothed to another man) and bids her farewell, realizing as he rides away that her husband will never measure up to him, as she never saw him put on his pants to realize that he is just a man.

[–]mercuryg 14 points14 points [recovered] | Copy Link

Top notch post.

The way i see it, there are two conditions that must be met to even consider the possibility that a flake is NOT one of the 9/10 bogus ones, and actually legit.

  • Real excuse, i expect some crisis, something that absolutely cannot wait. Not because i wish a bad crisis to happen to her, but because if it's something minor i just won't buy it. If it's something minor and she just says she can't see me that day, i might as well just see it as her indefinitely postponing meeting me, which means there's not enough interest here to even make this entire interaction fun in the first place. I don't see any point in meeting a girl if she's not evidently excited to see me. (Sidenote: i'm not advocating skipping out on meeting girls just for apparent lack of interest from her, if you're new and need experience i say go on every date you have just to get out there, this is however my perspective after doing just that. In short, i'll rather have 2 plates who are clearly crazy about me, than have 5 plates with mediocre interest in me)

  • Counteroffer of both time and place, she makes a believable effort to reschedule with time and place.

If she simultaneously presents a believable crisis story, and makes a believable effort to reschedule with time and place, i will consider the possibility that this is one of the 1/10 legit cases. Both conditions must be met though, one is worthless without the other.

[–]ReligiousGroup1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

In urban terms, the act has been known as "curving"

[–]Questionnaire74 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Women, even those who have met a decent mate who used to live up to her standards, will always lust after more. They always want better. They are qualifiers and consumers and they will never really know what a super good deal to settle for is, they will always want the next best thing, the next rung on the ladder. They will lust after perfection until the moment they realise they have diminished bargaining power, and then they will begrudgingly settle for less than what they could have achieved before.

This has been written about for a long time: http://www.sparknotes.com/short-stories/winter-dreams/summary.html

[–]Short-changedChad1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I don't think Fitzgerald was far off swallowing the pill. Now I didn't know the bloke but he was clearly very observant and perceptive, especially when it came to the dynamics of relationships between men and women- but he was irreparably beta. He pedalstalised women for their beauty but felt spurned and bitter when they didn't live up to his lofty expectations- as women rarely will (until you learn not to measure them against male standards). His work explores this because it is something he grappled with during his life, mostly in his torrid marriage to a nutjob.

Gloria Gilbert in the Beautiful and Damned (title says it all) was the vacuous instagram whore of her day.

Nicole Diver in Tender is the Night was the original damaged beautiful girl that needed saving by a white knight.

Daisy Buchanan in Gatsby was a flakey alpha widow.

All of these women utterly destroyed the men who loved them, sending them into depression, alcoholism, penury and death without a care as they moved onto new men. To any one, if you didn't like his stuff before read it again through a red lens and it is fucking incredible.

It's all there; branch swinging, beta orbiting, frame breaking, pedastalisation, alphas, betas, AWALT- because in essence he wrote about life, it's just that he never had an internet forum to help him fit the jigsaw together.

Pity, it probably would have saved his life.

Edit: a word

[–]RedditAdminsSuck_882 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The less a girl knows about you, the more attractive you are to her.

This is why I deleted all my social media accounts. Women will mine your social media accounts to figure out who you are, what you do, how successful you are, and so on. While it is true that you can use social media accounts to your advantage in the short term, I think its more beneficial not to have one at all in the long run. Women go crazy when they can't figure shit out about you, and will go out of there way to try and get it, which you can once again, use to your advantage.

[–]ZosoGG 10 points10 points [recovered] | Copy Link

The problem with this mentality is you're trying to be something you're not. A true alpha knows his flaws and accepts them, tries to change them, but isn't insecure about it. You can play this game all you want but how mentally exhausting is it to always be ACTING when youre around women? If you slip up once they ditch you, for good reason. Its impossible to have true charisma as a faker. Be real and people, both women and men, respect that.

