[34M] "AITA for hooking up with and dating younger girls?"

Two of my friends (both 34F), let's call them Becky and Jessica, said that I am being a huge creep and asshole by going for younger women because I find them better looking. But my response to them was basically this: Why does it matter? Women my own age were also rejecting me before I fixed up, and did so for many years.

This really drives it home, as many men just like him have had to deal with women who would only see him as a back burner option (one that they would settle down with after spending their 20s with all the bad boys) rather than choose him early in order to spend more potential years with him.

This is ultimately what makes men not want marriage, as Dalrock has explained that women are often choosing to give their future husband as few of her youthful years as possible with him. If a woman does not want you in your 20s, why are they surprised if a man says no to their demands for him to devote his best years to them when they had no part in building his status in society? Just like when women say men are not entitled to any woman, women are not entitled to any man.

NTA but definitely a creep. Wtf do you have in common with a 22 year old at 34?

Oh you were born in the year 1985? Wow I was born in that year too! We have so much in common!

This appears to be another shallow accusation, since being closer in age is not going to make you have anything more in common automatically than someone who is farther in age. At 22 she is an adult who can make her own decisions, and shaming the guy alone is rather odd. Do these women shame other women for dating much older men? Or are they only interested in that idea now that it is inconvenient for their epiphany phase as they look for a man in his 30s to settle down with? Where are the women saying that women in their 20s should only date guys their age? All I ask for is consistency, not just attacking men for not acting at your convenience.

I think those that claim to want marriage should be dating with the intention of marriage from the start. That is, not dating anyone you know full well would not be marriageable and also not indulging in hookups. You do not have to know for sure whether someone is "the one" when dating, but when you know they are not, stop wasting time. I would bet young men would be far more interested in the idea of marriage if young women signaled a real desire to get married much earlier. And I don't mean a desire to get married eventually, but when they are both in their 20s.

I know sometimes that it may be hard to find someone right away, but that is exactly the reason to start looking sooner! Often I think the issue that guys in their 30s have with women their age is that they get the impression that those women intentionally waited until the last minute before they started thinking about marriage in favor of "having their fun." There certainly are exceptions to this, but those exceptions are becoming fewer and fewer in number compared to the general trends. Being unlucky is not the same thing as procrastinating, but the procrastinators often want to conflate themselves in the group that was simply unlucky.