alpha.. beta.. sigma.. omega. what a load of crap.

 

here it is in simple form.

 

There is feminine and masculine.

A masculine man will attract a feminine woman.

A masculine woman will repel a masculine man like two north poles of a set of magnets.

 

At their core, about 80% of women are feminine and about 80% of men are masculine. Bad messaging and cultural programming has a lot of folks trying to be something they are not - and generally making a lot of them quite unhappy in their relationships.

 

If you are a masculine man, and you have paired with a feminine woman, she will want to trust you. Once you earn that trust, she will want to yield to you as long as she feels your strengths. She will nurture you and rebuild your energy.

 

If you are a masculine man, and have paired with a masculine woman, she will endlessly shit test you, compete with you, drone on about other men she dealt with that day, and will drain you of your energy.

 

If you are a feminine man, this post is not for you.

 

edit- to add this comment from below:

Also, a feminine man will repel a feminine woman but he will be attracted to a feminine woman. Men are attracted to feminine women, women are attracted to masculine men.

But in the end, the masculine women will always end up with the feminine man. Even if a feminine woman does end up with a feminine man, she will become more masculine (controlling, dominant, aggressive) to make up for his lack of masculinity.

 

What are these traits?

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These are masculine traits:

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Freedom - a yearning to not be tied down, freedom as in celebrating when a running back breaks through a defensive line to run free, freedom as in not being a slave. not a slave to your emotions, your possessions, the day to day successes and failures, and especially not a slave to your woman.

 

Direction - a mission. Something that you can give the world. Something that drives you. What gift do you have to give the world?

 

Logic - you are not slave to your emotions, and can analyze the situations life places in front of you.

 

Focus - you can disassociate yourself from distractions when necessary to pursue your mission.

 

Integrity - your word is your balls. You do not break either of them for anyone if at all possible.

 

Stability - you are secure in yourself. financially, career, emotionally. You do not have a new job or a new "love" every 3 months. When a woman get's emotional, you are the 100 year old oak tree that has seen a million storms and know that this one too will soon pass.

 

Passion - this means to be present. pay the fuck attention and be present. passion about your job, your hobbies, and your women. Fuck them all with the intensity of a thousand suns.

 

Independence - "I love a man on welfare" .. said no [feminine] woman ever.
Alternately, "I love a man who texts me 15 times a day" said no [feminine] woman ever.

 

Discipline - this means doing the right things even when you do not want to. It means leg day no matter if your calf is cramping. It means fuck motivation (which comes and goes), it means you do something because it is what you need to be doing.

 

Confidence - self esteem is knowing that you can handle challenges and be ok, that no matter what happens.. fundamentally - you will handle it and things will be ok. self worth is knowing that you deserve good things and do things to keep bad shit out of your life and welcome good things. Confidence is having both and the competence to do something. The knowledge that no matter what happens - things will be fine - paired with a deep self belief that you deserve good things and will pursue them.

 

Aware - you watch what's going on around you. When you enter a new place you pay attention to who is in the room with you. Women, men, bitches, cows, thugs, liars, whatever. You are aware of the internal politics at work and know what's what. You are aware of our global financial and political situation.

 

Strength - This is strength of body, strength of will, and strength of mind. This mean you push yourself.

 

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Now, to contrast the above - let's discuss feminine traits.

 

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Surrender - she knows that in order to be dominated, she must surrender. Not just to anyone of course, only to a man worthy of dominating her.

 

Receptivity - I have never met a single woman in my life over the age of 25 with a true hobby of their own. Every "hobby" they mention is something they know almost nothing about - because it was the hobby of a man she was paired with before. A feminine woman is receptive and acts like water, taking whatever shape of the vessel containing them. I have seen women completely change music preferences and hobbies, seen them change friends. On the other side, I have seen women become strung out drug addicts because their "man" molded them into it.

 

Empathy - There are two varieties of empathy. The first is the obvious, she can feel your frustrations and pain. She emotionally reacts to sad stories on the news and facebook. She has the capability to feel what others feel. The second half of this is the power of empath - to intuitively know by facial expressions, body language what other people are feeling. To just intuitively "know".

 

edit - down below are some challenges to the empathy claim. I wrote what I wrote based on my own experience but I see their point and want to re-think how to word what I was trying to say. For now, I'll defer to the comments below, which are more interesting than the 4 lines I wrote originally.

 

Radiance - I do not know how to describe this, but every man knows what this is. The woman who just radiates energy and sexuality even when the conversation is mundane. She has something about her that just positively charges you to be around. In some ways, it is like how being at a quiet lake at sunrise can radiate calm and just surround you in it, a radiant woman is a true treasure to be around.