[–]1empatheticapathetic5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

It sounds nice but all he's saying essentially is hold frame. What's one of the first things you read on TRP? Mine was about how showing women certain vulnerabilities of yours is unattractive. I'd felt it before but here it was in plain English telling me so. Even if I am secure in my flaws, it doesn't mean shit to someone else, and if failure is a consistent theme due to showing this vulnerability, it makes sense to not show it when attracting a woman. OP is clearly talking from experience and he has found that maximum attraction is when you haven't shown your flaws and shortcomings, women will judge you on them and invest less because they are fickle and the grass is always greener.

There's pretending and there's omitting. OP hasn't pretended he is anything but himself and is letting her hamster build up her attraction.

[–]BlackJ12 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Wow, this sub is on a role with these high quality posts lately. Such small, yet simple advice that can get a man far in the game.

I'd also like to point out that this is one of the reasons why one should not socialize and give out their info with their female co-workers. You are just giving them ammunition to shoot at you later.

[–]DirtyProject0r1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You'll notice this the first time you get into a new girls pants, it's nearly always the best, most animal fuck, because she sees you as absolutely above her in every way, and is trying her hardest to satisfy the superior man.

And as you fuck her more and more you'll realise that her investment and enthusiasm slowly diminishes, why is this, what’s changed?

She's got to know you better. And as she's done so, she's come to realise you are nothing like the idealised version of you that she's come up with in her head.

This occured to me with the last couple of girls I have fucked. They were taking me for granted. I found the best way to deal with it is to be "busy" indeed and decrease commitment for a couple of days until she start to invest on an appropriate level again.

[–]J_the_Assassin1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

You touched up on it a bit, but I would like to add: flake on a girl. If you want to play games, read, work on a hobby or side project, do it! Do NOT say "sorry I'm playing a battlefield video game." Say "I'm researching WWI for a side project with several people" And say you're busy and have a fun night.

She'll be interested in meeting with you again. Also "I can't talk much about it" makes her interested. You would not realize how many nights I just wanted to code or read and decided to do just that.

She sees you're busy and have interest, and that to you, she might not seem a lot. She wants your time. She will buy your time.

[–]refusewool0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Say "I'm researching WWI for a side project with several people" And say you're busy and have a fun night.

Or better yet just say "I'm busy tonight"

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Makes me want to shoot myself.

[–]Jigsus3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I've never had a girl flip. They're either very interested or not interested

[–]Katavasis4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I read the whole thing and all the time i heard this weird sound in my head.

Oh yeah.It's because everything clicked.

Awesome post!

[–]b4ss_f4c31 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Fundamental flaw with this information: Sure, it may work to psychologically manipulate insecure women, but all these "tactics" reinforce the lie that you, as a man, are deficient, and therefore must create a false persona for value. The deeper one travels into this false persona, the more you will lack the peace and fulfillment that comes with radical self-acceptance. I get the frustration that comes with perceiving women as the "holder of the keys to the kingdom of sex". But what good is all the sex in the world if you feel empty inside because you have reinforced your own perceived deficiency, compelling the need to portray someone you're not to find acceptance?

[–]The Private ManZamarski4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

This is the standard "be yourself" bullshit and the hallmark of concern trolls. Tell ya what, dimwit, if "being yourself" isn't getting what you want in life - and it's not just sex - then perhaps your persona sucks and you need to make some changes.

[–]b4ss_f4c30 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I agree. Change and self-improvement should be a constant in life. Setting goals and evolving our physical emotional cognitive spiritual and financial health is hallmarks of a great man. Im referring to fraudulence and the use of this fraudulence to deceive and manipulate others. Also, a lessoned i learned in life is, if i get angry at something some tells me about myself, my reaction is a testament to the validity in some degree to their statement.

[–]V-Firefly1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Or actually become involved with your own self-development, read and educate yourself, become busy with real work, and as a result naturally become more attractive to women.

Do not strive to become more attractive to women - strive to become a greater man, with cool side effects.

I do not want to devalue the informative component of the opening text, and all the effort put into making it, which is not insignificant, but it is time to look where the real value of a man lies - are we going to follow pick-up artist's philosophy "act busy and make her think you are more then you really are", or are we going to actually become more then we really are, by working on ourselves, and attract women as we should.

[–]NiceTryDisaster0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Saved. One of the best posts I've read in a long while.

