Agree and amplify: why it is such an important tool

Women and socially acceptable opinions

On any given subject, society allows for a spectrum of opinions, usually between polarizing and extreme limits. Usually, if your opinion is beyond one of these limits, it will be rejected by the hive.

For example, for the current hivemind:

making fun of short guys: ok

making fun of midgets: not ok

So regarding height, we can say that one limit of the spectrum is right there between short and midget. Women won’t go beyond that.

Girls completely live and navigate within those social cues, this spectrum. Their way of communicating is a constant, cautious attempt to establish what the common ground is with others. They wanna know where the hive stands on any subject. Because a woman doesn’t have fixed boundaries, she continuously lives in this spectrum defined by both society (what the majority of society tells her is acceptable through the media, interactions, etc) and circumstances (what she can get away with right now). This spectrum is basically her whole universe.

Is it cool/acceptable to make fun of midgets? How will people look at me if I do it? That’s all that matters to them. Not whether the joke is funny or not.

On the contrary, masculine men usually tend to speak their mind, without thinking about consequences. When consequences are bad, you are labelled an “asshole”. ‘Yeah maybe my midget joke was inconsiderate, but whatever..’ Women love assholes because of their freedom. In comparison, women are slaves to the collective hivemind, and they hate it. They have to be constantly cautious. Throughout history, you can find many talented or smart women, but rarely do they go against the accepted spectrum of opinions. All rebellions, all groundbreaking ideas come from men, because men care more about finding their own truth than being accepted by the hive (at least masculine men). It’s also why it’s hard to find funny women: because they don’t dare go beyond the approved spectrum. They’re wired to do the opposite, to stay within.

Responding to a tease with agree and amplify

When somebody comes at you with a joke or a tease, it’s their way of saying: “see this social boundary where our interactions are nice and acceptable, I’m gonna go over it and pinch you a little to see what you are made of”. They go to one limit of the spectrum, and tease you there.

Girls do this all the time, although they’re not really imaginative when it comes to it. Typically, it’s gonna be something like “you’re short”, “you’re skinny”, “you’re fat”, “you’re old” (that’s the one I get), “you’re a loser”, etc. They choose words that can hurt you, on purpose (if not what’s the point), not because they’re necessarily true.

Agree and amplify is your way of responding “I see your ridiculous little tease and I raise it tenfold. You’re not even close to touching my boundaries, the ground where I stand firm is way too large for you to cover”. It’s basically a declaration of a bigger frame.

Agree and amplify is especially efficient because, instead of going in the opposite direction, which gives a polarizing power to her tease, you go in the same direction which leaves it in the middle of the spectrum, mediocre and useless. For example if she says ‘you’re short’, if you respond with ‘no I’m not I’m actually average height blabla’ you go in the opposite direction and you give value to what she said. You acknowledge that she found a limit where you’re uncomfortable. If you respond with ‘yeah I used to work in a circus as a midget, this is how I paid for college’ you’re going in the same direction and now her tease seems lost in the middle. Being short has lost all its negative power.

So agree and amplify shows her that not only are you not affected by this poke, you’re comfortable going way further than that. It also gives her tingles.

Tldr:

When she shit-tests you, she does it by teasing you at the boundaries of her spectrum. When you agree and amplify, you push these boundaries. This literally expands her sense of reality, it establishes your frame over hers. You establish that you’re solid and more comfortable than her on a wider range of the spectrum.