Older players (late 40s/50s & up), tell us what you would do differently if you could go back 20 years looking through the RP lens.

Stormhammer · 2015-01-07T04:55:32+00:00

[permanently deleted]

MachoNinja · 2015-01-07T05:35:57+00:00

I was good with Money however I would of liked to have done a bit better.

I purchased my house at 22 and I still live in it, it was paid off in right around 16 years. No matter what happens i will always have this house.

Stay away from Women, Beer and Cars. By this I mean don't jump into relationships, you will be shocked how much your views will change by 35. There is nothing wrong with having a drink or two, but bars and clubs are cash toilets, and you will gain nothing later in life by drinking yourself retarded in your 20's. By a car with a great long term rating and drive it for 10 years minimum.

I wish i had stayed in better shape, I found as I got older the better i took care of myself the better i handled life. When you feel good you do good.

Stay away from people that can not take care of their own life, it may break your heart to turn your back on an old friend, but if they are dragging you down you need to get out. Look out for #1.

Buy Tools as you need them, and lend them out as needed, if at any point someone doesn't return a tool, cut them off. There is no room in life for people that would not return something you loaned them.

Dont lend Money, if you have some spare cash, just gift it and call it a day, if you have chosen your friends well, giving a buddy in need a few notes will result in a buddy that shows up at 6am 3 years later to help you build a deck, or at 2 am with a wrench to help fix a broken water heater.

Read more, it really helps your vocabulary. The ability to articulate and retain information is a skill many have not developed.

Learn to cook, my weakness in my 20's and 30's was eating out, the cash I dropped on meals over those 20 years could of paid for a very nice cabin.

Stay out of the snatch trap, young women will use sex to get you to do things you normally wouldn't, Don't let a broad dictate your life.
Women will also use emotion as a tool to build a relationship, treat dating like a chess match, stay 2 or 3 moves ahead and remember that you are dealing with a completely different animal.

At 42 I have known at least 2 dozen men that got caught up in the relationship game on a Tuesday night, and woke up 10 years later in hell. Do not sacrifice your mental well being for a taste of the fairer sex.

Last but certainly not least, do not under any circumstance, ever answer a question like this after 6 fingers of Bourbon.

RedPope · 2015-01-07T02:57:17+00:00

I wouldn't have had kids.

I wouldn't have "respected" the women I did by not "taking advantage of the situation". In other words, when I had the opportunity to have sex with a woman I wanted to have sex with I would have. Every single time I did not it destroyed whatever relationship I though we had. Most of the time the consequenses of not doing the deed were more fucked up than if I had just helped her cheat.

I wouldn't have hesitated to kiss the girl. Ever. I'd just be forward with my desires. Get the fear of rejection out of the way immediately instead of "waiting for the right moment".

I should have realized sooner that no one wants to be my mother. Fuck sharing your feelings. No one wants to hear your insecurities and coddle you. They only want to hear your GOOD feelings. Anything else alienates you and makes your emotional state worse.

In retrospect, I didn't need anyone in my life except myself. Being alone is awesome and optimal. There is more sex, more money and more freedom in being alone.

Marriage is for chumps. Don't get married unless she is substantially richer than you, and then only do so if you can handle the long game. There is nothing good about being married. Seriously.

"Alpha" traits aren't just about getting chicks. Success in all walks of life come from them. You make a hell of a lot more money being "Alpha".

Trust no one. Nobody has your back. No body. Sure, there are great people out there who are awesome to hang out with, but the only one responsible for you is you.

Stay fit and lift. And for the love of all that is holy, STRETCH. Life sucks ass when you start to stiffen up, and no matter how tough you are, your body starts to just fucking seize up eventually if you aren't stretching. I think if I went back in time I'd get into yoga in my 20's and do it once a week religiously.

Social dynamics beats hard work any day. It is better to have drinks with the boss than stay late at the office. Hard work gets little respect. Politics is the only thing that matters. The popular kids in high school were right all along.

Dress well. There is no easier way to place yourself at the top of the pecking order in normal society, and being at the top has massive advantages.

Kids aren't worth it. If you like kids, then coach a sports team or visit your friends and play with their kids. Kids are fucking hard work and they don't appreciate it until they have kids of their own. Never will you have to slave so hard for freindship.

BRENDORVEGAS · 2015-01-07T07:30:19+00:00

This needs to be a semi-annual post.

TeamSatan · 2015-01-07T07:48:10+00:00

50 next week.

My best friend died of cancer at 18. This made me realise that our time here is short. Stay positive, work hard, have zero tolerance for idiots that make your life difficult. Learn to read people. People that prove themselves as honest and reliable keep them in your life. Never give anyone who crosses you a second chance.

Know yourself...if you are strong and can enjoy challenges then get married have kids, for me it is fantastic. Women and money will come and go accept that. Always try to be happy..Being a grumpy prick is no way to live life. Most important is to be physically strong. Image is important and looking and feeling strong as a man gives you many oppurtunities in all areas of life. Be kind, be fair, be happy.

sir_wankalot_here · 2015-01-07T06:05:29+00:00

Learned about marketing. That what people think you are doing is more important then what you actually are doing. Also learned that to make money you have to sell people things, what you sell them doean't matter as long as it is profitable and legal.

