Alot of men could avoid heartbreak if they stopped pursuing shallow relationships.

PM_ME_UR_1ITIS_SNAP · 2020-04-10T13:43:24+00:00

Marriage is the deal you do for sex because it's hard to get sex. Male biology puts sex first. As hard as it is in the dating market, most men are going to commit to the first thing that comes their way. If you're BB, that's usually resources.

But finding women who are looking for resources at a certain time in their life, that can't score someone better, is also hard for men. They're already on the shit end of a deal, so they might as well pick the hottest they can get instead of telling their dick to get hard for some ugly girl that also likes golf.

Asking the man to subvert his biology, especially seeing that he wasn't getting sex in the past, is ultimately going to lead to a mediocre life. Where in the current BB situation, it's not ideal, but it's better than waiting for a significantly longer period of time to find someone who is just a shittier version of one of your man friends.

DangZagnut · 2020-04-10T13:23:42+00:00

I’m pretty sure heartbreak isn’t caused by casual relationships. Heartbreak is caused by a guy caring way too much about some girl treating him as a casual then dumping his ass.

Why would you get heartbreak over some bimbo you don’t care about?

Jujuj0 · 2020-04-10T14:18:27+00:00

Men care a lot about your personality. But you shouldn't be projecting a woman's idea of "good personality" with a man's idea of "good personality".

When a man says he wants a woman with "good personality" what he actually means is kind, warm, nice, caring, ethical etc.
When a woman says she wants a man with "good personality", what she actually means is confident, strong, competent, assertive etc ...

Men and women often misunderstand what the opposite sex wants because we are projecting.

I often hear on this subreddit from women that a man doesn't get any points for "just being nice". Being nice doesn't bring anything to the table. Being nice is just a basic requirement. A lot of men are baffled when they hear this, because in our minds a woman gets a lot of o points for just being nice. The more nice she is, the more points she gets.

This is also why men talk about marriage like it's just a sex arrangement. Because women these days are not nice. They are chronic complainers and naggers. That's because they don't find "being nice" valuable when it comes to men, so they are projecting and think that they don't have to be nice either. So the only redeeming thing a guy finds in a marriage is an access to sex.

Silas1067 · 2020-04-10T14:08:39+00:00

Unfortunately, shallow relationships are the things shallow people get, and most people are pretty damn shallow

Men here complain about vapid, shallow, and ignorant women, but there are plenty of low-class, uncultured, and shallow men out there as well. This problem is not gender-specific.

Eventually, a guy is going to want to get married and have a family, despite all the MGTOW tantrums and RP obsessions. You don't want to be the 50 year old creepy uncle with no wife and kids, any more than a woman wants to be a cat-lady. Marriage is not a sex-party, but it is a partnership and project, and it is centered around children.

It is up to men to practice self-improvement, and by that, I don't mean "dude, go lift weights!"

Yeah, exercise is important, but you need to improve your mind, career prospects, attitude, style, etc. And when you reach certain goals, you then become a lot more discerning when it comes to women. The thots are kicked to the curb, and quality becomes the objective: girls from good families, with culture and intelligence, traditional values, femininity, etc.

bad female behavior happens because men allow it, and they do this because they lack self-esteem and self-restraint

resolutions316 · 2020-04-10T15:04:43+00:00

“When women hurt you, it’s YOUR fault for not picking better!”

AWALT. Hobbies don’t change it.

PotOfBeans · 2020-04-10T23:49:25+00:00

Either get a hoe, or get a wife. Stop trying to make the hoe your wife. If your main goal is sex, then what the fuck are you doing getting married?

When you're a young man it's hard for you to pick up women but once a woman shows interest in you and will have sex with you, you assume that she has feelings for you so you marry her, compared to the women who had no sexual interest in you and rejected you, that's why men marry hoes.

So a guy could get laid without making any commitments to the other person.

Definitely written by a woman, you think sex can come casually, it isn't easy that's why prostitutes exist, if it were easy who'd pay for something they could get for free.

It baffles me when I hear guys in the manosphere say "Sex isn't worth the marriage" who told you to get married FOR SEX?!

This is the only way for many men to get sex, it is to commit to one woman, it's also a warning to newer guys to not think with their little heads.

Your relationship should be more than just "I give resources, I get sex".

So men should just get into sexless marriages because that's what it sounds like your saying, why would a women marry a man making each other exclusive to one another then turn around and reject any sex, putting the man in a shit sexless situation he didn't want to be in. I mean maybe you'd have a point if there wasn't an expectation for men to work and provide but we don't see women picking up homeless men because they have great personalities now do we.

I seldom hear guys here talk about these things when it comes to relationships. Just sex and resources.

Well yeah if you get together with a woman you're expected to be the work mule so talking about giving resources and receiving sex is normal if you're expected to provide, no guy wants to work in the corporate rat race just so they can have an asexual partner who's bond is as deep as a best friend. Wanting sex is a perfectly normal thing that shows you're a healthy human being, having sex helps maintain a satisfying and fulfilled life it's simply part of our biology.

"But men dont care about those other things"

Maybe they should care! Perhaps, they'd stop meeting all these shallow stupid bimbos they claim "AWALT". You'd be amaze the types of people you'd meet if you stop vetting for bra size and gag reflex.

You know what you call someone you share interests with but are not in any type of sexual relationship? You call that person a friend, how does ones bond with someone go beyond that of a friend if you're only together because of common interests, is it deeper if you have common interests with a woman of the opposite sex? But if you have an asexual relationship with this person then what makes that different than being friends with someone of the same sex, you have similar interests and there's nothing sexual so it's the same thing.

