Finn Has Feelings, and visibly so. But instead of overcompensating for that supposed “weakness,” getting defensive, or shutting off from other people like a Broody Male Hero might, he quickly and easily bonds with Poe, and later with Rey. Recognizing Rey’s abilities and strengths, he accepts her completely as an equal and peer*, and instead of feeling threatened and attempting to control her or one-up himself against her, he genuinely compliments her skill. They gush at each other, actually–it’s suuuper cute and mutually affirming.Clearly winning is not the priority. And that is why Gammas and male feminists always lose. When you'd rather have female approval of your actions than actually accomplish your goals, failure is guaranteed.
Finn doesn’t balk at helping out, whether it’s passing tools to Rey in the Falcon or aiding Chewie with his injuries. Finn doesn’t talk over Rey or try to make choices for her. They may disagree and banter, but it’s not barbed, and it’s at an even keel. He looks out for himself, but not at the expense of others – when Finn decides to leave for the Outer Rim, he honestly tells Rey his story and how he feels about her, and asks her to come, and then accepts her refusal gracefully. He respects her decisions, her autonomy, and Rey as a person.
Obviously Finn digs this girl — who wouldn’t, she is undeniably The Coolest — and he does ask if she has a boyfriend early on, but after she says “None of your business,” he lets it go. When he could sulk or tease or be possessive or rude toward her, he doesn’t. He adores her, but is happy just to see Rey safe and well. He’s not preoccupied with romance or feeling “jilted,” where another character might resent her for it. When she hugs him on the Starkiller Base, he doesn’t turn lecherous or try to make a move. She owes him nothing, even when he risked his life to come to her aid, and he gets that! He’s not a White Knight, Friend-Zoned, or a Nice Guy. He never tries to “take” anything he wants when it comes to Rey. He doesn’t view her as a thing to take.
If Finn has a defining attribute, it’s caring about other people, as people. Kicking ass is not the priority. Winning is not the priority.
As is a cold and unaccompanied bed.
Never forget that girls think puppies and babies are super cute and that jerks and Nazis are hateful.
