Just finished a "pull" with a self proclaimed "feminist". (I found this out after she was at my house). During our time together, she brings up that she's on anti-depressants... then goes on to tell me how she's obsessive, yet hates guys that obsess over her. Long story short, I did not have sex with her; it felt like having sex with her would open a whole bag of bullshit I didn't want to deal with. She was literally begging me to have sex with her, and I passed. I said, "I really like you, I think you're sweet. There's a cool guy out there for you, but we can still be friends." Needless to say, this makes her want it even more. Truth be told, this girl was about a 5-6 face with a 5-6 body. I haven't pulled in a while so I needed an ego boost. Once I found out this chick was damaged goods, I threw the little critter back into the pond. When I dropped her off, she was pissed off I didn't fuck her. Go figure. Either way, I feel like I'm getting back in the swing of things. Hopefully, I'll be pulling better quality going forward. But anyway, the point of this post is that anti-depressants are typically a red-flag. Don't brush them off. Take them with the respect that they deserve and avoid getting into bulshit.
That will severely limit your datingpool because many of them are on it.
A large swath of women are on anti depressants. What he says to avoid is women who say they are.
Same as damaged chicks. If one tells you on the first date she was raped, vs one who was, but got over it and doesn't talk about it.
One is a problem, the other is a cry for validation
About 1/4 women, and 1/10 Americans in general are on them. Says a lot about a lot of things.
Edit: source
https://mobile.nytimes.com/blogs/well/2013/08/12/a-glut-of-antidepressants/?referer=
Yeah it means 3/4's of the female population is going un-medicated.
I, too, see memes on Facebook
That particular funny line is way older than FB
https://i.sli.mg/vVN0D5.png
That's 1/4 women over 40, my dude. No one should be screwing them anyway
The large swath of people on antidepressants probably feel that life happens to them. Most are passengers on a voyage and the voyage sucks. People need to captain their own boats, not constantly bum rides and expect it to be catered.
Id rather be with someone who is depressed and on anti depressants than someone who is depressed and unmedicatex
Don't EVER date a girl that was raped, EVER. It doesn't matter if she is lying or not. Both are damaged.
The point is, if she isn't mentioning it, it's not damaging her, and you can't base decisions on something you can't know.
Like N count, you'll never know, you can only judge by her current behaviours, and someone latching onto the ultimate victim card is not worth it.
either way, you'll have a woman who was assaulted, and doesn't mention it ever. She is either hitting red flags or isn't, so the assault really doesn't matter... If she won't shut up about it,
Its a double edge kind of thing. Because if she doesn't mention it and push you into a relationship with her, you WILL find out eventually and you might be already invested in her. So she manipulated you into a fucked up situation.
She HAS to mention it to you and it better be early on so you can move on.
I've known a girl that was LEGIT raped at knife point. It 100% will fuck up a womans life.
I've known one that was too, not by knife. we never dated, and she was fine. Only thing out of it was a serious hate on for weak men, it amplified her need to find a strong man to protect...
Regardless, I don't find these hard and fast rules useful, I much prefer to observe whats right in front of me, instead of looking at the checklist.
N count, assault, X... She scored a 3, better dump her!
Because when AWALT rears it's ugly head, none of those stats are going to matter, better off keeping eyes open
the mistake is to have a relationship mindset, for me all relationship have an expiration date. maximum two years then i find a new savor.
What are things to observe that can indicate a high/low N count? Is a high N count necessarily bad? (I often prefer girls with experience in bed as opposed to a clueless virgin)
nothing, thats the point.
She will hide it as if her life depends on it. Best you can do is be completely non judgemental, and if you get her drunk, it may slip out. Even then, you can't trust it, they lie to themselves about it as well.
if she is a freak in bed, it can be a good indicator.
I don't frequent TRP so excuse my ignorance, but why is damaged bad? A majority of the girls I've slept with were damaged in one way or another, one told me she loved me during a one night stand. They're all great sex.
Damaged can be bad but isn't always. Issue happens when damaged girls go a little crazy on you and fall apart. They can turn violent (usually happens with victims of child abuse .. perhaps due to the lack of control they had in the situation (or rape I suppose)) they can also turn stalker if they have mental issues.
Once you sleep with a girl that's mentally unstable, she can make your life hell if she wants to. It's just dangerous.
Also.. everyone is damaged in life. It just depends on how damaged you are. Take it on a scale of 1 - 10.
