How to get a Girlfriend in the Modern Age of Social Media

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August 19, 2020

Actually meet these women (Approach, online dating, meet through friend's events/parties, clubs (dancing, workouts, etc), you're not going to meet members of the opposite sex at home complaining on reddit...

Eliminate all neediness ( chasing a woman's validation = death sentence), develop an abundance mindset (He who doesn't want usually gets). BE ON YOUR PURPOSE. Scarcity = high value (human psychology).


More texts you send = less value you have in their eyes. TEXTING IS FOR LOGISTICS ONLY (In the dating stage).

You sell yourself in person. The more you text , the better chance you have of talking them out of liking you.

Overpursue a woman = get rejected. DO NOT CHASE. Text them ( once a week) to setup the date for the 1st 3 dates. By the 3rd date, THEY SHOULD BE THE ONES REACHING OUT TO YOU. If not, HARD NEXT. You don't want to be in a relationship with somebody that has low interest in you right?

When they reach out to you ("hiii I was just thinking about you, I had a great time on saturday"), you setup a date and thats it. NO TEXTING IN BETWEEN. However, they will usually reach out to you in between, and you can acknowledge them, thats okay. You don't want to coldfish a woman. However, do not blow up her phone or have a 4 hour long phonecall. You're literally doing yourself a disservice. ATTRACTION IS FORMED IN PERSON.

During the dates you should be escalating physically from -> touching their hands/shoulders/ hugs -> kisses -> sex.

The Objective of a date is to have a fun filled romantic time and to create an opportunity for sex to happen.

A WOMAN DEVELOPS HER FEELINGS FOR YOU WHEN YOU GIVE THEM SPACE TO. They are wondering WHY ISN'T THIS GUY CHASING ME LIKE THE OTHER 99% OF GUYS DO. YOU ARE ON THEIR MIND. When you are texting them 24/7 and blowing up their phone, WHY THE HELL WOULD THEY EVEN THINK ABOUT YOU. She's going to be wondering about the one guy she fucked passionately and why he hasn't reached out to her yet. BE THAT GUY

Let the woman be the one to want the relationship. If you've been doing everything right, she should be the one to say "What are We", "Are we dating", "Are you seeing other girls", by the 7th week of you doing this. This is your opportunity to ask her what she means, and to get exclusivity (if thats what you want).

Usually, when a guy gets all clingy and mopey/emotional after meeting the girl for the first time and he starts to over pursue, the woman gets all uncomfortable because the man is being a WOMAN. All that relationship stuff is feminine energy.

As a MALE WITH MASCULINE ENERGY, literally all you have to do is setup the date, have a fun time, have sex with her, and withdraw yourself emotionally after. THIS IS WHY WOMEN ARE ATTRACTED TO "ASSHOLES" , "EMOTIONALLY UNAVAILABLE MEN", "PLAYERS" all that shit. These men are being MALES IN THEIR MASCULINE. They aren't being little simp boys begging for validation or for a relationship. Leave the relationship to the women. Nice guys = FEMININE ENERGY



- NON-NEEDINESS IS ESSENTIAL. The relationship is the womans idea (that is FEMININE ENERGY).

- The man's job is to setup the date, have a fun time and create an opportunity for sex to happen. THAT is MASCULINE ENERGY.

Post Information
Title How to get a Girlfriend in the Modern Age of Social Media
Author Aspiringbucket
Upvotes 801
Comments 141
Date 19 August 2020 08:25 AM UTC (8 months ago)
Subreddit TheRedPill
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Red Pill terms found in post:
simpabundancescarcitythe red pillhard nexting

[–]1atticusfinch1973290 points291 points  (8 children) | Copy

This is exactly why you spin plates, ie date and have sex with multiple women at the same time.

Another part of this I'd add from a psychology piece is we are trained to feel guilty for this type of behaviour as men. Don't let society tell you that being a "player" or a "fuckboi" is a bad thing.

[–]that_star_wars_guy55 points56 points  (2 children) | Copy

Don't let society tell you that being a "player" or a "fuckboi" is a bad thing.

If you've set expectations from the beginning, there's nothing to feel guilty about or feel bad for.

If there's an issue well, how hard is it to replace a plate that won't spin?

[–]1Ill_mumble_that20 points21 points  (0 children) | Copy

Exactly. If I want to sleep with other women, I dont hide it. There is no need to hide it, we are men. Fuck anyone that shames us for being men.

[–]RemiOmega44 points45 points  (3 children) | Copy

I don't like the term fuckboy, most fuckboys I know are just superficial (because they wear streetwear or some "badass" clothes), but most of them are betas in the inside.

[–]volvostupidshit14 points15 points  (2 children) | Copy

Yeah most of them can act abudant because they have the looks but once they lose it they will not know how to recover.

[–]RemiOmega6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

Exactly, you need a strong frame and mindset, looks are very helpful, but without a strong mentality you'll lose it not matter what.

[–]Angelrun0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Most of them don’t lift hahaha

[–]Coolrubbings120 points121 points  (5 children) | Copy

Great write-up.

Let me add that guys, getting rejected is not the end of the world, I’ve met up with girls, they rejected my advances, and I didn’t react negatively and just went home about my day.