Also I woupd have ditched most of my morality a lot earlier on.

apackofwankers · 2015-01-07T11:13:50+00:00

50 year old here.

The biological function of women is to rear children, the biological function of men is to support women and children.

You are more than your biology dictates. Don't get married, and don't have children. You don't need them, they need you. Find a greater purpose in life than reproducing.

You MUST Read "The Manipulated Man"

Never ever discuss your finances with anyone, especially women. Any women in your life should be completely in the dark about how much you earn and how much you have in the bank. Get a PO Box for mail from banks, and delete any bank statements that are emailed to you. Some women are natural interrogators - its best to prepare a story is advance for such women. Have a friend interrogate you so you can practise telling your story under duress. The objective here is that you don't want women who are interested in your money making potential. Such women are worth nothing to you, unless you are a cold fish who can identify them quickly and pump-and-dump them.

You should think of women as moles (like spies). All information given to them should be on a need to know basis only. Information is like money - ask yourself what you are getting in return for any given price of information. Do not share freely.

If you have a business, structure it such that it is an offshore trust. Have the trust own everything, your house, your car, etc. The trust can provide your woman with a car, if necessary.

If you ignore the advice on not getting married, get a pre-nup. The best time to discuss that is in the context of wedding vows. "Honey, we need to talk about the wedding vows and the pre-nup"

fastball21 · 2015-01-07T04:52:20+00:00

If I were talking to a 20 year old me:

– skip college.

– get a low-level, high risk job, such as an oil field or oil rig, seaman on a freight ship... the pay is better than minimum wage but the company houses and feeds you. There's no where to spend your money, and usually it's an all male setting so conversations go unrestrained. Don't blow your wages out of boredom on poker like some do, bring books to read. In two years you can save more than most with a college degree will have by the time they're 30. You can learn a trade on site and move up if you wish, the opposite of college as they pay you to learn.

– take those savings, buy a house you can afford and move into the basement, renting out the main/2nd floor. After five years of others paying down your mortgage, buy a second house to rent out.

– self educate by reading and doing yourself. You can get college degrees free with online courses. The internet is like having the library of Alexandria in your living room. Everything about everything is now available to those who seek and wish to learn, the only cost is your time. Google "the library of Alexandria" or whatever should people reference things you don't understand. Self educate as much as possible.

– don't smoke, take care of your body. Learn half a dozen exercises you can do anywhere without gym equipment.

– learn one self defence system... best would be boxing... most things start with throwing fists, get that part down first. Just six months in a boxing club will teach you more than what's known by 95% of the population.

– observe, observe, observe. The truth is always available to those who pay attention, no matter what subject and setting. Learn to recognize the truth when you see it, this becomes easier when the truth is your goal. Learn to trust your intuition/gut feelings... this is your higher consciousness giving you an elbow in the ribs. It knows what it's doing and is never wrong.

– you are the most important person in your life. do what you want, do what you're interested in doing, do what best serves your long term needs and interests. do this without hurting others... by this I mean no lying, stealing, killing, destroying. You will hurt other people's feelings and they will hurt yours... c'est la vie, this is inevitable. Do not relinquish control of your life in order to placate someone else's feelings, you will end up with nothing. You can't change the world, but change yourself and the world changes with you. Take care of yourself first, always.

– learn the complete lyrics to one song you like, and sing it for yourself in the shower.

– the means are the end

– remain curious, the world and universe are far deeper and more beautiful than you can imagine. the RP of gender relations is not the only RP that exists... it's one of many pills, and others are far larger in size.

– everything I've said here is important to me, none of it may be important to you. I'm only a street sign, you decide which direction you wish to follow.

alphbux · 2015-01-07T08:08:14+00:00

Vasectomy.... Best choice I ever made. At this point I don't even disclose it. One day a chick is going to tell me shes pregnant and bam I'll be able to play the im sterile it's not mine card.

GayLubeOil · 2015-01-07T03:38:29+00:00

I really appreciate this discussion. The systematic destruction of male spaces has robbed younger men of this opportunity.

RedPillSafe · 2015-01-07T03:04:09+00:00

I'm 53.

First you have to think of the Austin Powers movies.

Back in the 1970's it really was "Free Love". Back then Feminism had not had much influence yet and having random sex was considered a thing to do just for the heck of it.

By the 1990's the "Players" started to get "richer" and the ordinary guy got "poorer" in the sexual selection sense.

So before the 1990's the 20/80 rule didn't really exist yet.

You could be a sort of hippie nerd and go to a Grateful Dead concert and drop acid and the girls were equally as drugged up and anything could happen.

When the Feminists finally convinced the women to only ride the carousel with just the top 20% that's when things got harder. Later the younger guys who had missed the "Free Love" days started getting older without success and so it's actually harder on young men now than on the older crowd.