1 is mostly a clean life with a 2 parent household and regular issues. Maybe parents divorce. No mental issues.
5 obviously is average.
10 would be the girl that wasn't loved as a child and sold for sex by her mother. She was raped as a teenager and developed mental issues like extreme bipolar and perhaps disassociative personality disorder. She may lack empathy entirely depending on how bad the child abuse was or if she was never loved. This is how you breed psychotic people. Male or female doesn't matter here.
So the higher up the crazy scale you go, the more dangerous it is. It's shit like getting your dog murdered for leaving a girl, or getting your tires slashed.
Don't stick your dick in crazy.
Edit: typo
And that's why crazy girls are great for crazy sex, and not an actual relationship.
My recent ex of 2 years had bipolar, DID and borderline personality disorder. It was utter chaos. But she didn't choose being this way. I don't think I have to add it left some scars on me which I had to work on to resolve.
And one little badfeel or bit of shame will net you a false rape accusation.
Managing risk is good, but you better put in the effort to protect yourself.
Oh rape accusations isn't really a thing where I'm from.. At least not fake ones. But I understand, probably also risking her skipping the pill or something.
Ahhh, but the ones with that history are always good for kink.
They've all been raped brother.
When I first started dating the man who is now my husband, he called me up to make plans with me and I told him I would be busy for a little bit but could meet up later. He asked what I was up to and I told him the truth - I had a therapy appointment. He later asked me why I go to therapy and it led to a conversation about depression and anxiety, and that was the last it was brought up.
I'm just curious about your logic. Should I have lied to him and not told him about my therapy/antidepressants? I agree with the statement that people - not just women - who voluntarily bring up such things without prompting are generally seeking validation. But what about a situation like the one I was in? Of course I didn't want to come across as crazy, but I also am strongly against lying about anything - especially to the man I'm with.
I know many people dealing with issues. The best don't deny the issues. The worst are addicts. The key is not to deny something, it's to be realistic and honest. If you husband had left you due to your honesty about what you were dealing with, would you really have thought it a complete loss? TRP is for men, but many if these rules apply to both genders. Does the dude who works out hard, eats well and has a high paying job but rubs it in your face and makes you feel stupid for not being as "good" as him seem like a catch? No, not in the long run, because his confidance is based on lowering others, not betting himself.
The happiest people understand this.
No, probably how you handled it. You just said you were busy. If you don't need the validation of being the 'wounded woman' and eliciting white knight responses, and only mentionned it because he pushed (which he really shouldn't have cared)
And just judge by your behaviours. Ignore what she says, watch what she does.
If you're doing all the right things, whats inside your head is your issue, if you're genuinely dealing with it, and ask for help, most guys who take you under their wing (relationship) are more than happy to assist.
The alternative is co dependancy, and that's what I'm talking about avoiding here, ultimately
This is because women in general listen to their doctors and they dont realize doctors are there to make money just as much as they are there to actually cure problems.
/U/scurvmech this is your wheelhouse... Thoughts?
It's all a cry for attention. Ignore and do you, you know in your gut what you want to do
They're saying 1 out of 5 women are now on a antidepressant.
26% of women are on some type of mental medication.
15% of men are on some type of mental medication.
16% of women ages 20-44 are on AD.
8% of men ages 20-44 are on AD.
Data from 2010. Here: http://apps.who.int/medicinedocs/documents/s19032en/s19032en.pdf
TBH, despite some people who desperately need the hormonal balances required to maintain homeostasis in how they feel, I guarantee you the majority of those people were just lazy and don't work out (which is a natural endorphin enhancer), or their psychiatrists pushed this on them as an easy out for $$$. Either way. I'm still a pretty firm believer that society and tech reduce the amount of times our fight or flight responses are naturally engaged (as our hunter gatherer ancestors used to have to live with) and that this lack of instances in our lives is the root cause of depression. Exercise/ working out is the closest thing we get to activating fight or flight other than making reckless/life threatening decisions.
This doesn't really show the full picture, imo, because women don't really feel the need to workout like men. It isn't really ingrained in their biology.
Women mostly want to be mothers, only a small percentage of women are natural sluts. Some girls are born to be sluts and love to fuck, but most don't.
But now... every girl is born to be a slut, they take the pill to not get pregnant and fuck aroung, all the while fucking up royally their hormonal balance. And this along with the pressure of working like a man.
Being promiscuous feels good for most men, women aren't wired this same way, they don't feel good after sex like men do most of the times, unless they are getting something out of it.
