There’s a myth floating around the manosphere about the “good alpha.” A guy who’s hot, charming, successful, interesting, smart, funny, and most important of all, a great leader. Not a fake Red Pill alpha, but a real alpha. A guy who isn’t just out for himself, but a guy who genuinely cares about others, brings others up, and makes others feel good. A perfect-ten human.
These real alphas, who were most often born and raised that way and never needed a creepy internet cult like us to learn how to be men, are admirably human, and the complete opposite of everything we evil Red Pillers teach. They’re not aloof and indifferent – they’re engaging, compassionate, and concerned! They don’t stonewall and tease – they earnestly communicate! They’re not stoic and emotionless – they’re open and honest and their emotions captivate you and make you like them even more! And they’re not perfect – they’re human, but they own their flaws and mistakes and admit them readily, because that’s being a real man.
I’ve actually never met a man like this, but I hear about them all the time. Mostly from women. So many women think they’re dating awesome guys. Six months later, I’m usually told that these guys turn into assholes. Nobody ever seems to say, “I was wrong. I misjudged him. I was stupid and horny and just pretending to see what I wanted to see.” No, it’s always the guy who changed somehow, or who manipulated and tricked that poor girl. She wasn’t wrong, he was. But don’t worry, because she’s already met another guy who’s ten times better than the last one, and he’s a real man, per my paragraph above this one. I’m crossing my fingers for her.
Somehow, the myth of the good alpha has leaked into the manosphere from that flat planet at the center-of-the-universe where women live as all the stars rotate about them. Men, and boys slowly becoming men, right here among us, are advocating the path of righteousness. Being an upstanding mensch, a leader-among-men, a guy who’s honest and in touch with his feelings but still a man, a guy who owns his mistakes and admits his weaknesses, and a man who loves women earnestly and cares about them and isn’t afraid to take a risk on love as long as he has a few standards and isn’t just falling all over any girl who doesn’t slap him. A guy who’s goal is to be a perfect combination of attractive manly characteristics (e.g., alpha), and supportive comfort-building characteristics (e.g., beta), destined for marriage one day when he finds the right woman and can be everything she needs.
Here at The Red Pill, we’re already aware of that guy. We even have a name for him: blue pill.
Here’s the deal: Women are not your enemy. They are not the other team. They are not against you. They are not trying to exploit you or manipulate you. They’re just out for themselves, same as you. Sometimes, being out for themselves is going to run contrary to what you want for yourself. Sometimes, your goals will align, at least a little bit, and it almost feels like you have a teammate. But you don’t. Because you want what you want and she wants what she wants. And if one of you sacrifices what you want that’s not going to make the other person necessarily do the same.
While women aren’t your enemy, they’re definitely not on your side either. They’re not your friends, they’re not your confidants, they’re not your safe havens, they’re not your respite. Not even your wife or girlfriend. She’s not on your side either.
Do you know why women watch Jerry Springer, reality TV, Judge Judy, and whatever the fuck else is out there airing the dregs of humanity, while reading tabloids explaining in graphic detail how celebrities and the royal family are every bit as fucked up and human as we are? Because people like seeing weakness in others. It makes them feel better about themselves without having to make any effort to actually be better.
When your woman is feeling low, she’ll try to access your “human” side, whether that’s trying to make you angry, trying to make you sad, trying to make you horny, trying to make you apologize or admit something – she wants you to reveal a chink in your armor, because she feels bad about herself and needs you to look more human so she knows she’s still good enough for you. That chink in your armor means she still has some control over you.
It’s a difficult and misleading situation, because she likes to feel that way. It makes her feel good, even happy for a bit. And you care about her, so you want her to feel good and happy for a bit. And you want to open up a little bit for her and let your guard down a bit, because it feels good to be accepted and validated.
But The Red Pill figured out something that you don’t want to accept--The hardest part of this whole thing for you to swallow: Affection is not the same thing as attraction. Women don’t want to fuck weak men, even if they like them. They say they do – hell, just look around Reddit. Reddit is apparently the single largest bastion of special snowflakes in the world. If you take women at their word, Reddit’s chock-full of women with exceptionally high libidos who soak through their panties every five minutes thinking about their skinny, laid back, underachieving, nerdy, overemotional boyfriends that can barely keep up with them sexually.
I’ve never met a woman like this, but I hear about them all the time. Mostly from women. Scroll up to the third paragraph of this post to see what I might think about that.
If you want a friend, make a friend. A guy friend. But if you want a girlfriend who’s eager to please you and wants to fuck your brains out, don’t treat her like a friend, or that’s all she’ll be.
If you want to communicate about real issues, discuss ideas, discuss improving yourself, and talk about how you feel, find a guy friend that you admire and want to learn from.
If you need to cry, lock the door. If you’re injured, disabled, have cancer or a mental illness – that’s between you and your doctor. Hell, join a support group and meet guys.
But when you’re sitting next to a woman you care about, never show weakness. It’s a trap. You’ll make her like you, but you’ll make her fuck me.
Society has been telling men for nearly 20 years that they want them to be sensitive, emotionally available, connected to their partner, etc. And what's the end result? A dead bedroom, a divorce, and your ex-wife finding "a real man" to fuck her brains out while you pay child support/alimony to a woman who thinks you're pathetic and children you don't get to see.
Not convinced? Check out this feminist article "Why Great Husbands are Being Abandoned" stating the exact opposite of what society has been telling men for two decades:
Isn't that great? Your ex-wife thinks you're wonderful, respects you, and she even loves you. She just doesn't want to fuck you. Ever. After trying you, she's realized what she really wants: A "man's man."
In that Huff Post article, the woman actually makes a key insight. I felt like she was touching the truth for a moment here:
…if only she had continued along this like of thought, she would have basically ended up at TRP.
Women don't respect you because you're manly. They respect you because they're attracted to you.
Their arrogant mistake was thinking they can control what they're attracted to. That's why they tell you to just see past the unwashed fat girl with the skin condition and the scraggly hair and enjoy her personality. Just like women do for men.
I've never met a woman who actually does that, but I hear about them all the time. Mostly from women.
Men are aroused mostly by a women's physical attractiveness. While women are aroused mostly by an alpha frame. Hence you often see guys punching well above their weight but almost never ugly women in similar situations.
You'd be surprised. There are some serious ugly girls who, in a logical world, would go home alone every night just like the loser guys. But as long as they're willing to say yes, some chump will fuck them. Ten years later, they won't give a loser man a chance because they're used to fucking slightly better than losers, even though they were just a pump and dump to those guys.
In cases of ONS that's true however I was more talking about relationships. Some women pull it off sure but I'm willing to bet a lot more men do. But I could be wrong.
If a good-looking man is with an ugly woman, he probably has self-esteem issues and people assume the worst about him.
An ugly women who appears to be "punching above her weight" is, in practice of this overacheivement, no longer punching above her weight because of how bad she makes him look.
Woman have this amazing flexibility in what they're attracted to. Mr. Beta Bob can be a BP as fuck husband but by developing an Alpha mindset he can make her attracted to him again. This mindset set can make the difference between a 2 and an 8 for women.
Men aren't as flexible. If she's fat and and ugly it will take a lot more than a mindset to change her attractiveness in our eyes.
Woman fundamentally understand that any perfect man they meet can instantly become unattractive with just a couple of words.
It's their projection of that among other things, that makes them shame you for not finding an unwashed fat girl with the skin condition and the scraggly hair attractive.
Edit: Autocorrect we meet again
Yeah. Right around 29 or so, the nerdy guy she wouldn't look twice at in high school suddenly becomes her soul mate when she realizes how much he's grown since he was 18, how much she values responsibility, industriousness, and how totally hawt a good career is.
She isn't being flexible - she isn't doing anything, he is the one changing himself to become attractive. TRP shows us quite clearly that women are not flexible about what they are attracted to.
Fickle is the word you were looking for, not flexible. Women are fickle.
This is exactly why the Gold Digger prank and the Fame Digger prank actually happened.
City/suburban women, more often? I find this kind of bullshit among city or suburban women in my peer group (19+ years old), not nearly as often in country, rural, or older women.
lmao can you make that your signature?
I've never a woman like this, but I hear about them all the time. Mostly from women. ---Archwinger.
When I hit rock bottom, the women who called themselves my friends were the first to leave the ship. The women who were attracted to me helped. They eventually lost the attraction because I was being unattractive but they were the only one who helped in the first place (my "friends" didn't even have a nice WORD for me, they instead began badmouthing me and stabbing me in the back. After all I did for them. This is the day when I decided I would never do anything for a woman anymore).
"They respect you because they're attracted to you."
I am sorry. Isn't this the other way around?
A little from column A, a little from column B. Try acting respectable when you're fat, dressed poorly, and have a crappy hair style.
Another way of saying it is, they only respect you if they are attracted to you.
She was heading down that road then bailed out at the last moment after she realized she was basically claiming AF/BB. Seemed to me she wanted some mutant Beta Fucks. Good luck with that. Wouldn't the world be happier if 5/10 women just stuck to the 5/10 men instead of saturating the top 20% market?
Part of the problem is that most girls are in the top 20% when they're 17-21. And the top 20% of guys are willing to fuck them until they slip down to the 50th percentile when they turn 25.
So it's not really the girls fault for not appraising their value- guys are giving them in accurate feedback
To add to that, I just want to mention my own experience.
In my life and work, I get to know a lot of people. Whenever I meet a guy who's really nice, awesome to hang out with, and just overall a good friend and person, he always has problems with women. He can never get laid.
Whenever I meet a guy who's a jerk, who is so awful you don't even want to spend 5 minutes in a room alone with, he has absolutely no problem with women. Like zero.
It's almost uncanny just how often this happens.
So true. When they do finally "find someone and settle down", the relationship tends to be... "asymmetrical", as in she's a bridge troll.
My best friend did this. Was a virgin until his late 20's and married the first girl who fucked him. She treats him like a child, literally. If we make plans to go grab a few beers, she insists on dropping him off and picking him up. He has to ask for permission before he can make plans. If he gets a 3 day weekend, that means he's going to spend it visiting her parents.
It's fucking pathetic, but he'll eventually figure things out the hard way and I'll be there to help him pick up the pieces.
Why not let him know how the relationship looks from your perspective and clue him in on what's wrong with it?
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Not a good plan. Never works.
Most people are completely unprepared to be unplugged. It's hard enough when you take the red pill willingly.
Oh god, I hate seeing that. I lose any shred of respect I had for the bros virtues when I see his mate selection and low-status in the relationship.
On the surface, I see some deviation from this, but not really. Whenever I meet these guys, if they are getting laid, it's with women solidly below them in terms of physical attractiveness (e.g. muscular men with good facial aesthetics dating a plain 6). Behavior can make all the difference for men, as most of us know already.
I don't know...you can be all that (the good stuff), but at the same time you lay down the law. Admittedly I play with a stacked deck. I'm 6'5", white, lift 5 days a week, 25 years old, and make 70K a year (Mechanical Engineer). Basically what a lot of women call their perfect guy. I didn't work for the height or facial features though, but I could have easily squandered them as I've seen so many others.