Sometimes they hit me up again later and we fuck, sometimes they don’t, it’s a numbers game.

[–]CHAD_J_THUNDERCOCK8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

Some (most?) of the hottest women I've been with initially brutally rejected me. Then I would handle it unphased and they would a day or two later be super into me. For a long time I genuinely believed it was the only way to date above my league.

[–]1Sisyphus_XIV178 points179 points  (29 children) | Copy

Wait a minute, what do you guys call a "girlfriend" ?

These are good tips for plating, but not so good for finding an LTR, i.e. a meaningful relationship. If you act like a robot, follow an instructions manual, act a certain way to get a certain thing instead of being cool and honest, you'll have a real hard time connecting with the person, and the relationship will end up feeling really shallow.

I believe it's important to keep that in mind. Thanks for the post.

[–]Ryzasu63 points64 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'd say this post is only meant for the initial stages of dating

[–]INNASKILLZ2K1840 points41 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is how you build attraction in the beginning.

You shouldn't be thinking anything in regards to LTR's during this phase. That's later.

[–]Stron2g60 points61 points  (15 children) | Copy

LTR red pill is an entirely different beast

[–]DetroitGangster42 points43 points  (11 children) | Copy

It is basically dealing with female nature set on the hardest fucking difficulty

[–]Stron2g33 points34 points  (9 children) | Copy

Yep. You need a steel frame to have a successful LTR.

[–]dopexile30 points31 points  (3 children) | Copy

And even then the benefit is not worth the reward. Most women will try hard in the beginning to portray they are a great catch.

Over time they will feel secure, start to coast, and make less effort. The cost in terms of your time and energy will exceed any benefits.

[–][deleted]  (2 children) | Copy


[–]dopexile5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

As someone who pays child support, that is a plan for having a child. Anyone depending on a woman to take birth control is gambling with their future.

Very few women take the pill at the same time everyday as directed which makes it much less effective.

A woman can decide to just stop taking the pill to trap a man and lock him down if she thinks that is in her best interest. Wow, I forgot to take my pill. I Can't believe I got pregnant while I was on the pill. It happens a lot more than you would think.

[–]Irreverent_Alligator17 points18 points  (3 children) | Copy

And now my grandpa’s extremely successful 55 years and counting marriage makes sense. It’s all frame.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy


[–]PhilipChr1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

That's the problem with today's society isn't it? The human mind has not evolved to deal with this type of temptation and abundance of choice. Coupled with female hypergamy it's a recipe for disaster. What's the solution then for LTR's? Not dating girls active on these apps? Either that or being ok with open relationships is the path of least resistance.

[–]Stron2g2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Your grandfather must be John Wayne's twin - doesnt take shit from Indians, black people, nor Mexicans (Boondocks reference ofc)

[–]michael1962-018 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy

Yes and No. AWALT still holds. Text will be more than logistics.

Power play will be daily task to deal with.

[–]Stron2g5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

The fundamentals will always be necessary.

What I meant to say was in regard to the difficulty not quite the strategies involved.

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet16 points17 points  (1 child) | Copy

The tips for finding plates and girlfriends are the same. The reason is because it's up to the girl to inspire you to want to make her a girlfriend.

Once you find a girl who is worthy of a LTR, you take the appropriate steps to train her.

Side bar. Guides to Managing Bitches and Training Bitches.

[–]1Sisyphus_XIV1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

True. I guess the wording of the post is what made me react: I mean if you still have to obey a manual to pull, you're not ready for an LTR.

[–]oic12313 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy

OP isn't telling anyone to lie or be uncool.

[–]zino19322 points23 points  (2 children) | Copy

No, you do not create connection - it forms. If you "sell" yourself as a boyfriend you lost the game before it even starts.

A meaningfull relationship =/= I need a mommy figure to nurture me.

A meaningfull relationship is one where she molds to your life - and supports because that is her sinking in her feminine nature. It has nothing to do with you or what you want, it's about her and what she wants, what she feels she has to do.

Your job is to be masculine, to offer her strenght, guidence, teachings. This opens her up to be feminine and give you more of herself.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy


[–]1Ill_mumble_that7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

meaningful relationship

Define meaningful. Have you actually spent time with women?

Other than sex, I can't think of a time that hanging with my buddies isn't better. Women are boring outside of sex and cuddles.

[–]WesternRattle4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

Take a look at the married redpill sidebar to get more info on that.

To find an LTR, follow OP's post then agree to be exclusive with them. Then, use the tools from married redpill sidebar to create a strong relationship.

[–]hearse2236 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

"LTR redpill" is more in the purplepill realm.

Redpill classic rejects LTRs and marriage, spinning plates is the only focus.

[–]ofcrow2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is actually not true at all, you can get and keep a girlfriend doing this in the first stages, and then let the relationship develop. Hopefully with some red pill LTR knowledge so you don’t become blue pill again.

[–]welderblyad65 points66 points  (6 children) | Copy

Just gonna say this texting "only for logistics" shit has caused many girls to flake on me over the years. I stopped doing that shit more than 5 years ago.

