How often do you get rejected?

bankruptedcasino · 2014-07-23T14:56:06+00:00

This question is all fine and good, but I think it misses the point a tad.

If by "success" you mean getting a phone number, then my success rate is 90%+. I don't approach a girl unless I get clear buying signals that she wants me to talk to her, and from that point it's all about maintaining frame and not coming across as a creep to pull the digits. FYI, I only run day game. I stopped doing night game about three years ago and, when I do, it's only for SNLs.

If by "success" you mean getting a date, then my successs rate still hovers around 90%. BUT, I reject a lot of girls in the initial text-messaging, sniffing-around-for-a-date phase. If she answers my texts too slowly, if I get the sense that she's playing games, if she's boring, if she doesn't make me laugh, if her flirting needs work, if I'm just not feeling it, if I get distracted, if another plate comes back on my radar, then I'm deleting the number and moving on. I'm very picky. A girl has about three or four text messages to impress me before I'm moving on.

By definition, a preemptive rejection is rejecting a girl before she's had a chance to reject you. I'm finely tuned to the slightest hint that a girl is about to drag her feet, or that her attraction to me has waned since I pulled the number. I don't give her the satisfaction. I reject first. If you consider preemptive rejections to be actual rejections, then my "success" rate in getting a date crashes to about 20%. Part of that is me being picky. Part of that is them failing to show enthusiasm. Either way, it's less of a waste of my time to dally with women who aren't revved up and ready to go right out of the gate or who I don't feel an instant connection with (sexual or otherwise).

However, if by "success" you mean starting a sexual relationship with a beautiful woman (HB8 or higher) who is also a good person, my "success" rate is about 10%. Meaning, of the women whose numbers I get, 20% of them get a date. And of THAT group, 10% of them go to bed with me. These are all my choices. I make it clear through my actions and not my words that I'm selective and picky. Girls know the score. If I continue to text them and I continue to sit on their radar, I'm interested and that's a win for them. If I'm not interested then I delete their number and move on. They never hear from me again.

So, here's my point: the problem with using a "success" rate as a measuring stick puts the pussy on the pedestal. In my opinion, you're viewing the women as the choosers when it should be YOU who's doing the choosing. You want women, whether you meet them first or whether they know you through friends, to know that you are selective, you are picky, and you won't settle. That is far more sexy to a woman than a man who runs through numbers and plows bitches all day. Some girls are into that, sure, but the quality ones don't like players all that much. What they really like is a guy who "gets it", so they think he must be a player but they don't have the hard evidence to prove it. All they have to go off of is your psychosocial dominance (game) and the fact that women are constantly flirting with you.

If I put all the girls who I approached onto a spreadsheet and tallied up which ones I fucked from which ones I didn't, I'd probably be pretty disappointed with the results. Instead, I remember the reasons why I didn't get the bang -- nine times out of ten, it was because the girl didn't impress me or I lost interest and not the other way around. And I consider that to be a success even though I didn't put my P in a V.

Perhaps my station in life is different (I'm 31, and have had a lot of sexual partners), but for me, the most important thing is respect and admiration. There are a lot of numbers in my phone of old and new prospects, former flames, ex-girlfriends, and friends who are girls. I know that when I text them, they'll text me back right away. I know that if I ask them on a date, they won't flake. And I know that if I put it out on the line and showed them (not told them) that I'm thinking about giving them an upgrade, they'd salivate at the thought.

Which is better, a phone book full of numbers you've pulled at random, or a phone book full of women who would drop whatever plans they had with whatever schlub they're dating, just so they can get an hour of your time in order to audition their long-term potential (or their short-term potential, with extremely revealing outfits and heavy flirting)?

That's how I define success. I do the picking. They do not.

[deleted] · 2014-07-23T14:38:15+00:00

In real life, I've never asked for a number and not gotten it. Or even hung out at least once, for that matter. Most of the time we end up hanging for a month or so.