I'd like to think I "try" be the BEST 'MAN" i can be. This just draws women towards me. I lead groups, take charge; but try not to belittle the betas (they have it hard enough lol) I'll lift them up (within reason of course). This makes me the center of attention and the man everyone wants to be around (lots of friends).
As far as women go, I hold frame, take ZERO shit, and treat them decent-ish. Yeah, if i read a girl and she wants to fuck the bad guy...I can play that card for a night...but the bitch asked for it. I use abundance mentality and dread game when needed...and i find i almost never have to resort to anything else. Yeah, i hit a genetic lottery (cock and all), but it still can be done. Idunno reading this I sound full of myself, but since I decided I was going to be the BEST "man" I could be, life rlly has built my confidence through the roof. I found TRP and immediately gravitated towards it because of the emphasis on self improvement, not anger.
I have a hard time believing this from someone who would completely copy/fabricate a story to gain attention on another sub.
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Your "brother" called you his friend. While he might technically be my friend, I wouldn't refer to him that way, as opposed to "brother"
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You gotta love how bitches can have their cake and eat it too in this country. They get to fuck whoever they want and even if the bf/hubby tried to stop it, "well fuck you, get out of 'my' house and I'll be expecting my check(s) in the mail."
AF/BB is now legally enforceable
It has been since the 70's, we have just started noticing it in the last few years.
We understand what's going on now. Partly TRP, partly internet, partly women being more open about it.
It's time it ended.
To give it a personal touch, back when I was firmly rooted as a BP a girl once told me "you will make a great husband but not a good boyfriend". That sentence has ever since stuck with me. That was when I realised what girls saw in me. Provider. Thats it. I was an emotional dumping ground where they could come and talk how hard it is to be with their alpha boyfriend and how they totally want to leave them but just cant. Shit I was shit. At least now im on the path of self improvement. I cringe whenever I think of that moment.
Been there before, mate. Not fully out of it yet.
I've heard a girl say that to a good friend of mine a couple of years ago when she met him.
He's a great guy. Very smart, decent looks, 6'4'', but at the time he was beta as fuck and caught severe oneitis for this behemoth.
She was chubby, good face, great tits, daddy issues, and she had no prospects whatsoever. A liberal arts degree from a shitty university.
He would've given up everything for her at the time, because he was in love.
Fast forward to today: he's currently finishing his PhD at a top 5 university in the world and already has jobs lined up at Fortune 50 companies. She's stuck in a menial job.
But at least she got to ride the carousel for a few more years!
Yeah thankfully the girl who said this to me I didnt hang around her after this. Got the fuck out of there
I wholeheartedly agree. A girl I liked in high school once told me "I like you, Insipid_Xerxes. I could see myself marrying someone like you someday." That was four to five years ago. She has two kids with a guy who has had troubles with the law now. I've been working on myself ever since. It's a constant process.
Yes, that there is the mind set. She could marry you, but not be in a relation (girlfriend or otherwise). Because while people like you and me are great for providing and caring post-wall, at that time we arent the "show piece" they are looking for
You have to appreciate the fact that she was honest.
It was more as a slap on the face comment, but I am glad she said it.
To the casual observer this seems all rather deliberate. To an alien capable of logical thought he would reach the same conclusion upon seeing gender relations in the West. It's very hard to not return to the anger phase to a certain degree when we see these news articles highlighting that which is a huge coincidence in the way Women act similarly at best, and at worst the thought that this is all being done in concert and collusion, led by a magnificent fucklord of an orchestrator.
Oh, way longer. This really started hitting in the late 60's, and became a huge theme in the 70's. Not with the cocaine and disco crowd, so much as the counter-culture.
And of course the cocaine and disco crowd was scapegoated in the "fall of family values" when in reality it was the feminists who launched the primary attack.
Sigmund Freud warned his woman of the dangers of a big strong man on cocaine ravishing her (he was referring to himself). Fun fact.
androgynous men were stealing their good girls? more like picking up discarded scraps
Thanks for posting that archive. It helps me with reprogramming. This coercive programming towards the feminized man is ever pervasive. It reflects on every man. TRP!
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If I was that guy I wouldn't want to meet someone else. Just plates or MGTOW.
This kind of leadership is not a characteristic of a leader. It's a characteristic of a particular relationship between one particular leader, and one or more followers, in a given situation.
The what is being described here is not a different style of leadership, but a particular relationship where positivity dominates, as a result of successful leadership. This is an effect, not a cause.
A patriarch who is firmly in control of his household, and is automatically respected and obeyed, has more leeway to be positive, open, honest, benevolent, straightforward. This is an effect of his greater leadership skills, but only insofar as he makes it possible by creating order, harmony, and cooperation, using Machiavellian means if necessary.
This is also why many of the dating tactics of the past, which we explicitly reject ("gentlemanly" behaviour, flowers, etc) came about... they are artifacts of a gentler time, when men were not seen as low-value by default... and thus they could demonstrate more emotional investment without having it taken for thirsty desperation.
TL;DR: The "good alpha" that women idealize is precisely the animal they hunted to the brink of extinction. When masculinity is welcomed with less hostility, only then will masculinity be less hostile.
Yes sir. This relates to the point I want to make, which is a counter or at least an addendum to OP's argument...
My TLDR - If the relationship context is solidly in your favor, in which both parties know you are clearly above her in the power dynamic, you have little or nothing to fear from occasional doses of beta.
I have "opened up" and shown a lot of emotion to GFs in the past, in particular some of my weakest, most vulnerable, depressed and miserable moments, and I suffered no ill consequences for doing so.
In fact, I think it was good for both of us. They helped me get through some tough times... in particular one ex-GF who helped me get through the toughest period of my life and without whom I don't know if I would have made it. And these girls ate it up, they were eager to play the motherly nurturing role and from what I can tell became more smitten with me afterwards, not less.
HOWEVER, I do not think this is because I'm a magnet for special snowflakes. What has not been discussed yet in either my post or OP's is context.
The context of my LTRs has been one in which the girls were more invested than I was, in which the girls were more into me and into the relationship than I was into them or into the relationship. If they had left, I could have found another equally attractive girl to take their spot very quickly, and we both knew this. My SMV was at least equal to theirs, more likely higher in all cases. And there was never any question about who wore the pants in any of these relationships.
That being the context, there really was no danger in me occasionally "showing some beta." In fact, as I said I think they honestly liked it, they enjoyed the chance to be motherly for a change. (Key point there being that it was a change, that it was an occasional temporary departure from the norm.)
OP's advice (the standard TRP advice on this topic) does not get into relationship context because it is meant to be general, it is meant to be a "better safe than sorry" generalized rule of thumb. And I wouldn't disagree with that.
What I'm saying though is that the danger that comes with showing weakness or vulnerability only exists in a relationship context where the girl has a low opinion of you or is on the fence about you. If the relationship context is solidly in your favor, in which both parties know you are clearly above her in the power dynamic, you have little or nothing to fear from occasional doses of beta.
If the power dynamic is unclear, if you think you might not have an accurate assessment of the relationship context, or if you think there is any possibility that your girl is merely on the fence about you, then yes it is better to be safe than sorry and you should follow the standard advice and remain stoic.
Excellent points both from Whisper and RedHeimdall. I've experienced deeper bonding over sharing genuine life challenges with quality women, and also what felt like heartfelt moments turned against me by petty, small-minded women of insecure and poor character.
When considering an LTR, I've found a useful test before opening up about serious matters. Confess some petty vulnerability or minor peccadillo, and see if it gets used by her to mutually increase intimacy with you, or turns it against you which will happen sooner rather than later. Don't be fooled by the minor content of the chosen subject matter; consider it a strong sign of how she will handle more serious life matters, and an important indicator of her character.
This is incredibly insightful.
Women only see the results not the actions that lead there, and assume the results they see are what created the situation.
Without respect there is no love, but respect has to come first, even between male friendships.
That's why Rollo says that women want a man the "Just Gets It".
"I hear about them all the time. Mostly from women."
You could sum up plugged-in thought with that one phrase. Hell, we could probably make a meme out of it.
"Women love men who do the dishes and vacuum the carpets!"
I hear about these women all the time. Mostly from women.
Women do love men who do the dishes and vacuum the carpet.
In the same sense that I love wild-caught salmon with soy-miso glaze, or my favorite pair of shoes.
And ironically enough, if your a do the dishes and vacuum the carpet guy, the way she fucks you, it will be like fucking a dead wet fish.
studies have shown that the divorce rates are higher in couples where housework is split equally between the man and the woman, and div rate is even higher in couples where the man did all the housework.
women can't respect a guy who is doing something womanly, it's as simple as that. Even if they don't realize it, it's what happens. They don't want to fuck a maid, they don't want to fuck another woman. They want to fuck a man, and men don't waste time going around dusting bookshelves and shit.
What a great piece of evidence to suggest straying from gender roles is a bad plan. Can you find the source?
don't know about divorce, but it is it is inversely correlated with sex frequency http://www.asanet.org/journals/ASR/Feb13ASRFeature.pdf
Exactly. I love these things, but I don't want to fuck them.
That's probably why betas wait for things to happen to them. They'll meet the girl. The girl will turn around and love him. They just have to stick to their principles. They have this vivid view of an abstract concept. That concept is so omnipresent in the feminist narrative that it must just be an enormous stroke of luck that the poor beta hasn't run into one. It must be very rare that someone never meets those women. Surely he's the anomaly and it's incredibly unlikely that it'll persist forever.
Hehe I seen somewhere on like one of those things you hang in the kitchen for laughs...
No Woman ever killed a man when he was doing the dishes
That's because he's the epitome of an unthreatening male. He inspires no strong feelings at all.
Because he does the dishes?
I've done the dishes because I'm bored but don't want to be socially irresponsible and leave a conversation. It's because I hate holding still and want to move and have noticed the most positive response is doing the dishes out of boredom. This has always been a part of who I am, to keep physically moving as part of my ADHD.
Is there really no room for someone to serve another in the red pill? I do the dishes because I fucking want clean dishes, or because I'm a guest in someone's house and it's the cheapest way to show appreciation. Why is that so beta?
It's not the "what", it's the "why". It's always the why that matters. If you're doing them because you want to, then it's a good thing. If you're doing them because she browbeat or whined you into doing it, it's a bad thing.
Studies have shown that marriages with even split or more housework done by the male have a higher divorce rate. I don't think it's the housework, though; I think it's the "why" of the housework.
I think that makes more sense. No, especially when she tells me to clean, then I hand the dishes off to her. It's a service out of kindness because that's how I function, I definitely do not do it because I'm commanded to.
Choreplay is a feminine operative social convention:
http://therationalmale.com/2013/01/30/choreplay/
It is the sex carrot indentured Blue Pill men are encouraged to believe in order to subjugate them.
This is a great meme already.
That's my new favorite one-liner
Yeah. I have a couple of plates now cleaning my place and doing gardening. They are very happy.
This is a very astute observation, and you've tied it together beautifully with the overarching theme of your post.
Sexual dimorphism has afforded women the luxury of choosing to be underachieving and lazy. She will always be valuable, even if she accomplishes nothing with her life, simply because she is the bottleneck in reproduction.