[–]DetroitGangster49 points50 points  (0 children) | Copy

Same here man. I thought I was being mysterious and more of a valuable man because my time was limited but a ton of girls stopped chasing because they took it as me being cold or dismissive. Now adays, I still don't over-text but I definitely send over some quick playful banter "check-ins" to keep the rapport going in order to set up more "logistics" for a date.

[–]yellowsquare198033 points34 points  (0 children) | Copy

Exactly, considering women are on their phones 95% of their day (even when they’re “working”) they want something to look forward to or someone to respond.

Sure don’t overwhelm her but the conventional advice for logistics only doesn’t work for me.

[–]1Sisyphus_XIV41 points42 points  (1 child) | Copy

Same. it's about time we dropped that advice.

[–]eddielovett16 points17 points  (0 children) | Copy

The advice is solid for most guys since they would otherwise over text and blow it

[–]redditthrowaway14782 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

All depends on how strong of an impression you made. When it comes to OLD, 99% of the time you’re right that you’ll have to keep the fire stoked until you can meet, but the better her first impression of you, the less you have to care about this Maintinence step

[–]1empatheticapathetic54 points55 points  (32 children) | Copy

Why would an online dating girl meet you if you have established zero rapport over text?

[–]narcissistPenguin21 points22 points  (7 children) | Copy

As the OP said, don't overchase. Ofc you'll have to text in online dating, but making the woman feel like she's all you've got is a cock blocker. Even if you're only talking to only one girl, you've to keep your frame intact. Jealousy and competition are the guiding factors.

[–]1empatheticapathetic34 points35 points  (6 children) | Copy

Yeah that's fine. But this whole "texting for logistics" never made sense to me when its OLD. You need to give them a reason to want to meet you.

[–]askmrcia13 points14 points  (3 children) | Copy

You're right. The only time i would do text for logistics for an online girl is if they are responding to my first two messages slow or have a few words of text.

If they going to be low effort off the bat then so should you. I think the whole text for logistics thing came about because guys really do struggle with texting when trying to build rapport.

Like guys don't know when they should text, how often, how long the messages should be, should they use emojies or not, ect... (tip, none of this really matters. If they trip over this then they aren't worth the effort anyways).

So texting for logistics takes all that away.

[–]destraht3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

You text-only for logistics in scenes/peoples that are played out. If a place hasn't raced to the bottom yet then you can show a bit more humanity. Most of the Red Pill in 2020 is about how to lick more droplets of moisture from the cactus in the morning.

[–]thop890 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Why not get better at texting? To cut texting off is fucking absurd.

[–]Chopsbumbus1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thats what your pictures are for.

[–]Modredpillschool1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I had a chuckle reading this, because to me it was more like a list of instructions on how not to meet anybody online...

Don't chase, don't approach, avoid contact, and get laid!

[–]dopexile3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

For a man in the top 10% they can be a criminal and they will meet up. Just look at how some of these conversations go... some girls agree to meet up and bang on the second and third text.

Opening with "Wanna bang" works successfully.

[–]1empatheticapathetic8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah I’m well aware of these convos. I cannot relate ha.

[–]chomponthebit6 points7 points  (7 children) | Copy

Abundance mentality: you match, be fun, make a meeting IMMEDIATELY, and prove why your p oughtta be in her v in person

[–]1empatheticapathetic23 points24 points  (5 children) | Copy

You've ignored the issue in your response. Why is she meeting me? The question is based on experience. Arranging this meet immediately never works. People don't go meet someone they don't know without some conversation first (unless you're chad thundercock).

[–]IslayGuppy2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy

If that’s the case for you then maybe you just didn’t create the right setting. It’s just like kino, you work up to a point. Close to half of my messages sent before meeting are about us meeting or doing something together. Meeting up is why you’re there, it’s the natural thing to do, make it feel like the natural thing to do.

[–]1empatheticapathetic5 points6 points  (3 children) | Copy

So texting isn’t just for logistics then? Not sure what you’re trying to say.

[–][deleted]  (2 children) | Copy


[–]1empatheticapathetic0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I literally just said I don’t know what he’s saying. And then I confirmed “so texting isn’t just for logistics then?”.

I don’t get matches anymore anyway so it’s irrelevant. Just never understood how the TFL rule actually was supposed to work.

[–]TheMF-J1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

This doesn’t work in my experience. Go for the meet too soon and you come off too intense/desperate. You should be busy. Make her suggest the meet first once you’ve been talking on the app for a little while.

[–]Pleasenodrugs2 points3 points  (8 children) | Copy

U can use insta or snap to create rapport, show ur life and pre selection

[–]1empatheticapathetic10 points11 points  (7 children) | Copy

Never been one to broadcast my life on insta. Just not my thing. What would i broadcast, my daily grind?

[–]Pleasenodrugs11 points12 points  (4 children) | Copy

Whatever u want really. I’ll post jokes, funny shit I see, racing cars, cool parties. Just having fun really and I got a bunch of girls that watch my shit religiously like a soap opera lol. Fact is most girls under 25 will think ur a weirdo if u don’t post on social media

[–]1empatheticapathetic7 points8 points  (3 children) | Copy

I got an insta but haven't posted anything for 2+ years. Occasionally post a story here and there when its something i'm proud of. Culled my pics down to 40 or something. Everyone else on my insta, girls and guys, just post their normal shit. Seems boring as fuck to me.