One difference is that in the older times there were still some people faithful to the older Patriarchy even though all the laws changed already. So overall things were better as far as female quality.

I state the obvious that female quality has continued downhill. Hardcore slutty behavior was unusual back in the 1970's and 1980's as there was still an agreement that monogamy was the rule even though technically the Patriarchy was already gone.

Red Pill is very important for young people today because you are the most abused by the new situation if you are brainwashed into this Blue Pill stuff.

At least us old folks have all had plenty of sex in the past.

Over those years I do remember on occasion a really "shit testing" Feminist popping up here and there, but I didn't understand until now how it was part of an overall Cultural Marxism and not just a few nasty females.

So you could feel something was changing, but before Red Pill I didn't have the depth to understand exactly what the underlying cause was.

abdada · 2015-01-07T04:46:46+00:00

40 year old for another few months here. Divorced once, very short, fast marriage with a woman who was 2+ points higher on the SMV scale during the marriage, and is now 5 points lower.

Start your business before graduating high school. Yes, you can incorporate. I incorporated my first business in my teens in the late 80s. Just do it. Start a business bank account.
Never fuck up your credit score. Ever. You don't need anything that you can't afford to pay off next month.
Never cosign a loan for anyone. Not family, not friends, not your wife.
Never tell anyone how much you earn, how much money you have in the bank, or where you bank. Tape a piece of vinyl across your credit or debit card so no one knows.
If she means something to you, call her by her first name and make her call you by your first name. Don't accept "honey" or "sweetie" or "baby" from a woman (who supposedly loves you) more than she uses your first name.
If you want to try something in bed and she says no to it, bail. She's done it before, and she did it with a guy who is higher SMV than you are. Even if she hates it, a woman who loves you will try it once and then say she doesn't really like it, rather than just say no.
It is better to ask forgiveness than be denied permission in all things in life.
Don't be ashamed of your shortcomings. Chances are, you share them with 20% of the world, and chances are that 5% of those are massively wealthy and will hire your services knowing you're not ashamed of them. For example, Google Jimmy Au.
If it's a flat open surface, it should be bare. Desks, floors, nightstands, tops of TVs. If it's a flat hidden surface, there should only be one item on the surface. Drawers, cabinets, closets. If you need to stack things, you have too much stuff. If you need to clutter open surfaces, you have too much stuff.
Go to a tailor for 1/2 your clothing budget. If your tailored clothes stop fitting, you're getting fat. Stop that.

2015-01-07T09:30:44+00:00

40 y/o mulatto

What I was told to do: Fuck bitches, get money.

I was too busy fucking bitches or trying to please them, never made much money...would take days off for a nice piece of ass. If I had known better I would have worked my ass off for money because I would have had access to better bitches. Women are attracted to looks and power. AF/BB(that's the secret of the beta; general financial power from lack of other assets, and a limited supply of alpha males, makes an alpha female available to them).

I was young, beautiful, and broke. Sure I had women. They weren't worthy of me, and I wasnt worthy of myself. Make your money! Most issues people have living through TRP is asset-less living. You can hire a trainer. You can have plastic surgery. You can have the education, the travel, all of it...if you can pay.

Zorc_the_Pork · 2015-01-07T19:49:59+00:00

I am late 40's

Different:

Rock Climbed a bit more in my 20's, back when I could still do 30 chin-ups, and hike in/out ten miles without thinking about it.
Been a bit more selective in what I did in college. I did a Div 1 sport, STEM major, Fraternity, and Rock Climbed. In retrospect I would have cut out the fraternity, I had a great time partying, but now I only hang out with a few of these people from the Frat, and I have never gotten any business contacts or job opportunities out of my Fraternity. In fact many of them were pretty rude to me in my 20's. Now that I am pretty darn successful they are hovering around me and trying to re-establish contact.
I would have NEVER moved in with an LTR. It just doesn't work for me, I like a lot of "alone time" and space. I love being able to hang out after the gym and read, not to have to entertain anyone. Not to have to talk about her day at work, and all of her "check this out" conversations. When I go over to her space, or she to mine, then we can have those types of conversations. 3-4 days per week with LTRs seems to be the sweet spot with me, enough to keep the nuts empty but not enough to bore me.
Most LTRs will try to beta-fy you. I lost a great LTR in my early 30's because I let myself go beta. See my next comment as to why - she claimed she "liked me big".
I had a traveling sales job for around six years in my early 30's. I would have been much more disciplined with my diet and exercise. I gained 8 pounds / year during that job, I ended up chubby with a lot of muscle, but most of that mass was fat.
I wish I studied more programing / database structures. Those jobs are everywhere around here. I know two people who work for a major NAMED firm and make even more than I do, and they are younger.

