How do you actually change a girls behavior sexually?

I like to lead in the bedroom, and just using a basic example, let’s say hold their hands down behind them. Some of these young girls think I like doing this to them, so if they did to me, I’d probably like that too.

I don’t know the proper protocol to let them know I don’t like that, and they should just sit back and let me lead for the most part.

Sometimes I’ll just effortlessly / playfully resist what they’re doing to show them how much stronger I am than them

Or I’ve been verbal post sex and said something like - “yo just cause I do it to you, doesn’t mean I want you to do it to me”

It’s not like they’re doing whatever they’re doing disrespectfully. I think they’re just trying to please, but blue pill feminist (equalist) conditioning has them confused.

What’s the right strategy to get them to fuck you the way you want without making it a big deal?