Stats: 7/10, 13% bodyfat 175 lbs. Bench max 255, Squats 325
Spiritual 6/10, read bible every morning and go fo church every sunday while having mens fellowship every thursday
Reading: 5/10, reas NMMNG and the 100-200 sidebar
Ok, so here goes. Girlfriend and I were planning to be engaged this summer and we have been dating for a little over 13 months. I’m 22 she’s 19. In about 2.5 months in our relationship she told me she was raped when she was younger (hasn’t told me the age at all) by a close friend of the family and that she didn’t go to police because she didn’t want to break up the guys family. I asked if it was an older man with a family and she nodded yes. I don’t much other than that besides it was forced and it was a one time thing.
I know other girls who were raped who show some signs that something may have happened. They don’t like being touched and are generally not flirty with boys. I ran into issues with my gf before with her being a bit too “friendly” and even giving someone (an older male) her number because she couldn’t say no. Not sure if there is a link between that
She doesn’t want to talk about her past and says she moved on and doesn’t want to think about it. However something doesn’t feel right in my spirit as I feel there is more to the story. She told her parents and they didn’t press charges.
2 days ago I asked her if there is anything she hasn’t been fully honest about before going into marriage, she told she hasn’t told me the name of the guy who molested her. She said that’s information that only a husband should have access too (despite us being honest about other things and us having sex) she said if I propose she may tell me.
I asked her if the guy is still in her life in some way or form, she said something along the lines I can’t tell you until you marry me. Then said later, “My burdens are mines to carry”
My heart sank and I think this is a red flag. I told her that I felt like she was baiting this information so I can marry her. I also told her that this means that the past isn’t dealt with but rather it is still in the present.
She has also lied to me before and omitted stuff about her in other things so I’m even doubting if it was consensual or not because she, in the past has told me she has a habit of lying (she can lie effortlessly and has apologized for doing it to me before, to my knowledge this doesn’t happen often)
I’m scared brothers is this a red flag?
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