Same:

Never get married.
Have kids out-of-wedlock.
Support those kids, set up college funds (yay 'Murica!)
STEM fields rock, I make around $175,000 now. In fact, I could have easily have done my job ten year's ago, but many employers still think experience is better than ability and talent. But the Baby Boomers are starting to retire, so our time to make money is here gang.
Traveled extensively after college. I got paid by the Government to travel in my 20's.
Gone on an exchange program during college. The cost at my school was the same - except for the plane ticket. It was a great deal.
Worked summer jobs in / around your college town. Take the hard-to-get or difficult college classes during summer. Take two - three classes with as close to a full time job as possible. Rent is WAY cheaper during summer, and you will build independence being away from home / family. I did this every summer except my first during school. These summer courses also helped my to do my Div 1 sport/ keep my GPA up.
Keep fit. Obviously. Body + $$ speaks volumes in your 40's.

I have to disagree with some of the posters / commenters that are around my age.

My old man told me back in my 20's to be patient with women. Find the right one to settle down with. He told me to wait until at least 35. He then told me his "secret". Guy's sex lives are vastly better in their late 30's and 40's if their SMV is high. Women are desperate once they hit their early 30's. Play the game, say the right things, and in my old man's words words - get three different women to let you CIM in one day, just for giggles, and seeing who is the champ.

GETTING LAID IN YOUR 40's is WAY easier than even college! I was a Div 1 sport guy, in a Frat in college, and I did fine! I will admit I struggled a bit in my late 20's, early 30's - but mostly because I was in LTR's and refused to let girls lock me down. But your 40's - IF YOU ARE FIT / high SMV - is off the chain! People are trying to constantly "set me up with a good girl" and "trying to get me hitched". Play the game and you will be hip deep in it! I have dated so many girls 28 - 40, it is not even funny. Girls are so desperate it is like shooting fish in a barrel. Just keep that stick wrapped or get your vasectomy. It probably helps that I like in a major metropolitan area, but my old man did it and he lived in the suburbs. You can afford to be SO CHOOSEY in your 40's. Only date women who you are attracted to or interest you. NEXT the rest of them. In fact, being choosey just boosts your SMV. But be smart, don't fish off the company pier, no matter how tempting it is. I love them girls.

Just two months ago I had an Asian male friend offer me an arranged marriage with a 30 year old Asian engineer, virgin, who needs a green card to stay in America. She is tall, fair (Northern Chinese), decent body and face, speaks three languages (Cantonese, German, English), and makes six figures. Great marriage potential. For marriage I'd give her an 8. I was really tempted. But then I thought about it - I already have kids. My SMV is higher than when I was in college. What am I going to gain from wifeing her? It is ALL upside for her, all downside me. A guy at work just got worked over in an arranged marriage, his forth by-the-way.

Stay single.

Whisper · 2015-01-07T06:41:22+00:00

Change:

More direct and aggressive with women.
Less polite and more confrontational in general.
Lift more earlier.
Steroids earlier.
No stupid high-rep bodybuilder lifts for small muscles. Squats, deads, bench, press, pullups.
Engineering major earlier.
Sever all contact with fucked up abusive parents earlier.
Less student loans if possible.
Dating smart women is okay. Dating women who pride themselves on their intelligence, bad move.
Dump any woman who won't swallow.
Assemble a cadre of male friends who have your back.
Don't be too open with people. Don't tell people things about yourself just because they are true. If it doesn't make you look good, shut up about it.

Keep:

Don't get married.
Don't have kids.
Don't fuck crazy or stupid. No, not even if she is that fucking hot.
Don't buy into religion. They want you obedient. They do not have your best interests at heart.
$$$ major (engineering/math/medicine/law) or no college. Pick one.
Always bail on a relationship if the sex slows down. This is a sign of things to come.
Never bankroll a woman. A gift, repeated, becomes an obligation.
Ditch any friend who will sell you out to please his woman.
Don't let yourself cry. If you have to cry, do it behind a locked door and keep that shit to yourself. It will never, ever bring you any good if you are over the age of eight or so.
When shopping for an LTR, it's easier to turn a 6/goodgirl into an 8/goodgirl than it is to turn an 8/ho into an 8/goodgirl.
If she'll cheat with you, she'll cheat on you.

blackyisthedog · 2015-01-07T04:35:57+00:00

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Shmoopernator · 2015-01-07T08:14:40+00:00

Starting a business is something that's come up several times on the this thread. Any tips or information on how to start one and such?? Much appreciated

Padre55 · 2015-01-07T03:01:19+00:00

Not quite "there" will say this..

There is a lot, and I do mean a lot, of fun/sex/money to be had in this world. Seriously, it is right there.

The key is..do not lose yourself once Ms HDB 11 shows up, be all about your business. A 6 am workout is your life, then always always do that 6 am workout..period. Enjoy the journey of course, just make sure your life is YOUR life.

Want to code and not workout? Great, make sure nothing distracts from that pursuit of mastery of coding, or what have you.

At the end of the day, you are accountable to one person..yourself..in this world. Never forget that for an instant.

martypete · 2015-01-07T04:47:10+00:00

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fresno500 · 2015-01-07T09:27:16+00:00

currently 59. would not get married, get a vasectomy at 18 and get a phd instead on BS in computer science. and without a doubt MGTOW and would enjoy my life and travel extensively.

