(TL;DR at the bottom)

Foreword: Pardon the click bait. I'm committing heresy and probably opening Pandora's box, but against my better judgement I'm going to share this. I want it understood that I'm not trying to prosthelytize; this is an anecdote based on my personal experience. I anticipate that my perspective will no doubt be met with fervent disagreement, incredulity, or perhaps even hostility (this isn't in the same solar system as politically correct) but you're not going to change my mind at this point. I've heard just about every rebuttal there is but I'm gonna stick with what I've lived.

Haven't seen much discussion regarding this so I wish to compare notes and find out if others have had similar experiences with lesbians. And if so, whether they've had repeatable success at bedding them. Before this gets written off as some humblebrag I'd like to establish that I am not special, I've merely compiled these experiences from lots of trial and error. Mostly error.

Getting on with it: After my sexual encounters with them (cue the No True Scotsman), I don't believe in such thing as lesbians. I tend to think female sexuality is fluid and situational (who knew?), and that modern lesbianism is one of the greatest achievements in mental gymnastics that I've ever witnessed.

I won't pretend to have this completely figured out but from what I've seen, I'd say on a mental level lesbians aren't interested in relationships with men. And while they sincerely desire, love, and enjoy women (not on a primal level the way we do) they are still physically capable of feeling tingles for a man with the right stimuli. As far as I'm concerned, nearly all lesbians under the right conditions would sleep with a man.

While I don't really fuck with them anymore, I've spent more time among lesbians than anyone should really bother to (gay clubs are a hell of a thing). It took me over ten years to really pick up on it but once I get to know them well enough, every lesbian I've met had a pattern of similar experiences or variations thereof that I'll simplify into archetypes.

Why do I like to fuck lesbians? Honestly I suspect it has something to do with the fact that I almost lost my virginity to one but turned her down because I was a scared teenage bitch at the time. Other times I think I was just trying to prove a point to myself. I don't pursue them exclusively though, it's more of when-it-falls-into-my-lap thing these days.

Every lesbian I've met or otherwise had a sexual encounter with always has shit in common with one or more of these categories. I've even called some out to their angry denials only to find out later that I was right. The dish may vary but the ingredients remained the same. Anyway here's the rough breakdown:

The One-Semester Lesbian: The bi-curious ones. These are superficial as far as lesbians go. The song-inspired label comes from the cliche that a fair bit of college girls have a dyke phase. Many of these women are well off, usually having nothing but middle to upper class first-world problems. At the worst, mommy and daddy got divorced or one of the parents cheated. If they're not rich, they're certainly not deprived. Some dabble and others go all in, some for a few months and some even a few years depending on how deep they are into their identity.

These are typically the cutest variety of lesbian or what you might recognize as a 'lip-stick lesbo'. These are women you wouldn't think were gay because they dress and act exactly like straight women, except they're cunning linguists. These girls could easily land a man if they wanted, and they haven't been that much harder for me to seduce than regular women.

They pick it up, play with it for a while, and then 'realize' they prefer men. They don't have as much damage control to execute with their friends and family because they can write it off as they were only experimenting with their sexuality. Or they re-come out as a bisexual but stick with men.

The Sexually Abused: Before I describe this type of lesbian, understand that I didn't seek them out. I discovered after gaining their trust that they'd supposedly been through some bad things, though I can't rule out that some of them may have been embellishing, hamstering, or outright lying. These lesbians were allegedly molested/raped at some point. Some by women, a lot by male relatives.

These women were the hardest to fuck surpassed only by Butch Dykes. If they weren't virgins, they had an almost non-existent notch count.

Alpha game was a hit or miss with them since kino might 'trigger' them. I had to use a kind of counterintuitive hybrid game to earn their trust and make them comfortable with me before carefully escalating. These are risky to deal with because if you try to pump and dump them, they might hit the bitch switch and cry rape. Dating and breaking up has either alpha widowed them and they may never fuck men again, or they warm up to men in general if you were genuinely caring.

The Ugly Duckling: This is the most common lesbian I come across and have the most experience with. They're either low SMV, or used to be. If they liked me, I basically had to let them 'court' me which was awfully similar to the way Betas try to ingratiate themselves via friendship. Many of these girls didn't get flirted with or hit on much (if at all) growing up, and any boyfriends they may have had were low SMV and either very insulting or very beta. A fair amount of them also had a heterosexual LTR in the past but were dumped/cheated on. Lots of tomboys or subcultures (Goth, Punk, etc) in this group, who were written off as one of the guys while their crushes went unrequited. The ones who never had a boyfriend might have had intercourse once or twice, but it wasn't enjoyable.

Some of them grow into their looks or puberty does wonders, but the damage is already done and they'd rather hamster themselves into being gay than be rejected by men at large. This group also seems to supply the greatest number of candidates for Butchdom. These lesbians won't always seek out male attention or flirt, but they'll certainly harvest the shit out of male orbiters and validation so long as it happens according to their hamster's terms and pace.