 

Flow - Like clouds across the sky - like a ballet dancer. Like a tinder date that shows up in a corset and ballet shoes and glides across your hardwood floors. Grace.

 

Sensuality - People mistake this one a lot. Sensuality is not the same thing as sexuality. The root word of sensuality is to be in touch with your senses. Taste, she will kiss and suck on you, delight in chocolate and red wine. Lamb and peaches. Smell, she will like the way you stink - want to steal your t-shirts to sleep in them, Hearing - she will listen to how you breathe at night, obsess over the tone in your voice when you said you had shit to do to try to figure out if her status has changed. Touch - if you cannot make her come with 2 fingers and 60 seconds, or with your dick in 10 minutes, you need to work on it. A sensual woman loves to orgasm.

 

Nurturing - not in a mommy way, but yes. A feminine woman is nurturing to the man she loves and respects. As long as he maintains that respect that is.

 

Affection - if a woman is into you, she will rearrange her entire life to be with you. She will lie to her husband, single moms will find a sitter, young professional women will come home from work to nap so that when you text her at 2am, she can jet over and still be up for work the next day. A woman in love/lust will damn near crawl through broken glass and barb wire to fuck the man they want to be with.

 

Sharing - this is such a simple thing, like when you are sitting down to dinner together and she takes a bite of her entree, says it's good and cuts off a piece to give you.

 

Loving - yes, the "L" word. She has the capacity for love. To give it and accept it. To crave it. Women who cannot love are broken women.

 

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The most rewarding relationship is a masculine man providing strength to a loving woman.
It is rewarding for both sides.

 

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In order to get a loving woman, you will need to elevate yourself to her polar opposite.

Some unknown percentage of attraction is the balance of feminine to masculine. You do not have to be 100% masculine, because guess what - she will not be 100% feminine. However, if she is into you - you can exercise masculine behavior and she will soften and yield to your lead. She will relish in allowing her guard down with someone she trusts to lead her.

 

If you break frame too much, if you are a big ole faker and are lying, or if you decide to change this dynamic in the middle of your relationship - she will react to your softening by becoming more masculine to offset the polarity. If she does not trust you, she will not let you lead her.

 

Everyone who has ever been in a long term relationship or marriage will tell you - "Relationships are work". And it is true. It really is, however what is so often suggested is that the "work" needs to be more communication, more understanding, more respect. That's a load of shit. The "work" is holding up your end of the deal to be the man in the relationship. It means have a job, don't be a drunk, or a video game addict. It means be the man in the relationship. It means be present and be conscious. That is the work, and the best thing is you don't even have to do it perfect - you just have to do it.

 

edit- Back to my opening statement, "alpha.. beta.. sigma.. omega. what a load of crap." I would like to clarify my stance on alpha and beta verbiage.

My reference point on this is that I see these terms thrown about way to often and used in a context which is sometimes incorrect, but far more often just flat out unhelpful. The post over the weekend about how to be a better sigma, by pairing with an alpha and augmenting him. uhh.. what? Or by the "that's so beta" comments. Or the "I am an alpha" comments. Those are dynamically changing concepts, and at any point in the day people will react to the situations differently. The overuse of those terms does not contribute to the dialog in my opinion. Being a better man does not mean you ask yourself, "what would an alpha do?". It is far better to ask yourself, "what are my options and what is my best choice". Chasing the dichotomy of alpha for the sake of alpha does not benefit most individuals. That is the way I see this terminology used most frequently and I am offering an alternative view.

I would also say I am not disputing the concepts of social structure being represented as alpha/beta/omega/etc as much as saying it simply is not that helpful to the conversation. That by focusing on masculinity instead of the overused concept of super alpha, you can recognize things in a simpler construct. You also can remove the "men do this" and "women do this" mindset and polarizing view. There are no shortage of "men" who act just like the irrational women we discuss. Feminine and emotional and completely lacking in responsibility or accountability.

 

edit- In the comments there are even reference to .."well this and this".. assuming that because the gender of a person is female that in some way she is a feminine woman. There are plenty of masculine woman out there, and they eat up feminine men left and right. These traits are not gender based, they are character based.

 

edit- if any of the above concepts interest you, consider reading "The Way of The Superior Man". I do not agree with everything he states. Some of it is just too watered down, but the concepts are well defined and laid out. More to the point, forget reading a book. Look at your life, and the relationships you have personally had.