Men do not have this luxury. We must be constantly striving, constantly improving, and never revealing weakness or doubt, lest we appear or become inferior to our competition.
Another home run, /u/Archwinger.
These women might hold value but that doesn't mean they're happy. In fact, I'd say that lack of boundaries and a sense of any accomplishment in ones life might make someone incredibly unhappy.
They will never be truly respected by anyone. When they lose their good looks and people stop taking notice of them they will so discontented that they will destroy everything valuable to them and divorce their husbands.
They will become bitter and simple.
Great men are forged in fire through toil and torment. Remember that.
Women are getting more college degrees, so if you consider that an accomplishment, then they are achieving. I think that less attractive women are working harder than ever, and harder than they want to, but they don't really realize it.
Most of those degrees are in liberal arts. I don't consider that work.
Is it accomplishment, though? I would say, maybe not, but then again, many young men don't do anything more with their lives than that.
Best takeaway from the post is this:
The concept that a girl can genuinely like a man but not want him sexually is something that many BPillers don't grasp.
Ironically, when we were kids, girls told us all the time:
"Hey Stevredpill, I like you, but I don't like like you."
As always Archwinger, great post.
That's not ironic. In fact, it's the opposite. Point taken, nonetheless.
If I was a woman, I'd absolutely want men to reveal their weaknesses and sensitivities. So that those unfit individuals can be instinctively disqualified from mating as soon as possible by me.
Yes men, you should do it...it's very attractive to us women, also it's very attractive when men do the dishes without ever being asked and buy expensive things for their lady to surprise her. It's super panty-dropping sexy when a man takes on responsibility for his woman's children that aren't his blood, as though they were his own. Because they're part of her, and that's love. But remember that the most attractive trait is when a man knows his woman is always right and she always comes first.
Bitch, really? Goddamn they are hilariously adorable solipsists.
This all makes sense. One can't hate women for doing that, they are just taking advantage of idiots. That's what humans do anyway.
this is very true. when i went through chemo, my ex-gf was the one crying & i had to comfort her (!) but that bish still cheated on me when i was going through radiation. she saw me being weak & left me as soon as i got a clean bill of health.
now i never let on that i feel bad or that i'm sad about something. they have to force me to rest when i'm sick, then they turn into a good little nurse.
In a 12 month period when my mother died and then a guy who was like my brother died, I was at my weakest. I cried in front of my LTR. I asked her to help me through my depression and grief. Know how she responded? You guessed it; running into the arms of another man.
Even if people are dying, never cry in front of women. Weep in private.
Tears don't lubricate...they dry that pussy up faster than Ghandi's sandals.
It's because tears are salty and salt dehydrates. Fact.
The last time I heard from my (ex)gf, we were almost blackout drunk together and for some reason we were crying together... and i havent heard from her since
This is really true, and a good point. It also really sucks how few men grow up with fathers around, or have strong male role models. Then, when you're an adult, well, "guys don't talk about this stuff." It is almost as though men are being encouraged to share this stuff with girlfriends and wives, instead of family and male friends.
When I was down and depressed, I asked my gf of 2.5 years if she can take care of me for a month. He response was 'yes' and I felt so happy. But the next morning, she sent an email that she cannot be with me and cut all contact. That is how women are. We have to accept it.
Thats why i say that if she treats you like shit and acts like a bitch when you are sick wait for her to be sick and act the exact same way she did. If she bitches about that tell her your taking a page from her book.
That is vindictive, petty, and childish. You should have better things to do with your time. Just leave and forget. Next.
A friend who's got serious oneitis with a recent flame, had his grandmother die, and he posted constantly about how incredibly shitty she was to him during the process.
Then, after a few days, he apologized, and "everything is okay with my SO". In other words, he had no RP knowledge to explain why he should just next her, despite literally all his friends telling him he should. Anybody who's been or known betas in such situations, you know their projections onto their SO will excuse almost any bad behavior.
On the other hand, why throw someone out for being what they are (namely, female)?
It's his expectations that need a change, not the SO's behavior.
Because if you accept disrespect, you've lost frame. And that's pretty much absolute, no matter what the situation.
Who says he's really throwing her out? With sufficient frame, she'll want to come back, and will have gained his respect, and maybe even learned a little something about being a supportive woman.
But, now, he's lost her respect, lost frame, and shown disrespect toward himself and, frankly, to his nana.
Re-read. Nobody said he's throwing her out.
No, she didn't learn anything. His oneitis got the best of him. He's a weird BP guy who lifts, is a fantastic musician, and a fun guy, but he's got a fatal case of oneitis for whomever he is currently dating.
What would that accomplish? It will jeopardize the relationship for nothing.
It's not like she will rethink her life and not be a woman any more just because you're a little bitch to her.
Nice theory, but bear in mind that in socio-sexuality she automatically out ranks you. Her value is the uterus she acquired on day one
Because men and women are the same and acting butthurt and vindictive is attractive now?
The Bluepill Farm System:
1) Mom is an alpha widow who has now settled down with a beta-bux to raise a family. As she raises her son, her hamster has her teach him to be non-threatening to women. Through this she exorcises her alpha demons, her cthonic urge to be choked and dominated by someone who would never settle with, love or commit to her.
2) Dad, being beta, sets a poor example for his son.
3) Son emulates Mom and Dad's relationship when he enters the sexual world as a young man, he is submissive, deferential, meek and indecisive with the women he meets, he puts them on a pedestal, he operates from the conditioned fear Mom has instilled in him, from the example Dad has set: to never offend or humiliate or degrade or ignore or be supercilious to a woman.
4) At this point the road forks: Son may swallow the red pill and slowly, painfully unravel a lifetime of brainwashing to become successful with women -- or he may stay the course and wind up like Dad: in a sexless, unhappy marriage.
Sadly what you describe is the best case scenario. Most don't even have an imitation father figure.
This is the halo effect in action. Women will attribute what they consider to be good (or comfort-building as OP describes them) characteristics to men to whom they are attracted. The men who actually have these comfort-building characteristics? Ironically, women are not as attracted to them, so the men who actually have these characteristics won’t be gushed-over like the alphas.
Now you do need some comfort-building characteristics to make a LTR work, so that’s why many of these guys “turn into assholes” eventually. The ideal strategy for an alpha who wants an LTR is to appear pure alpha at the start and slowly introduce these comfort-building characteristics as they are needed long-term, especially during comfort shit tests.
That's because the alpha builds real comfort by destroying all hindrances in his path. Women don't want emotional security, they want you to build real physical security for them. Emotional security comes from knowing you won't be eaten by wolves
I see this as simple projection, and is exacerbated by oneitis (whether in a woman or a man). The problem with seeking "the one", is that when one meets a candidate, one will tend to aggressively interpret their behaviors as compliant with what one expects from "the one". And yes, in my experience, it takes about 6 months to discover (or, really, accept) the variances from that ideal.
This idea of a "good alpha" isn't the unicorn you seem to dance around calling it.
Something I learned about frame is that it's a poker face. Most people learn stoic and distant for their poker face because that's standard and easy and works for almost everyone. But if you ever watched Texas Holdem on the world series, you'll be familiar with a guy named Daniel Negreanu.
He's very outgoing and personable at the tables, but he doesn't show weakness, only searches for it in others. His poker face is hosting behind a carefully constructed wall of emotion and personality, and this works just as well, if not better than, the stoic eye averting norm. It's also a lot harder to pull off, but when it works, it works amazingly well.
Feel free to look up reruns if you need a visual.
Poker tells stem from either a lack of confidence or an overabundance of it. It's all about finding that equilibrium. If you are going to play a hand, be confident in it, but not so confident that you're unwilling to recognize and fold a losing hand.
I'm sure there's a red pill analogy in their somewhere.
I think that is the analogy.
Though in my limited experience on this sub most of the guys seem to go in for a "bang 'em and leave 'em" approach even on the losing prospects.
Yes! People should check this out. I think the best one is at 5:10, but the whole thing is worth checking out.
Totally agreed with not showing your weakness - don't do this guys. EVER.
Once I thought I felt in love and everything seemed to look perfect. She seemed to look perfect. I showed my weakness once and ask her for a support - not only did i not get it, but it also totally trashed her respect for me.
You are on your own in this journey, just face it, accept it and take joy from it.
One thing I ma not sure I agree is that part of being a friend to her. I would say that if you want a LTR you need to be a little friend (but from her perspective, never treat her as a friend, even if she will ask if you had a hard day).
Thanks for this post, good stuff!
I believe it's okay to admit to your SO that you had a rough day. But follow it by saying you wouldn't have it any other way though with a smirk. An alpha loves a challenge.
This is good. It shows how strong you can be.
This has been the weirdest thing for me about /r/askwomen and related subs. All of those women are ten years older than their spouses, have exceptionally high unsatisfiable libidos, make 5X has much as their SO, have a blog about sex toys, and still have time to get shit done in terms of hobbies and interests.
Unless of course, they're all lying sacks of projecting shit. They're not describing themselves or their ideal self. They're describing they're ideal spouse. The only ones women can truly respect are the strong alpha males so in order to climb to the pack of the all female pecking order of those subs, they pretend to be those strong alpha males and it's just weird as fuck. Sometimes I think circles of female friends are just beta orbiting each other. They can't respect each other for the same reason they can't respect beta males but they're endlessly supplicative to the point of trigger warnings, never disbelieving another's stories, and group think politics taking place within an echo chamber.
They constantly sit their with low self esteem because they know they'll never have that alpha male role they crave and it's ingrained deep within women's psyche to never accept anything other than the best. Despite having the easiest gender role imaginable, endless rights, and no significant amount of obligation, they can't have it as well as the men they fuck so they literally feel oppressed and spend they're days making shit up on the internet while kissing each other's asses endlessly.
A wise man will do anything in his power not to be that thing these women pretend they aren't. Their uterus allows them to get away with it but red pill men know better than to try and get away with it ourselves. Projecting their desires of what they want in a man, these women know better than to let each other know that they are what they are. Red pill men should be learning that lesson too. We cannot be what feminists refuse to let each other know they are. The only difference is that we actually need to succeed at differentiating ourselves from it because we're not getting a pussy pass.
Yeah, women always say this about themselves. They are all horny all the time and want to fuck all the time.
The real reason they're saying it is because they're so self-conscious and anxious of the tiny bit of sexual desire they do have. In their minds, this tiny flaw is amplified like a crazy person being obsessed with a barely visible scar on their face.
they are horny all the time. as in, If brad pitt or their favorite sports player walks in, all of a sudden they are horny. They are horny and want sex, just from the top 10 percent of guys. everyone else makes them dry as shit. Thats why everyone thinks women dont want sex.
Ya'll meet shitty women. I've been with tons of women that were horny all the time, literally all of the time. I've never been in a relationship where sex wasn't a daily given at a bare minimum, and even that was not enough for some of them.
The female body feels probably around 100x the sexual pleasure of the male body...why wouldn't they be horny all the time?
Hormones.
Autobot... I'm looking at you... roll out of my one word comment.
Except Jesus, of course. He's got a rich, powerful, handsome, royal daddy too.