[–]uniquevoid0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Point 1. and 2. are quite debatable

A woman can flake on you even if she's attracted. Example: tingles overload and not enough comfort. She will shit her pants just by thinking something sexual will happen

Women don't want you to be perfect, they want you to be a man. The only mistakes they don't tolerate are beta mistakes

[–]LOST_TALE0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

ah how interesting. You're claiming girls also idealize (mistake ideal for reality).

[–]ep19390 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Girls do not flake on guys they are attracted to.

Do you guys live in a world where you meet only 20 yo college girls?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

How do you go about taking a girl on a date, without revealing too much about yourself? Surely during conversation there are going to be questions about each other. Do I just deflect with vague or sarcastic answers? I can see that working for a while but, surely, it'd eventually get kind of lame and uninteresting? I know if I repeatedly tried to learn about a girl and she continually rejected my questions, I'd lose interest.

[–]Luckyluke230 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

it's a good poist, but i feel like after reading this i should unsub from redpill and sub to MGTOW. /s

but seriously, I don't get much now as it is i feel as if what you are talking about is out of reach. i mean sure, i get it. BE BUSY. but it feels like i'm buying into her game and playing it. i don't want to play games i just wanna do me and have her come a long for the ride.

can someone help me understand

[–]dicers0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

You actually are correct. If you have to manipulate (like OP or a pua) to get and keep a girl, you are doing it wrong. You lie/are fake to her, but moreover you lie/are fake to yourself.

Just focus on being the best YOU you can be. Girls will follow if you are open to that.

Remember, a true MGTOW does not hate/repulse/shun women, a mghow just sees a woman for what she is and chooses how he will interact with her, may it be to avoid, date, ons, ltr, or whatever. He just looks out for nr1 first and have her along for the ride for as long as it lasts, or chooses to limit the degree of interaction.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Good work man, just what we needed around here.

[–]meh6130 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I met this accounting student a few months ago. Gone out with her 3 times, she's picked me up from parents' home twice -- I live about an hour's flight away from her.

Every time I ask her out, she says she's busy, whines she can't make it, how much she wants to see me, etc. and then, she'll show anyway. What the hell is going on with her?

[–]Locogooner0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

While I agree with the post and this the core is definitely true...attractive girls fuck and continue to fuck non-perfect, non-mysterious guys all the time.

May be for a relationship this rings true, but if it's just casual sex then helllll no.

[–]XZTALVENARNZEGOMSAYT0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Incredible post brother. I have noticed all of this to be true.

Also I'd like to add: If you guys talk on the phone, hang up first most of the time. You have to go, not her.

[–]I_dontevenlift0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Im at a struggle here with TRP;

  1. Posts like this make it seem like discredit some of what is said around here. For example, the more mysterious you are, the more a girl willbe attracted to you. Yes thats true, but in a LTR, mysterious does not equal love. All my LTR have been open and great, and communication was a big part.

  2. I came here for good advice, and got some good ones. Dread game, keeping options open, and working on yourself while not putting pussy on a pedastal are great and helped me with women a lot.

But then again, I just pick and choose what I feel works for me, thats my take on the red pill

[–]satanicpriest130 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

This post described my Tinder cheat sheet. Keep it mysterious, dispense less information, and by no means introduce them to your friends or colleagues. this is especially useful when you're going through a new Tinder date every other week and not calling them again. You don't want them tracking you down and causing a scene at your workplace. OPs other points are all better suited to Tinder, where it is very easy to pull off this mysterious persona. Go light on what you do, how much you make, and your history. Even when the topic of politics and business comes up I don't make it overtly obvious who I support. I always give a vague reason to keep them guessing.

[–]RPFlame0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

sometimes they've "had a death in the family"

Man, I'll never forget a girl that flaked by telling me his father got hospitalized. You cannot get more brutal than exploiting something bad that happened to a relative as something useful to you (an excuse to avoid someone).

Not in the "my dad got in the hospital, so we have to cancel our date" but "my dad got in the hospital, so we have to break up". All of my fucking why!

Women do this too, at a much greater level. They pedestalise every hot guy into demi-gods. They get giggly and submissive and cutesy around these guys because they assume these guys are vastly superior to them.

Also known as the Halo effect.