[–]Pleasenodrugs5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy

Yeah u gotta stick out. Post some crazy shit. Jump off a building bro

[–]1empatheticapathetic12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy

True true. Probably won't bother tho

[–]stefan007901 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Done that now they unfollowed because i don't post anymore

[–]drewshaver0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I post my collection of art, some made myself but mostly collected. Just gotta post stuff about one of your hobbies.

[–]Greek-God-Brody0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

  • parties
  • day at the pool
  • playing some sport with the guys
  • hiking / nature time

Post stories that show an attractive lifestyle

[–]Runatir0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Because you are attractive

[–]FadedTony0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Basically have a goal in mind before texting her. Don't text for no reason. You can start a convo getting to know them but your goal at the end is to set up a meeting, date etc. that's how I took it as and how I've seen this kind of advice on other platforms.

Don't over text (long paragraphs) just match their energy or less if you can. But yes you're right it's not literally just logistics like "hey let's meet up on X for Y" and then that's it, show your personality and have a goal/plan in place for your texts

[–]Sumsar010 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Easy. My best opener yet is "can i tempt with wine or beer?"

[–]jasondougies0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

big facts bro. those who claims only text for logisitcss makes me think they dont get anything lol.

[–][deleted]  (2 children) | Copy


[–]SoA_MC2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thought it sounded familiar

[–]Masupilamii2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Agreed he basically Stole coreys practices

[–]18cmOfGreatness30 points31 points  (1 child) | Copy

So many rules to follow when you actually should just do one single thing - put your interests above hers while having no fear of losing her. It is my way or highway. The relationship with her exists for your satisfaction, you know that you are the prize and that it would be her loss if the relationship ends.

Trying to do "the right cool high value thing", trying to "do what alpha should" is just another form of betaness and neediness. Instead of trying to not be needy so that she didn't left you - just stop being needy by changing your priorities from keeping her around to satisfying your desires, either with her or with someone else.

The real high-value man is egoistic and follows his desires more than anything else. He isn't trying hard to keep the girl around him by following rules he have read somewhere.

[–]nebraskaguy4025 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yuuup. Dated a girl for 5 weeks. Didn't care about her for the first month and she was all about me. The last week I started engaging over text more, got feelings for her, asked her when I could see her again and she couldn't have bounced sooner. Took 3 days of me texting her like 4 to 5 texts spaced throughout each day to completely kill her attraction for me when we would go a day or two without talking prior. I was shocked but I only have myself to blame. Played the "I'm stressed at work and need space, you're a great guy and its nothing you did wrong" card. She then had a firefighter in her friend group blowing her back out a few weeks later.

[–]when_its_too_late4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

The man's job is to setup the date, have a fun time and create an opportunity for sex to happen. THAT is MASCULINE ENERGY.

How many times can we repeat the same point with different vernacular...

[–]prajyotgupta15 points16 points  (2 children) | Copy

Ah, I see a 3% man, ain't it?

[–]TrippyRolly8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy

Almost word for word with a few other tidbits sprinkled in

[–]ZachMeadows21 points22 points  (4 children) | Copy

It's not as easy as that write up.

In their sexual prime (if they are above average) women will post a picture online and get hundreds of matches in a day, why would they bother try to know you, especially if you are not 'advertised' as in lots of stories on Insta ?

Have you ever seen a girl put thought and research an actual well manufactured, solid yet good looking wrist watch ? No, they all wear that Daniel Wellington chinese crap they saw in between stories or that someone else gifted them.

You build an influence through whatever means. Social media is the most prominant nowadays, sadly, but it can be achievement at school, work, sports club, charity associations or local bar events. Once you are "the guy", you can play your game and pull.

Or you know, be attractive.

[–]zino19315 points16 points  (3 children) | Copy

Sorry doomer, but most women don't know what they want. Stop taking at face value what they do.

You can be a plumber, be aloof, be scarce and spike her feelings when you're with her and have a IDGAF attitude when you aren't.

Leave the INCEL culture at entry. It's not only possible to fuck the club slut withour a rolex, it's even more likely because if she is a status hunter she will hold out for the guys she is actively pursuing and get her rocks off with a FWB on the side.

There is a difference between what she thinks is dating, and what she actually fucks. You want to be the fucker, not the one she dates and parades around social media.

[–]ZachMeadows5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy

[EDIT] : I've red the original post again and your comment in the main thread.

Just to clarify, I'm saying that getting that first date can be a difficutl task when the girl is always being notified on social media.

Indeed when she 'kinda' knows you and you've established yourself the advices are sound. It's just that meeting someone randomly at a bar and leaving such a good impression that she will think about you when you are playing hard to get is not how it works.

Nowadays people don't even bother registering names on their phone, so sending a text every 4 days to set up a date is going to be difficult. [/EDIT]

Sorry doomer

Nice, I like it.