Prince Charming Jesus is the ultimate woman's fantasy; which is why Christianity spread throughout the underworld of the Roman Empire. Its target market is people too uneducated to know anything about science, math, or philosophy. After all, what self-respecting woman wouldn't browbeat their husbands and give up 10% of their income for a chance to spend eternity with Him?
Really? A plain-looking celibate poor guy?
There is no surer way to end a properly sexual relationship than to show such weaknesses. Whether physical, mental, emotional, women will show "sympathy", and next you, sexually, pretty much immediately.
Even the most self-aware, RPW type will do this (I've experience with that one). Sorry, RPWs - but while the effort is appreciated, you still have those genetically embedded sexual needs and strategy.
I guess I must just be attractive as fuck, because I've only ever experienced the exact opposite of this supposed phenomenon.
Maybe ya'll should try fucking some higher quality women that aren't insecure degenerates?
In your experience showing weakness increased attraction?
Showing vulnerability definitely has, maybe always has.
Maybe it's hard to tell though. You wouldn't want to start off on your first date revealing something personal about yourself, but if a woman is already attracted to you because of other qualities, and you choose to share something that is painful to you from inside yourself? I have never experienced anything other than a woman becoming more attracted to me after doing so.
This should align with orthodox TRP in a lot of ways...women are nurturing. Why wouldn't they increase their attraction and bond to someone showing vulnerability?
No. The only thing sexy about a weakness in a man, is that he overcame it.
If you're sitting with a woman and relating things that happened to you in the past that were painful, then by definition you overcame them lol If not, you would just be dead.
I generally agree. Speaking about a hard experience that you've overcome, in a logical way is frame. "I don't wanna talk about it," while your voice quivers, isn't.
I think people have a sort of binary understanding of what is going on here. Your post shows the necessary nuance, I think.
Is anyone else tired of living like this? Who the hell wants to be stoic; emotionless? No one. Don't be if you don't want to be. Just make sure you tell your woman that it's the way you want your relationship to go.
I know a guy who's 100% alpha but he likes to be a nice guy. It's enjoyable for him. Rather, he doesn't like being a shit person. His SO originally did not like this as she probably interpreted it as weakness. He sat her down one day and told her that this is how the relationship was going to go. That he enjoyed being nice and caring for her and if she was going to be immature about it then she could leave.
The most attractive quality to a woman is a man who does what he wants to do and doesn't take BS for doing it. You can still be a human and be Red Pill. You can still be human and get women.
Being stoic only works so well because it's what women think is alpha. If you tell her your ways are alpha and take control, then she will think your ways are alpha.
Being nice is fine. Being frequently vulnerable isn't. Now, I don't buy into the RP overkill concept that if you shed a single tear in front of a woman she'll immediately lose all attraction and run off to fuck Chad Thundercock. There are instances where not showing emotion is frankly creepy. If your mother dies and you show a moment of humanity in front of a female you're fucking, everything will be fine. Women are attracted to men, not zombies.
They don't mind seeing your weakness. They don't want to be dependant on them.
Besides the death of a nearby friend/family member, why else would you cry? IMHO if you cry for any reason other than the one mentioned above women will deem you weak.
Maybe crying after having an epiphany or reading religious text? But then again I wouldn't cry if I was aware the presence of another human being while reading such texts.
Stoic works and is advocated because 99% of guys are taught to be emotional whores and a dose of stoicism is the solution.
Women subconsciously assess it as alpha. There is no conscious decision making in genuine attraction. You're not going to reason your way into alternatives.
Women can be attracted to nice men, but only if it's coming from a position of power. That's also quite different from showing weakness or vulnerability, which are far more likely to annihilate attraction.
Pretty much this.
Really, I think this post is bullshit. Why? Well like so many other posts here, this totally frames the value of a man and his "alphaness" around women rather than the man himself. Even worse, it frames how a man should act around women's feelings. Since when do women's feelings about men's feeling take precedence over those men's actual feelings? Basically, it says "be stoic and emotionless because women won't like you if you're too weak. Men who are open with themselves emotionally are just beta." Really, OP just misses the distinction between the concept of the "good alpha" he talks about and a "red pill-alpha". The "good alpha", "true man", or whatever else you want to call it is alpha because that's how HE likes to be. It has nothing to do with women or how they treat him. The kind of alpha that OP endorses is all framed around finding validation from women, by being someone that it's tiring to be.
Real alphas don't have to hide their feelings, they either exercise control over them or accept them. Either way, they don't bottle them inside just to be successful with chicks.
From personal experience, your friend did the right thing. When opening up to girls about your feelings how you frame it is what's important. Yeah, you don't say "I'm so vulnerable blah blah", you say "This is how I feel, you can accept it or not but I'm going to own it either way."
I understand what you're saying, but you might be missing the target market of the advice here.
Many of the guys reading struggle with frame and maintaining mindset. Saying "Fake it until you make it" is more valuable to them as advice than "This comes to self-actualized men automatically."
I agree, and can relate, with this comment more than any others here.
From my experience, the Alpha / RedPill mindset is flawless during the initial stages of attracting a woman and/or maintaining relationships with "fuck buddies". That said, if there comes a point in time when you are contemplating a serious relationship with a girl, you have to show your interest in keeping that relationship while still maintaining your dominance.
The latter statement is the most common mistake I always made when I used to date. I would get soft and let my guard down as soon as the relationship started to develop. This caused the girl to question being with me (Obviously out of weakness), and ultimately end the relationship.
Exactly. Spot on.
I had a conversation about this with my brother not too long ago and we basically came up with the exact conclusion as you just stated. The beginning stages are definitely where you need to prove that you're alpha. After that your girl is going to want to see some human in you.
You dont have to be stoic with everyone. You can have a trusted circle. It just can't be weak betas, men who want to fuck your women, your plates/ltr, your boss or your mom. Get a strong male counselor. Find a mentor, drink brews with your bros.
But screw it up and you'll soon find men fucking your women, while you pay for their children and no hope of getting out of the home you've made.
If you think being stoic is equal to being emotionless then I don't think you really understand the concept. Everyone experiences emotions. That fact is undeniable. It's how we choose to interpret those emotions and how we react to them is what matters.
I practice Stoicism because I strive to maintain a calm state of mind, control what I can and remain indifferent to what I cannot. It makes me a stronger person and life in general easier. No, I'm not tired of it one bit.
You’ll make her like you, but you’ll make her fuck me.
This line is GOLD
If that line was in a movie trailer, I think I would see it.
I'm picturing late 90's Brad Pitt delivering this line while casually eating an apple or something.
I can see the trailer - "The Artist" (as in pick-up artist). A dark comedy about women.
Why receive her emotional affections, when you can experience her sexual indiscretions.
Why receive her emotional affections, when you can experience her sexual indiscretions.
Reminds me of the Book of Pook:
A servant you'll be, a friend she'll see.
Respect is all.
I've been that person so many times. That's a great way to put it.
Seen this so many times in my relationships. I'm getting better at not playing into it. I'm gonna have to put that in the sidebar of my head!
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from your story i am thinking he was taught never to show weakness. if that guy had have been raised in the projects of south central to crackhead parents i doubt he would have been such "a natural"
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I love the downvote.
"It's not luck, brah! You just gotta lift and maintain frame, brah!"
Is Animal Farm still on High School curriculums? It really should be. Then again, with how things are going, I wouldn't at all be surprised if it has been removed.
I read Animal Farm at a charter school in 8th grade and How to Kill a Mocking Bird, The Crucible, Beowulf, and others in high school. That was almost a decade ago. I have no clue what's going on with the public education system now.
Unfortunately the poor are rewarded for showing weakness. The weakest, poorest, most downtrodden get the best govt help.
I saw a documentary where a guy was excited he had got AIDS-- it meant the govt would pay for his healthcare and housing...
up is down, black is white and 2+2=5 in the consensus reality
I was groomed to be just like that. But I dropped out of college to do a web startup and fucked my career up pretty thoroughly.
Don't be like me, kids!
Women describing a manicorn.
I have. They stopped being produced a long time ago. I think most of them came from the WW1 and 2 eras. My grandfather was one of them. He was that guy. He could be compassionate and understanding and gentle, but was also the same guy that had on multiple occasions beat the hell out of shitty guys with a baseball bat who were creeping on my mom when she was younger. He was rich in character. I honestly strive to be like him. Cool headed, and deliberate in everything I do. Gentle when needing to be, and alpha as fuck as needed.
The difference between those types back then and alphas today, they were raised to be alpha. Their work ethic, how they talked to women, and how they treated others was instilled at a young age by other alphas. Most now just go through the motions to be perceived as alpha. I've seen some people in here who confuse being a jerk, with being an alpha. There's a very thin line though, between being a caregiver that has a gentle side and being a whiny little bitch, and that's what I for the most part think TRP tries to separate. Don't be a "bro" just to be alpha. Be something more, someone that is versatile, and can be everything. Well dressed, in shape, hard worker, provider, and emotionless. But also be understanding.
He was a ladies man. He was a mans man. Well dressed. Well liked. Without being a douche. Without being a pussy.
That's the difference between then and now. Now you're either too much of a douche or too much of a pussy. I like to think I fall right in the middle. I can say very little to get a woman to want to spend time with me and give it up. I don't have to be condescending.
My thoughts exactly. My grandfather was incredibly kind, compassionate, and had no problem showing his sensitive side. He treated my Grandmother like his Queen, but you could do that back then and still be seen as wholly Alpha. He was 6'8, handsome as fuck, built like a tank,well educated, and a spectacular athlete. But he was also a huge sappy family man who insisted on adopting 6 kids before having a few more of their own. I've never met a man who commanded so much respect from everyone and my Grandmother had Doe eyes for him until the day he died.
He had built in advantages most men will never have, but he could also show a side that men today can't afford to show their spouses. It's a shame that feminism and lies perpetuated by the media and pop culture have completely ruined the male/female dynamic for both sexes. Our grandparent's generation had it right.
I completely agree. My grandfather was in signals during ww2. Worked as a telephone lineman for 50 years for Michigan Bell (climbed and installed telephone poles) back when those types of jobs were compensated better than most office jobs. He was pretty much my only father figure in life. Just an example of how well he took care of my grandmother, when he passed we had to teach her how to pump gas. She never wanted for anything. He was, the quintessential "man of the house". All she had to do was exist and be happy and that was enough for him. She also worked her entire life and retired as well. Gold digging women are more atrocious these days. 50+ years married. When he passed, there must have been 300 people at his funeral. People we never knew existed. He made an impact wherever he went and didn't have to gloat about what he had done or what he had. Growing up in the Great Depression and being in Germany and the Czech during WW2 does that to people. Something most people from my moms era, my era, and the extremely self entitled little brats these days will never understand. As time goes on it only gets worse though. Hell, I went through basic in the Army just before the kinder gentler Army started up. When your military has to sensitize itself to conform to the whiny little internet brats born in the late 80's and beyond it's pretty fucking sad.
I could rant and rave all day, won't change anything. I often think I was born in the wrong era. I always imagine what it would be like to be in the 30's and 40's in a speak easy wearing a fedora (not a trilby) and a pin striped suit smoking a cigar and sipping on a neat whiskey while some dame sings in the back ground. You can't get more fucking alpha than that. Not today.