JakofClubs · 2015-01-07T16:56:15+00:00

I'd add:

Make sure your credits are going to transfer if you plan on switching schools.
Most liberal arts degrees aren't worth it economically and unless you can get a free ride, you'd be better off going into the trades. Liberal arts degrees make you a better, well rounded person, but you can do that by reading.

scarletspider3 · 2015-01-07T17:12:57+00:00

spend less time/energy chasing bitches and more time/energy chasing money

svchator · 2015-01-07T09:23:55+00:00

56yr here - married / kids. Lifelong RP, but we didn't have a name for it back then. High school / college - many girls. I led companies and was in the trade press. For attracting women - a golden ticket - more than I wanted. Now I'm old but still in great shape. Last man standing - another golden ticket.

My marriage - ups and downs - bitterness and acceptance. I would not have wanted to miss marriage and kids - even the bitter parts. I know people who went without kids, or have perfect but sterile lives. Some messiness is good - take the pain.

I have no game, but lots of women. They are important.

Then again - the women come and go. There is a certain beauty to the ebb and flow.

Advice #1 - abide with ESL women mostly. MiddleEast, Asia, South America, Eastern Europe - green flag. US / UK / Scandanavia - red flag.

Advice #2 - invest yourself in family and friends. Treat everyone you fuck like family. Sometimes your family treats you bad but you love them still. Deal with it - lift them up if you can.

Advice #3 - find work that you really love and commit to it. Make your work and your kids the main thing in life.

Most important: build a strong mental/spiritual/emotional foundation - you can be OK in any circumstance, good or bad. (that is my game) Find a practice that works for you.

Feminism is an awful development. RP is a necessary reaction. Stay strong but don't go overboard with it. A bit of sugar helps the medicine go down.

WeAreGlidingNow · 2015-01-07T14:09:49+00:00

I appreciate all the comments. Nothing really for me to add. But, for anyone considering marriage in the USA, go to YouTube, search for "Family Court", and watch. Hint: the results aren't men relieved that the Family Court system is great. Marriage means you lose your 8th and 13th Amendment rights. Stay Classy, Western civilization.

EDIT: divorce is when you lose your rights.

2015-01-07T15:23:20+00:00

Late to the thread, but in addition to the great advice aready posted:

Be honest and reliable. Be true to your word.

Keep a positive attitude.

Smile in the face of strife.

Turn a mistake into a positive lesson-learned.

Don't rush into things that do not require it. What's perceived as procastination can benefit you in ways that you might not be aware of at the time.

Disregard other's opinion of you. They won't matter to you in the long run.

Have mostly rough sex. Don't "make love" like in the Hollywood movies often.

One last thing (that I will post at this time - so much more to recommend): On not marrying, know that being alone is not the same thing as being lonely.

2015-01-07T15:34:20+00:00

I still would have gotten married but I would have defined very, very clear boundaries and expectations as it comes to money, sex & duties in the home.

By coming off as open and sharing early in the marriage, I basically told my wife that she has me. That everything I have and will accomplish is hers as well which is fine. It's fine so long as she lives up to her end of the bargain and that means she continues to hold me in a high regard and treat me with respect and not contempt.

Young men. Do not lose yourself and your mission between her legs. You know who you want to be. Be that man within your marriage or you will regret it.

tyofwa · 2015-01-07T20:39:13+00:00

I’m 41 this month. If a time machine enabled me to talk with my 20-YO self, here is my advice:

Accomplish shit. Remember that 1st computer you built in 1993 and the day it took to figure out your SLIP/PPP settings to surf the internet from your modem? More of that. Remember all those cool ideas you had which would use technology to make the world a better place and you a lot of money? GO DO THEM. FAIL. DO SOME MORE. FAIL SOME MORE. Then you will succeed.
Build your circle. Friends, colleagues, classmates… Cultivate your circles with positive people. Cull the negative ones. Don’t bale on your network when you land a girlfriend.
Don’t get into LTRs until late 20’s at the EARLIEST. I was in a “relationship” from 15-21. What I thought was the best thing in my life was really shielding both of us from the growth we should’ve experienced.
Marriage – ONLY IF YOU WANT KIDS!!! If so, not until you are 30 and can confidently state the following:

I have marked at least 25% of the items off my bucket list

I like who I am when I’m alone for long periods of time

I have a great “circle”

I have exciting and productive goals

I am accomplishing my goals

My mate will enter MY frame; I will not enter hers
Watch “Wall Street”. Notable quotes from Gordon Gekko – “I don't throw darts at a board. I bet on sure things. Read Sun-tzu, The Art of War. Every battle is won before it is ever fought.” And “If you need a friend, get a dog”
Nobody gives a shit. Maybe mom, but she cant do much. Rent due and cant pay? TOUGH SHIT. Car needs a transmission? Time to fix that bitch yourself. Stayed up too late and want to call in sick? Man the fuck up. Your boss doesn’t care. Get up each day assuming you just moved to a new town and no one cares if you live or die. If you get any support from your circle, consider it an unexpected bonus.

