How To Turn A Girl On (By Talking About Sex)

The topics we bring up in conversation cause us to feel corresponding emotions: Talking about the next Marvel movie is going to bring up one set of emotions, while talking about genocide will bring up another.

Generally, it’s best to focus on topics that elicit strong emotions when you’re interacting with a girl you like. And, naturally, of all the emotions you could hone in on, one is more useful than all the others – sexual desire.

If you want to make a girl feel aroused, the best topic to focus on in, of course, sex. Get sex on a girlâs mind, and she will experience a natural build up of desire for you.

However, talking about sex is dangerous: do it poorly, and a girl will quickly reject you. Yet, the danger is what makes this topic so powerful. If you can talk about sex and get away with it, youâve done something few men would have the balls – or the tact – to pull off, and youâve instantly made yourself stand out from almost every other guy.

Sex is a taboo topic, bringing it up can be highly offensive. Because of this, the best way to bring up sex is under the guise of humor or fun.

Itâs unlikely a girl will be offended if you bring up sex within the context of a joke, yet, youâll still have a strong impact on her emotions. Hereâs a few examples of this principal taken from interviews with actor Russel Brand:

Example 1:

Russel: When you laugh like that it makes me know what you sound like when you come.

Girl: (Laughs so hard she canât breathe.)

Russel: And I like it!

Girl: Do you? Umâ¦. Uh⦠youâve thrown me, but I love it. I love that youâre throwing me.

Russel: If youâre ever so confused pop yourself down on my knee and see if we canât get you pregnant.

Girl: (More uncontrollable laughter.)

Example 2:

Russel: How come youâve turned up here dressed in this fashion? (Sheâs wearing a dress that reveals a lot of cleavage.)

Girl: Itâs hot, I donât know if youâve noticed?

Russel: I havenât, no. Iâve dressed elegantly, like an English knight.

Girl: Well, I prefer to dress like a hooker.

Russel: If you dress like a hooker, people will treat you like a hooker, and I havenât got any money on me.

Girl: Fuck!

Russel: Thereâs nothing I wouldnât do to you. You strike me as an adventure playground for my cock.

Girl: (Bursts out in laughter.)

Russel: You, young lady are the reason I went through puberty, for women like you.

Girl: Aww, thanks, thatâs the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.

Russel brand is being extremely sexual, yet itâs done within the subtext of humor. Heâs not being serious, heâs being playful. Men often treat sex as a conquest, as something they have to earn. But for women, sex isnât a goal that needs to be achieved, itâs about self-expression and raw passion.

Russel Brand is able to get away with saying things that would cause most celebrities to lose their job because he brings up sex not in a humorous, non-aggressive way.

Donât expect to be as clever as Russel Brand with sexual innuendo, heâs a famous comedian. However, you can use his examples as inspiration.

How To Create Your Own Sexual Innuendo

The lines Russel Brand said in the above examples werenât memorized, he thought of them spontaneously. You can learn to come up with your own witty sexual comments on the fly by practicing the following exercise.

Exercise: Sex With Me Is Likeâ¦

This is a word-association game in which your goal is to complete the phrase âSex with me is likeâ¦â with something clever, interesting, or absurd.

To start, you choose a subject, this could be anything:

A mouse, a tornado, a roller-coaster, a brownie, a cup of coffee, etc.

Once youâve selected a topic, try to complete the sentence. For example:

âSex with me is like a roller-coaster, it will make you throw up and it only lasts about 5 minutes.â

Once youâve come up with something, change to another topic. You can come up with something off the top of your head, or you can even look around you for examples.

Hereâs an example of what playing this game might look like:

âSex with me is like reading a book, you only do it because you have to, and youâll fall asleep before youâve finished.â

âSex with me is like an iPhone, itâs over-hyped and it doesnât last as long as youâd hope.â

âSex with me is like a trashcan, it smells like old cheese and you forget about it after youâre done with it.â

Practice this exercise for a couple weeks and you will develop an intuitive ability to think of witty sexual innuendo off the top of your head: youâre training your mind to associate everyday objects with something sexual, but in a playful way.

There are also several conversational games you can play that allow you to make your interactions sexual without taking much of a social risk.

