Quick-and-dirty tips and tricks for aspiring alphas

A pure, natural alpha doesn't need tips and tricks for maintaining frame, but I am anything but a natural alpha and these are some simple techniques I've employed to "fake it till I make it" with respect to communicating with women, including in a LTR.

Never discuss your feelings or emotions. Just don't. Holding her hand in silence or hugging her warmly is all she needs. Do not betray your inner emotional life to a woman's fickle ears.

Do not talk about yourself. Don't psychoanalyze yourself out loud to her. Talk about the things you love and enjoy. Don't talk about yourself. She is not worthy of that. That is for a close male friend if at all.

Occasionally be unexpectedly thoughtful. Give her a cupcake with your names on it. Pick her a flower. Tiny expressions like this, devoid of any verbal affection and followed immediately by a return to the relatively aloof and stoic frame, can pierce a woman's heart with an emotional snag that sparks a deeper kind of attraction and love.

Be in charge of goodbyes. Initiate departures most of the time. If she says she should probably get going, immediately comply with a smile. Always appear comfortable leaving.

Touch her. You are entitled to her body. It's your toy for you to play with and enjoy. Assume this right as early as possible, beginning with benign physical contact and quickly escalating. It's her responsibility to protect herself from unwanted physical affection, not yours to guess how much affection she is comfortable with. Her restricting your access is funny, always. Acting butt-hurt about being rejected is tremendously unattractive.

Regularly temporarily withdraw from initiating any physical affection. Find that you're touching her first a lot? Withdraw for 15 minutes to an hour. Don't refuse her touch, just abstain from initiating it. She may not notice this consciously but subconsciously it can trigger a slightly oxytocin deficiency that will clue her into how much she needs you.

Sex should consist of her acting in submission to you. In bed, she is a rag doll, a slave. Exercise complete dominion over your woman in bed. The only limits to your alpha expression in bed should be legal ones. Don't be an English farmer, be a Viking pillager.

Obligatory: Lift 3x week, keep a top-tier haircut, wear good clothes (if you have no idea where to start, just go to H&M and Urban Outfitters).

Ditch all processed foods. Eat as clean as possible. This will improve every aspect of your life immediately. If you need to ween off processed foods, start with clean breakfasts, then add clean lunches, etc. No added sugar, no corn syrup. Buy natural ingredients and learn to enjoy simple home-cooked meals.

Meditate. Just do it. Meditate every day. If you don't know where to start, sit down somewhere, close your eyes, and count your breaths to 100. Tame your mind.

Cut out all porn. It's time to put that away. Fantasizing is for teenagers.

Experiment with abstaining from masturbation. Shoot for one week and observe the cognitive and hormonal effects. Everyone is different but many people find that abstaining dramatically increases social confidence and energy. This has been my experience. YMMV.

Usually wait at least 10 minutes before responding to a text. If you're hanging out waiting to receive a text on your phone, at least pretend you're not.

Don't use smiley faces, exclamation marks, or laughing ("haha," "lol).

Send less words to her than she is to you. Count them. Additionally, a text should be less than 8 words.

At least 75% of texts sent to her should be unserious, witty, flirtatious, teasing. Texting is for entertainment, not meaningful relationship-building.

Before sending a text, ask yourself this question regarding the text: "Could an idiot have written this text?" Don't say things like "How are you?" Don't ask her about her day. Tie in a previous bit of information in a witty way. Stimulate your woman's mind in a way that other people can't.

Never discuss feelings or emotions via text. Your sincere thoughts are probably too meaningful and sacred to even be communicated verbally to your woman, let alone put into a cheap text.

Err on the side of less texting. Regularly fail completely to respond or acknowledge her texts, including questions that seem important to her. You love her, but you love yourself more and you have a life to attend to.

Furthermore, occasionally ignore her for periods of time ranging from 12 to 48 hours. Two days of radio silence, unexplained, will increase attraction from a woman who is already has feelings for you. For a long-term relationship, 24 hours may be sufficient. I promise you that causing your girlfriend emotional pain by occasionally ignoring her for an uncomfortable 24 hours will directly result in more attraction, not less.

If you are a hopelessly beta, bottom of the barrel male, I recommend shocking your system by committing yourself to a couple of days of solitude in the wilderness. Buy some gear and go into the wilderness for a couple of days with food and water. Avoid trails, climb mountains, get lost, take some risks. If this seems unnecessary or dangerous, you are still psychologically a child.