You can also buy maids! If your dream girl is a Hooker-Maid, you can buy those things without "risking divorce rape".

Because men don't just want sex, they want sex with someone that loves them and not some prostitute.

Wow, the judge reward your ex alimony because she made a fraction of what you and you DIDNT sign a prenup?! IMAGINE. MY. SHOCK.

Alimony should be there to help the woman get on her feet but that's not how it's applied, you don't deserve near half someones wealth just because you took care of your own home that you live in whilst also taking for granted that the man pays for everything. Imagine thinking it's normal that women should get half the mans wealth by default, most men don't even know about this stuff till it's too late, I mean how do you even get a woman to sign a prenup without her throwing a tantrum anyway.

It's not worth it TO YOU because you dont a companion to spend the rest of your life with nor to build a family with. You just want to get your dick wet. And I'm sure you can pay hookers to indulge in your mommy fetish and take care of you.

Imagine thinking that guys get married to women just to get their dicks wet, as you said they could just buy a hooker, the difference is that when men marry they do want a companion and to build a relationship, that's why these men starved of love from the opposite sex will happily marry some hoe that shows them a fraction of attention and love.

Half of marriages end in divorce and the courts are biased against fathers so it definitely isn't worth it. Again men don't simply want sex from a hooker, they want sex from a woman who loves them, they go to hookers because most of the time they can't get love.

"But I actually want love!"

Then dont put looks and sex on a high priority. History has proven that lust clouds a man's judgement and he'll do very stupid things if he let's it control him.

Again the thing that differentiates between being close friends and being life partners is sex, expecting people to ignore that is ridiculous. Imagine some ugly guy calling a female model shallow for not looking past his looks and to look at his personality instead, demanding that she change the way she thinks. If you're getting into any type of serious relationship then sex is very important especially if your a man these days who wants to get married.

Honestly if you just swapped the genders around this would sound like an incel post.

Aaren_Augustine · 2020-04-10T13:38:11+00:00

It baffles me when I hear guys in the manosphere say "Sex isn't worth the marriage" who told you to get married FOR SEX?!

This is the largest hamster misunderstanding of men I will ever see in women. The "Did you think marriage was a nonstop sex party" rationalization. Its for fools who don't in any way understand men or their needs.

The sad fact is most women, when it comes to being aroused by men, are very shallow in this aspect. VERY SHALLOW.

All that other stuff while comforting, won't get you far IF you aren't physically attractive. That doesn't mean a fat guys wife doesn't love her husband, it just means she doesn't want to fuck her husband.

This doesn't just go away when you marry a "nice woman". This doesn't go away if you'd only date a NOT shallow chick. The vast majority of women are like this.

Digedag · 2020-04-10T13:19:39+00:00

What about:

HOBBIES

PERSONALITY

MORALS

WORK ETHIC

That would mean increasing your standards. I doubt that's a viable option for men with non-top smv.

Barely-moral · 2020-04-10T14:07:37+00:00

Another version of this post?

Ok... I will respond to any and all points. I know you will bring those up again so next time I will just post a link to this comment.

Either get a hoe, or get a wife. Stop trying to make the hoe your wife.

Sounds good. It isn't easy. You are thinking only about HVM. Some men don't have as many options. I will come back to this point later.

If your main goal is sex, then what the fuck are you doing getting married? Making long term choices based on short term climaxes is dumb.

Again. Sounds right. It is not easy. You are only thinking about HVM. Some men don't have options. For those men getting married is the only way to get access to a barely stable if stable source of sex.

That's what hookers and fuckbuddies are for.

Plenty of men explained to you that hookers don't satisfy the needs that the majority of the male population is trying to adress through sex. For the last time (and I know this wont be the last time) hookers are not the solution.

About the fuckbuddies, again, you are only thinking about HVM. Most men don't have that option. They are not attractive enough.

It baffles me when I hear guys in the manosphere say "Sex isn't worth the marriage" who told you to get married FOR SEX?!

Two kind of guys say that kind of thing. The kind of guy that can get sex outside of marriage so he doesn't get married, and the kind of gy that can't get sex outside of marriage so he gave marriage a try and found that it isn't worth it.

Who told that second guy to marry for sex? No one. He found himself in a situation where the only way he could get access to sex was through marriage.

BTW, that's called a Sugar Baby. Unless you can afford her, you really shouldn't get one.

I agree. But again, just saying this phrase without thinking is making the same mistake you are making since the beggining of this post. Not all men have access to those opportunities. And most men still have needs that they satisfy through sex. So they will do what they can to get sex.

Your relationship should be more than just "I give resources, I get sex".

You are no one to tell anyone what they relationship should be about. Now that we got that out of the way lets continue.

What about: HOBBIES, PERSONALITY, MORALS, WORK ETHIC.

Two things about this. If the man is in the position to care about those, he has options. If he has options, he is a HVM. Not all men are HVM. Some men have to settle for what they can get. Get it through your head for fucks sake. Options are a luxury. Caring about all those things is a luxury reserved for men with options.

Also, all of those things can be shared with male friends. Why should a man care about those in a relationship with a woman when he already shares those with his male friends? It is ineficient and stupid. If I am going to go through the hassle that is having a relationship with a woman I am focusing on getting the things I can't get through my male friends.

"But men dont care about those other things"

Maybe they should care! Perhaps, they'd stop meeting all these shallow stupid bimbos they claim "AWALT". You'd be amaze the types of people you'd meet if you stop vetting for bra size and gag reflex.

Again. Caring about all those things is a luxury. Stop thinking all men have options. Also, see above. If a man can get something from his male friends he doesn't need to get that from a woman.

"But I also want a woman who cooks and cleans."

