a noticeable trend between history of abuse and red pill acceptance/indoctrination

bagoonga · 2019-08-29T01:08:43+00:00

This makes so much sense considering how much their model of attractiveness for both men and women is based solely on what one can get out of the other. That's all narcissists really care about with people. Men are into women for reproduction, and women are into men for protection and resources. They leave out individuals liking each other for personal reasons because they lack(ed) that in their own life. That's why they think men and women like each other solely for what they define as their masculinity or femininity. It's like to them there's no other reason a woman would like a man or vice-versa.

thebassoonist06 · 2019-08-28T22:49:34+00:00

Makes a lot of sense. I had an abusive mother and absent father. It's also pretty hard to believe in and have normal bonds as a young adult if your role models don't set healthy examples. I was lucky enough to find healthy friendships/ relationships in my early twenties that helped me learn these skills and lessons.

Traveledfarwestward · 2019-08-29T13:17:21+00:00

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zero-sum_thinking

Easy to get stuck in a mindset if that’s all you know.

Rad1Red · 2019-08-29T09:52:40+00:00

As with anything, I'd still need to see a basis for Strauss' numbers. :)

But your assumption does sound logical. Having been the product of an abusive home myself, I can confirm that making healthy bonds as a young adult after living in such an environment is difficult.

They don't end up with TRP because they're happy, that one's for sure.

Exis007 · 2019-08-30T17:16:31+00:00

Can I take another path with this?

I would say, rather than abuse, the better correlation would be authoritarian parenting. That can absolutely verge into abuse, but so can other parenting styles as well. The idea behind authoritarian parenting is that children need more rules, more discipline, and more structure. There's a strict adherence to traditional power structures (I am the parent and you do what I say) and traditional gender roles.

I hear him say, "I was always being watched, I was always being judged, and finding favor in her judgement," and he considers that a criticism of his mother (perhaps rightly so). But that is inherently a top down power structure, a hallmark of authoritarian parenting. And it very well could have had abusive manifestations. But he doesn't then turn towards a different notion of self or a different emotional guidepost. He's still stuck in an authoritarian framework, still relying on traditional gender roles. Had his father taught him how to be a man, this would have been negated. If only he had been taken to the woods instead of nurtured, this could have been avoided.

I think he's right to be critical of top-down, authoritarian parenting. I sure as hell am. But, at the same time, he can't escape that framework and continues to rely on it to offer an alternate path. It's not the parenting style that's broken, its the gender imbalance within the framework that caused problems. It was incorrectly implemented by a lack of a strong father figure to teach better masculinity. He can't break outside the framework enough to consider whether there are bigger problems with how he's constructing the parent/child relationship, definitions of self, emotional needs, etc.

Five_Decades · 2019-09-03T22:57:47+00:00

OH yeah, there is a huge huge correlation between parental abuse/neglect and growing up to enter the PUA -> TRP -> MGTOW treadmill.

Huge. I'm glad you brought the issue up, because its something that is swept under the rug. Abused and neglected children do not learn healthy ways of relating to people, especially in romantic relationships. I was abused and neglected as a kid, and I fell down the PUA -> TRP -> MGTOW treadmill until I started working on myself, working on my issues, and my unresolved childhood traumas.

Neil Strauss (ex PUA leader and now reformed) claimed that 80% of PUAs had been raised by narcissistic mothers. It creates a strong codependency urge deep inside you, and a strong desire to obtain validation from females who don't want to give it to you.

I think most of the leaders of the PUA movement were abused or neglected as kids.

https://newrepublic.com/article/123125/can-pickup-artist-unlearn-his-tricks

Rehab, he said, wasn’t the answer (“Whatever sex-positive is, this place was just sex-negative”), but it did give him the chance to talk about his childhood—specifically, his controlling, self-absorbed mom. She had no boundaries; she made him into her private confidant. And as he learned in rehab, she was the source of his problem. This situation, Strauss noted, is hardly unique. Tucker Max also has a narcissistic mom. So does the author of The Art of Seduction. When Strauss ran seminars on dating—one of his lucrative post-Game gigs—he found out that many of the book’s biggest acolytes had similar backgrounds: distant fathers, narcissistic mothers. “I thought that I wrote The Game and millions of people read it, which meant I must be speaking some kind of truth. What I realized was that maybe I was just speaking to people with my same shit or trauma.” Strauss paused for a few moments to let that sink in, then added: “Guess what, guys? We’re all fucked up together!”

Also read this article, it is a huge eye opener about how unresolved codependency issues underly the PUA movement.

http://therawness.com/reader_letters.pdf

MementoMordor · 2019-09-04T16:33:04+00:00

What red pill garbage did your father have you belive that you now have changed mind about?

Title	a noticeable trend between history of abuse and red pill acceptance/indoctrination
Author	SHAKIRAISHOT
Upvotes	34
Comments	11
Date	August 28, 2019 10:37 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/cws2gy/a_noticeable_trend_between_history_of_abuse_and/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/a-noticeable-trend-between-history-of-abuse-and.299622 https://theredarchive.com/post/299622