Feminism is the biggest shot in the foot for women.
I don't understand what you're getting at.
Women in hunter gatherer societies before the dawn of technology and advanced civilization still had to endure fight or flight situations. They still had to travel in nomadic situations, gather resources, protect their children, run like hell away from danger whilst carrying said babies, even try to fight off men who tried to rape them to reproduce. This still took a degree of fitness in order to achieve (sure not as much as men, but to a degree, thehy did). You still read about early primates and their version of AF/BB. Females put out for Alpha while sometimes, 5-15% of the time, they would willingly mate with betas in exchange for resources. This evolutionary trait has existed for hundreds of thousands of years. Also, the fat acceptance movement has done wonders to increase the statistic of depression. Literally everything about this society skirts away from the question "could it just be you? Could you just be in a negative feedback loop of being lazy, not taking care of your body, and living a sedentary lifestyle, which naturally leads to less endorphins, epinephrine, and 'feel good' hormones that makes you naturally happy?" Granted when it comes to working out, a "healthy/athletic" woman still needs to maintain a 14% to 25% BF percentage to not have birth complications (if you ever want to have a child), but every case is different and some women can be less.
Instead of realizing these natural imbalances caused by easier lifestyles, third wave also externalizes all faults and makes it easy to shift blame towards environmental situations. (ie questions like: "Are you stressed at work?" "Have you been arguing a lot with your family?" "What is your home situation like?" "You are beautiful just the way you are! Eat more of that ice cream!"). Ever notice how women love the thrill seeking component of cheating/ wild vacations/ etc? It's cause that is the closest thing they get to fight or flight. "Oh my husband is going to be so mad when he finds out. This is so exciting!" The risky behavior gets the heart racing for women that they would usually experience if they were in a dangerous situation. (Fight or flight). Almost getting caught while fucking in the woods, anything that triggers a heart racing stimulus is something they seek. If they are set in a normal civilized setting and following rules, that's when they feel more depressed. Women love dangerous/thrill seeking things that get their jimmies rustled cause that's what nature is designed to do. We just suppressed with with the societal/technological advances that came way too quickly.
I can agree that other pills and contraceptives that mess up the natural balance of hormones in a woman also add to the depression statistics. Overall, women in general take more drugs than men do and this can cause a great imbalance. I only know a few cases where a woman has drastically improved due to birth control/anti-depressants, but I think this is an exception to the rule. I stand by the theory (though not wholly proven) that the lack of acute stress responses (fight or flight) and the influx of comfort in our lives leads to depression and emotional problems.
I feel like depression is more rampant among women these days because of feminism/this modern day society externalizing issues. I think dual mating strategy always existed within women (thus AWALT). As for today's society and tying this back to OP's post, I think women telling men they are suffering from depression is the beta seeking behavior in her dual mating strategy where she is trying to find her white knight to provide resources and comfort for her. It's just a developed strategy to ensure she can get a guy to take care of her by appealing to their emotion/ sympathy while she can then freely go and find her alpha.
You might be on to something, but my genetics are completely fucked and I do not function without meds. The bulk of people on my dad's side of the family either suicided or murder then suicided. When I hit 13 something felt very off. I loved working out and still do, and naturally get that feel good rush when you move some weight around, but for some people it's more than that. For some people we really should have just died the fuck out from natural selection, but in the modern era we live.
I have my normal "I feel good right now and I'm happy that I never stop progressing I am so proud of the man I am" feelings, but sometimes you get swallowed up by "why am I continuing right now walk outside into traffic and end it because life is irrelevant hell go die to a bunch of cops while holding a knife."
I wouldn't say that most people REALLY need them and it's situational, but some of us are FUCKED.
Thanks a lot docs and pill companies...and lazy people. Sheesh.
Yeah some quack of a doctor tried prescribing me Zoloft or something after talking to me for like 10 minutes... I was like WTF? I don't need a fucking blue pill. Then I found this place.
I begrudgingly went to dinner with my SJW friend from high school (who btw is a forced lesbian - no man will have her) and was shocked when the conversations were about travel, sex, celeb gossip, and which girls were on what anti depressants and what they want to switch to next. I was utterly shocked at how correct you guys have been. These women are toxic to each other, but deserve only each other.
You filter out fat girls. Why not apply more filters.
I'm very tempted to scrape girls who drink off my dating pool. That'll be a tiny ass pool, but who cares. Not me.