Care to fill me in on what the military was like back then? My grandfather suggested that, if I join the military, I should join the Marine Corps. An acquaintance of mine told me that, when he went to sign up for the Marine Corps, it was a room full of "jar-heads." I'm guessing that things have significantly changed between now and then. Then again, the acquaintance is from Missouri and my grandfather is from Louisiana.
TL;DR - Would you want someone that couldn't handle being cussed at in basic standing next to you while thousands of rounds are being fired at you?
First and foremost, the intensity and how you're treated in the military is dependent on the MOS, and it's easy to assume which roles are hit the hardest in basic. Infantry, either ground or mechanized which are specific to the Army and the USMC are going to be more intense. The entire goal is to break you down and rebuild you so that in a combat situation where 20 men are shooting at 5 of you, you don't freak out and run away leaving your battle buddies to fend for yourself. The rule of thumb is that we're trained to be able to overcome 4:1 odds. 1 guy vs 4 guys, 1 squad of 5 vs 20 guys, 1 platoon of 20 vs 80. And so on and so on. I joined in 98 and outside of combat MOS they had already started sensitizing the military. The first was no more insults or swearing at soldiers. I think that one started 3/4 of the way through basic for me. We all laughed and so did our drill SGTs and they ignored the order and continued on business as usual. As they should.
My graduating company out of basic training in Fort Benning was the last class to graduate without female trainees on base. It may seem like a small issue, but I'll get to that later.
There was more emphasis being put on soldiers feelings. And preventing suicides, which there are a lot of fake injuries to get out, and some suicides but not as many as the rumor mill would produce. Everyone started wanting to be treated as individuals, with feelings instead of actual soldiers.
Now. With that said, you might ask "well, what's so wrong with that".
In most MOS's and different branches of the military things work a little different. If you're in the rear filing paperwork or a cook or another MOS that rarely receives bullets or mortar fire, that's fine. I wouldn't expect them to be hardened soldiers ready for combat at a moments notice. But lets get back to where it hurts the most, I'll use the Army as an example since it is my personal experience but applies to the Marines as well as they are quite comparable.
I was an 11b. Combat infantry. Rangers are 11b's who were selected at their duty station to go to rangers school. Green Berets. 90% of the soldiers you see in the Army or the Marines in the news or in movies storming buildings, in HUMVEES, sitting in blackhawks being transported are combat infantrymen. They eat the bullets and do the killing. When we put "boots on the ground", that's who we're putting on the front line. 11m are infantry as well, they're heavy armor infantrymen. Same as 11b, only after basic their AIT moves on to tanks. They're the mechanized infantry. That is the core of the USMC and the Army. Every Army installation is named after a mechanized or ground infantry or air assault (infantry repelling from blackhawks or jumping out of planes) unit.
I'm not saying they are any more important than any other MOS, as they all serve a purpose to contribute to the final objective, however infantryman for the longest time carried out the prime directive.
There's approximately 1.2 million Army personnel currently. Roughly 15-20% of that is combat arms or infantry. That's a huge percentage when you take into account there are approximately 300 different MOS's in the Army, 4 of those attributed to combat MOS's.
Now, here's where the kinder gentler Army that started showing up at duty stations around 99 and beyond started to affect people like me and the military as a whole.
Knowing how imperative it is to have a well trained combat arms soldier, think of all the things he's going to encounter if he sees action. Murder, death, children being shot, mass graves, friends heads exploding a foot or less away from him. High levels of stress, anxiety, depression. You've seen the documentaries. You've seen the movies that hardly portray the atrocities of war. Combat MOS's see those up front and personal on a regular basis in wartime. They are the killers, and the "saviors". You don't want someone that had it "easy" in basic training coming to your unit to have your back. You want them hardened, and almost numb to everything around them. All those stories you hear about the Army and USMC boot camp, those are primarily stories from combat MOS's. Most of the drill sgt's have seen combat, so they're entire job, their purpose is to completely break you down to nothing then rebuild you so that when you're on the front line, he knows if he's next to you he can trust you have his back and he has yours later down the road.
Now some effects that I've seen or have realized after being in the military in a combat MOS. With the mentioning of women training @ Fort Benning which for almost 100 years has served as the home of the infantry, and trained nothing but infantry until the late 90's. As a trainee, I(we) were told to never look at or speak to any women on base. Women work there, soldiers and civilians, but they are no where near the training areas. Sometimes we'd see them. And after a month in basic, I can assure you... you can smell the perfume across the street. It's not anything derogatory, it's to take away that distraction. If you're talking and thinking about that hot chick in uniform you saw the other day, you're not listening to the drill instructor teaching you something that can save your life, your friends life, or the squads life. Now with women training in the next barracks over, how many distractions do you think there are? How many guys might see a chick at the PX when picking up soap and deodorant and tooth paste and they realize, hey, we're in barracks next door to each other and they sneak out and get down and dirty. There's a reason why you're allowed nothing in basic. No candy. No tobacco. Only what they issue you and feed you.
Another effect that I actually witness first hand, we do live fire exercises. Everything from small scale with a company which is roughly 90 personnel. To live fire exercises that involve entire units, and other branches of the military. I can't explain how awesome it was to be on the big island of Hawaii assaulting a trench with jets flying overhead and shooting rockets at the bunkers and helo's 30 meters above me with dual 50's laying suppressive fire and the brass raining down on my k-pot. It's exhilarating and scary at the same time as EVERYONE has live rounds. One mistake, and a platoon could eat a rocket from a F16. And this is just training. And with active duty, it's a regular cycle. Some people can't handle it. They didn't used to make it through basic. They'd either off themselves, or they'd get injured, or the drill instructors would notice they were off and have them pack their things. Now, they primarily breeze right through. These are the guys like one that I knew that during a live fire exercise freak out, and in the middle of the night take their canteen and walk 10 miles back to their house because they're stressed out. They're also the same guys, who when are actually seeing live action, throw grenades in their buddies tents just so they can "get out of there" because they've got no other option (a few news stories back when we went into Iraq were just that, friendly fire). I've been in training missions where we were falling back to meet up with the rest of the platoon, and my buddies rifle was so hot from firing so many rounds that they literally cooked off, 1 went off and hit between my legs, another went off to the right of my foot, and when he dropped the mag and emptied the chamber to stop it, a 3rd hit the ground and went off, who knows where that shot towards. Most "normal" civilians can't handle that kind of stress. They freak out. And that's just training. That's not complete chaos storming a building with 30 men shooting and firing rockets back at you. And yet, people still make it through, and freak out. Do you want those people there with you?
I wouldn't call basic "hard". If you're a survivor, don't take things personally, and are ok being without your family for long periods of time... it's really not that difficult. Unless you're an idiot, or a smartass like me. If I enjoyed having every aspect of my life controlled, and agreed with our military actions abroad, I could have easily been a lifer. I did my enlistment and noped the fuck out. Another reason was new recruits that seemed "softer". That expected life to be a vacation once they got to their duty station. It's not. You have more freedom than basic, but you're still in a combat MOS, and you still have to uphold higher standards than everyone else or they'll chew you up and spit you out. And those are the people I absolutely did NOT want to be in an actual combat situation with, because if I have to carry your weight during training cycles, odds are I'd have to in a combat situation which I wouldn't do for someone like that. I'd have their back, but if they didn't have mine because they couldn't hack it and breezed through in basic, I'm going to leave them behind. You hear about that shit all the time. The weak get eaten alive. And there's no place in combat for the weak. There's just not. Doesn't matter if you're male or female.
I know it's kind of all over the place, I'm shit at writing, but I hope it kind of answers your question. Take it for what it's worth, as it's my experience and mine alone. But when it comes to having new recruits entering a battlefield, you don't want iffy individuals out there with you.
Thanks for the explanation. Some of what you said reminded me of Jarhead (2005).
I have a female acquaintance in the Navy. She had a breakdown of some sort. I didn't probe for details, but she's back out there and enjoying herself (according to Facebook photos of her travels). One thing that a female club member told me is that a male holding a door open for her in the military means they don't respect her and she will never be equal. In another Reddit thread, a female explained that "you're either a bitch, bro, or slut." I'm not sure where we're heading with the equality and feminization thing. It has its pros and cons overall. Hopefully, it doesn't become too abused and ruin entire generations like some people already think it has. Meh.
I'm glad I didn't join the military. My concern is how it will affect me, the type of person I will become, and the things I'll have to live with.
Haha, I always do this, too, but in my fantasy I'm in England in the 30s and 40s, drinking at the Bird and Baby with the Inklings or something. Man. What a time to be a live.
The death of the club or pub as a man's domain is really tragic. We went from whiskey and jazz and literary discussions to Bud Light and Nicki Minaj and tits hanging out everywhere. A bad exchange, IMHO.
If you're English, then you won't understand the US mentality of "OMG TITS" and an entire nation falling to its knees because of half a breast with an obscured nipple at a major sporting event. We're really falling on hard times in the brave new world.
Indeed. Today's feminist and beligerent women are undeserving of true alphas. That's why they no longer exist. True Alphas are like the disillusioned super heroes in "The Watchmen". These days it pays better to be the villain.
What's interesting is that my grandmother was always very independent. She is an atheist (my grandfather was a staunch Catholic), started and ran her own business, and marches to the beat of her own drum. My grandfather never tried to control her, but he didn't need to because despite being considered "liberated" for her time, she had very traditional, conservative family and relationship values. She was raised to respect men, respect her husband, and she always did. Having 8 kids, there have been plenty of instances where she has tried giving her adult sons relationship advice, and she can't seem to understand that relationships like hers was no longer exist because of modern feminist ideals.
This. I have grandparents who take pride in being loyal. I still think that women can be brought up to be GOOD women. The default RP mentality, whilst mostly correct for the current generation of western women, seems to ignore this. AWALT etc. I find it overly pessimistic.
When you have a daughter, you'd want to raise her right and not perpetuate the same shitty behaviour brought about by feminism by assuming she's just like that, or will be just like that.
Educate me if I'm wrong. I know (mostly older) women loyal as fuck, so I find it hard to completely buy "AWALT".
AWALT, definitely. Actually, I'm Catholic, so I'd point to Original Sin and say APeopleALT; just different genders and even different cultures and social strata display different immoral proclivities. However, in the past, society, which is to say religion, politics, and culture, broadly, reigned in the worst impulses of men and women.
Were there sluts and cads throughout history? Undoubtedly, and there probably always will. The difference between just about every other era and culture and now, though, is that they were examples of failures to live up to the standard. Nowadays, we just don't have a standard to fail, generally. Our main standard seems to be "don't rape", but of course in true Orwellian fashion, rape can mean anything from brutal sexual assault to "an ugly guy politely expressed romantic interest in me in a well-lit, public place."
I don't think it is pessimistic. I think it's realistic. Humanity is capable of great beauty and good, but also we have being shitty to one another down to a science, too.
Again, I'm religious, so I don't expect secular or atheist folks to find these words as comforting, but I always go back to Mother Teresa's poem on this. It's actually kind of RP, if you think about it:
Now, this doesn't mean be an idiot and bend over and take everything. It just means, "Hey, people will suck. Expect it. Don't let it shatter your world when it happens. Truck on anyway."
