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Hypergamy and delusions of equality

VD
July 18, 2014
It's not hard to understand why Sheryl Crow will never get married. The woman is remarkably delusional concerning her position vis-a-vis the men to whom she is attracted:
The 52-year-old spoke candidly about her hopes and dreams
for the future. 'Hey, I would love to get married - I'm still old-fashioned. But I don't think marriage is the be-all-and-end-all,' she admits. 'It's better to have three broken engagements than three divorces.'

While she thankfully hasn't had that many broken engagements, the country star was set to marry now-disgraced cyclist Lance Armstrong in September 2005, before calling time on their relationship in February 2006. She also famously dated actor Owen Wilson in 1999 and singer Eric Clapton prior to that, in 1996.

Speaking of her penchant for dating equally famous and successful men, she says she always ended up feeling that they made her feel small in the end, citing their need to be the bigger star in the relationship.

'I have always gone out with guys who were highly successful, which would seem like it would put me at an equal level,' she explains. 'But what ends up happening is that one of you becomes smaller - and it was always me... I do think that sometimes in order for one person's light to shine, everyone else has to dim theirs.'
Right there is the essence of hypergamous thinking. A woman goes out with a MORE SUCCESSFUL man because she is attracted to him. And, having attracted him, she therefore concludes that she is now "at an equal level". But at no point has Miss Crow ever been as successful as Lance Armstrong or Owen Wilson, to say nothing of Eric Clapton, who has been world-famous for decades.

They didn't need to be the bigger star in the relationship, they WERE the bigger star in the relationship. The problem isn't that she felt small, the problem is that she was trying to make herself feel bigger through them.

The fame issue doesn't matter to non-celebrities, but the exact same behavior is seen with regards to physical attractiveness. The female 6 who goes out with a male 8 subsequently assumes that she is an 8 and begins to behave accordingly. And therefore, it bothers her when he, and others, still regard her as being the less attractive half of the couple, EVEN THOUGH THAT IS STILL THE CASE.

Hypergamy alone is not a problem. It's necessary and desirable for successful relationships in a sexually dimorphic species. But hypergamy combined with a subsequent delusion of equality renders a woman literally unfit, in both the relationship and the Darwinian sense.

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