I know that women don't know what they want, or how they're feeling at any given point. And I agree with your statement about your job and how you act.

And yes you can fuck the club slut, thanks to the setting and the alcohol.

But IMO if you don't have a 'seal of value' of any kind, you don't get to be picked if you are not good looking.

Now the post was on getting a girlfriend in the modern age of social media. It is easier to be the fucker than to get a girlfriend when starting from scratch. That is not what I was talking about.

Being established (in your group of friend for example) will make it easier to pull girls at a bar or at a party than to be the new guy.

Stop taking at face value what they do

I've done that and got away with it lots of times. But it isolate you. You start to lose empathy and just live in your own selfish/assholey bubble and people will notice.

It works, maybe can help one get laid, but you will not build meaningful relationships whether with males or females.

Leave the INCEL culture at entry.

I considere myself an incel, but I don't use it as an excuse. I encourage people to adapt and increase SMV accordingly.

[–]zino1930 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Just to clarify, I'm saying that getting that first date can be a difficutl task when the girl is always being notified on social media.

I respect that follow up and the thoughtfull reply.

I think neither me or OP are talking about pick up tehniques. Sarge pick up is not really what you do after you get 2 plates.

What OP was talking was more lifestyle design. Something that sounds a bit alien unless you passed that stage of scarcity.

What I complemented was more about mindset - trying to bridge the gap between the PUA that has a clear short term goal and the plate spinning lifestyle of a red pill man that integrated pick up into his life and is focusing on other things and has the women part just as a component of his life.

Nowadays people don't even bother registering names on their phone, so sending a text every 4 days to set up a date is going to be difficult. [/EDIT]

I think texting is just a umbrella term for short form text comunication. Most people do instagram nowadays, but it varies. As for setting up the date - again this is a misunderstanding between the short term pick up artist and the lifestyle approach. Fundamentally you should not have time or interest to insist and have a texting session with a girl. (unless she is making the effort and trying to make it interesting - in which case you imediatlly reward with a: I'm done with work, come at my place and bring a good wine and <insert call back to something you talked about.>).

But IMO if you don't have a 'seal of value' of any kind, you don't get to be picked if you are not good looking.

Again that misunderstanding. You have value for being a man. Honestly - most women suck at entertaining themselfs and are so bored. Most women do not have access to Chad because they aren't sultry HB8+. It's just about minset - and there everything else branches out - the aloofness, the intensity and the fun slip and slide to sexy time.

You know alreayd that :

When women say they want kind and gentle they are talking about the hawt guy. Similarly when inexperienced men with scarcity talk about women being picky, they aren't talking about the 7 that doesn't put herself toghether and has less than $200 / month make up budget. You are talking about the dominant, sexually agressive top girl in an enviroment where she is the prize and can find another guy to entertain her just by turning her head. Yes man, definetly - you must be Hot Guy +8 for her to notice you among her orbiters. Yes man, you need to be the group leader of a mixed group for her to invest the initial 2 minutes. BUT: most women aren't there and EVEN those women, will be open to give you 2 minutes if you meet her while she is waiting for her friends or if you meet her in a professional enviroment where you are the one calling the shots and crushing it.

But it isolate you. You start to lose empathy and just live in your own selfish/assholey bubble and people will notice.

I disagree that is actually empathy and I will argue more in my next paragraph. I want to argue that the bubble is your frame - everyone has it. Whether you are a blue boy that thinks he can turn the girl chatting and laughing at your memes and the feminist that think that if he saves enough damsells one will inevitably slip and fall on his dick. Similarly with super front brain heavy MGTOWs or Incels - your frame is your own and it's built because self image is important to us as humans, it provides a reference for who we are and helps us engage with new situations. My question is - is it enough? Are those values yours or societies? Do you have them ebcause you see them work, or because the alternative is scary as shit. Think about it - does your framework actually make you happy, or have you just accepted and built upon years of pain and loneliness. No shade, I was a doomer too. And still have those lonely nights between christmas and nye.

It works, maybe can help one get laid, but you will not build meaningful relationships whether with males or females.

Until you make a woman come that woman can not be honest with you. Emotionally she is afraid to open up and be vulnerable. Only after her body is "conquered" lead by her insticts - and all the shit testing that comes from them - can she truly let her guard down, stop with the manipulation and the image projection. That being said - is anything other than fuckery - actual empathy? Are you relating to the slut? the chick that dreamt of sucking off a horse - or the little girl that learned from a early age to put on a play pretend of high status, high expectations and the one that needs to be wooed and won over. Women love arseholes because they are the only ones that they actually get to meet. They are the only ones that make her feel like a woman, not a caracter in a simulation of their life. And thruth be told - men are similar - at least blue pill men. They act as men. That's not emphaty, that's a role they learned to play. Being emphatetic to a woman that is trowing away her life on activism and gender studies is a bitch slap. If you genuinely care for her as a human, you will threat her as a drug addict. But that's not the "empaty" that is expected of us. <there is no feminist fuckable feminist that is, that didn't admit her beliefs are bullshit - they just use it because they don't have power and control over their life>

I considere myself an incel, but I don't use it as an excuse. I encourage people to adapt and increase SMV accordingly.