You can also buy maids! If your dream girl is a Hooker-Maid, you can buy those things without "risking divorce rape"

I agree. But then we see the same problem that we have with prostitutes. The kind of man that cares about a woman that cooks and cleans in a similar way that he cares about sex is not going to have his needs met by paying a woman for the service.

Wow, the judge reward your ex alimony because she made a fraction of what you and you DIDNT sign a prenup?! IMAGINE. MY. SHOCK. BTW, how many men actually have to pay alimony?

Yes. The man should have seen that coming. That doesn't change that the law is unfair. The woman already got paid her fair price for being a SAHW. She got to live without working for the duration of the marriage. She shouldn't get anything else. Marriage is the only situation where someone is reimbursed the opportunity costs of their decisions. WTF? Why? When you decide to do X instead of Y then you lose the benefits of doing Y. No one should reimburse you for what you are not making doing Y. Doing X was your choice. No one forced you.

"Men shouldn't marry because it's not worth it"

It's not worth it TO YOU because you dont a companion to spend the rest of your life with nor to build a family with. You just want to get your dick wet. And I'm sure you can pay hookers to indulge in your mommy fetish and take care of you.

HOOKERS. ARE. NOT. A. SOLUTION.

"But I actually want love!"

Then dont put looks and sex on a high priority. History has proven that lust clouds a man's judgement and he'll do very stupid things if he let's it control him.

This is actually good advice. Still ignores that most men don't have options though. Most guys don't have priorities. They settle for what they can get as long as a chance for sex is on the table.

The memes I see MGTOW post that help me come to this conclusion:

Great. Lets analyse some memes.

This stuck out to me as projection and speaking from a personal experience.

That woman can do all of that. Whether she wants to do it or not is not the issue. She can.

MGTOW getting pissy because a woman dared to tell her ex that she's a doctor. One comment saying that her head game is more valuable than her career and work ethic. I JUST CANT IMAGINE why these guys only see bimbos?!

I don't think I can say a lot here that I didn't say before in this post. And yes, for a man, her head game is more valuable than her career and work ethic. A man can get his own career and money. What he wants is his dick sucked. Nothing that a woman brings is truly valuable if I can get it on my own.

Claiming love should have exclusive benefits instead of mutual benefits. The "only" excluding benefit for women is that her husband "wipes her ass" and "gives her money".

You are missing the point. That meme is showing how many benefits each gender gets from marriage. And accentuates the point that the only benefits a man get are mutual benefits while women get benefits that men don't get. Read it again. Think about it.

Putting a price tag on women based on height, hair length, and hair color.

WTF? No... the joke is that the men that have partners spend more money and for that reason are more likely to be in debt while the men that don't have partners are in a better financial situation because even if they earn less they don't have to spend money on women and children.

Laughing because normal women dont look like Hollywood women, for some reason.

Yeah this one is stupid. I guess the idea is mocking women that believed that they would get to live a "sex in the city kind of lifestyle" but as I said... it is a stupid meme.

Objectifying both men and women. How sad is it they see relationships as loveless transactions?!

Not sad at all. Love is a feeling. Feelings are irrational. The only way to see te truth for what it is is removing feelings from the equation.

Literally calling dating the same as prostitution.

I don't agree with this meme. Because a relationship is not the same as prostitution. In a relationship there is a promise of exclusivity, in prostitution it is known that there is no exclusivity. But the transaction of resources and sex is basically the same.

Getting pissy because her standards were lower in the past. How dare she mature out of that?! MATURITY IS OVER-RATED! Women shouldn't change whatsoever when they get older!

You are making a Straw-man. Adress the argument. Why should a man work hard to get from a woman what she gave to others without expectations nor demands?

Explaining why its horrible to have a hot girlfriend...because apparently you solely get a girlfriend because she's hot and nothing else.

Adress the arguments. As far as I know almost all of those are true.

Apparently all women have a harem of guys for sex, money, and attention.

All attractive women can easily find themselves on that situation. The more attractive the woman is the more likely men are to bend over backwards for her. You can't be so blind to deny that.

Jake_Chavira · 2020-04-10T17:15:06+00:00

Inversely, a lot of women would have eaiser lives if they didn't put out to shitty men.

It goes both ways. It is not that easy.

901735 · 2020-04-10T13:30:51+00:00

Alot of men could avoid heartbreak if they stopped pursuing shallow relationships.

Yes. The same goes for females. TRP is fixing that.

Either get a hoe, or get a wife. Stop trying to make the hoe your wife.

From that pov, sure. But casual sex is cheaper, especially now as her paying is becoming the norm.

If your main goal is sex, then what the fuck are you doing getting married?

That's a "little bit" simple, don't you think? It's not the MAIN goal, what IS the problem, however, is the weaponization of (withdrawal) of "sexual expression" - he just wants her to TRULY express herself, and not to stop it. "Silence" is not as fun as "discussing" things is, no? Why would she feel so insecure to close herself off, you know? "You never discuss things sexually with me, babe." It's communication, bodily emotional communication. =]

I think in many cases this fear females have is unjustified. And her inability to talk about it openly with him is underperformace on her part - might be a big deal, I understand, but if she is incapable of addressing it [which can be a problem, as there are not rare cases of him having to "pull things out of her", of her being a shitty communicator] she might want to seek instructions on how to "woman up".

pooppeebuttmcnuggets · 2020-04-10T18:49:51+00:00

There certainly is a demographic of men who pursue slutty, shallow woman who are only after sex but they are a reasonably small minority. The majority of men just want a woman who is attractive to then and has common interests that's it. I hope your not telling men to go for woman they dont find attractive that will be a dead bedroom situation in a few weeks, and just for the record just because a womans slim or skinny dosent mean shes by default hot or even attractive. I dont find the woman in your picture attractive but due to black obesity being at 85% I can see her being a hot commodity.

toasterchild · 2020-04-10T20:03:58+00:00

Im not sure about hobbies, I've seen plenty of shallow relationships built around a single hobby.

mindsanitizer · 2020-04-10T22:37:28+00:00

I'm really digging how Lillth is becoming a full time advocate for the hookers-and-maids lifestyle.