[–]fakeplastictrees870 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

what about if you are in ltr, and living together? how to keep the things dynamic, especially Friday, Saturday, Sunday? I am going to the gym, training mauy thai, but ican see the loos of attaction towards me since we moved in, but main reason i am doing(moved in with her) this is because yes, i want family. and i know all women are w, but i want family and i am ready for consequences (no marriage though), but i want to prolong her attractiveness as long as possible.

[–]askmrcia0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

It gets harder and I never lived with a girl, so it's hard for me to say. I have however been staying over a girl's house more than my own in one of my relationships due to my shit housing situation (my house burned to the ground).

When that happened we were together alot and I could feel her losing attraction to me because she started seeing my flaws. For instance, she always thought I was busy.

Well there plenty of times when I would sit at home and study for grad school classes or just watch Netflix. That made me seem boring, but she could not grasp the concept that I can't do some exciting adventure everyday.

She on the other hand felt that she could do something crazy every day. Also believe me, like you being in muay thia, I did flag football, kickball, coached a women's flag football team, all during the week. So even though I was still technically busy, she would see me home at times doing boring things and that caused her to lose attraction.

I'm sure if we lived together, I would have to go to my school library just to watch Netflix just so she could believe I was doing something instead of being home in my free time.

Obviously we are not together. Now keep in mind that this is not always the case. I just happened to be with a party girl so it kinda was my fault. If your girl is the type to go drinking at bars 5 days of the week then I say you better make yourself seem busy and popular everytime you're around her.

[–]fakeplastictrees870 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

She is not party girl, she is introvert, although she doesn't mind to hang out with friends. She was quite active in party scene in the past based on her Facebook pictures and while she was intern, when I was not with her, she used to go out with coworkers. Now she doesn't go anywhere because I set boundary of no hanging out with them without me(her only friends are guys - but that's another story).

[–]clint_bronson0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

a mystery man thread would not be complete without this video

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qZowK0NAvig

[–]MrAnderzon0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Very good information. Saved. Could we also make stuff up to distract her from asking about us

[–]PedophilePriest0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm not saying your wrong here, because I don't think you are, I agree with most of your analysis.

I do however have an issue with the mindset this approach entails. Of course she's not going to continue looking up to you if your constantly qualifying yourself to her.

I tend to keep my plates at a distance, but not to appear mysterious, but because they have to constantly qualify themselves to me. If I get sick, I don't hide it, I use it as an opportunity to have a plate make some homemade chicken noodle, bring it over, blow me and leave.

If a girl flakes on you before you've flaked on her, your doing it wrong.

[–]zephyrprime0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Girls do not flake on guys they are attracted to. I really disagree with this. I've seen high value guys get flaked on during the early stages by a girl who they ultimately married. The thing you gotta understand about girls is they are phoney as heck and flakey is just one more way to play the game and test a guy.

[–]Aazaad0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

This deserves to be in the side bar.

[–]GodandMyself0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

THIS. POST. Man, if I only I knew these things literally 8 months ago...oh well. Still forcing that pill down. I'll definitely know for the next ones...plural intended.

[–]DopamineKid0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Great post. Thank you. Women deluded creatures they are.

[–]GeorgeBushIV0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

thanks. solid post.

sums up why ive failed in the past

[–]IGoYouStayTwoAutumns0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Great post, however, oddly, lot of comments here seemingly from diehard Blue Pillers, White Knights, women etc.

Anyone else noticed this trend in the Red Pill sub over the past few weeks? Has the mainstream feminist imperative finally found our happy little home?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Tripping while exiting a doorway is not going to kill all attraction a woman has for you.. That's just insane.

Sure a woman who's not that into you may flake for stupid reasons, but she's going to flake on guys she's super attracted to sometimes as well. Sometimes I flake on chicks when I don't feel like going out or spending money at a bar. Shit happens. Overanalyzing flakes is pointless. If it gets to the point where you feel annoyed or like she doesn't value the time you make available for her, just next the chick. Don't beat yourself up over it.

I find posts like this are detrimental to people on the path of self improvement here at TRP. When people read this stuff it gets to their head and fucks up their game. They overanalyze every fucking thing to make sure she still sees them as "alpha".

