Celebrating Non-Toxic Masculinity

pearlsandstilettos · 2019-01-18T18:30:31+00:00

This thread is intended to celebrate positive masculinity, it is not meant to debate the Gillette campaign or argue the use of the term 'toxic masculinity'. There are plenty of other threads on Reddit about those topics. If you aren't here to share and celebrate your partner's (friend's, family member's ...) positive masculine qualities then you should move along. Off topic comments will be removed.

tuyguy · 2019-01-17T21:49:59+00:00

I think men would be less upset about the attacks on toxic masculinity if healthy masculinity were celebrated equally.

lafindublonde · 2019-01-18T01:10:46+00:00

I think this is a step in the right direction. I adore men and I wish masculinity were more celebrated. Your dude sounds like a great dude.

AgathaMysterie · 2019-01-17T18:10:15+00:00

Yes, I love this. All of it.

To me, positive masculinity is...

...when my husband works all day at the company that he’s building, comes home and plays with them/helps with dinner and bedtime, then when the rest of us are in bed, works on side projects or fixing up the house.

...when my husband brings his unique point of view to our conversations, no matter the topic. He always has insight and ideas that are different than mine.

...when my husband carries our two older kids upstairs in his arms, while I can barely handle our baby. 🙈

And SO much more. Men have, in general, some amazing traits/strengths!!

I do think there is such a thing as “toxic masculinity” (although I think a better term could be invented...), but there is just as equally such a thing as “toxic femininity”. Sigh.

ImTheCaptainNow24 · 2019-01-17T17:42:36+00:00

I think if my heels were hurting my feet and my bf literally responded by carrying me for 6 blocks my heart would explode by the time we got to the 6th block. Not really contributing much here but you're hubby is definitely brag worthy (:

notanempath · 2019-01-17T18:39:12+00:00

Wow sounds like you hit gold with your husband! Number 30 had me like “damnnnn”

I’m not familiar with the correlation between TRP and RPW but I gotta say, I’ve been casually lurking the asktrp sub for a few days and it seems to me that a lot of these things that you listed are things that a guy would be berated for doing on that sub.

Meanwhile I’d kill for a captain like this

Bored_Schoolgirl · 2019-01-18T02:39:22+00:00

Can I just say I'm jealous?

ragnarockette · 2019-01-17T20:59:24+00:00

Waiting in line for 2 and a half hours to get concert tickets to see my favorite band. Swoon.

fosho_away · 2019-01-18T01:35:41+00:00

I LOVE this post! It’s uplifting and both progressive and very RPW. Healthy masculinity is a gift 💝

DrowninLake · 2019-01-18T03:04:38+00:00

All things masculine are great. There are no toxic masculine traits. None. Toxic behavior yes, but last I checked both sexes exibit these. Imo people who coined the term and those who push it's use are not the brightest bulbs. Opt out of the brainwashing.

JimiJons · 2019-01-17T22:43:05+00:00

Registering for the draft is positive masculinity?

lindsbo · 2019-01-18T03:19:36+00:00

This makes me love RPW. Though my hubby is a firefighter and would flip about #12 :)

Lucky you! What a catch

International_Aioli · 2019-01-20T02:43:48+00:00

My husband displayed an incredible act of masculinity for me recently, and this is the only place I can brag on him! :) I was out with a few of my girlfriends at dinner at a restaurant several blocks away from our home. It started snowing just as we got there and kept going through dinner and drinks. In our area business owner often do not shovel or salt the outside. When we came outside to walk home the front of the restaurant was cleared and salted. I didn't think much about it and walked home, and the sidewalk was clear all the way.

Ladies, he saw the snow, knew around the time I would be leaving, and shoveled the front of the restaurant and a path all the way back home for me. How unbelievable is that?

surfdomx · 2019-01-18T05:56:47+00:00

I am a man. It was Gillette's tweet I hated, which said that being a boy meant doing bad things (in context, hurting girls). Calling me an abuser is like calling a woman a whore. Women with good values dont want to be called whores, and men who love the women in their lives dont want to be called abusers.