MistaStealYoSock · 2020-04-11T02:17:46+00:00

I am SO sorry you are exposed to that toxicity! Some guys are interested only in sex and get angry when they don’t get it, I suppose! I assure you, we aren’t all like that, and a lot of us really do care. I read a comment just the other day that really resonated with me, you know. It said, “Some men are raised by their parents, and some are raised my their porn site.”

PierceTheEye · 2020-04-10T15:30:53+00:00

A lot of men could avoid heartbreak if they stopped pursuing women.

"Now for the matters you wrote about: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman."
-1 Corinthians 7:1.

So go monk. Ask any women here on PPD and they'd be happy if you stopped.

Neverbiden · 2020-04-10T13:44:20+00:00

This was a weird one to make gendered

Mrs_Drgree · 2020-04-10T14:09:46+00:00

[removed]

Mrs_Drgree · 2020-04-10T16:20:26+00:00

[removed]

MuleFool42 · 2020-04-10T14:46:21+00:00

These rants are inaccurate and show a strong antipathy toward men in the manosphere. Why do you care so much?

The manosphere wouldn't exist if it weren't for men having real life experiences that they decided they would not tolerate any more. It's new, it's crude, but it's real and their lived experiences are real. And each individual is in a different phase of growth and understanding.

You are not a man and don't know what it's like, and that's fine. But you're not the person to tell men what they should be like, or how to think or behave. Feminists have been doing that for 60 years and men are done listening to them and instead, listening to other men. You might think your advice is helpful but it's not, men in the manosphere are done listening to anyone but other men going through the same things.

If you don't like what they say, too bad, it's not about you anyway. I'm not sure why you care so much, what harm does it do if men compare notes about their lives and give each other advice based on their lived experiences? Women do that all the time, get over it.

hammerhaunts · 2020-04-10T13:20:14+00:00

HOBBIES PERSONALITY MORALS WORK ETHIC

have fun trying to find those

901735 · 2020-04-10T13:40:49+00:00

It's not worth it TO YOU because you dont a companion to spend the rest of your life with nor to build a family with. You just want to get your dick wet.

If that's your fear, maybe you should address it. Him "just getting his dick wet" is what females are insecure about.

Smoogs2 · 2020-04-10T13:43:17+00:00

That doesn't make sense. Why would I get heartbreak over banging a prostitute (the shallowest of relationships)? Similarly, I would be less heartbroken if I only wanting a girl for sex (ONS and FWB).

asdf333aza · 2020-04-10T18:06:05+00:00

It baffles me when I hear guys in the manosphere say "Sex isn't worth the marriage" who told you to get married FOR SEX?! BTW, that's called a Sugar Baby. Unless you can afford her, you really shouldn't get one. Your relationship should be more than just "I give resources, I get sex".

Society. Men used to have to get married to get sex cause women weren't putting out like they are now. They weren't as slutty. That's how your grandparents and maybe even your parent did it. That's culture and tradition. And feminism is a voice that tells girls they don't have to follow those traditions or cultures. Boys however, don't have any mainstream voices on popular media telling them they don't have to follow their traditional rolls. Girls are told to pursue their dreams and are constantly being uplifted. While boys are constantly being told to do less to give someone else a chance and to sacrifice for others. Boys are stil being instilled with some fantasy of saving a female in distress (aka a hoe, a slut, a broke bitch, or whatever) and being her Knight in shining armor and eventually getting sex and married. Boys are still being taught that kind of shit, while girls are constantly being told to be their own heroes. Boys are being socialized to want to save girls and girls are being socialized to want to save themselves. Boys aren't being told to live their lives for themselves. Girls have a public voice telling them to fuck tradition and their societal expectations, while guys don't. Feminism is being taught in public education and basically given to girls, while any knowledge from the manosphere has to be sought after. The mainstream media's msg to girls it to be free and do what you want, but the msg to guys is submissions, service and responsibility. Some guys catch on to game, but a lot of boys are still being taught that they have to bend to societal expectations, like paying for dates, helping girls, protecting girls and settling down.

What about:

HOBBIES PERSONALITY MORALS WORK ETHIC

I seldom hear guys here talk about these things when it comes to relationships. Just sex and resources.

Every time u feminist bring the imaginary wage gap, you will hear men bring up personality, morals and work ethic. In terms of relationships, a lot of you girls don't have personalities or hobbies or talents. The modern 20 something year old female's best talent is taking selfies, ass pictures, and reposting memes. Personality my ass. How many female tinder profiles have a similar phrase to "I like hiking" or "follow my ig". We have a whole cookie cutter term for that fits most females nowadays and it's called "a basic bitch".

"But men dont care about those other things"

Maybe they should care! Perhaps, they'd stop meeting all these shallow stupid bimbos they claim "AWALT". You'd be amaze the types of people you'd meet if you stop vetting for bra size and gag reflex.

As soon as ya'll stop vetting about height, dick size and a man's finances. You females are guilty of the same shallowness that ya'll complain about.

"But I also want a woman who cooks and cleans."