That's nice, but that sounds to my ears: I consider myself dead. Man, unless a horse stomped on your head when you were a kid - you are not too ugly for a girl. And even if you do get ripped at the gym and you will change how you think of yourself and how others think of themselfs. Trust me, there's some ugly motherfuckers in the gym - a busted face seems to just give the muscles street cred.

[–]ZachMeadows0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I feel like we agree on some points and have a nice conversation about some others where we do not. That's a nice change.

I think neither me or OP are talking about pick up tehniques.

Fair enough. It might be where the discussion diverge.

trying to bridge the gap between the PUA [...] and has the women part just as a component of his life.

I completely agree on that.

Most people do instagram nowadays, but it varies.

It is an entirely different topic, but to me it boils down to respect. Also, when you failed to give a woman tingles on the first encounter, she doesn't register you and never bother to reply. Only the ones she registered are in the "maybe" category. I don't have a problem with it, but when you do not know that, you invest (all things considers of course) time and effort to set up dates with no return and it can wear down self esteem.

Of course, self worth, soft next, aloofness, DGAF, etc... are valid points for another discussion.

About your point on the 2min window. I agree, that's how I've been doing all these years. But maybe it's dependent on local culture, where I live it's all about legitimacy. If you come out of nowhere, it will be harder to get the girl to agree to a date. Kinda like if you are not part of the company, you cannot join the afterwork event. It is possible, but considerably harder.

Think about it - does your framework actually make you happy, or have you just accepted and built upon years of pain and loneliness.

You have a good point. It is difficult but I must admit that it is the latter for me.

Until you make a woman come that woman can not be honest with you.

Completely agree. But the rest of the paragraph is confusing.

[–]Zech4riah5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy


Important to understand. Yet again last week one of my old plates contacted me again (I guess this was 4th time when she returned.) She knows that I won't be monogamous. Usually she goes away to "try it out with this new dude" and won't see me for 3-4 months and then she comes back. Little by little she has been more open/talkative about her attempts to get that love dovey monogamous relationship which fails every time because of the same reason:

She is attracted and interested of the guy for the first 4-5 dates and then the guy gets needy and fucks it up and then she loses her attraction. She feels like she is suppressed and that the guy has nothing else going on because they just wanna be with her (even tho guy had something going on - it's irrelevant because for her the only relevant thing is what she feels).

Now, she is a bit hard case scenario and really has a thing going on for "emotionally unavailable men" which she has stated in those exact words but at the same time she is really good example how women feel for too needy and pushy men.

I'm pretty much the only man she has been interested for months and not gotten that suppressed feeling (we dated 3 months until she demanded monogamy) - the joke is on her tho because I'm also the only one who hasn't promised her monogamy. She will be an interesting case study for me in months to come. She is a high value women with LTR properties so I wouldn't mind making her my girlfriend but I just can't do it if she demands monogamy.

[–]autofan884 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy

Doesn't really work. If I don't text, she won't reach me out. They always have another guy reaching them out if I don't.

[–]buttgoogler3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

TL;DR: Abundance, Frame, Push-pull.

[–]kaymaximus4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

This is a really good summary of How to be a 3% man by Corey Wayne. In my opinion, that book is the only thing you need to learn to get good game.

[–]YoloHambone3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

If you are on your purpose in life being rejected by a female is no big deal. Girls are to have fun with but being hurt by being rejected by them shows that you want to marry or LTR. Neither are very available these days.

Financial health, physical health and mental health are the things you need. Everything else is a byproduct.

[–]ChadMini2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Also stop talking about yourself. Get her talking about herself, so she is the one validating.

[–]NigroqueSimillima2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

By the 3rd date, THEY SHOULD BE THE ONES REACHING OUT TO YOU. If not, HARD NEXT. You don't want to be in a relationship with somebody that has low interest in you right?

This is dumb. Many girls are insecure, and won't reach out no matter how much they like you. They're programmed to think if a guy likes them he'll make the moves. Gaugue interest by how she responded to your text and how she treats you on a date.

Rest is pretty spot on, but be careful about being too withdrawal. Make a women too insecure and she'll self reject. If she's treating you right, you don't have to pretend like you barely like her after sex.

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

​Pretty solid stuff, but:


You shouldn't be trying to get a girlfriend. If you need or even want a girlfriend you are acting out of scarcity. You want a solution to your problem of sexual availability, and you've been conditioned to believe that the solution is to offer your commitment in the hope of receiving sexual favours.

This is an unattractive mindset to be in.

If you want sex (and you should), you should be aiming to fulfil that need without offering your commitment. Commitment is a fundamentally beta objective, hence offering it implies you are unattractive.

Girls know this shit instinctively. "Why is he going straight for the consolation prize? Why is he offering so much for so little? He must be low value".

Instead aim to get your needs met. Don't entertain the idea of commitment until you are complete and happy and satisfied. And when you get there you might think twice about entering into a fundamentally beta proposition.

[–]Soupses3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

This subreddit sucks now. Just regurgitation of information. Read the sidebar and the top posts then just unsub.

