Are all male groups so hierarchical?

innerspeaker88 · 2019-01-25T14:25:16+00:00

Leave that group of friends.

You dont need them as they dont bring you 100% of positive energies and friendship

horuspill · 2019-01-25T14:32:49+00:00

All groups are competitive, that being said, the optimal way to conduct yourself is bringing value to everyone around you. If status means the perceived value of you + your social group, it makes sense to want the best to everyone around you, not in a sacrificial way of course.

itiswr1tten · 2019-01-25T14:52:12+00:00

Looks like you haven't changed anything since you posted this

asktrp/comments/a21qxr/i_get_pushed_out_of_social_groups_easily_and_im

FereallyRed · 2019-01-25T16:20:27+00:00

All people test each other.

Whether consciously or subconsciously, via shit test, a game of chess, " never have I ever" game, or just telling somebody you've been fucking his mother.

Everybody.

Why? To see if you are who you appear to be.

Cops, firefighters, and paramedics all have a reputation for pulling prectical jokes on each other. Elaborate capers that often seem mean or cruel to the casual observer.

Filling a guy's boots with lube. Shaving off an eyebrow when they're sleeping. Getting up in his face and pretending to be upset about something trivial...

It's all just checking congruence. Do you belong in the pack? Are you socially adept or an outcast? Can I trust you to behave rationally?

THe groups I mention above are both primarily male (so more overt shit testing) and NEED to depend on the other members of their tribe in critical and dangerous situations.

If you lose your shit because I drew dicks in vaseline all over your car windows, then I probably shouldn't trust you to be a calm cool motherfucker when we go through the door of a burning building and I have to trust you got my back.

We're all just monkeys in a troop, jostling around. If you can't be social with your tribe, then why be in a society at all?

Don't fall for the femspeak... "I just genuinely care and want everyone to prosper"... no you don't. If you did you'd be stoic and absolutely none of this would even bother you... you'd be on your own plane of enlightenment, floating above all the pettiness.

You're not. You're upset you're down in the mud seeing who can pick the biggest flea off their buddy. You don't want to play the game because you're no good at it.

The game goes on. To bemoan that fact is irrational. You need to choose whether to play, or not, and make peace with that choice.

Redpill - Lets play!

Blackpill - I hate this game, I'm going home.

Bluepill - What game?

IVIaskerade · 2019-01-25T15:27:51+00:00

All male groups are hierarchical, but not all are positive models.

thrwy75479 · 2019-01-25T16:41:20+00:00

Firstly, why do you care about whether or not they want to see you succeed? Do you need something from them to succeed? If not, then it really doesn't matter.

You just have to do you. Find people that can help you reach your goals. Your results will speak for themselves. Of course, this will require lots of effort on your part.

Secondly, try to gain an objective perspective. Are they truly trying to sabotage your life? Or, is it playful teasing that is normal among any social group, men and women included? Are they being too hard? Or, are you being too soft? Look within for answers.

Can you imagine a group where there is no teasing like that? Everyone is all lovey-dovey, and singing Kumbaya around the campfire. There would also be a constant state of anxiety where everyone is trying their best not to hurt anyone's feelings, and being extra positive. It would be akin to looking at people's Instagram feeds: positive, happy, smiling, laughing, playing, all the time.

To a normal person this would become extremely irritating, and only serve to make you weak when facing reality (outside of your group) where no one really cares about you.

You also cannot connect with people this way. For an example, watch the movie "Inside Out". Positive cannot exist without negative.

Shit talking is an art form, and the only way to counteract it is to talk shit back. Learn from them. It is important to know how to be verbally aggressive, and when to do so.

FieldLine · 2019-01-25T21:26:51+00:00

My friends don't seem to genuinely care for each other's success.

Find better friends. You don't need more than two or three, contrary to what facebook will have you believe.

Don_Draper27 · 2019-01-25T20:17:30+00:00

What kind of low SMV scum must you be to consider people like this “friends”?

itiswr1tten · 2019-01-25T15:13:22+00:00

Looks like you haven't changed anything since you posted this

asktrp/comments/a21qxr/i_get_pushed_out_of_social_groups_easily_and_im

fromthebottom · 2019-01-25T15:14:06+00:00

Maybe when playing video games against each other.. but my buddies wanna share advice and knowledge not put each other down

supersonic-turtle · 2019-01-25T17:17:29+00:00

Not really man. A solid group of friends recognizes achievements and praise success of their buds. Now face to face shit talk is just how men bond. If it's targeted and intended to hurt that's some toxic beta shit. Im known to get bromosexual and banter about someone's sub par bball skills but it's not straight up "fuck you" attitude more like I admire you bruh. In my circle all of us have attributes and all of us have our own level of leadership we don't have a chief.

spider_1337 · 2019-01-25T23:58:10+00:00

If you look at your friends in your circle and don't get motivated then you don't have a circle, you have a cage

keelo44 · 2019-01-26T00:51:53+00:00

Sounds like you’ve gotta bunch of dudes that act like bitches for friends, separate yourself and find some real friends.

[deleted] · 2019-01-25T18:35:47+00:00

Friends = just people you hang out with.

That's the new definition.

Title	Are all male groups so hierarchical?
Author	PM_ME_UR_1ITIS_SNAP
Upvotes	10
Comments	21
Date	January 25, 2019 2:11 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/ajpdn2/are_all_male_groups_so_hierarchical/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/are-all-male-groups-so-hierarchical.203412 https://theredarchive.com/post/203412