Although masculinity has both healthy and unhealthy forms, the term "toxic masculinity" makes "toxic" the default, normal form. Its like saying femininity is either slutty or a nonslutty. It is better to use "healthy" and "unhealthy" and best to use "strong" and "weak" to describe the masculine forms.

pennynotrcutt · 2019-01-17T20:15:48+00:00

Sounds like you have a real winner there. Hold on tight to him!!

Thisisforporn99999 · 2019-01-18T07:02:44+00:00

It's nice that you guys are listing kind things that your boyfriends have done for you but almost none of these are masculine. Masculine is not synonymous with things men do that you like. Masculinity is self and goal oriented and everything listed are things he did for other people. I'm not knocking any of those things and it's great you have good boyfriends but that doesn't make it masculine. Examples of positive masculinity would be things like completing their goals and overcoming obstacles along the way, remaining strong in the face of adversity, making tough decisions that are right even though people might not like it, not being worn down by failure etc. These things can absolutely help other people but they are not specifically other-oriented like the ones you listed. If anything, you guys were mostly listing positive feminine traits in a man. The positive feminine is other-focused and is about adapting to and assisting the needs of others. Inversely, this also helps the self by giving an internal self of fulfillment but are not specifically self-oriented. What you guys listed is unhelpful to lost men because as long as they think masculinity is about serving others they will never be strong enough to support a spouse or family and will collapse under the expectations of others.

Hammocknapping · 2019-01-18T20:48:46+00:00

Is a masculine quality simply a quality that a specific man has?

I’m struggling to see what about qualities 1–5, 10-11, 13-15, 17-21, 23-27 and 29-30 have to do with masculinity, because they are qualities that are not related to sex or gender.

If we are going to list masculine traits and celebrate them, it would be nice to know what can go on the list.

hellnoggin · 2019-01-18T08:51:18+00:00

What do you do in return?

D0ngl3 · 2019-01-18T16:00:06+00:00

In my experience, the women who are the loudest about hating on toxic masculinity like to be dominated sexually. Not necessarily in a degrading way, but they like to be used, objectified, and controlled sexually. This turns them on. The popularity of 50 Shades of Grey supports this point.

So, not only is there a healthy masculinity, there's even a sexually desirable masculinity. Yet the SJWs talk as if men = Nazi, for there is no "healthy Nazi" mentality. If it's male, it's assumed to be oppressive. This is horrible and sexist. Yes, you can be sexist against men and racist against white people, despite the fact that they disproportionately hold positions of wealth (let's not say "power" and confuse the issue. SJWs are more jealous than they are sticking up for the poor).

sonder_one · 2019-01-17T22:54:50+00:00

"7. Bench press my bodyweight and more"

Strength is masculine, but unless you're quite overweight, a majority of adult males who never work out can do that.

stidd1 · 2019-01-18T13:15:27+00:00

I find it odd that you only seem to celebrate his ability to carry things and fix stuff.... is that really what masculinity is all about?

throwsemallaways · 2019-01-19T21:24:52+00:00

You numbered and listed so many excellent (and sexy) masculine traits- I am trying to pick out my favorite ones- but they are all so perfect I couldn’t pick just a few! My husband is very much like your husband, and I am proud of his alpha male and masculine ways!!!!

D0ngl3 · 2019-01-18T16:11:53+00:00

Protects the well being of all things weaker than himself, like children and animals. He does this instinctively, for for no direct reward.

There's a neighborhood stray cat who I always invite inside for a drink of water or milk and some cheese. He hangs out for a bit, sometimes a few hours, then mews so I'll let him back outside. It just makes sense to take care of him, even though I'm slightly allergic to cats.

Title	Celebrating Non-Toxic Masculinity
Author	ImTheCaptainNow24
Upvotes	129
Comments	62
Date	January 17, 2019 5:37 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/ah08kh/celebrating_nontoxic_masculinity/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/celebrating-non-toxic-masculinity.196759 https://theredarchive.com/post/196759