At the end of the day, though, people generally get the culture they want and deserve. We sort of point to our grandparents as demigods ("the greatest generation.") But rather than honour them, I find it often gives us a sub-conscious excuse to settle for mediocrity (which, IMHO, is what RPers do when they settle for "spinning plates" and nihilistic pleasure-seeking, but that's just my subjective opinion.)
Cool headed and beating the shit out of people with a baseball bat on multiple occasions are mutually exclusive behaviors.
A few, 3-4 times from the stories I've heard. One was a neighbor that ended up being a convicted pedophile trying to get my 7 year old mother to come "play" in his house and peeping in my grandfathers windows. They weren't just dudes showing up to take my mom out on a date as a teenager. Also, things were different then. There weren't a bunch of people running around "YOU DONT HIT PEOPLE WAH". Sometimes, fisticuffs are exactly what's needed to resolve a situation. Alphas afraid to get their hands dirty are not truly alphas. Anyone who says any different are betas in alphas clothing.
I'm down with fighting when absolutely necessary (and assuming you can get away without assault charges), but a baseball bat makes me cringe. Too much risk of causing an accidental death or severe injury. Don't get me wrong, fuck pedophiles, but still.
You have to understand this was in the late 50's early 60's, not the 00's where someone gets sprayed with water and screams "HE ASSAULTED ME!" We're a softer, gentler world. At least in the US anyways.
Your rambling did nothing to address my point. But it's good to know you're not afraid of a fist fight. I'm sure the Internet will be very impressed
Top quality post. Where as most posts in this forum, even the very good ones, usually serve to extend or rephrase sidebar information, this kind of material pushes the very frontier of RP knowledge. Keep it up, much appreciated!
Definitely some points to take home.
I'm that guy.
If she's not out for me, I don't want anything to do with her. I don't care to fuck a girl that's just a bitch trying to get fucked by an attractive guy. There are far more interesting things than sex. If you deny that, kill yourself now, because you're only good for producing offspring that get left out.
There's nothing wrong with being out for yourself. Your life is yours, but when you're in a ship, the priority is the ship.
I'm not to be controlled and I'm not out to control. I'm not a piece in a game to be moved. I don't play the game. I move when I feel like moving. Loud music is nice. I know what's right and who's left. I won't be objectified just the same as I won't objectify. The heart wants what it wants. Money doesn't pay the bills.
PS. I like being smacked by the right girl.
If you are leading a group this is the perfect image you can have and I indeed know a couple of guys who have this image, although you can see that they clearly do not act in that way if you are able to observe and draw conclusions. There is always a bigger picture, like i.e. their company, involved. These guys are all circling around 40 or are older though.
It's always about finding the perfect balance with being frugal with your time, attention, energy, resources and effort.
You only interfer in any way if you sense that you need to in order to keep the group together or stir it into a direction that you view as benefitial for the group and yourself, and ultimately to secure your position as the leader of the group.
Power means being able to make other people behave in your favour, even if they actually would not behave in that way otherwise. This can be done by either creating that image of the loving patriarch that you painted as a myth, or by applying force and violence mentally and or physically. The problem with the latter is that it can only be executed from a position of superiority and it is only successful short-term and as long as you are able to maintain your position of superiority. The group will replace you with a new leader ASAP if you show weakness in any form and loose said position. The leaders of our so-called democratic society realized this and act accordingly.
However if a member of given group is trying to occupy you and your assets and is trying to create exclusive or priority access to those you will never allow this and act accordingly.
In my opinion all of this has very little to do with the fact that women ultimately are ruthless and illoyal creatures who only follow their hypergamy though.
Couldn't have said it better. I'd maybe just add that you can also always go and get yourself a dog.
Great post! That last sentence is the perfect closer.
The Next guy is always the better Man, that is until they hit the wall and had to find a beta bux.
I posted a comment a while ago and was down voted as fuck.
I basically said that you cannot be a nice guy and an alpha. There is no such thing as a good guy alpha. Either you are focusing on your interests or hers. You CANNOT be a nice guy if you are selfish.
Some people in this community are still delusional about that.
Good post archwinger. Keep up the good work.
I think I have it figured out now.
/u/Archwinger is the mythical manosphere icon, "Pook."
Am I right?
Masculine attracts feminine. It's always been this way and always will be this way. I've noticed the TV shows and movies made before the horrible mistake of feminism happened show how men are supposed to act. Spend some time watching old B&W western TV shows like The Rifleman or Wanted Dead or Alive and observe how different the male/female interactions were.
It's happened every time to me with a girl where it feels like she is feeding off my energy and draining the life out of me. It's all about sucking the masculine energy away from me and her using it to fill a void she feels. Your masculinity makes her feel feminine. It's all about those feels. She won't feel feminine when you're weak. If she has to be the leader she won't feel feminine. You must always be in control of yourself and never show weakness. Women are biologically programmed to follow a man's lead.
They just want to be taken care of as I'm sure you have heard them say; they want someone to call them on their bullsh*t and put them in their place as I'm sure you've heard them say. Think about those two things and think of a little girl in the presence of her father. Is her father going to be a spineless sensitive wimp or is he going to be strong, be the disciplinarian, and lead her? This is what she is looking for in the opposite sex as an adult.
This needs to be drilled into young minds all around. Your wife or LTR is never on your side no matter how much you want them to be. I know this from experience in my beta days. My wife would use every chance to throw me under the bus if it benefited her. Using what I told her to keep in secret, she'd just blurt it out and use the excuse, "well, I didn't think about it that way!"
What a a fucking aweosme post.
And make her write clickbait blogs about how horrible Red Pillers are and backhandedly mention she "appreciates" her husband.
Appreciate. Not love, appreciate. Let that sink in. Marinate in it.
Never fucking forget the lesson; it is damn near suicidal to do so.
Man I just went through this with my wife. She got me to cave and I showed weakness and instead of offering me comfort because I am human I got indignation in return. It made me a bit sad that I can't let my wife see me weak but oh well, nothing I can do to change these creature's I will just keep my weakness sealed away where it belongs.
Build yourself so that weakness is less and less frequent.
It is sad, but do you want a woman who is your friend, or a woman who wants to fuck you? You can't have both. One of the most bitter aspects of the red pill.
Holy shit. Awesome read. Needed this at the moment! I was just about to show my weakness but after reading this, opted against it. Thanks!
So true, gf is the worse person to resolve problems. That weakness she will know will turn against you especially with facebook it can turned in a nightmare when everybody will know on facetrash.
This post pinpoints exactly the conundrum that's been on my mind all week, as I fight the battle that is maintaining frame in an ltr. Ugh
Funny, before finding TRP I posted in a small pickup forum, and the core idea there was four types of people: warm/cold alpha/beta, where warm alpha was the ultimate goal.
Also funny was that the guy who got the best result was a cold alpha, saying this warmness is bullshit. Soon he got quite a following, and people who struggled to get results with the "warm alpha" persona very soon got results from his advice instead. Naturally, the mods hated him. He got banned several times and the forums kinda died every time.
This makes perfect sense to me now. Whenever my ex was feeling low, she used to probe me with questions that reveal some personal weakness/ flaw. In fact even a female coworker did this to me last year. She had a shitty marriage.
Totally agree on this one.
Been lucky in my life,that,at 51 have had all sorts of interactions and relationships with women. To get in the time machine and look back at those moments when i slipped up,the common denominator is when i came out of warrior mode. With the red pill filtration system i peer through,i recall many cringe worthy moments. My x wife per sued me and once my balls were in her purse(explaining where i was, when id be home,who i was with,sharing my ups and downs,….) she lost all respect for me. Same with a long post marriage ltr. Being emotionally available,soft,caving to demands and nagging.Helping with dishes,dusting,chore play. Arrrrrrg! She dried up like the sahara-and would only bang me when i applied some dread game. So,like a mad scientist,i read the periodic table and mix some new chemicals.(this being red pill logic) Fast forward to my new girlfriend: 15 years younger-never text her right back,tell her she's my whore, always mysterious about my whereabouts,tell her "no" a lot,(about stupid ideas,suggestions),let her ask me three times to fix shit at her apartment,hide my ups and downs from her and talk to my smart sister instead. What this does is: makes me stronger and indifferent in her eves. She knows IDGAF. and would,have,launched bad people in my life into outer space. Guys,watch movies made in the 40's and 50's to see how men behaved.They were tough,quiet,outcome independent. You young guys-smack the iron hard and stop being your girls emotional tampon. They talk all day about their feelings. They want you to be tarzan with a life and no nonsense sex drive. Trust me on this one. good luck.
I think many people will take your advice too literally. The problem is weakness, however everybody has weakness. EVERYBODY. There's not an alpha out there that doesn't have weakness.
Women are looking for men who are strongest in time of adversity. Hence the shit test. How do you handle her worst? Yet how do you handle your own worst?
Men simply need to value their own growth over a women's opinion of him. And if she walks away from him since she thought he was too weak for her then that's one less women to worry about.
People who are open to life's biggest challenges and overcoming them end up going the furthest in this game. Sure you get knocked down and shit happens. But it's how you deal with it.
Who cares if some stupid bitch walks away because she saw you taken down by a wave of life. It's your life and your challenges. She means absolutely nothing compared to the big picture.
The men who are open to life's biggest challenges where their weakness is exposed end up becoming stronger men. If she's not there then she simply doesn't matter.
I think it's more of a rule of thumb. A little weakness does not mean she will just stop sleeping with you and screw other guys. But it's potent stuff, a little bit goes a long way, you know what I mean? Be sure to counter it with stuff that still makes you attractive to her. Or should I say, to her hypergamy.
Sorry but bettering yourself is a red pill philosophy, and part of bettering yourself means you become more successful, smart, funny, interesting and show leadership qualities. All of which you list and then claim these are the opposite of what red pill teaches, and even equating it to blue pill??? For someone who is supposed to be red pill endorsed, I was really surprised to read this. The rest of what was written was very much on the mark, especially about women not being someone you can talk to like a friend, and never showing weakness.
You can have flaws, but they have to be pretend flaws that are actually cool as fuck.
Like I fucking haaaate the police, I can't help it! I'm human after all! No real weaknesses, though.
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don't be teaching this to the kids. if it worked for you, good. you're in the 1%, but don't falsely mislead people (especially newcomers who will see this post due to it being stickied) into believing it will be easy. It's much better to show no weakness than to show weakness and deal with the repercussions
its not that its weakness, its they perceive your ability to emote as a man as a sign of weakness and thus thin your insecure.
Ill just leave these here: http://therationalmale.com/2014/11/23/vulnerability/
http://therationalmale.com/2014/09/01/the-myth-of-the-good-guy/
Great words of wisdom OP!
After 20 years of marriage i have really learned this shit the hard way...and too late. I wish someone had told me this when I was a younger man. I will definitely share this wisdom... and TRP with both of my sons.
Tell me if i am way off here but...(.let the ramble begin:)
I am beginning to think, based on my own experience and reading this sub for the past few months, that all Women are unwittingly the enemy of their romantic relationships: by trying to change you, control you, shit test you, get you to share your feelings and be more enotionally open, on some level they are trying to knock you down a peg and in so doing change the way they see you...and destroy the sexual attraction they have for you. Maybe not conciously...but on some level...that is the game they play, right?