H42 · 2015-01-07T17:18:02+00:00

Start your own business. The earlier, the better. Choose something you can grow for +20 years and stay interested.

Early on, start saving money for retirement, never spend it no matter how tough things are.

Never marry. Those hos ain't loyal. 'nuff said.

Take reasonable risks with things that might benefit you.

JDillla · 2015-01-07T11:38:59+00:00

This thread might need to be side-barred

grendalor · 2015-01-07T14:51:20+00:00

Don't get married. Really. That doesn't mean don't have relationships, or even very long LTRs, but don't marry them. Marriage changes the entire dynamic of a relationship away from anything resembling the red pill worldview, regardless of where your relationship started. You can, with a lot of effort, have a red pill marriage, but it isn't worth the effort 99% of the time. The reason is that you can get the "benefits" of marriage in an LTR without actually being married, and dealing with all of the crap that entails. Stay freer, and stay unmarried. I'm more or less happily married, due to a lot of work in trying to steer it RP, but if I had to make the decision again I would skip getting married. If there were an ultimatum issued, I would walk and next her. Just not worth it.
Do not have children. Children are great at times, but they're a huge suck on your time, your money, your freedom, your energy -- basically everything. A large part of your life will revolve around the children if you have them and, on balance, it's not worth it. Net/net you're giving more than you're getting in that deal, believe me. I love my kids, but if I had to do it again, I'd skip having kids.
Never neglect your body. The most important thing in your life is your body. Lift, lift and lift. Get big, stay big. Cut body fat. This is the single most important thing you can do in your life, because it has a ripple effect in every other aspect of your life -- confidence, career success, social success and, yes, sexual success. Don't do it to get chicks. Do it because it improves every single aspect of your life, and in a big way. And don't stop doing it. Do it in your 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, etc. It has to be the core of your life -- your body. If I could go back and do it again, I would have spent much much much more time lifting weights from a young age.
Make lots of money. Whether you do it as a highly skilled professional, or as someone who hustles here and there, do it. Make bank. Save money. Don't spend frivolously on stupid shit like cars or tech toys or expensive vacations and so on. Save money, build your bank, and build wealth. Again, this is for you -- not for chicks (see point 1). You also gain in confidence as you gain financial independence over time by building wealth, so it helps your life overall. I have done a lot of this, but looking back there is more I could have done, and would do, if I could go back and do it again.
Do spend money on good clothes. Don't be the guy who thinks spending money on good clothes is a waste of money. It's one of the best uses of your money possible. And it's great leverage in your life, because so few men do it -- most men look terrible and are dressed terribly. If you aren't, you stand out, and that's key in all aspects of life. It helps your career, it helps your social life, and it helps you with women. Spend money on clothes that fit well, period. Something I would have done differently if I could do it again.
Develop mastery in something unrelated to your work. Master a martial art. Master something working with your hands. Master a musical instrument or photography or something. Develop some mastery in something -- and not something stupid like video games, or something passive like "reading literature" -- something active, something physical and/or creative. This gives you something to do of value, which builds confidence, increases you in the eyes of others, and also expands your social network into more areas. If I could do this again, I would have seriously picked up a mastery hobby younger than I did.
Network like hell. You should be on a first name basis with at least 100 people in real life. Men and women. Build your social network and get to know more people. It helps in so many ways -- professionally, financially, socially, sexually. All of it. Emphasize contacts with people who have velocity in life -- they are the most beneficial. But have the contacts be real as well -- these aren't facebook friends. These are people you know on a first name basis, people you wish happy birthday to, people you speak with periodically and socialize with. In other words, not close friends, but actual friends and not virtual ones. This won't be built overnight, but the process of building it, and the impact of having it in place is huge, and if I had to do things over, I would have focused on building this beginning in my 20s.

HungryGeorge · 2015-01-07T03:57:31+00:00

When I was in my 40's I left the United States and took a job abroad. I have not visited the U.S since 2005. It was the best decision I ever made. Young men, get out of the U.S. as soon as possible. It is not that hard.

chrisindub · 2015-01-07T10:49:02+00:00

If I had it to do all over again.....

My only regret is wasting time on girls who were less intelligent and of poor character.

By exclusively approaching and pursuing more intelligent and successful women, you learn more, become smarter yourself, and sharpen your techniques.

Chasing dumb, unsuccessful, and much younger women is easy and a waste of time.

fhghg · 2015-01-07T21:57:42+00:00

Nothing. You can't tell that idiot anything. He won't listen.

dbtng · 2015-01-07T07:24:27+00:00

Yeah, this won't get many upvotes.

I'd have married K instead of continuing the search for the some perfect girl. She was beautiful, intelligent, educated, career-oriented, fun, respected me, had no interest in children, open to threesomes, liked anal, and demanded nothing from me. I wanted some strange, so I dumped her. I've been looking for that combination since then. My bad, bad mistake.