You can also buy maids! If your dream girl is a Hooker-Maid, you can buy those things without "risking divorce rape". Wow, the judge reward your ex alimony because she made a fraction of what you and you DIDNT sign a prenup?! IMAGINE. MY. SHOCK. BTW, how many men actually have to pay alimony?

So because women don't want to do their traditional roles, men have to pay for maids? How about men stop doing their traditional roles and stop protecting women. You know how Brock Turner got caught? Two men came to a females aid and helped her. If men shrugged of their traditional roles then those guys would og turned the other way and that women would of been told that she should just get a bodyguard.

As for the marriage, that's hypergamy, females marrying guys with more resources than themselves to secure their future. Thats a disgusting truth about women that men aren't usually taught about. Women are usually looking for guys who have more than them. And these poor gullible men think the women actually like them, when the women just likes what they can provide. Men and boys aren't taught about that side of female nature. And 80% of all divorce proceedings involve a request for alimony. . And of all alimony payments. Only 3% go to men. The other 97% of the time is men paying alimoney to females. And you girls don't want equality, that's why all the females were butt hurt about Adele losing a lot of money to her low level husband. Newsflash, what happened to adele is what has been happening to men for decades. That's the kind of crap that redpilled a lot of men. AND THEN THERES CHILD SUPPORT, which is whole other can of worms. If females weren't all hookers and gold diggers trying to disguise themselves as ladies seeking a serious relationship when they're really looking for a support, or paycheck, it wouldn't be a problem. But once again mainstream media and society isn't telling boys that girls chasing them for their money and resources. A lot of these guys THINK women love them for them, and they THINK their wives will stay with them even if they didn't have money. And that isn't the case and 70% of divorces are started by women and one of the top leading reasons for divorce is finances. . Society doesn't even attempt to educate men on the nature and bad parts of women. Boys are being lied to and told to believe all women, support all women, help all women and that women most women are good and deserve respect and love. When in reality, ya'll are just as fucked up as the other half of the species, but society hides that aspect from men. Men have to actually scavenge for that information. They have to learn from bad experiences. Media only talks about the horrors of what a man does to a women, but never about the horrors of what women brings to men. PANDORAS BOX. The men simply didn't know any better and weren't taught about women. Feminism and the mainstream only address the bad parts of men and calles themselves the face of equality, but they never bring up the bad parts of women. cough Amber Heard.

"Men shouldn't marry because it's not worth it"

It's not worth it TO YOU because you dont a companion to spend the rest of your life with nor to build a family with. You just want to get your dick wet. And I'm sure you can pay hookers to indulge in your mommy fetish and take care of you.

Thats like paying $20 for instant cup Ramen. You'd be better off getting $1 Ramen or $20 steak. Only idiots are paying steak-price for ramen-quality.

It's not worth it all. You can have a perfectly fine relationship, without the government being involved. Why are u females so desperate for commitment? Always trying to lock down and secure resources. You want to get your government daddy involved in the relationship cause you know the government will protect u if shit hits the fan, and again guys aren't taught about the horrible things that women do, so they just go right along with it thinking that their female truly loves them and that she would never betray him when in fact it's only a matter of time. Women are the ones pushing for marriage and the ones pushing for divorce. And guys are usually just along for the ride cause they don't know better, cause society never educated them how a women might try to ruin their life. He has no idea until one actually does.

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InertBrian · 2020-04-10T14:36:14+00:00

This post is operating under the assumption that every man truly wants a relationship that isn’t shallow..that’s why there’s the meme of the guy gets rich and dumps his wife for a hot-young 20 something year old.

The issue for the MGTOW men; it is because they’re basically at the bottom of the food chain (harsh, but it’s true on average), they have little to no sexual choice in terms of who they can select to wife up. More attractive men have more ability to be patient and vet for good personalities because they have more people interested in them.

A good analogy is Google gets more applicants than a small tech startup. Google has more leeway in terms of putting their candidates through a rigorous process to vet for the smartest people with the best work ethic. The small tech startup isn’t getting as many candidates and is going to have a good candidate, but not a top-tier one. And will have way less opportunities to find a worker with a good work ethic (personality) that is very intelligent (very attractive).

Edit: women have this same issue. It’s not really gender-specific. That’s why men complain about single mothers in here, because there was likely flags suggesting that the husband would leave at any time or the woman in question didn’t spend enough time vetting the guy. And in that case the child gets effed over not having a father figure

ElGupo1978 · 2020-04-10T22:35:06+00:00

Be honest for a second. How many couples are these douchebag type Chad and Stacy super hot sexy people , those people have the most drama bs and are the last people anyone would want to model their relationship on the reality tv style of hot blooded passionate sexy torrid none sense ? Men in mass aren’t trying to emulate these weird toxic slick Hollywood type intrigues and dangerous liaisons. But to be able to mate at all you have to put on this act that you would be able to pull off one of these penthouse forum type escapes. Becky Bibliophile is as far out of reach as the über thot Instagram succubi.

SteveSan82 · 2020-04-10T23:27:23+00:00

Even if you pursue a relationship to start a family, that will still happen. Ugly or not. Religious or atheist. The goal is always the same with women.

If you apply TRP you can avoid all that nonsense.

Zippo-Cat · 2020-04-11T05:12:19+00:00

All real romantic relationships are based on sexual attraction.