It's better to limit your dating pool than to endure the antics of a crazy chick. Never, never stick your dick in crazy unless you can run away and cut all contacts afterwards.
The OP said she's on a anti depression, not bipolar medication. There's a difference
Agreed. My limit is 2 red flags. Anything more and plate is all they can hope for. Ever.
More than 5 red flags and I don't even stick my dick in it, often I won't finish the date.
I'm not having any issues finding girls, birds of a feather and all that. Find a good girl, chances are reasonable there are others surrounding her or in her cohort.
care to share what your red flags are?
Exactly this, anti-depressants are part of the drugs that doctors prescribe for just about anything. If she were to have a medical marijuana card to treat some form of depression or related condition, would you say no to EVERY girl that smokes weed?
If she would be on Medical Marijuana that would make depression BETTER. It is very natural and promotes homeostasis. Most anti depressants make things WORSE.
Not always mate. Use logic.
I agree, I was just saying that he says Anti depressants = Depression = stay away
By the same logic, Medical marijuana to treat depression still is Medical MJ = depression = stay away
Also, anti depressants are used to treat more then just depression. Eating disorders are treated with anti depressants among others
Plenty of women have cheated, you don't date the ones that admit it openly. Same thing with antidepressants.
You'd rather have a girl not admit that she's cheated in the past?
I'm from Victoria, BC...where women outnumber guys about 5-1, but 4 out of the 5 are batshit insane.
5-1? No city has that kind of ratio. 2-1 would be insane.
Chicktoria, the land of milk and honey...and crazy.
After a quick google search, in the age range 15-39, there are more men than women in Victoria.
5-1 lmao
Thats because CFB Esquimalt is there to skew the numbers. 10k guys in a single workplace.
That's because men are invisible. /s
Lol, my old stomping grounds. Honestly, if it weren't for our insane food supply, they would starve to death what with all the food restrictions.
And you should get around some. They aren't as pleasant as the mainland (not Van) girls, but they are also less violent. Out of all the places I've lived, I put Vic in top 3 for women, next to the okanagan/north thompson, and red deer ALTA.
not often i see red deer mentioned on reddit lol. what did you like about it?
The chicks. Im a redneck at heart, and have extended family there
Land of the newly weds and the nearly deads. Ahh, memories.
ferry freakout is my fav youtube video
that happened in victoria
There are two types of neurodivergent person:
The excuse giver with an external: "That's not my fault! I have (insert disorder)".
Then the healthy person with an internal: "I'm aware of my biological shortfalls and I've taken the steps necessary to prevent them from having a negative effect on my life".
The person who mentions their disorder early on is most likely the former. Thing is there's a difference between mental illness and mental health problem:
If properly treated, many disorders won't have any impact on one's day to day life. Think ADHD, depression and even bipolar can be managed similarly and isn't a red flag. The key is to move on if you discover that they're the former rather than the latter person and leave early if you can't spot the difference.
I only thought it worth mentioning because I've had comfortable arrangements with the TRP notorious bipolar women and a range of others over the years, in the end the healthily managed individuals are no more erratic than any other partner.
Its all about taking ownership over your actions and behavior. You may be depressed, have anxiety, bipolar, etc and you are at a disadvantage to thosd without. You are still conscious though. You need to learn to become aware of your body and mind to "fight" those battles.
"Fuck you depression, Im going for a run today because I know if I lay here today, Im going to lay here again tomorrow and its going to worsen."
"Fuck you anxiety, Im going out to meet this girl for the first time and even though Im nervous and have no clue how it'll work out, Im at least going to try."
I didnt fail in school because of depression, I failed because I didnt know how to handle it yet. I was conscious of what was happenig at the time and didnt fight back. I accepted it as something out of my control and played the victin card, but I dont blame depression. I blame me for not handling it better.
And learn to accept you'll feel shitty at times! BUT it isnt going to be forever. I know this because I have depression and anxiety. Once in a whike I cant shake off that doom and gloom feeling but I know that the tide will turn the other way if I stick to my routine even if I dont see the point in those dark days.
Kind of off on a tangent but Im 100% sure there is someone who is depressed and feeling sorry for themselves that need to see this and take ownership over their situation.
In regards to women with mental disorders, generally stay away. Its a gokd rule of thumb as it would be for women tk stay away from men with nental disorders. But if they do have it, make sure theyre proactive about it and not reactive. Make sure they take ownership of their lives and arent helpless victims.