I wouldn't tempt my wife with junk food night after night to see if she'd get fat...so i could lose interest in her sexually. But she is totally willing to jeopardize our relationship with games, tests and crazy behavior to see how much i will put up with, and to test my manlines.
If I do all the things she wants, become the man she wants me to be, i get rewarded by losing her respect and becoming a dead bedroom blue pill roommate who pays the bills and helps take care of the kids.
So really...is the whole idea of a male/female "relationship" just one big fantasy/illusion - on the man's side even more than the woman's? You think you're gonna find a woman who you can spend the rest of your life with, someone who is a safe harbor in the storm of life, who you can trust with all your deepest.emotions...but really that's just a bunch of bullshit...'cuz that person does not exist.
Tl:Dr are women the enemy of all relationships? Is the whole notion of a relationship between a man and a woman a fantasy?
She can have a RP relationship with you. You can't have a BP relationship with her.
The ultimate (distal) reason she's doing it is to ensure that you're strong and if shit goes down, you'll keep her and the kids alive.
If you are not, she made a mistake and she has to get out NOW to increase her chances of survival/quality of future offspring (the instinct is still there even after fertility is gone, too). This isn't a conscious process.
There's the view shared by men of older generations that women are just crazy. That's good enough for me.
Personally I'd say no, unless you are referring to that brand of 'relationship' promoted by feminism. Equal and nice blahblah.
In your post I sense some degree of thinking women should think/behave as men do, logically. If you are, you should stop that.
It's the other round if you consider the jerk whose woman gets constantly depressed at how the 'relationship' is bullshit, he doesn't care for my feelings etc.
Yes it's straight up feminist bullshit, by women for women.
Well, since you asked. The male/female dynamic is inherently dysfunctional, but humans have a tendency to delude ourselves of that fact as a result of evolutionary design.
It's the same way that we find tend to find reasons to go on living. If we were to really came to terms with the utter pointlessness of life without the crutch of a faith system, or an irrational belief, or whatever other popular lie people are telling themselves, it might make it too hard to go on.
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We need quality social connections (intimacy) to be psychologically healthy.
You can laugh, talk, tease, and listen to her hamster. But you also tell her she is wrong and over emotional when needed. Tell her that her GF is an ungrateful entitled cunt and tell her why. It's indirectly telling her you won't put up with that crap.
If they are downsizing at work. You don't say "I'm scared about my job." You say "the bitches in HR are favouring women in their appraisals. I'm looking for a new job before they wreck the joint" Women don't want to be blindsided. They want to know you're in control of the situation.
When you in bed after sex and she want's intimacy. She want comfort. You can tell her you're happy with things as they are. If you have concerns tell her you have plans and a strategy to deal With it. You can be open. long as you are in control.
Never apologize for being a man. I was watching TV, scratching my nuts (post shave itch). She: "That's gross, do you have to do that?" Me: "Yes! It's a guy thing! It a simple pleasure women will never get to enjoy. You're Jealous you only have an inch between your pussy and ass." She: grins and walks away.
Was watching the footy and shouting at the screen last Friday. She: "Can't you watch with out shouting?" Me: "I enjoy it more when I do" She: "It's annoying. I'm trying to write" (Facebook) Me: "Well I could always go to the game" She: "Go ahead freeze yourself there" Me: "I just might do that" Tomorrow Sunday I'm taking this Canadian chick to see her first game of Aussie Rules.
A man backs up his statements.
It's about frame and the way you put things. A given thing you tell her can be framed as vulnerability by a BP'er but as strength by a RP'er.
Not that this, or a lot of the other red pill posts are "wrong", but I get the sneaking feeling that this stuff is mostly written by some intelligent but really anti-social beta's pretending to understand how to get tail.
I would say everyone here is at least a former beta. It takes a crisis, or at least some confusion, to seek this kind of stuff out in the first place.
For example, someone with diabetes or who has a close loved one with diabetes knows more about blood sugar or whatever than someone who doesn't.
I like that I can read the body of text, find it sound, then only after looking at the name does clarity of the post makes sense.
Nice one.
It's almost easier to find a good woman. Any suggestions on how to go about this? I'd love a guy friend I look up to, who doesn't consistently disappoint me as much as women do.
Hell if were that easy we probably wouldn't even be here.
This post is amazing, I was thinking about weakness this past months as o showed one of mine. I had to talk about it because if not I'd admit to lie directly. I regret it
Just going to pause for a second. Because I'd like to actually be a human that gets better from his flaws.
"I was wrong. I misjudged HER. I was stupid and horny and just pretending to see what I wanted to see."
Simple as that. Gotta stop hamstering if I want to be better.
Great post without a doubt.
That was poetic and effective.
Decent post, you've clarified something that I've tried to make sense of for a while now.
The "good alpha" as far as I'm concerned is the ideal. It what we should aim for. Generally caring about others and wanting the best for society is large part of what makes a human being great. However from what I understand this means doing what's right in the long run, and not succumbing to short term validation requests which don't tend to benefit us in the long run.
The example you've given about women wanting to access your human side can explain this well. Yes there and then it might make her feel good, happy and what not, but that's short term. If you wanted the best for her (and yourself) you'd realise this and remain strong. This is effectively being a good leader.
If anything your example has given me clarity. Often it can be hard to determine how to behave in certain situations but with the long term mindset this becomes easier.
The way I see it, part blue pill behaviour can be see as short term validation, good alpha as long term and typical alpha behaviour is somewhere in-between. So typical alpha behaviour gives decent results but it has it's limit.
Criticism welcome
Reminds me of a Pink Floyd song.....
I'm glad you posted this. A lot of people here have a huge misconception about what alpha is.. An alpha male is a leader, and strives to see others be the best they can be. And that's it. If you aren't leading others, you aren't alpha. I don't care how big or bad you are. That's sigma.
If women want strong alpha male and not someone who can do the dishes and clean carpets, why do they spread propaganda like that? I don't get it.
It's like i'd want fit beautiful HB10, but i would say to everyone that i want woman that is fat, ugly, but friendly, or something like that.
-And you want to open up a little bit for her and let your guard down a bit, because it feels good to be accepted and validated.
Women love a consistently strong man, but a fkn alpha robot is a creepy turnoff. They also don't want a grown baby dumping out it's feelings over & over.
I see most guys making a bad habit out of opening up too much (over & over) to women.
Err on the side of almost never. You have consistently chosen the wrong person/women if you think never is the only possibility in life.
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They will support you, but it will cause them to be unattracted to you. You can have a friend, or a lover, but not both.
BP'ers and women never counter this they nitpick the dumbest shit but when it comes down to stuff like this they're all quiet. Shows how true this is, if only I had learned all this a lot sooner sigh
As Nathaniel Branden used to say: "No one is coming".
Your post has some Interesting implications. Thx.
If you mention an insecurity to a women, she will adopt the view point of the meanest people that have ever attacked or caused that insecurity. She doesn't want weak seed in her eggs, so don't be weak. Even admitting weakness real or imagined is a sign of psychological weakness. Mother Nature is a cruel mistress.
They all want to marry Jesus. They should do it.
Jesus is a very short Jewish man with massive amounts of body hair and a big nose…. or that's what historians would have you believe. Europeans depict him as a blue eyed light-brown haired nancy boy. Many people don't believe he exists….
I love that last line.
What is the difference between being laid back, and holding frame/being stoic?
"people like seeing weakness in others. It makes them feel better about themselves without having to make any effort to actually be better."
Hit the nail on the head. Great quote
If someone wants something that will prevent me from getting what I want, then that's an enemy to me.
Never forget that your women will try to castrate you and put you in a golden cage where she will try to destroy you (to test you).
So yeah, women are an enemy (in relationships). As Beige Philip said "we are at war with women".
I think what happened is that the women have that "grass-is-greener" effect going on. Things get dull, they blame it on the guy they are with even though they haven't opened up about how they feel. And they walk out with the douche than nuts in 30 seconds and goes right to sleep.
This is why 'good girls' cant take you seriously. Any women who knows herself well enough and isn't just a pie making uterus will have honed her communication skills to hold a mature conversation. You gain education, a work ethic, a healthy sense of respect and awareness and for what? To waste it on someone who wants to attach a collar to you? We need to build together and at times you'll need to trust and pull from your partners experiences and strengths that you don't have .The same applies to a man who isn't a walking ball of bitterness and anger issues. Alpha and Beta aren't people their traits and a combination thereof that as life and circumstances progress must be adjusted, be it for business , family etc. You want this person on your team, to be proud of them, to take them seriously. The same applies to women, sometimes we need to focus on jobs sometimes we need to support our partner when he loses his. There is no "ideal way". Neither party wants to get ripped off but that doesn't equate compromise to failure. Get your pre-nups, keep your accounts separate , that's the easy shit. If they cant stand by their word on paper then you need to evaluate your judgement but for fucks sake please stop demonizing us.
Women I rely on for mature things don't fuck me. Women who fuck me don't get relied upon for anything. Not even fucking. I'd rather not have to compartmentalize. I used to not. Then I decided that I like a successful marriage that includes sex and doesn't end in divorce.
You and I can be bros if that's the life you really want to live. We're not having sex. But I stopped trying to be honest and mature friends with my wife ages ago and the changes to our marriage have been unreal. I don't make the rules. I just find ways to navigate this crazy world using them.
Women don't get passionately aroused for needy weak men who lean on them. Not my rule. I didn't make that up. It's just the way things work.
If you're allegedly one of a handful of exceptions, good for you. But most men fuck and marry the other 99.99 percent of women.
Sounds pretty miserable.
I happen to be one the elusive "good alphas".
I enjoy being fucked daily by secure women with whom I share goals, dreams, and pains.
Maybe stop letting yourself be so consumed by your horniness that you fuck degenerate, insecure bitches?...
Anyone ever think of that? You know you can make decisions in life about who you date...right? Sometimes it seems like the rest of you on here just shack up with the first pathetic pussy to get tingles from your cute little dread game bullshit.
Well, what kind of woman do you EXPECT is going to get tingle from that?
Jesus. There really should be a shift in this sub away from "fuck anything with a vagina" to refusing to settle for these piss poor quality women. Maybe if men collectively refused to fuck all of these vapid whores, women would stop being vapid, hateful, insecure pieces of shit?
Just remember, ya'll are the ones giving these women the power to be the way they are.
AWALT. you're using a pretty common argument of "you're just going after the wrong women"
they are all like that. you are missing the basics
Oh, ok...lt me just ignore all of my real world experience to propagate a fucking abstract theory then...
Oh, wait... never mind. I'm not fucking retarded.
TRP is about sexual strategy, of which there are two kinds: LTR and plate spinning. A woman's goal is to obtain good genes and good provisioning and so we have what we have today. For them to succeed we must back down. Not going to happen, but in the meantime if some guys can get their dick wet, then good for them. That's what they want to do so they do it and discuss strategy accordingly with reminders such as this. What you're doing is more LTR related (my preference, too). This requires a balance of RP and BP behaviours. A different animal. I'm under the belief that with certain women and a proper frame you can talk about almost anything with a woman. All women share behaviours but some (RPW) are more accepting than others. It all comes down to some basic elements. Strong frame, confidence, social skill, that kind of thing. Concern for sub direction is unwelcome, though.
