Reading RP has conditioned me to believe that no girl could love me for who I am.

I was conditioned to believe that I have to act in a certain way to attract girls. I had to put on a facade of acting Alpha and dumbing down parts of my personality to appear more basic.

When I acted "alpha" and tried to be cool I did attract some girls, but I also attracted girls with my natural personality...which is calm and stoic. I noticed that the girls I attracted with my natural personality were often not only better looking but much more mature and genuinely nice personality, whereas the ones I attracted with my macho cool guy personality were insecure and trashy.

I'm not naturally an extroverted person...now that I quit drinking alcohol I realized this, yet I am having a somewhat difficult time believing a girl could love the naturally introverted/calm personality that I have.

I've always tried to change my personality and be someone I wasn't and elements of RP reinforced that.