These lesbians are highly susceptible to what I jokingly call the Dick Itch. The idea is basically that every once a while, a lesbian goes into some sort of heat where she really wants to be fucked by a man. If your SMV is higher, you're a hoot to chill with, and happen to be at the right place at the right time you get to be at ground zero when the itch hits. The reasons they give to others and themselves for succumbing to it are predictable to the point where I could've sworn all lesbians convene in some sort of group mind meld to create these excuses. If they're heavily involved in LGBT culture, they'll get the blessing of other lesbians first. The lesbian will admit to wanting sex with a man's body but having no desire for a relationship. And then they'll be given permission with something along the lines of \"You're still gay but your hormones are craving a temporary fix, our sexuality is complex blah blah blah\". As long as they return to the Dyke Side of the Force they aren't a gay traitor; lesbian street cred retained. I find it ironic since I thought the whole point of being a lesbian was you didn't like dick, buuut hamster wheel spins on regardless. In situations where they can't justify it to themselves or abdicate agency (like being intoxicated or high), no sex occurs unless it was in a threesome. I remember a time where a militant lesbian orbited me for months until we were both alone and tripping on E (during my more reckless years), and then got so sensually grabby that the only way out was through her vagina. She never spoke of it to her friends and acted like it never happened, my purpose had been served it seems.

I've narrowed my successful tactics down to 2 types of approach. For those who aren't that attached to their queer identity and were not used to male attention but would love it, standard Alpha worked with a garnish of Beta to hint at my heart of gold. I made them laugh, teased them with what I'd do to them if they were straight, and was rewarded with a chance to show 'em what I got.

The second approach for more guarded lesbians involved a spicier serving of Alpha with a side of Beta to disarm them. Couldn't escalate too quickly with these. I'd come onto them at first, sometimes with a kiss only be told that I wasn't getting any farther. I'd back off and keep them around socially while they slowly took an interest. I'd show no further signs of attraction to them and they'd warm up and get more cock-teasy to try and break me. When the sex finally happened, escalation was nearly instantaneous. I kept my poker face until a situation arose where we lost ourselves to a fit of horny passion.

The general take away from it all was that I had to exaggerate both alpha and beta traits in varying degrees while restraining my flirting, though I'm not sure why.

The results of fucking these kinds of girls were equally polarized. Either they would go ham and enter girly girl mode, or they would stay aloof and never progress past casual sex or a one night stand. This depended on how invested they were in their identity. Lesbians who were immersed in the culture wouldn't enter relationships if it meant being shunned from the LGBT community.

The Butch Dyke: We all know what these are. A lot of these are also Ugly Ducklings except they were far more committed to their gaydom but the general rules of seduction for Ugly Ducklings still worked here with diminished returns. They're also highly resistant to game, though drunken threesomes got my foot in the door. I've never seen a Butch above a 7 that wasn't some kind of famous (and therefore even more committed to their narrative). These seemed to fall into 2 camps as well.

One kind preferred to be addressed as \"he\" and \"sir\", identifying as male with new agey or psuedo-scientific justifications. I've determined that the effort-to-result ratio of sexing one of these up is so statistically insignificant there's no point in really trying.

The other kind wanted to be called \"she\" and \"her\" and would get offended if someone mistook them for a boy even though they adopted a masculine appearance. Funny story: they insisted that they didn't give up their woman card because gender identity is a social construct and there was no such thing as 'boy clothes and haircuts'. After invalidating that defense by reminding them that according to OUR culture (Western), certain clothes and behaviors are specifically optimized for use by males and that even babies show preferences for certain colors and toys, I would often bait them into revealing the extent of their nonsense. One conversation went something like this:

(Asking the Butch's girl)

Me: \"You're a lesbian right? So that means you're a woman who is sexually attracted to other women?\"

Her: \"Correct.\"

Me: \"So that means being attracted to everything that comes with a woman right? Not only her mind but her appearance and feminine energy, yes?\"

Her: \"Of course.\"

Me: \"So then what's the deal with strap-ons?\"

Her: \"It's about the sensation, and a strap on isn't a dick.\"

After glancing at her Butch girlfriend and raising an eyebrow I asked: \"So if you're attracted to women and everything that entails, why fuck a woman who wears clothes intended for men, cuts her hair and emulates behaviors exhibited by them when you can have the genuine article? Plus a man is strong enough to pick you up and handle you like a toy. Ever get fucked in mid-air?\"

They were never able to give me a good answer for that one, but I digress.

On the occasion where I was able to bed a Butch, their hamsters usually wrote off the experience by saying something like: \"It's not your body I'm attracted to, it's your character/mind/soul.\"

Closing comments: And that's the long and short of my report. I've personally found that lesbians have a sweet spot where they'll fuck men, though in my opinion it's not worth pursuing as a reliable strategy. While some of them can be very sweet people who don't hate or resent men, lesbians aren't as compelling as the fantasy had me believe and many make shitty girlfriends even for other lesbians. These women are damaged in some way, no matter how well adjusted they try to portray themselves. The reasons and hamsters come in different editions, but I've no cause to think that the lesbians I've dealt with were special snowflakes who weren't gay deep down. There's no way I'm that lucky. None of them are gay deep down if you ask me.

As for women who marry men and then come out as gay later in life? My personal theory is that their husband stopped giving them the tingles and without the ability to get back on the carousel they shake things up by taking on a new lifestyle. I've seen some of these have sex with men also, just not with me (I don't aim for women that old).

What about the rest of you? What's your experience with lesbians? While my social circle including my own family members have been able to seduce lesbians before, we're too small of a group to be able to codify our experiences into a larger trend.

TL;DR: Fucked a bunch of lesbians; started seeing patterns. Want to know what others have experienced or observed regarding these women.