I am a bi woman who leans towards women maybe 90% same sex attraction and 10% or less attraction to the opposite sex. Ive only ever been with women because i have just found more women attractive and the times i did find a guy online ok i could never make it pass the first date as my expectations were higher and there was an element of pushed boundaries and disrespect. They always revealed themselves as LVM with little desire to listen to my boundaries and standards. It isn't perfect with all women. Dating a HVF is much better then dating a LVF or pickmeisha but at least there was not this obvious disrespect towards my boundaries or pushing of boundaries. I was thinking I might try dating a male again so i can tick it off my bucket list but seems there are few males who seem to understand boundaries and not be pushy towards sex. I have always had this standard of no sex until there is commitment or marriage as i am of indian background. Id rather have premarital sex with women as it is lower risk, less consequences then risk being with a scrote.
http://www.betterloverseminar.com/newsletters/areyouagoodlover.php

An example is this quiz found on a website which teaches sex education to guys in developing countries. Its actually quite good. I learnt a few things about female desire and sexuality. I have sent it to gfs and they have been interested to learn things whereas LVM guys seem to think they know everything and are not open to learning or feedback. When i went through this checklist i notice a lot of guys don't do this whereas women are more open to it. A guy who is not open to learning from feedback or self improvement in all fields especially making his partner feel comfortable, safe and feel like she is in a non judgemental environment. whenever i told a guy about my past experiences with women there was this insecurity and inability to match up. Ive never even kissed a guy and i don't know if i want to. My previous relationship with a woman broke up due to long distance (she lived overseas) and because i was not sure if i wanted to try out my attractions to men. We talked for many months online before we met. She moved to my country by taking leave from work for a few months to help me as i had moved to this small town for work. She never complained about having to spend 3 months of her leave in a dead end town. We tried going on weekend road trips. We helped out equally in the household as i was working a busy job as a doctor in hospital she helped pack my lunch, and we helped each other with breakfast and dinner. She used to write love notes in my lunchbox. She got me cute gifts like a personalised tv shirt , a personalised story book with us as characters and i got her soft toys, pandora bracelets and rings. We never kept count or held score over it.

As she didn't have a car to drive she would use public transport to bring my favourite food to work, she came to work and surprised me with flowers, bday cake and a gift. Even though she didn't drink she learnt how to make pina coladas for me. We were both a first relationship for each other. She never made me feel uncomfortable physically and we took our time discovering each other. She made music videos of our photos together and helped me make bday videos for my family. She got gifts for my family and i got the same for her when i visited her home. We used to get gifts for each other and surprise each other. No one would keep score. Cooking for each other was a gesture of love. We shared self/couple improvement tips including tips on communication. Even though we had some small disagreements we resolved them amicably. We had a vision to one day adopt children or to start a non profit for women in developed countries.

Unfortunately we lived in different continents and the situation made it difficult to continue but we left with good memories. We also unfortunately got gay and racism bashed by an indigenous lady who saw us walking down a street holding hands and called us F** and asked us to go back to our country. She physically punched us and my ex sustained a permanent fracture. She never guilted me and said it was worth it if she got to spend time with me. When i was sick she would run around and make sure i had medications i needed, that i was rested and i did not have to worry about anything. As we were closeted we couldn't tell many people but we did make a police report. Im a doctor and she worked in mental health so we were easily able to talk about anything and despite the time difference we used to make time to chat every day. She would always encourage me and motivate me when we were together. Even when we were long distance she used to send me poems, profess love to me alone and we both never strayed. Just waited for the day we would meet in real life.

I realised that when a woman really loves you like loves you unconditionally her love is kind, patient, nurturing, sweet, generous and unconditional. She will climb mountains for you, tread through heavy water for you. She will be there for you no matter what you have done, listen to you till you have no more words to talk, encourage you when the whole world is against you and you are at rock bottom, she will be there when you're sick giving her comfort of her presence and arms and be there for you to cheer you up no matter how long it takes. That is what i had.
Id like to find and give that type of unconditional love again. For that i need to find a HVF. And i don't think most guys can provide such unconditonal love but maybe im mistaken and experienced FDSers can tell me otherwise.
I don't think realistically such a love is possible for many males and finding that elusive male when i am more attracted to women may not be worth it. I came out to my family as bi but said i was more into women.

Im seriously considering just sticking with women and if I want a family finding a single woman with kids or creating my own family with the help of HVM gay friends etc in the mean time i have my work as a doctor to keep me busy and I am in the process of setting up a non profit for womens issues in developing countries.

These things in the above quiz seem to be rare but i think it should be the bare minimum in a sexual relationship that anyone who cares for their partner needs to do. Make sure she is comfortable, check her consent, check her boundaries, know non sexual forms of touch, realise that if she is not in the mood there may be reasons behind it and to work on it. Put her pleasure and orgasms first. Im looking at this and it just seems like this should be the basic minimum. If a woman isn't in the mood for sex it should not be imposed instead her partner should understand why she may not want to have it. She could be stressed, feel like she is being taken for granted, feeling that she is not understood, lack of trust, life incidents, past trauma or sexual shame, body confidence, comfort level with her partner, excess focus on outcome of sex instead of making her feel comfortable, health issues or she could not just want it right now and thats fine too.

Why should anyone want to have sex with someone when she is not ready or doesn't want to? Instead her partner should spend that time taking care of her, appreciating her and giving other affection. Instead maybe work on making her feel special, appreciate her, compliment her, do something thoughtful for her so she feels desired and attractive. Little things like eye contact, being mindful in the present moment, be creative, flirt with her, build sexual tension and anticipation, tease her in a positive way. Find how she likes foreplay and listen to the feedback she gives.
I think for a guy to do the above is something they should want to learn for the pleasure of their partner. Learning how to be romantic specifically for her, knowing the love language of his partner should be something he should want to do. Women get turned on differently to men and they need something holistic focused on their entire body and senses not just genitals. They need sensual appreciation and appreciation of all senses, not just touch, they need someone who makes them comfortable and is playful, someone who understands that there is a reason why women are more interested in erotica, someone who appreciates her in words and communicates that. This should be just the beginning level of understanding.
A relationship is like a job and needs constant work by both parties not one usually the woman. Its not like i did one thoughtful thing for her three years ago on her anniversary so i don't need to do anything again. Women always try to encourage their partners maybe they should also try doing something to appreciate their partner every day. Research shows long lasting high value relationship should be based on wanting to learn about your partner, appreciating them, turning towards them, listening to what they have to say and letting them influence you, working through problems and realising some may be unsolveable and having shared meaning.
https://psychcentral.com/blog/7-research-based-principles-for-making-marriage-work/
A guy can very easily read and learn about female anatomy, different erogenous zones and how to touch each of them including the non obvious ones, clitoral/g spot orgasms etc and be able to ask his partner what she likes and how she likes it. Or he can ask her. Why should it be an ego issue? Not doing so is serious low effort and shows lack of initiative, self improvement and growth. We become like the 5 people we interact with most and if your partner is going to be a barrier in your life goals and ambitions instead of supportive he will drag you down rather then uplift you. This can impact your mental, emotional and physical health later on.

I just think there needs to be higher standards for men (or any partner) when it comes to being a better lover. If they don't know they can be pointed to resources and they should be enthusiastic to learn and not be dismissive.