The phrase I was planning to use in my comment was "take ownership", looks like that won't be necessary.
Also extra emphasis on this:
Once we realize that whatever our disadvantages, the world does not give a single fuck and will just steamroll us all that much more easily, it's on us to handle things. You can let it gradually kill you, which is understandable I suppose, but you'll be missing out on so much. The experience of conquering your bullshit and gaining tangible new abilities is unmatched.
How do you know it "isn't going to be forever"? Unfortunately, there are no known cures for mental illness. Many people suffer from them until the day they die.
Yours is a great reply. But I still think that it's worth stating a blanket statement of "run away no matter what" here. Most of the people here won't have the maturity to be able to safely deal with people with mental illnesses. Easier to just stay away from them.
I don't disagree with you, caveat being that the person in question can't spot the difference.
Some conditions can work in your favour if you're a dark triad type. Most of the excuse givers are more than happy to give lengthy specifics about their diagnoses, coupled with personal experience and the DSM-5, you can have a pretty strong idea of what makes them tick; then play it to your advantage going forward.
Red flags with nuance, I suppose. "Never stick your dick in crazy (unless you know what you're doing!)" Some crazy girls can be good fun; this applies less to the healthy types however. Most of them are no different to you or I. With a good mental health plan and therapist, things like antidepressants are used when warning signs of the disorder have begun to manifest and act to balance the person out in the initial phase so their life can continue as normal until they balance out and can phase the medication back out. It's a utility; keeping levels of the neurotransmitters high improves communication between the nerve cells which strengthens the circuits in the brain which regulate mood.
The DSM-5 is useless. Go back earlier. A lot of psychologists go by 4.
In 5 they've even included being anti-authority as a disorder. I guarantee you each and every one of us on here could find something that applies to us in it (which of course is what they want - make everything a disorder = control).
that's because mental "syndromes" are effectively just collections of symptoms that manifest as a pattern. it's not the diagnosis that causes the problems, it's the problems that create a diagnosis. syndromes are basically just neat labels you can put on people that have things in common.
Of course you can classify the whole world according to things in the DSM, it's meant for that. Nobody is perfectly mentally healthy and everyone has character flaws that represent major mental problems. Some people's flaws are just more accepted than others. What's the difference between a fear of clowns and a fear of unpatterned space anyways? It's only a problem when it's severe.
Heaven forbid a depressed person gets a hold of your sperm and then you're the cause of the next generation of genetically encouraged depression.
Because if there's one thing this subreddit is proposing is to always take the easy way. Right.
You're missing the point of this sub. There are two main views:
Amoral sexual strategy. From this POV, why should you spend your time and effort with a crazy woman when there are millions of others you could be pursuing? It's a cost-benefit analysis, really.
Self-improvement. Yes, improving one's self is really hard work, done a bit everyday until you die. But, remember, it's call self-improvement. You're doing hard work for yourself. Doing hard work for the sake of a broken bitch is useless, and it's called "captain save-a-ho".
I can't tell you just how wrong you are. This is a HUGE step for a person with a PD to get to. Before that, this person operates under the MO "everyone is different and stupid, they should be like me." That is why PDs are PDs, if they didn't operate that way, people would just go "oh, I have some issue, I should stop doing this or seek treatment."
But that's literally not how it works. They live in a different world than neuro-normal people. They see red when others see green, figuratively speaking.
My personal experience with this (uNPD w/ uBPD) is that your disorder will usually become part of your identity, in some way shape or form.
That deep rooted form of denial is what drives most mental issues. Few mental issues are blatant enough to the person who has it that they can see there is something wrong, then see someone, and then manage it.
But to get to the two examples you've given, you first have to realize something is wrong. People with BPD, Bipolar, NPD, HPD etc rarely realize something is wrong. In fact, everyone else is "wrong."
"She's just a prude" is what an HPD would say. "He is naive" would say the NPD, while exploiting that person. The bipolar would rationalize all their behavior as circumstance, time period etc or just blame everyone else, not realizing their cyclical behavior.
This is why people will destroy a family and marriage after marriage, because its always some other reason than themself.
So, long story short. I think your post is incorrect on a pretty profound level.
Yes, but even that huge step is not enough in my books to consider entering any form of romantic relationship. Acknowledging the condition is only part of the journey and may be considered healthier but it doesn't cross my threshold of healthy. I only invest in partners with mental health issues if it's well managed. I haven't got the patience for someone that can justify their actions with their mental illness.