Anything else is just playing house.

dalia-chan · 2020-04-11T18:43:32+00:00

Redpillers and especially mgtows don’t want a relationship or an emotional connection. They want to be an alpha fucks, which mean fucking as much women as they can, you constantly see them throwing sentences like ( never ever get married) it’s not they they fear to be divorce raped, it’s just that they don’t know why would they spend time with a woman if it’s not to rip her pussy appart. But the thing is that most of them aren’t that good looking to get casual sex easily or rich enough to afford a sugar baby so they go on and use some weird tactics to get women to give them sex for free. It’s so obvious 🙄. They constantly tell how love is a blue pill fantasy lmfao. Why would someone wanna get married if he doesn’t believe in love and companionship? They’re just mad that the hot hoes don’t allow them to fuck them easily the same way they do with chads.

wtknight · 2020-04-10T14:29:08+00:00

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OddButton6 · 2020-04-10T13:41:13+00:00

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aspiringdruglord · 2020-04-10T14:17:00+00:00

On OLD at least, coming across a guy who actually states minimum standards for compatible values or at least a filter to ensure someone isn't completely vapid, is like finding a unicorn. Never found myself passing over these people because they're not tall enough, rich enough, formally educated enough. The most common reason is because their profile is practically empty and I have no idea who this person is other than a human male who has girlfriend vacancy for any human female who isn't a serial killer or fat. The most you'll see about values is the occasional guy virtue signalling about what a big feminist he is. Also pass.

It's all bland nothingburger profiles just trying to cast the widest net, or the occasional crazy rant about mostly superficial shit from some guy with no self-awareness of how they're insanely beyond anything he can offer himself. People seem to simultaneously whine that they can't get the kind of person they want, while afraid to actually outline what's important to them. I used to get semi frequent messages complaining about my own profile for being like this, as if I'm shooting myself in the foot by putting off... people I'd never be interested in anyway. Or sentiments about how picky you can "afford" to be, like you're losing anything of value if it's not what you want, at least in terms of serious long-term relationships. I've heard the same from the handful of guys who do display (reasonable) standards. It invites hate mail.

nickname_this · 2020-04-10T16:15:48+00:00

All of your main points are true, but your efforts are wasted because the stuff you quoted are the viewpoints from guys who have very limited relationship and sexual experience(I'm assuming they do at least have some).

It's all about perspective.

You talk about how these guys should just buy a hooker who cooks and cleans if that's all they want from their wife, but that's just relative to the position they're currently in. If they have a wife then they can get sex regularly and have constant companionship. That's a big step for men who struggle to even get sex occasionally.

Once you're able to at least have a healthy dating life, purely sexual relationships become boring and you start looking for more than that. But that only becomes possible if you're able to get into those purely sexual relationships to begin with.

You have to take it one step at a time. Don't tell a man not to make looks a priority for him, when that man has a hard time getting even average-looking women.

TheBookOfSeil · 2020-04-10T16:48:15+00:00

Show some studies where shallow relationships and heartbreak are correlated where non-shallow relationships and heartbreak are not.

These things aren’t mutually exclusive. You can be in a non-shallow relationship and just as easily get your heart broken. People aren’t obligated to stay with others, and most people would rather be with people that want to be with them and not those who are desperate to be with someone because they’re lonely and nobody has shown them any interest. Anyone is capable of being a shitty person.

This post is just a plea from the unattractive side saying “We’re not like Becky! We won’t hurt you, so come hit on us plz! We will give you sum fucc! Becky is a hoe!”

Most guys with rather be in a frustrating relationship with an attractive woman than be in a frustrating relationship, or even a sometimes pleasant, sometimes unpleasant relationship, with an unattractive woman.

asdf333aza · 2020-04-10T18:09:12+00:00

We will now commence with the weekly dragging of the OP. In C minor. Begin!

This long post is about men is based on internet memes. Not a single news article, database, or peer reviewed source. It's basically shit. A legitimate shit post of nothing but opinions and no actual facts. Fake news, if you will. You are attempting to use memes to back your point of view. Funniest part about it is that OP doesn't even know how silly it looks.

"I think the manosphere is this and that because an internet meme. " - OP 2020

piguy31415 · 2020-04-10T18:11:56+00:00

It's pretty funny for women to explain away the rise in male sexlessness with "men aren't getting married anymore" and then also say "don't get married if you want to have sex."

Also this post massively reeks of apex fallacy. The entire thing seems to be a screed for misbehaving attractive men and basically completely ignores the lived experience of average and below average men (surprise surprise women forget we exist)

reluctantly_red · 2020-04-10T14:23:57+00:00

If your main goal is sex, then what the fuck are you doing getting married?

Why else would you have a woman move in? If you're not getting fucked at least 10 times per week what's the point?

Grub09 · 2020-04-10T17:00:36+00:00

I’m fine with men pursing whatever they want. No harm, no foul

I’m not fine with them pretending they have no agency, or blaming us for their decisions

abaxeron · 2020-04-10T19:29:30+00:00

Stop trying to make the hoe your wife.

"All women who betrayed their men were hoes"; more at 11. No, I like your logic, it throws out the entirety of whining and excuses about how they all "had good reasons".

coconutismyreligion · 2020-04-10T16:54:08+00:00

Men dont care about hobbies, ext ect, because... surprise surprise, they dont care lol.

Men care about sex. Alot. Let them suffer. Who the fucks cares. I surely dont.

And just as easily they have no shame asking me for sex EVERY opportunity they get, I have no sympathy throwing my bills in their face. Just like men, eventually a woman will say yes to their low quality advances and they will get lucky. But you wont get any yes's if you dont ask ! I dont have a shred of sympathy, I'll take your whole pay cheque. In my hand. Now. Thank you:) DIck carousel's dont deserve the attention of virtuous women.

The high quality men will figure it out, they dont need posts like these. They're good 👌👌👌

churnthrowaway123456 · 2020-04-10T14:05:37+00:00

Most women don't want a relationship. And a man who wants commitment is a huge, huge turnoff

2020-04-10T14:39:27+00:00

No one can 'avoid heartbreak' Life and our relationships with people are not predictable.