I say, what's the point? If dating really gets this serious and isn't that fun anymore it's just miserable and makes you feel like shit about yourself. And if a chick was really that extreme in her judgements, why even date her? Fuck that noise, I'd rather bang hookers or a girl a few levels lower on the HB scale.. Or better yet, a girl who's simply a bit more chill and not as much of an uptight bitch.

I've literally broken every rule that exists when it comes to "being alpha" and have still F-closed girls. When I lost my V-card after my first date with this girl from my college class when I was 22, I literally told her "I think all women are evil and manipulative". She still fucked me anyway. I've gotten emotional on girls and talked about my troubled childhood, still got laid. I've whined about exes, still got laid.

Most of this shit is in your head. You can never 100% pinpoint with accuracy why a woman flakes on you. Just be your confident self, give it time, and if you get fed up with her shit.. Simply just move on and forget her. No sense in beating yourself up over it, especially if you're a cool dude with a life who's moving in the right direction.

[–]3whatsthisgarg0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I find posts like this are detrimental to people on the path of self improvement here at TRP. When people read this stuff it gets to their head and fucks up their game. They overanalyze every fucking thing to make sure she still sees them as "alpha".

I say, what's the point? If dating really gets this serious and isn't that fun anymore it's just miserable and makes you feel like shit about yourself.

I totally agree with everything you said in this comment, but it's lost and buried way down here. Make an original post with this message. There is just way too much over-thinking going on. All this Is this alpha? or Is this a shit test? No, you're just a slob, or, she's just a bitch. You don't need a list of tactics to fix the first one, and for the second, you just need to find a different woman.

[–][deleted] 0 points0 points | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]3whatsthisgarg5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

who project their relationship problems on anyone and anything but themselves.

Such a exemplary way to misunderstand the basic idea behind TRP. The first thing a man needs to understand is it's his own fault. Then he needs to improve himself. Nobody is trying to make women change here, dumbshit.

[–]MEpicLevelCheater[M] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

You're out of here, faggot.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

As I always tell people, "if she wants to, she'll find a way. If she doesn't, she'll find an excuse" but don't let it get to your head either way because they always change their minds and are all pretty much insane. So fuck it just go for it and be ready to drop.

Oh and if you want a girl to lose interest, start telling her about yourself- your hobbies, goals, ideas. Tell her how great you are. Maybe this generates a lack of attraction because they feel you are wanting validation, putting you below her, or maybe it's because it takes away the mystery, but I've found it's a great way of short-circuiting a girl's attraction and getting her to leave you alone. Doing things to try to get her to leave you alone will only make her want you more. It's reverse psychology. And if you can find a way to actual not be interested in her, she will like you more which is the catch because by that time you won't really want her.

[–]ShakaLeonidas-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

TRUTH!!!

I had a girl(23 yo HB8) i hadnt talked to since high school(9 year time lapse) fly from NYC all the way to FL on her dime to get buttfucked, creampied, bdsm demolished after a couple conversations via messenger and phone.. She was my Wendy from Wonder Years. I chased her all through HS(i was a senior she was a freshman) and out the blue we reconnect. In 2weeks she was deepthroating my phallus while i burned her with candles that SHE bought. Low and behold she had a BF in NYC and told him she was visiting fam because their relationship was "rocky". SMH fucking hamster. Stayed for a week and cooked me breakfast butt naked everyday.

Also a married lady i banged(HB7 latina milf) for 5 years, decided to drive 10 hrs one night(leaving hubby wit da kids) just to get knocked off and reconcile over the last time we saw each other. Reconciling because i told her we couldn't have a kid because i was engaged (to a whore) and she had to hit the clinic then left her in Walmart parking lot at 1am.

If a girl flakes, She isn't in to YOU like that. If she knows too much about you the passion dies. If you are always available be prepared to become the "Welcome Home" doormat.

Yeah things come up BUT they will move heaven and earth to meet you OR they will reschedule ASAP for the soonest abailable meet up. They will throw the vagina at you in recompense as soon as they can as well.

[–]WolfofAnarchy-2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm sorry, but this screams ACT THIS WAY AND THEY WILL APPROVE YOU.

The post is good, but the underlying message screams beta, neediness and insecurity.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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