Here is my verify list.

Step 1 Call their work or go there and ask for him. It doesn’t matter what you say on the phone- you need to verify this guy works there verify phone number here too.

Step 2 You can call up a university or trade organisation and and verify the person attended/is registered CURRENTLY.

Step 3. Ask a man detailed complicated questions on his sailing, art, writing or travel hobby. Questions that only someone who participated in this hobby can answer. It sounds silly but this one is HUGE.

Step 4. LVM dad. Verify the parents story as well. I’ve had an ex tell me his dad was a businessman with two degrees. The dad was long term unemployed. Very LVM dad even negged me! I was like well, this explains your son.

Step 5. Pee test via drug test strips and check what meds are in the cupboards. Chronic long term use of intravenous drugs happens in rich homes and poor homes. If the guy is rich fun and nice & you can’t work out why he is stalling it can be this.

Step 6: check his address on his license matches his house. Check his flat is not an air bnb that he rents for hookups while his wife goes to Yoga. Check his name on his license is same as social media. Look up the house deed registration- some men tell you they’re so well off own this own that- they rent & never had never will own. Map search his address as stated on his license and check it is not an office or warehouse or his grandmas house. If he has a bill lying around see that it has HIS name on it.

Military level search: get your friend who works at bank or phone company to type his phone number into the data base and check that it is match TO HIS NAME. If a different number shows up then call it. Some men have two phones.

I checked once and the number belonged to a Jeremy, not Jared, and I searched the name on Facebook and it came up with his face with his wife in the profile photo.

As women we are socialised to not ask, smoke agree don’t rock the boat. We don’t feel like we deserve to know but it’s our body it’s our soul we 100% deserve to know.