Being Compliant on Dates vs. in a Relationship

When To Be Compliant

As I talk about in great detail in my primary dating manual, Get To Sex Fast, women are extremely picky and have their highest levels of ASD and buyerâs remorse before you have sex with them two times. Once you have sex with her two times on two separate occasions, her ASD and pickiness for you drops about 80-90%, and she will now tolerate all kinds of behaviors from you she would never tolerate before you had sex with her twice. Itâs a hard-coded biological aspect of women, at least thatâs my theory. (Yes, there are always unusual exceptions to every rule, so there can be odd times a woman has sex with you two or three times and then ghosts you, but these situations are rare, and usually indicative of you doing something very wrong.)

Pink Firefly recently listened to a radio show where they were interviewing a woman who ghosted a guy after the first date. During this date, they went back to his place, had sex (which is good), and then spent the night together (which is very bad; never spend the night with a woman the first time you have sex with her; this sends the entirely wrong EFA).

The reason she ghosted him the next morning after she left, and stopped returning his texts? He had bad gas “all night” while he slept.

If you ask most womenâs opinion on this, they would probably agree with her. âEw, yeah, thatâs gross. I donât want to date a guy who farts all the time!â

However, imagine if this guy had not spent the night with her, had sex with her four or five more times, and then they spent the night together where he farted in his sleep a lot. Would she care?

Nope. Sure, she might tease him about it the next morning, or even complain about it, but she wouldnât stop seeing him. Oh no. Sheâs locked in now. She isnât going anywhere regardless of his noisy, nocturnal butthole, at least for a while.

I even told this to Pink Firefly as she relayed the story. âYeah,â I said, âThat would gross you out the first time you had sex with him, but if you had fucked him four more times and then he farted, you wouldnât care at all.â She didnât disagree because she knows how women work as well as I do.

This means that if you are compliant on something like picking her up for the first date when she has no car, yes, itâs a slightly beta move and not very attractive. The problem is if you go all Alpha and refuse to pick her up, it may piss her off or turn her off to the point where she just blows you off and goes to the next guy on her list (and all women have a list whether they know it or not) when she would have had sex with you anyway.

So the correct move is to cheerfully agree to pick her up and drop her off for the first date, if she really needs it, while keeping all the usual 85/15 player/provider frames. Then get to sex with her twice as fast as you possibly can. Then, at that point, once Lock-In has been achieved and you have moved from seduction mode into relationship management mode, you can tell her that transportation to and from your place is her problem, and that she needs to figure that out.

Have Standards!

This does not mean you do everything a woman wants pre-Lock-In and kiss her ass. Oh, no no no. Thatâs beta shit. As always, you need to set a few hard standards for your behaviors and logistics that you wonât cross no matter how hot she is or what she demands. I have many of them, but Iâll give you two simple examples.

The most obvious one is how much money Iâll spend on a woman pre-Lock-In. If some girl demands, not asks for, but demands a full-on dinner date for the first date, before weâve ever had sex, then with all due respect, she can go to hell. I donât care how hot she is or how smart she is or any other aspect. Iâm going to politely tell her Iâm not the man sheâs looking for and then move on. As Iâve said perhaps thousands of times over the years, spending money on women pre-sex is insane, something only desperate beta males do (or Alpha Male 1.0âs with oneitis). After weâve had sex and I know the odds are good sheâs going to actually stick around for a while, the spending money on her is fine if sheâs at the MLTR level. But before that? Fuck no.

Another standard I have, one Iâve talked about a few times before, is that Iâm happy to date any woman who lives within 50 minutes driving distance of my house. Beyond 50 minutes, no. I know there are lots of guys who date women who live an hour, two hours, even three hours away, and I think these men are insane. Donât you have anything better to do with your time? Are you telling me there arenât any other women as cute as her who live closer? Scarcity mindset. But I digress.

Within the 50 minute radius, pre-Lock-In, Iâm very nice. If a woman needs me to go pick her up and drop her off, no problem sweetheart. Just give me your address and Iâll be there. But if she lives longer than 50 minutes away, sorry darling, youâre too far, and since I donât do one night stands, I have no interest in carrying on a long-term nonmonogamous relationship with a woman who lives that far away.

Once a woman who lives within 50 minutes of my house has sex with me twice, now sheâs locked in. When she wants to come over for the third time for sex, Iâm going to tell her that she needs to figure out transportation on her own, at least to some degree, even if itâs just one way.

Maybe she needs to get a ride from one of her friend zone beta male orbiters to my house, and then Iâll drop her off afterwards. Pre-Lock-In, this demand would cause her to ghost me and never see me again, but now that sheâs had sex with me twice, sheâs more than happy to comply. Again, she might bitch and moan about it for a minute, but sheâll still do it. Iâve done this with women bazillions of times over the last 11 years and never had a problem.

This doesnât apply to just transportation logistics. It can apply to all kinds of minor requests women make during the first and second date process. As long as you adhere to your standards and have a strong, Alpha 2.0 EFA, be nice about the logistics during this phase, then Alpha-up after Lock-In for proper relationship management.