In an XOJane article dated 16 September, the principles and promises of TRP are so perfectly espoused, I initially thought that it was a subversive post- but, sure enough, it appears to be genuine (Oldie, but goodie).
A 30-year-old women is dating a 38-year-old man who ghosts her for a younger women- and she is seeing it everywhere in her social circle.
"Alex is 38. I’m 30. Technically, there are no "people our age.” But I'm starting to feel that a 30-year-old woman might as well be a 40-year-old-man, though infinitely less desirable, culturally speaking."
Well, if the shoe fits, Tinderella...
"At 40, a man is well into hitting his stride, something the guy I’m arguing with is all too aware of, as evidenced when he professes on multiple occasions, “I’m an amazing guy." “We’re killing it. KILLING IT," he tells me, while explaining that he’s been caught up in his rapidly expanding architecture firm."
Alex knows what's up. He's teeming with options and can't help but indulge.
"Alex sees his stock rising. For a man, age brings success, wisdom, and the Hollywood-approved wrinkles of Robert Redford. And, while I too find that my career is on the up, it doesn’t matter, because time, for a woman, is hardly as kind as it is to a man. My career successes, my triumphs as a human being, are trumped by the fact my looks -- and my ovaries -- have a shelf life. Biology and Sociology 101."
No amount of "girl power" t-shirts or feminist lectures can change the reality of the relationship dynamics. Finally, after hemming and hawing the shoe drops:
"...after nearly an hour on the phone explaining that he’s been so hot and cold because he’s too busy with work, because he’s very into expanding his business, because he’s shy -- admits he’s been seeing some 20-something girl named Anouk for the past few months."
Despite the evidence staring her in the face, she must- must rationalize:
"It’s this logic that has most of my 30-something guy friends dating girls fresh out of college. Girls who, in my experience, are less impressive, less striving, less volatile, less successful, less intimidating, less questioning, less pressing, less complex, less damaged, less opinionated, less powerful, less womanly. They are less, and, to a guy not ready for anything -- like most of the guys I have dated in New York -- less is more."
Because, obviously, younger women are inferior to older women. Isn't that convenient? I'm sure she didn't feel that way 10 years ago. Stick with it, guys- it's working.
If you aren't Chad now, be Alex later.
Original article (visit at your own peril): XOJane