At least a hundred notches in my condom since K; never satisfied, always moving on. Lotsa bitches, couple angels, none of them worth my time.

Mmmhmm. I fucked up.

topapito · 2015-01-07T07:07:30+00:00

Ok guys. 51 here. Been married 6 times. Will easily marry again and jumping into an LTR as we speak. Here's why.

1- Leave the states. Choose a tax friendly country

2- Never, ever, ever, and I mean never, share your money making knowledge. Make your money, structure your companies so YOU are poor.

3- Never let anyone know where your money comes from. NO ONE

4- Never buy a house if you marry, NEVER, if you want to own a house, open a corp and use it to buy the house and always have a rental agreement. Never outright own the corp that owns your stuff.

5- Never own anything on paper

6- Never, wait no, I mean NEVER, EVER borrow money. If you have to borrow money to get it, you can't afford it. Fuck your credit score. No, don't mortgage your house either.

7- Even if you live in a country with decent tax rates, keep any money you accumulate in another country. Your residency and your cash shall never meet.

8- Have more than one business. However small, but with steady monthly incomes. Steady incomes being key. A car wash netting you 2k a month is better than nothing. Ten of them is better than 1.

9- Always own an offshore company. Bearer bonds are your friend

10- Work with private banks. 'NUFF SAID

These 10 points should have you in tip top shape for when your LTR craps out. Give them nothing they haven't earned. Get a pre-nup, or not, if you own nothing on paper, you've got nothing.

This locks up your lifestyle and allows you to live in a mansion and drive a ferrari, none of it yours and if done right, completely bullet proof.

Oh, and do not live in the US. Get citizenship in a tax beneficial country and resign US citizenship if you want to really have freedom.

EDIT: Formatting and stuffs

StopItRick · 2015-01-07T06:30:38+00:00

I would not make myself so available to women. If I wanted to spend time with someone I would make time. If they called last minute I would drop what I was doing and take them out. I learned that most American women don't like that, there is no challenge and that usually doesn't work for them. So I wouldn't return calls on weekend or so anything unless we had plans prior.

kjvlv · 2015-01-07T15:21:17+00:00

I have great kids so if I had done things differently, perhaps the would not be in my life so, doing things differently is out.

I would advise males to not get married. It is a shitty deal for the man and is getting shittier.

Going forward, I am changing the direction of my life. if my spouse wants to then fine. if not, adios. I will not live out my adult life being treated as the doofus dad on a sitcom. My life is for living, just like my wife's and my dream is not to endless try and make her dreams come true.

HeadingRed · 2015-01-07T19:57:53+00:00

I would never have let my GF move in with me. (and I did that 3 more times including now in my late 40's).
Never had started smoking.
I thought being active and not getting fat was good enough. Now in physical therapy. Exercise men, exercise.
Done a better job of keeping my mouth shut.
Would not associate with criminals\sketchy people. Goes for 24\7 wake-n-bake types as well.

6. Would have spent more time with my family (grandparents, mother, etc.) and less partying with the people I don't talk to at all any more.

Looking back I missed on sex, romance and even love by hesitating or "being nice". Kiss that girl, tell you you want her- not just as a friend. If you think she might be interested but you're not sure don't wait. I cannot believe the amount of sex I probably passed up, and have had two women who I adored in my early 20's tell me later they really wanted me to ask them out.

My good moves- did not get married, did not have kids. Never got fat, not a drunk\druggie.

2015-01-07T18:19:27+00:00

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2015-01-07T18:48:06+00:00

I wanted to raise a kid and that has been a very rich part of my life, no regrets. Not having a kid would be denying a big part of being a provider and man.

Have a career that will reward you $$ and make you satisfied with your life.

Partner selection - find a smart, funny hard working women if you want a LTR or mother of your child.

Always be a leader and do not let anyone deny you that position in your own life.

2015-01-09T06:54:13+00:00

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blacwidonsfw · 2015-01-07T11:49:25+00:00

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heeb · 2015-01-07T12:16:33+00:00

Just turned 50.

Some things I wouldn't do differently, but the same as I have done:

Live in at least a few different countries (I've lived in 4 countries; this number might go up).
Learn at least 2 more languages besides your native one (I speak 3 languages fluently; this number might go up).
Focus more on non-western women. They tend to be less entitled, more "traditional" (for want of a better word), more naturally RPW (in my experience).

ADDED: Oh, and read, read, read... Get some knowledge, some culture. Be distinguished. Don't be like 40 million other guys.

zpatriarchy · 2015-01-07T15:29:26+00:00

I wouldn't have "respected" girls so much to my own detriment. i would have treated them the way they wanted to be treated. i would have got married & had kids if i had.

i know most of us are anti-marriage. i am too now. but if i could back that's what i would do, knowing what i know now. marriage can work if you remember that you can never take a day off & never relax.

being a nice guy, gentleman was the wrong way to go. i cannot list all the missed opportunites from my life because of this.

