Mixed signals from wife lately

BobbyPeru · 2018-11-09T18:06:44+00:00

You’re overthinking it. Quit caring so much about what she thinks and says. It’s hard to say without knowing her, but this is most likely what /u/bluepillprofessor refers to as a “shitty comfort test.” If that’s the case, hold frame, do a little A&A, and then provide a little comfort- maybe a kiss on the forehead. The madonna whore complex could be at work here also. Also, she could be confused by the newer alpha you, so maybe pull back a little... in other words STFU, lift, and sidebar.

The point is, there could be a lot of factors. Don’t try to figure it out- it just puts you in her frame.

MrChad_Thundercock · 2018-11-09T16:25:06+00:00

Classic shit test. Testing to see if you’re a man she really wants to fuck. Over the top AA these.

Shes also trying to keep you Beta- although she really wants a strong alpha to fuck her, she can’t risk other women finding you attractive too- she doesn’t want you to become a dominate alpha - she could potentially lose her provider ($) husband to other women.

So she’s shaming your alpha behavior as being perverted.

“but for two days it's there and then it's gone.”

Look up Responsive Desire, awalt. That’s why you need to Game them. Need to manufacture and built it up. Women are not always dtf like men are.. deep down they are, but need to bring it forth.

“Conversation went on for a bit..”

Stop listening to what she says faggot. Stop having conversations. AWALT.

mindfulbutgutless · 2018-11-09T16:21:17+00:00

When was the last time you just flirted, with no intention of escalation? When was the last time you tried to initiate when it was still light out?

treat her like a piece of meat

this response is usually do to dehydrated men dry humping their legs.

Cam_Winston21 · 2018-11-09T17:20:21+00:00

Monday/Tuesday - wonderfully sweet, great passionate sex (better than in a really long time). Wednesday she went to bed early, last night she went to bed early.

Maybe she was tired on Wednesday & Thursday. Did she "go to bed" (aka, watch TV or scroll facebook) or did she go to sleep?

robertwservice1974 · 2018-11-09T17:41:26+00:00

I have heard the nun comment several times over the years. Means “you make me feel like I should become a nun.”

I used to tell her: “You are a nun. You ain’t givin’ nun and I ain’t gettin nun’.” [CRINGE]

If she ever says it again, I’ll tell her I also have a nun fantasy, and how I’ll buy her a habit so we can do a little nun role playing....

UnbreakableFrame · 2018-11-10T03:44:14+00:00

Conversation ...

And that's where you fucked up.

Bedtimeshine · 2018-11-10T19:18:11+00:00

I see it differently then some of the other commenters. I think she’s trying to block your access to sex with her and saying what she’s gotta say to squash the possibility right now and in the near future. And her being turned on those days were due to outside influences. I smell another man on the horizon.

wkndatbernardus · 2018-11-09T18:29:30+00:00

She's transferring her shame to you. She is appalled at her self for liking the D so hard and raw so she is trying to shift blame for being such a ho. I bet she has some sexual hangups/guilt from the past that are coming up now.

So, it's a good sign that you are bringing this side of her to the surface where she can get used to it and (gasp!) enjoy it. Nice work.

hack3ge · 2018-11-09T20:52:01+00:00

My general thought here is she is getting buyers remorse and needed to see if you actually deserved what she gave you. I've noticed when I push the boundaries on her sexually it almost is immediately followed by some serious shit testing. I'd argue you could be perfect in terms of passing tests and she still needs to figure out her own feelz.

Some guys here get quick results and slowly build up over time as my guess is that they were alpha at one point in their relationship. I'm one of those guys who was never alpha and wife never saw me that way so its more of a cycle of acceptance/testing. I'll push her boundaries, she will shit test me into oblivion and even if I pass I can sense the skepticism in her acceptance of the change. She slowly comes back to where she is okay with it and then rinse and repeat. I actually find it comical at this point because I can see the moment where she starts to accept it and move forward - silly woman.

DeplorableRay · 2018-11-09T21:43:13+00:00

Shutting down during ovulation? You're not confused, you're in denial. They only want their #1 during tat time. Your genes are being selected against. You're not attractive enough.

SteelToeShitKicker · 2018-11-10T03:25:22+00:00

Today she says she thinks I'm perverted, treat her like a piece of meat,

I do like a good piece of steak.

mrpthrowa · 2018-11-12T15:08:21+00:00

Stop fucking worrying so much about her.

HERE2SHILL · 2018-11-24T02:30:51+00:00

Sex everyday is way too much for her anyway.. Learn to masturbate

[deleted] · 2019-03-18T13:36:54+00:00

I know this post comes late, but I just came across this post. I had (still have) a very similar situation to yours. Things with my wife were good for the first year of marriage, then the sexual frequency began to decline. I went into a short period of neediness and passive aggressive behavior patterns (about 2 to 3 months). Completely blew things up. My wife's desire began to disappear and sex dropped from 12 times a month down to 4 or 5. 100% my doing and I own that shit.

Then, like many men on here, I found the red pill. I stopped the needy victim behavior and began to improve myself (still working on it... I'm a few months into the red pill). I noticed the sexual responses and desire began to reappear, BUT they were hot and cold like yours. I'd get bout of 3 to 5 days of wild and passionate sex, then it would wain for a week to a week and a half, then return (still in that cycle somewhat). My wife will be into me passionately with desire and hunger, then the next week, she will shit test and say things like, "I'm struggling with my desire", or "all you want is sex and I feel objectified", or "you don't understand me", or "You've always been an asshole", "or now you're making me feel like I did in my first marriage and I don't know how to get out of this", "I struggle to even spend time with you".... blah blah blah. All in the back of my mind, I think, "that's not that your actions were telling me 5 days ago when I went out with some buddies, and when I came home you were in a piece of sexy lingerie throwing yourself at me, then I Sex God Methoded the shit out of you and had you screaming for more!"

I stopped DEERing and STFU. Women only see the NOW. There is no relationship equity with them. Last week when I was fucking the shit out of her and had her screaming didn't mean shit."

Here's another.... I came home on Friday night and didn't feel like talking and / or wanted to be left alone (i.e. wasn't present). She asked if I was mad at her and she became affectionate with me. I took her in my arms and kissed her passionately and gave her my presence. As the night went on, I kind of ignored her and did my own thing. After the kids went to bed, she walked up to me in a defensive and pissy mood and said, "Good night, I'm going up to bed." Now, we would usually spend time together, which then usually led to sex, but she wouldn't have it. I looked at her and said, "I want you to come sit with me." She replied, "No, you've been disconnected and standoffish all day... why would I want to spend time with you." I saw this as a shit test. I told her, "Ok, I understand, but I still would like to spend time with you." She got pissed and went to bed. The next couple days she was in a foul and bitchy mood. I did my own thing and reset each day. The next day I got the speech of her not wanting sex with me and how I objectify her and how I put her in the place she's in. I listened briefly and told her ok, then told her I loved her, kissed her on the forehead and went downstairs.

This is the cycle I'm in now. I'm just getting into dread level 3. My choice is to keep moving forward.

Where are you now? Please provide an update. Thanks.

Title	Mixed signals from wife lately
Author	LongRoad_518
Upvotes	10
Comments	50
Date	November 9, 2018 4:11 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/9vlply/mixed_signals_from_wife_lately/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/mixed-signals-from-wife-lately.203802 https://theredarchive.com/post/203802