People are free to go "get their dick wet" with whomever, but it should be recognized that your behavior contributes directly to what you are complaining about... therefore it's hypocritical as fuck to complain about it like a little bitch.
I was under the impression that TRP was more than a sexual strategy, it was a life strategy, and that sex was just something that came along as an unintended consequence of improving oneself.
Why not just go to PUA if all you care about is using tactics to fuck shallow bitches? I have no judgement against people that choose to do that... except for when they complain about problems they themselves create through their own behavior. But I was also under the impression that TRP is much more than simple PUA...seems weird to add on all the rhetoric if all you care about is PUA tactics.
I get it. My reason for coming here is half improving my own life and half improving my relationships with women (not sex). Saying TRP is about sexual strategy was a mistake on my part as you are correct, it is multi-faceted.
I saw this post less as a complaint and more as a reminder but I can see where you're coming from. Perhaps you or I can handle being a "good alpha" but some people might not find it so easy. The rhetoric comes from going beyond just pickup and into behavioural studying.
You're right in that keeping these.. Low quality women sexually sated, we perpetuate their behaviour (well, not me but you know what I mean). High quality girls aren't so grossly rare, though, as you would know. And soon I think this style of behaviour will be more looked down upon. At least, I hope.
"Low quality women sexually sated, we perpetuate their behaviour (well, not me but you know what I mean)."
Exactly. Personally, me either. I immediately discount women for having sex with them if they do lots of the random bullshit that is put up with here in order to fuck them. I can only assume that the guys bragging about fucking these low-quality women by putting up with their bullshit are very new to having sex with women, and are just thrilled to be able to fuck any woman finally after a whole life of being a beta. I really don't know what else it could be.
To my mind, any other excuse is hamstering double-think that is non-logical and goes against the stoic and Nietzschean/Existentialist philosophy that seems to form the good core of TRP.
To put it into Sartrean terms, people claiming to follow TRP are basically acting in bad faith by having sex with these shitty women, since these women don't represent what these men want to see in women, but they still play the part of placating them, pretending to be something other than what they are. It's not bad in the sense that "society deems it immoral" or even "it's objectively immoral" it is simply logically paradoxical in that you are actively acting against the morality that you yourself have setup for yourself.
It's really a shame that TRP recognizes there are high and low quality men, but somehow often fails to acknowledge that there are high and low quality women... men will gain real social power again when they realize that their mating behavior can shape women into how they want them to be.
I think he is confusing "good alphas" and equating them to weak men. I see that a lot in society today, there is an automatic assumption of weakness with nice guys, and actually it's no wonder, a lot of nice guys are weak guys.
Your last line is wrong though, women's hypergamy defines who they are.
Ok, follow the ideology, and dismiss your own responsibility for how the world is.
Same shit as the feminists.
It's not dismissing your own responsibility, its understanding what aspects of men that women find attractive, and using that knowledge however you want. Improve yourself, improve an LTR, or just pick up women. I don't think you actually understand what the red pill is, other than having an axe to grind.
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Straw Man Alert
I haven't seen people here on Red Pill making this Blue Pill image of Alpha. This seems a bit of a theatrical prop which you can get people to throw stones at.
The core difference of Red Pill and Blue Pill is the awareness of hierarchy.
Blue Pill - Equality / No natural hierarchy
Red Pill - Embraces natural hierarchy
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As we move away from a Blue Pill mindset we first "reboot" ourselves as MGTOW so that we clear our heads and then slowly begin to see the natural hierarchy with more and more clarity. We study Power which is knowing how to navigate the hierarchy. We know that those above us are seduced by Charm and those below are kept loyal by Love given as a reward.
This is basic Machiavelli stuff.
"From a woman’s perspective, the ideal is to attract a partner who confers both long-term investment benefits and genetic benefits."
This is straight form Rollo's article "Mrs. Hyde." Being friends with your SO is actually a real possibility. Archwinger is writing like he is still in the anger phase. Ideally you can find the perfect balance of alpha and beta in a LTR. Women don't necessarily put you in either alpha or beta. The best LTRs are like that. I'm not saying NAWALT. You should be on your toes. IT'S LIKE NO ONE READ THE ENTIRE ARTICLE AND JUST MISSED THAT LINE.
Oh you can achieve that perfect balance, maybe, and have a decent life. Or you can just decide that it's too much goddamn work for not enough reward.
ITT: Men who look to the internet for a father figure and common damn sense.
Or who weren't lucky enough to have a father figure who was able to impart common sense to them in their formative years. Don't be an asshole.
And looking to the Internet for wisdom or common sense is like looking to the wnba for the slam dunk contest.
It's a strong source of information if one can weed out the bullshit.
"you either die a hero or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain"
this is why women can get hung up on an ex or a ONS
eventually, she will see enough of your faults to elevate someone else over you
The model alpha you described, isn't that what Dale Carnegie describes in how to win friends and influence people?
Sure, they exist. In the top 0.0001% of society. The Warren Buffetts who can afford to be the old patriarch, loving and warm and benevolent leaders of the pack.
I also see these in patriarchical societies in the eastern world where this role is usually taken by the grandfather who is the head of the family until his eldest son takes over the premier alpha role.
Provider and protector.
But maybe he isn't soft to his woman. Idk. My grandpa was a hard hard man, but commanded respect wherever he went. Completely unafraid.
So is MRP about making the best of a bad situation? I thought it was to try to reach this good alpha thing.
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I've been hurt in the past. My mom anally raped me with a vibrator for my entire youth.
Bitching about women on the internet is how I cope. My therapist says I need an outlet.
You should think before you cuss and moan at people. You really hurt my feelings. Don't you care about abuse survivors? You're such an ass.
bombers only get flak when they're on target
Haha, this is fucking stupid -- I'm a good alpha, and the only reason you never hear about us is because we generally don't associate or give a fuck about folks like you.
Women are on my side, and it's great.
This is part of why I love the internet. Whenever I feel bad about the state of the world or of men, I get to hear from people like you that are cooler than I am. It really puts things into perspective and gives me hope.
You deserve every bad feeling you get, as long as you peddle this RedPill bullshit.
Your problems with women aren't their fault, your problems with women are your fault, and pretending like everyone needs to treat women like you do is just a lie you're telling yourself to feel normal.
Maybe hate-based self help isn't a great idea.
Never showing weakness is itself a weakness. Being too afraid to let a woman you care about in to your emotions and thoughts though understandable in the short term broken heart sense is ultimately dishonest coupled with being wimpy and withered. Who the fuck cares if you wore your heart on your sleeve and got shot down? At least you stayed true to yourself. The more true to yourself you are the higher your odds for finding something lasting are. Just be honest, enough of this emotionless shit.
And when a woman hurts you just take it as constructive criticism, really evaluate yourself and them in particular situations instead of having a fucking pity part and blaming it all on the woman. Wade through the shit to find the diamond.
Im sorry but you don't know wtf you're talking about. I broke down and cried during my divorce and I will never forget the look of disgust on her face.
The look of disgust on her face was solely because you were crying?
You're repeating what you've been told. I appreciate that you are sincere, but it is foolish.
You're a twentysomething trying to tell us about how to make a relationship last. You haven't been an adult long enough to have a lasting relationship. You use phrases like "true to yourself" because they have been used to you, but you would be unable to explain in specific and precise terms what you mean... because they have no such meaning.
A closed mouth and open ears are the antidote for innocence.
I'm sorry but I feel as though you are making assumptions about me based on the average reddit user profiling. But I'll tell you there is a vast difference between 21 and single and late 20s with a girlfriend and a 4 year old between the two of us. I'm speaking from a place of current ever changing experience. The delta of life. I'm speaking through having to live with myself and not having anyone around to point out how I can improve and subsequently finding someone I can actually grow with. A person who has helped me make a tangible difference in myself and the way I carry who I am. I was that 22 year old man that hadn't transitioned out of his teenage years because I never felt like I belonged here in the first place. I shrugged of when people said "to be true to myself," I was true to who I thought I was, that's good enough right? Fuck that cliche bullshit.
Through that I became a champion chameleon turning whatever shade a situation called for. I attracted women and once they let their guard down I sucked out their soul just to get what I came for, a fuck. And when I had given enough I found a way to drop them on their heads and slip out the door. The few that I did love I ruined because I didn't let them in at all. But I became comfortable with them and that's never ever good enough. My heart has been broken a few times because my feelings were opposite to my actions but because I'd been hurt in the past I kept it to myself and ended up projecting onto them. When they recoiled I became a maniac, trying my hardest to save it only to realize my mistakes too late.
It took someone with a great propensity for raw honesty to turn me around. I wore my heart on my sleeve and let her in. This relationship has been by far my most brutal to date but no one has ever truly achieved anything by not working for it. Honestly I regret not being myself sooner and trusting more readily, perhaps I wouldn't have had to endure what I endured but then again at least I can see the contrast now and make better choices as a result. The older I become the more I find the typical run of the mill phrases people say actually have weight and truth behind them.
Women are for fucking. Not validating you while you "be true to yourself."
Show your weakness around your guy friends and get some real support. If you never get laid, but can smile big about how "true to yourself" you were, you're misusing women as men.
Biologically speaking, yes women are for fucking and so are men. Both are born with a penchant to spread genetics, ensure the well being of the next generation of genetic host and die to fertilize the ground we lived from.
So what is there to lose or gain from sharing ourself with another. You share those feelings, and if you get rejected then you share them with the next one willing to receive and rinse and repeat. We aren't born to fuck without cause so obviously women search for qualities usable by your children be it physical prowess or mental acuity and vice versa. So why not try forge a real connection with a mate? If they reject you then they aren't for you. No sense forcing it and it's on to the next one. But if they accept you for who you are then why not take it to the next step?
And that's not to be validated in who you are that's to branch out and grow and become a true fucking alpha, with that kind of confidence you can adapt to any situation under any circumstances.
Another thing to consider is the demographic of women you associate with. And in this post you clumped all women into two groups; reddit whores who are only here for vanity and self esteem issues and women who are gossiping tabloid readers you most likely find trying to improve their self esteem in a club or bar or to just plain get fucked. If those are the only women you meet then you will never find a diamond among them and if you do they will most likely be taken. So you make a good point there, THOSE women are for fucking but they aren't ALL like that.
So you propose playing the PUA numbers game, but with emotions? Keep approaching women and being emotional, vulnerable, and sweet until you find one who loves you for you?
That's the blue pill way, dude. You'll find her. She's 28, has a colorful sexual past, and probably asked you how much you make on the second date.
Doesn't necessarily mean you need to be vulnerable and emotional to find the right woman. But being in touch with your feelings also leads to better treatment of those you are in contact with and displaying them correctly will certainly land you someone whose right for you. Also not searching for that girl on reddit and in bars.
Sorry your view of the opposite sex wasn't a more enlightened one and I hope everything works out for you and your search for inner peace.
So I've met this Unicorn you are talking about, post wall, of course, but yeah, such women exists, and the more tingles you create on them, the hornier they become.