Holden_Frame · 2015-01-08T02:14:20+00:00

Early 40's but will chime in anyway.

Regret the things you do, not the things you don't do.

Getting shut down by a girl is far better than realizing you pussed out on a sure thing when it's too late.

Looking back, I have to accept that because of my BP behavior I've Beta'd myself out of far more pussy and sexual adventures (including a three way with sisters) than I will likely ever get in the future no matter how RP I become.

Master yourself. Study your own weaknesses and learn to maneuver around them. Look inward more than outward.

Abundance mentality is for real. Leaving yourself thirsty and scared nearly guarantees failure in many things in life.

Lifting heavy and consistently does so much more than simply make you look better. It improves all aspects of your life.

No girl is worth sacrificing your self respect for.

When entering an LTR make sure you are doing it for the right reasons. (I.e. Not just to be "not alone")

Before giving up on an LTR (or allowing yourself to fuck it up by going Beta) make sure you are certain you will be happier without her and aren't sacrificing a very good partner for a phantom "perfect" one.

Don't underestimate the power of porn to induce complacency. Value moderation.

I would add that it is to not sacrifice your humanity. The ability to empathize with people different from you is important if you aren't going to walk around angry all the time. This is a potential pitfall of becoming too obsessed with RP thinking. Everybody / everything can start to seem like an enemy that needs to be defeated.

sterlinghtsmi · 2015-01-07T12:54:54+00:00

Major sticking points - #1 Do not have kids till after 34yrs old if at all. If you must have a child, adopt, give a young life a chance at becoming Alpha. #2 Go to college or trade school and make bank bro! Money rules and makes girls drool. #3 Anywhere you go, you Alpha go....do it without being a stuck up concited asshole and you've master the game. #4 Keep your shit in shape, fucking takes hard work and good fucking means being covered in sweat when it's over. #5 Buy quality goods always, you don't want to put a cheap collar and leash on your girl....take pride in what is yours.

Danedina · 2015-01-08T16:22:10+00:00

First of all, I want to say that I’m as happy now as I’ve ever been in my life, and I’ve made it a point to catch myself when I start lamenting the things I “should” have done. I’m 44, recently divorced, have two fantastic daughters, and am in an LTR with 26 y.o. Russian chick who has a body I never would have believed existed. I get along well with my ex, who was a catch when we were both in our 20s.

With that said, my best advice to young men is to take a good, hard look at where your life is heading and figure out if you’re making your own decisions or not. I liked my wife when we were first dating, but I was never blown away by her. A lot of guys were jealous of me, and I took that as confirmation that I had a keeper. One day we were getting out of the car and she said, “don’t you think we should get married?” And I just sort of accepted the fact that we should start planning a wedding because that’s what you do in your 20s: you find a wife and you get married and you start making children. So that’s what we did.

Fast-forward to my 30s. For some reason I just can’t ejaculate any more when I’m fucking my wife. Oh well, I’ll just hide in the workroom playing video games all night. It’s not like I can just get divorced and find someone else, because I’m old and I’d never get a woman better than my wife, and anyways I'm fucking impotent. My wife tells me she wants more sex, and soon I’m so self-conscious that I can barely get it up anymore. Even with whores. What a loser I am!

Long story short: sexual therapy, 22 year old mistress, holy shit I’m not dead after all! How does this divorce thing work?

The point to all of this is that I didn’t really want to marry this woman, but I settled.

Don’t settle!

2015-01-08T16:27:00+00:00

I don't know how much I would have done differently, but there is without a doubt one piece of information that I would have appreciated knowing, and it's AWALT. (and it's not because of an affair, or divorce) I understood rep pill theory back then, but it was from the viewpoint of, a certain percentage of women like it when guys are jerks/dominate/bossy to them, not all of them. Or, some women like leaders, but not all of them. Or even, why on earth do women throw their panties at rock stars during a concert? Would I have made different choices? Of course I think anybody would, you always make mistakes and would like to go back and do them differently. Red pill knowledge is like having a reference book on male/female dynamics. At least it's understood now, back then it would have given me at the very least an understanding of why things work the way they do, I wouldn't have had to learn so many, many things the hard way. I can picture like it's yesterday, on the high school sports team at practice watching the interaction of another guy I knew and his girlfriend, him being a complete jerk to her, and me thinking, christ is she messed up, why on earth would she pick him. And I wasn't even hot for her. Now I get it, it's how women are wired. Would have been really, really nice to have learned that back then.

Other guys here had great points as well.

Title	Older players (late 40s/50s & up), tell us what you would do differently if you could go back 20 years looking through the RP lens.
Author	seattleron
Upvotes	499
Comments	425
Date	January 7, 2015 2:02 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/2rkz4s/older_players_late_40s50s_up_tell_us_what_you/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/older-players-late-40s50s-up-tell-us-what-you.27615 https://theredarchive.com/post/27615

4 so hard. I've blown ~$40,000 in the past 5 years. In cash. Currently consolidating and just going to own an automatic station wagon.