Christian_Kong · 2020-04-10T14:53:22+00:00

Most guys don't really have that many options. Gotta take what you can get or it could be months to a year(+) until you find something else. Most men don't have the option to choose a shallow relationship over another more compatible one.

akihonj · 2020-04-10T14:59:45+00:00

I have to be honest I agree with your post. It's reasonable that people should put what they want first, if you just want cheap thrills and sex then either pay for it or hook up don't wife up a hook up

If you want something long term then that too is ok but in that case look for things that matter. This I think has always been the case. I think it might have got lost along the way somewhere but I think overall bits always been that way.

Where I have an issue is that the cases, and there are more than enough of them, where people have done exactly that and still gone through the mill. That's partly because of group biases and government support systems so then regardless of who a man chooses to marry he's always running the risk that he's going to get screwed over by that woman simply because no matter how good he is as a man she will always be told she can do so much better.

Even in cases where numbers within the group for that woman want that men for themselves, telling her she can do better is almost one of the easiest ways to drive a wedge into that relationship, something I've seen happen more than a few times. That's a problem that neither trading up nor down is going to solve.

TheEuropeanVirgin · 2020-04-10T15:06:54+00:00

What if every kind of woman has already rejected you but every kind of woman you see also chases top-tier men? No matter her looks, most women have had multiple guys crushing on them during their lives, on the other hand only "chads" can boast this. It's clear that men are already attracted to several kinds of woman but the same doesn't apply to women. Then of course there's the simp who worked his ass just to end end up beta buxxing.

This is dating in 2020, this is how the dating market ends up without any cultural or social regulation. I don't think this is inherenlty wrong - it's just nature. It's definitely bad for some but it's good for some others.

wtknight · 2020-04-10T15:42:53+00:00

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wtknight · 2020-04-10T17:10:32+00:00

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xslcx · 2020-04-10T22:32:52+00:00

I have to pay alimony.

LillthOfBabylon · 2020-04-10T22:34:23+00:00

[deleted]

Mescalean · 2020-04-10T23:13:32+00:00

So what of the whole “whore in sheeps clothing” scenario???

This scenario kind of relies on the the thought women never/will never lie to manipulate a partner/interest.

People don’t lie about intentions? Women are wonderful fallacy? Come on now Lil.

MerryVegetableGarden · 2020-04-10T23:47:58+00:00

Marriage should only be done if you’re interested in children, with the mentality that it should last till the grave or, at the very least, when the youngest moves out. A long-term relationship without plans for children and marriage should proceed with the expectation that this isn’t a permanent thing. We’re together as long as we both desire to be. People are more likely to cheat in long-term relationships when compared to marriage, but the financial fallout from separation is far less pronounced.

TokusatauGunMan · 2020-04-11T00:38:12+00:00

I do try to get a wife, but women are shit. How am I supposed to find the golden snatch Harry Potter?

The ugly ones? You can be a whore and be ugly.

The ones with bad hygiene? Again, I've seen it. In fact those tend to be the skankiest. Imagine my shock.

Oh I know, let me go looking for the rare Pepe meme woman who likes quantum physics. I'll just go to the quantum physics store... lol

Probably one of my hobbies I'm not proud of I could meet some girl at a gaming shop with but the kinda girls that like those things are the whores mentioned above, and they know they have a lot of low hanging fruit of thirsty Idubbz looking motherfuckers to choose from

This ain't purple pilled. This ain't even gotten the doctor's prescription yet

MonkeyOnMyBack1111 · 2020-04-11T02:02:34+00:00

Genius.

jayval90 · 2020-04-11T02:12:58+00:00

I don't go after shallow girls, and I still ended up lots of heartbreak. The antifeminist stuff has really helped me see past the bullsh*t and actually have a modicum of real respect (both self and for them) and realistic expectations around women.

twennysvn · 2020-04-11T05:06:16+00:00

Alot of women could avoid heartbreak by not chasing 1%ers.

But they wont.

anonymoushero1 · 2020-04-11T06:05:38+00:00

I have had long term relationships with women because I loved their personality. Their hobbies. Their interests. Their sense of humor.

But they weren't as attractive.

So I've taken your advice. You know what happened? They were begging me for sex and affection. And it was a chore fucking them because desperation is not attractive.

You can't have it both ways.

SelenityMoon · 2020-04-11T10:05:51+00:00

Conversely, if sex and hobbies are both important to you, how about you find a wifey material with a high sex drive? You seem to imply that being wife material and being high libido are mutual exclusive, when they definitely aren’t. In my opinion, men in general should have higher standards for the women that they date. Don’t accept a dead bedroom, but don’t marry someone you have nothing in common with. I don’t why that’s so unreasonable to you.

the_calibre_cat · 2020-04-11T14:49:37+00:00

I think if we've learned one thing over the past few months, it's that "shallowness" is vapid, empty, bad label on a reasonable relationship requirement aka "standard".

On_here_for_study · 2020-04-12T05:15:44+00:00

This entire thread is bullshit. This entire sub is bullshit. This is nothing more than blue pill clown shit.

Plutonic_blue · 2020-04-12T10:30:44+00:00

Ah yes, the good ol "Everything is mens fault". Dude men are humans (Shocking I know) and a lot of men don't get heartbroken from shallow relationships. A lot of times the women really woo'd them over then did a complete 180 and stabbed them in the back (Yes I know it happens to women too). In short, sometimes men get played bad, it happens, and it's not always their fault.