Those I've had successful relationships with were years into treatments, knew the early signs to seek therapy and to excuse themselves if things were getting shaky. The important thing about mental health management is staying on top of it.
Regardless, I can see how it isn't as clear as it could be but I was addressing the antidepressants argument. I initially used ADHD as most people have family members or friends with it and have seen that it can be treated and managed. Meant it more as: Much like ADHD can be managed, so too can depression and bipolar. My reasoning being that I've spent a lot of time with folks with the disorder and some, after treatment, mental health plans and access to the required resources, should it come to it, manage to lead very normal and functional lives that are no different from the perspective of the observer than the neurotypical. Ofcourse there's more going on under the bonnet and it takes time to be at a healthy enough point to self manage.
Not everyone responds as well to treatment or is even ready for that stage yet, I feel for those people. But it's not my problem and I won't knowingly let someone into my life if they haven't reached a manageable stage of treatment.
Essentially saying, yeah you can consider it a red flag but having a mental disorder does not mean that they are cursed to live with the worst aspects of it.
Oh and to add, I meant this as casual relationships/plates. I'm not looking for settle down with someone with the more intense disorders. Depression or anxiety perhaps but the results of a bad patch are less damaging.
You're still missing the point. Your statement is just flat out wrong. The vast majority of people who have PDs, don't know it, and even if you show them an entire book written about them, they start the mental Olympics.
Anti-depressants are in fact a good indicator that someone is emotionally unstable for some reason, and its unlikely that person should be any sort of LTR candidate above plate level.
you're confusing PDs with mood disorders of which bipolar is a mood disorder, not a PD. why does that distinction matter? because PDs like borderline are effectively untreatable at this point in time while bipolar is treatable and can be to the point that it is 0 problem. i can assure you that bipolar people do know something is wrong whereas your PDs do not. i agree with you in general, but if your plan is to talk like you're an expert you should stop talking.
Still doesn't change my point.
This is correct. The type of person to divulge the fact that they have mental disabilities to anyone who isn't their doctor is someone I want to stay away from.
I really like your reply and it is rather rationale; however, mental health problems are still a red flag. Having suffered from depression (but been the 2nd option of just dealing with it productively) and knowing girls with similar issues, crazy is crazy. I would still say that women shouldn't really date guys with mental health issues in general likewise.
That seems to be the general sentiment. It hasn't been my experience, but I have seen and heard many tales of the types of folk that people are describing from a distance.
I just view it as "so long as it's not my problem, then I haven't got a problem", I filter early and strictly on a first date - why I like coffee shops and I've left plates on the table that weren't a good fit for smaller reasons.
I'm a 33 dude with BPD (abusive upbringing) that I manage using mindfulness techniques and CBT stuff. These days it's almost completely undetectable and doesn't effect me at all, but that's only because I made the choice to take responsibility for it and sort my shit out.
Whenever I hear someone saying shit like 'oh, CBT doesn't work for me' I just assume they're hamstering as to why they're special and don't have to put effort in.
Had to post and upvote this. An amazing reply as the distinction between mental health and illness is important to know.
Best way to get rid of a feminist girl is to send her Trump memes
Chuckled. But if you're good enough you may actually convert them instead and they'll start mirroring your opinions as their own to their friends.
Dank memes from dank men will convert the world.
That's such a lame way to put it- "Mirroring your opinions as their own". You make it sound like changing your opinion is a weakness. This kinda shit right here is why people will hold on to outdated, stupid ideals. Cause at least to them, that opinion is theirs and they are strong for holding on to it.
Nope, mirroring is a term used in human psychology to describe a bonding mechanism. It is common and effective. Next time you are with a small child, start mirroring them; they'll open up to you.
Don't even have to be that overt, talk about the Patriots and LalaLand
Why LaLaLand? I haven't seen it
Same as the Patriots Vs falcons. Somehow, white people in a musical = Trump, and black gay director = Hillary.
good post. good job. good advice.
marking these girls as off limits and grooming your pool with rules like this is a great idea.
in days of yore this was called "having standards"
Got divorce raped because I ignored this HUGE red flag in the beginning of our relationship with my now ex-wife.
This is LEGIT information - RUN RUN RUN!
You got divorce raped because you legally married.
He got divorce raped because he didn't take his vaccine (The Red Pill).
This is the best comment reply i've seen all year
You did right. "Never stick your dick in crazy."