Online dating? Rejected 90% of the time. My favorite is we're having a conversation and she just abruptly stops.

Doomsday_ · 2014-07-23T17:02:49+00:00

Your inner game would benefit from changing the way you define "success." Keep in mind that most girls are simply not available, or will not click with you for whatever reason. Part of approaching is screening for girls who are into you (you don't want a girl who isn't into you, right?). Your goal when you approach should be to polarize a woman, which means to put her firmly in one camp or another. As long as you make a move and force her to make a decision, you are screening effectively and your approach is a success.

If you want to define success as "fucks the woman," your close rate will be less than 5% of women you approach. This is just something you have to accept.

[deleted] · 2014-07-23T16:46:07+00:00

2/3 for one night stands off OkCupid this month. I think the trick was to get a really good looking profile pic.

MetacognitiveMan · 2014-07-23T13:44:18+00:00

I'm not sure rejection rate as you define it is relevant.

What I mean is, if you can get to point where a rejection doesn't affect you, then you won't even notice it when it happens. Rejection is a good thing because it saves you from wasting your time.

slcjosh · 2014-07-23T18:02:54+00:00

I get "rejected" multiple times a day. But any cute thing I fancy I will talk to and ask if they want to hang out.

retsage · 2014-07-23T18:40:16+00:00

All the time at various points (going for number, first date, kiss, fuck). It is meaningless. Have fun with life and never sweat the rejections.

level_e11even · 2014-07-23T18:59:52+00:00

Like many have mentioned it doesn't really matter. If i were to put it in numbers, I'd say I get 8/10 numbers , 5/10 dates, 2/10 fucks.

variableLt · 2014-07-23T19:08:32+00:00

Latest I wrote somewhere on TRP is 8 approaches, 2 k-closes and 3 f-closes. But those were all over the place trying how far can I push TRP mentality (a lot).

TheSliceman · 2014-07-23T19:29:11+00:00

Depends on your definition of rejection.

If a hot woman approaches me in the club, I talk to her, she is receptive but then backs down cuz she is married... Does that count as rejection? I would say no.

By those standards, I really never get rejected.

knitro · 2014-07-23T20:49:27+00:00

if you aren't getting turned down, you aren't aiming high enough.

[deleted] · 2014-07-23T21:41:13+00:00

I get shut down probably 9 times out of 10. It used to be 19 out of 20 so I'd say things are improving. Most of my game occurs in loud nightclubs, approaching girls who hang out in packs. My drug dealer friend does a lot better with women, his game method is having good drugs.

[deleted] · 2014-07-23T14:41:28+00:00

As an accomplished PUA I never got rejected, never. I had a system where I would always escalate depending on the Indication Of Interest (IOI), continuing generating attraction and escalating. The system also worked in eliminating women who didn't express enough interest, so there was no rejection.

That was then and this is now.

Now I still escalate but at a much more fast phase and highly sexual, therefore one can say that my rejection rate os about 90%, but you can see it as a 10% success rate, I will have sex with 1 out of every 10 women I approach, and the sex is often the same day, wild beyond belief, with NSA.

[deleted] · 2014-07-24T00:28:16+00:00

Let's define rejection as penis not entering her vagina 1/10 means 1 fuck close out of 10 approaches Fuck closes Over the last 3 months Cold approaches in bars: 0/30 Cold approaches during the day: 0/3 Tinder matches: 4/80 Party approaches: 1/3

Kiss closes/f-closes (including 1st/2nd date): Over the last 3 months Cold approaches in bars: 5/30 Cold approaches during the day: 1/3 Tinder matches: 5/80 Party approaches: 1/3

I've got a long way to go.

Title	How often do you get rejected?
Author	The_BitterTruth
Upvotes	26
Comments	21
Date	July 23, 2014 12:11 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/2bhlkb/how_often_do_you_get_rejected/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/how-often-do-you-get-rejected.18302 https://theredarchive.com/post/18302