Would You Rather

To play this game, you simply ask a girl to choose between two hypothetical situations. Hereâs a few examples:

• Would you rather date a man who fulfilled all your wildest sexual fantasies, but he lives with his mom, and is a complete failure in his business life, or would you prefer a man who is rich and successful, but he is a complete dud in bed and will never give you an orgasm.
• Would you rather go the rest of your life without TV or the rest of your life without sex?
• Would you rather be a nymphomaniac or have absolutely no sex drive?
• Would you rather have a disease that caused you to have an orgasm whenever a man touched you, or a disease that made it so you could never have an orgasm?

Playing would you rather gives you an excuse to make your conversation sexual, the game wouldnât be fun if the questions werenât absurd and controversial – youâre being sexual in the name of playfulness, not perversion.

Fuck, Marry, Kill

To play this game, choose 3 people and ask the girl which one she would fuck, which she would marry, and which she would kill.

You can play this game using famous people or with people in the area. If you use guys in the area, itâs best to choose the most dopey looking men possible (implying that you donât think she could do any better).

When she answers the question, you have a great opportunity to tease her. Hereâs an example:

You: Who are your favorite male comedians?

Her: Aziz Ansari, Louise C.K. and Bill Burr.

You: Okay, letâs say youâre in a room with them, who would you marry, who would you fuck, and who would you kill?

Her: Oh gosh, I guess I would marry Aziz, I would fuck Bill Burr, and I would kill Louise C.K..

You: Why donât you like Louis C.K.? You donât fantasize about an overweight bald man randomly asking you to masturbate for him? That doesnât get you going?

Overall, fuck, marry, kill is a very simple way to make a conversation sexual without doing anything offensive or potentially creepy.

The Question Game

This game is a simple, yet effective excuse to talk about highly personal topics (including sex). To play the game, simply say:

You: Hey, have you ever heard of the question game?
Girl: No, whatâs that?
You: Thereâs three rules. First, we take turns asking each other questions. Second, we canât ask the same question twice. And third, you can pass on a question if you donât want to answer it.
Girl: Okay.
You: The main point is to ask questions that dig deeper than the normal surface level stuff, I can start if you like.
Girl: Alright.

Once you start playing the game, ask questions that are increasingly personal and sexual over time. You donât want to start with something too risque, build up to it slowly.

For example, some of the earlier questions you might ask include:

âHow much time per day would you say you spend watching Netflix?â
âWhat was your first kiss like?â
âHave you ever used Tinder?â
âWhatâs the longest relationship youâve ever been in?â
âHave you ever kissed a girl?â
âHave you read 50 Shades of Grey? And if you did, how much did you like it?â

Not every question you ask should be sexual, that would come across as forced. Intersperse questions about things that you genuinely want to know about the girl.

For instance, asking a girl whether or not sheâs religious can be helpful for determining compatibility (if sheâs a devout Mormon, you know itâs not likely youâre going to have a one-night stand with her).

Make sure to gauge the girlâs responses. If you ask sexual questions but she doesnât seem to like answering them, you might want to stick with less taboo topics (because sheâs not comfortable talking about sex with you yet).

As you play the game, you can gradually ramp up the questions to become increasingly personal (so long as sheâs responding well). For example, later in the game you might ask:

Have you ever had a one-night-stand?
Do you think men or women are hornier? (If she says men, you could argue that women try to hide their horniness, but secretly theyâre much more depraved than men – just look at romance novels like 50 Shades of Grey.)
What are some things that turn you on? (Good information to have at your disposal).
Whatâs the most interesting place youâve had sex?
Have you ever had a threesome?
If you could have sex with any actor, who would you choose and why?

The question game is a useful tool for learning how to turn a girl on. If you can comfortably talk about sex with a girl, she will feel at ease with her sexual nature around you.

Wrapping Up How To Turn A Girl On (By Talking About Sex)

You just learned a litany of techniques you can use to create sexual tension with your words. Understand, although the words you use do matter, sexual attraction is sparked non-verbally. You can say all the right things, but if your eye contact is shifty and your voice sounds timid, women arenât going to feel an increasing sexual tension.

Think of it this way, attraction is sparked through what you do; that spark is turned in to a flame through what you say.

If women arenât responding to you in a sexual way, focus on improving your nonverbal communication first (you can find exercises for this in my free eBook, The Five Triggers For Sexual Attraction). Once you’ve learned how to turn a girl on consistently, then you can learn to increase that desire further through verbal techniques.