One of my ex's broke up with me the worst way possible. And our relationship had a lot of substance. We'd spend a lot of time talking, spending time together, worked with each other, hell even moved in together. She started changing then did a complete 180 and she didn't give a fuck about me anymore. But yeah Im a man so it was my fault right?

Now imagine if I told women that got heartbroken it was their fault? Yeah, wouldn't be so cool then would it?

Simp_Gulag · 2020-04-13T09:02:30+00:00

They can treat certain men like crap. Most men have to deal with crap from regular women instead.

Xombie0991 · 2020-04-14T17:27:12+00:00

Same could be said about women

12112019 · 2020-04-10T16:01:17+00:00

Once again I agree, you make excellent points on why most men shouldn't marry, the fact that they do just proves how beaten and irrational these men are.

retal1ator · 2020-04-10T16:04:58+00:00

Yes, I agree with what is said here. Keep in mind however that men don't really only marry for sex, but also for cuddles, attention, love, and for having someone to protect and nurture. No one aknoledge that for societal pressure and expectations.

We are hard wired to take care of someone, and I think that's even more tempting for us, at least it is for me.

Sex after a certain age becomes less interesting, but the need for a companion remain.

Bottom line, I wish men would select women for more than just looks. I prioritize kindness, temperament, loyalty, and compatibility over look and it worked decently for me.

Men definitely need to distance themselves from appaearance and push women to become better comanions. The world needs more than just cum dumpsters.

mrcs84usn · 2020-04-10T16:19:51+00:00

Either get a hoe, or get a wife.

There are a lot of hoes that are good at hiding their hoe-tivity long enough to lock down a man.

It baffles me when I hear guys in the manosphere say "Sex isn't worth the marriage" who told you to get married FOR SEX?!

Most of them AREN'T getting married, so what's your point? Also, TRP and PPD has talked ad nauseum about why paying for sex isn't nearly as fulfilling as having a woman actually desire you.

(Hobbies, Personality, Morals, Work Ethic) I seldom hear guys here talk about these things when it comes to relationships. Just sex and resources.

You clearly haven't been paying attention if you honestly believe that.

You can also buy maids! If your dream girl is a Hooker-Maid, you can buy those things without "risking divorce rape".

Pretty sure TRP promotes self-sufficiency, and getting a maid is a needless expense. It doesn't take very long to deep clean your house once and then maintain it from then on. And every man should have at least a short list of recipes that he's able to handle, especially if he's meal prepping.

It's not worth it TO YOU because you dont a companion to spend the rest of your life with nor to build a family with.

There's a difference between wanting a life long companion and wanting the government involved in your love life.

TomahawkSuppository · 2020-04-10T17:04:55+00:00

Yea, because women always tell you the truth about their past. How dare you men not have the ability to know the woman’s past without needing to ask?

Million-Suns · 2020-04-10T17:05:17+00:00

It's not worth it TO YOU because you dont a companion to spend the rest of your life with nor to build a family with

Honestly, regardless of how awesome the partner is, marriage and kids is never worth it.

People do it because LifescriptTM, tradition, religion etc. aka all the wrong reasons.

You can perfectly be content with a LTR without having to sign a paper or an expensive wedding ceremony. In my environment, I have seen marriages crumble and LTR staying solid, because the latter allows for a more straightforward relationship as it is deprived of the entitlement you demand from a business partner.

Innovative_being · 2020-04-10T20:16:09+00:00

So basically you’re saying men shouldn’t take sluts seriously and only LTR wholesome women? I already knew that

peachycreaam · 2020-04-10T21:00:37+00:00

men’s love is conditional based a on a woman’s looks, a sad biological truth.

Mrs_Drgree · 2020-04-10T21:22:11+00:00

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CHAD_TDK · 2020-04-10T15:37:03+00:00

the first line of your commentary

Either get a hoe, or get a wife.

contradicts your statement

Alot of men could avoid heartbreak if they stopped pursuing shallow relationships.

Assuming that by get a hoe you mean:

One Night Stands
Friends With Benefits
Fuck Buddies
Hookups
Sugar Dating
Mercenary Sex
Sex Work
and similar

Those - to me - are "shallow" relationships, and if a guy were to pursue these shallow relationships in lieu of a committed monogamous relationship they (these men) would avoid heartbreaks.

ILikeToArgueALot · 2020-04-10T15:54:26+00:00

Didnt you already post this last week

LotBuilder · 2020-04-10T16:41:26+00:00

All of these idealistic threads ignore human behavior and natural polarity. In every relationship there’s a giver and a taker. They seek each other out and either consciously or subconsciously enjoy their role. The more you do for a taker, the more they take. The more you do for a giver, the more they try to give back to you.

RedPill_Dragon · 2020-04-10T16:42:23+00:00

Alot of men could avoid heartbreak if they stopped pursuing ~~shallow~~ relationships.

FIFY

PickleLine · 2020-04-10T17:35:05+00:00

This rarely happens. If a man seriously considers a slutty woman for a relationship, then the slut is less likely to sleep with him much less get in a relationship with him.

On the other hand, if a woman seriously considers a man for a relationship, then the man will at least string her along for sex and pretend to be interested in a relationship with her.

LitPepe · 2020-04-10T21:56:54+00:00

i'm just in for the sex. I know it, she knows it.

Title	Alot of men could avoid heartbreak if they stopped pursuing shallow relationships.
Author	LillthOfBabylon
Upvotes	295
Comments	484
Date	April 10, 2020 1:10 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/fyfl7x/alot_of_men_could_avoid_heartbreak_if_they/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/alot-of-men-could-avoid-heartbreak-if-they-stopped.361592 https://theredarchive.com/post/361592