[–]ntkstudy441 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I think ur going a bit far w/ the texting part...texting is normal, I have never lost a girl's attraction by texting her. The only time that would work is if she's already extremely attracted to you.

[–]OneTrueQ1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Also vet relentlessly and believe/probe for red flags. Goes hand in hand with non neediness

[–]StingRayFins1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

The best way to get a girlfriend is to act like you care but don't actually care. If you really care you come off thirsty and desperate and they HATE that. But if you don't care too much they'll feel offended and ignore you to protect their own ego.

You want to care enough to make them feel like there's something special about them. People generally like people who like them. This keeps them interested and invested. Love and unconditional love and all that shit is nonsense.

It's all disguised and looks like that but it's all a means to boost your own ego.

[–]js10rc1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Solid advice.

Coach Corey Wayne and his book 'How to be a 3% man' has some great info on the subject of LTR.

And if you have neediness issues 'No more Mr nice guy' and 'Models'.

As you read through these books you can quickly analyse where you went wrong in your experience with women.

When reading any of these books more important than reading the material is applying it.

Failure is success in progress lads!

[–]spartanblood11 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

"What are We", "Are we dating", "Are you seeing other girls", by the 7th week of you doing this.

I got this question asked after 7 months ...

[–]TheFlyingPro2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

Did TRP reach some kind of ceiling? Don’t get me wrong: this one is not necessarily a bad post, but tbh I don’t see any value added in all the recent stuff that gets published on the sub.

[–]NYCMusicMarathon1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

As an older Red Pill adherent this is gold mine stuff.

If you've been doing everything right, she should be the one to say "What are We", "Are we dating", "Are you seeing other girls",

  • Let a woman work for her life with you.

  • She needs a trophy guy, be that guy.

  • Allow her to do her feminine work.

[–]zino1932 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Excellent post. I just wanna complement it with what is a date.

A date is time off from society between the woman and you. A date is fun, honest, cheeky. A date gradually grows the connection of your mind, bodies and sexual identity - and enables the rest of your lifes to fall into the background.

What starts with a touch of the hands or a punch in the shoulder evolves naturaly and smootly into you digging her out. Just keep that same energy going. Whether she pulls back, whether she passes on coming back to yours, taking of her shirt or refusing to take you up on your offer of a threesome.

You are with her to have fun, and you will have it. You will maintain that same cheeky playful but penetrating energy from minute one until the plate falls.

You are not there to negociate, you are not there to argue, hold her hand while she relives her sexual assault or her chat with Karen earlier in the day at the office.

You are there to have fun, and nudge towards sexual release for both of you. She can stop, she can doubt, she can complain - but the energy is only going one way. You will stop, you will listen and you will understand - but your energy will not change. She can flake, she can ghost for 3 weeks or disapear for 3 years - you do not change your tone, your mood or your intent. You are a slip-and-slide to sexy time. She may not want it today, next month or while she is still in a relationship - but she knows, that you are the one that she can call if she wants the easy life, the careless chad experience where nothing matters and she always gets a good dicking at the end of the date.

Women have choice, use that. Just how she chooses to sap to cry late at night with, or the daddy that pays for her vacation, she choose men she calls when she is bored and horny. Don't worry about her needs, wants and sorrows. She has other dudes to handle that, you need to be the guy she calls because she knows he can reliably deliver the dick.

Having this attitude, being "that guy". Will make flacking irrelevant because after you date and prime 12-20 women that you are "that guy". There won't be a week, where you can't set something up with someone from the past.

It may not be Cherryl, or that cute little tease from the parking lot you don't aproach because she said that one time you're old - but if you cast your "that guy" identity wide enough, there will always be some girl "in town for just one night needing a place to crash", a "birtday girl bored of her party", a "just broken up with my bastard boyfriend" or a "kids are with him tonight" milf.

Fuckbois, and big dick energy aren't just jokes. Women have choice, stop worrying about what women want and just be what they need maybe once a year when she starts thinking about Tinder.

[–]Rta802 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Why would you want a gf? Keep things light and casual.

[–]dopexile1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

How to get a girlfriend in the modern age of social media:

1) Have attractive looks

2) Don't be unattractive

[–]Aspiringbucket2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Brother you could be Brad Pitt but if you're needy, weak, clingy, emotional and overall a bitch boy you're not even going to land a 6/10

[–]zino1931 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Only guys that fear owning up to their sexuality think like this.

Yes, girls will hit on you if you look good. And that's where it ends.

Everything else is the same blue pill bullshit. Entertaining her, begging for the puss or holding her purse. Looking good does not compensate for mental game.

What it does though is give you the right mindset. You know there's another right around the corner, you know she wants to get dicked down. You know she will scamper back to you with fucking enthusiasm after she hears that girl Becky was withing 3 ft of you at a party.

But all that, all that mindset that keeps them investing and makes them fall for you - all that can be done by just playing the field, spinning plates and not falling for the first girl that holds your hand.

That's true male maturity. Acceptance of female nature and going with it while getting yours.

[–]classicliberal10 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

TLDR: Play hard to get.

Fonzie taught me that when I was five.

[–]Masupilamii0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

That Sounds like corey wayne advice - Great guy imo

[–]fake_account_1010 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

in short , be a cat , not a dog

[–]Vancopime0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I feel like this is one of the most simple, no bullshit advice given. I like it. There is a reason they say keep it simple! Stupid!

[–]redpillthrowaway19880 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

this feels like you just copied and pasted what other gurus have been preaching for years.

[–]silent_dominant0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

My brother is 35 and wants to start a family. His last go at a girl he did exactly the opposite of what you described here. and even boasted about how "they were texting all the time so things are going well". After 2-3 dates (where he cooked for her and all that shit, but didn't even come close to kissing her) HE asked HER the "what are we?" question.

Naturally, the girl ghosted him

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Well duh. They didn't have sex or even kissed. That's pretty poor counter example

[–]silent_dominant0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

It isn't a counter example. I am agreeing with the OP...

[–]Infernir0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You're not gonna see members of the opposite sex here complaining on Reddit lol \thinks about all the guys scared shitless of cold approaching women outside**

[–]linkofinsanity190 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I read Corey a lot before finding TRP and it helped as much as as it could be have. However, Once I found The Red Pill, I literally threw his book away. He is Purple Pill at best, bit I think the guy's got good intentions. Funny enough, I could tell long before the last line that you had read 3% Man.

I think you did a great job putting a more RP spin on his principles so I'll give it my upvote, but I think his book is a bit remedial for anyone who's read the sidebar and/or the Rational Male.

[–]davidscream0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

But if you want to reach a girlfriend at this fucked up times you should first training your mind. Some of these steps are very hard to develop.

[–]thestallone1230 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

perfect topic, i had lots of energy female

[–][deleted]  (2 children) | Copy


[–]Aspiringbucket0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

You would prefer if your BOYFRIEND texts you all the time.

However, when some guy you just met blows up your phone you're going to think this guy is a stage 5 clinger and get rid of him ASAP.

This guide is directed for males in the DATING/Getting to know somebody stage.

When you're in a relationship, feel free to text your girlfriend and let them receive your love. However, doing this when you're getting to know somebody is an automatic ghosting

[–]throwaway_1792920 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

No, even when I just start talking to someone I like the constant contact. My ex and I actually started talking 24/7 almost right after we met. I met him coming out of an abusive relationship and him constantly being in touch and showing he cared made me feel a lot better. I don't mind if a guy is "clingy", I'd rather him be himself if that means texting a lot.

[–]slickzamsterdam0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Alpha male strategies gonna file a copyright claim on you 😂

[–]Aspiringbucket0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Doesn’t matter, this is universal it isn’t an original idea. Guys before all these coaches were doing it

[–]Lord_Rey0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Fuck, I should have read this two weeks ago. I had a great first date but couldn't hide my interest. I even caught OneItIs actually and of course, you guest it, she lost interest and finally ghosted me. Thanks for this post, lesson learned.

[–]darkstar1031-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Man, I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one.

What's with this oneitis you got going there. I get the feeling you're a highschool junior who just got Suzy to deep throat for the first time.

Gonna blow your fucking little mind the first time you bed down two cheerleaders at the same time.

[–]GrooveDive0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Why do we keep getting posts like this? This brings nothing new to the table, we've got the sidebar. This is like going to church and hearing the same message over and over; when you get the message, hang up. It's up to us to study and drill in the theory, we don't need the same points fed to us in these posts.

[–]rpleo-2 points-1 points  (2 children) | Copy

Is this the REDPILL?

Stop this kinda posts

[–]zino1931 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yeah, unlike the complaining posts about women, society, MGTOW, this is actually the red pill.

[–]_Ulan_3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Step 1 : Don't aim for a relationship

[–]iammrmosely-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy

Why would the goal be to have a girlfriend?? Even the concept of wanting a girlfriend is blue pill asf!

[–]Aspiringbucket2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

"Falling" for an 8 whose good fun/likes you is natural and normal.

Show me a guy who says 'onetisis is for the weak' or 'just get more leads' and I'll show you a guy who dates 5s and 6s.

What's the point of chasing unknown 7s and lottery ticket 8s when you have the latter?

[–]Kernel_Turtle-1 points0 points  (3 children) | Copy

Escalate to sex? How about get married first. This is not redpilling

[–]Shieldless_One0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

Lol you must be new the theredpill, marriage is a bad deal.

[–]Kernel_Turtle2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

It's a bad deal if you start dating whores for sex like this guy

[–]Shieldless_One0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Its a bad deal all around no matter who you married when your wife can get a divorce at the drop of a hat and own half of your belongings.

And who said OP was dating whores? Newsflash everybody dates to have sex.

[–]JohnQData-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

I fucked up with a girl that was interested in me because I texted her too much. This post is gold. I'm so tired of trying to meet women through texting, my next girlfriend I want to meet her in person first.

[–]rockyp32-2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy

I get really down sometime s it honestly thinking back it’s legit all mental maturation shit comes naturally if it’s meant to be it never goes as bad as u thonk

[–]no_regret20-2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy

Why a man with many options (pussy) would be worried about finding the right girl to make her his girlfriend??? This post is BS

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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