It's just not worth the drama and bullshit. Next.
Unfortunately, crazy fucks the best.
Also, Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Dropping her off rejected and pissed isn't the safest strategy. It's probably better to turn on the beta game and start apologizing and saying that you're still hung up on your ex, and it just doens't feel right, etc. etc.
I'm sure someone else has a better mood killer but you get the idea.
You want a real mood killer? Tell a girl about how she reminds you of your mother. There is no quicker way to sry up their panties. Get real emotional about it too.
Learnt this the hard way. But it works like a charm.
Why would you seriously tell a woman that
Used to be a blue-pill cuck. Addict in recovery now. I slowly realising all I did wrong all my life.
Have you watched loose change or thought about any conspracy theories? Have you ever gone against the tv and tried to think for yourself? Have you ever .. Hello? She hung up. Shes gone.
Yep. Hot BPD chicks are a whole other level of sexual awesomeness. Someone that can actually keep up with me. I love it, but it's the closest thing to playing with fire.
I wish somebody told me that when I was 14.
Prepare to live a monk like existence because they're all crazy.
I bet you're dying you say some type of buzz word! How old are you? In the meantime get yourself educated in how depression and crazy has no correlation
Can you really blame them for being on ADs?
They have to work now, will ride the CC 'cause lack of all self control, and at best will shackle up with a loser husband to raise her kids.
They were on them in the 50's also. The real answer is that our societal organization/the way we live/our culture run contrary to a lot of our biological imperatives/needs and it's fucking us up.
I don't get why this post is so upvoted. Dude brings forward an advice but provides zero material to justify it. Sure, dating a girl currently with depression might bring some problems, but which ones? Why run? Your story is just "she told me this. I ran away. All of you should run away if a girl tells you this." Develop a bit, if only just linking to a post that does explain the problem with dating girls that are mentally "damaged goods"
Its just common sense. These type of girls will bring you down with them.
I'm sure it is. I'm only expressing my disappointment that a post giving a "common sense" opinion without any form of data to back it up or analysis would get to the very top of this sub.
Similarly, I will always appreciate a post with the common TRP trope of "get lifting already" as long as it comes with the OP explaining how this changed his life for the best, or analyzing the healthy physical and mental benefits, or providing an example program. But a post that would provide little more than "Hey you know what? I lifted today. You should all lift!" wouldn't deserve 700+ upvotes.
True this post could've been better.
Its a field report. And dont rely on common sense to be common these days. It refreshed my red brain for redflags so gave him an upv
My vast experience says otherwise.
What do you mean? You can't try to fix people. Sometimes the damage is just too much.
Tons of well-adjusted people are on anti-depressants. My fucking dad was on anti-depressants while making 250k/yr and raising a family. All kinds of people are on drugs like that.
There's a difference between a depressed grown man making 250k and a damaged woman trying to get her shit together. But if you wanna be Superman then be my guest.
Have you looked into the stats on this? Fucking most women are on anti depressant or anti anxiety meds
Feels like 4 out of every 5 chicks reveals she has depression about a month into knowing them. We live in such a pussy society full of entitled stupid people who thought their lives would be filled with vacation and lazing around without having to work for it that when the real world hits them, they're asking themselves why Mr. Rogers lied to them about how special they were.
Mr.Rogers was the shit tho
The movie "Taken" was actually based after the true story of Mr. Rodgers.
Not familiar with that guy. Can anyone explain?
"We live in such a pussy society full of entitled stupid people who thought their lives would be filled with vacation and lazing around without having to work for it that when the real world hits them."
God this is so true
I know some people who don't work who do vacations and lazing around and are also depressed, especially if they didn't earn the money they're living on. It's mainly that people don't have good relationships anymore because of social media and modern culture. That, and a lot of food these days is garbage.
+1.
When schools change diets a lot of the time the kids whom were on ADHD meds can reduce or eliminate the meds.
Around 13% of the American population, so not "most women" by a long shot.
most still 'single' women then?
suggesting maybe 37% of women have partners at any given time- sound about right?
There are approx 125M women in America. If 21% are depressed, 37% are taken, 50% of those are either too old or too young, 50% of the remaining are incompatible due to location/finances, and then finally 50% of THAT you don't find attractive, that still leaves you with a pool of 8M women. Since TRP has like ~180k subscribers, that leaves 44 or so potential high quality mates for each of you. If only 30% of those potentials pan out with chemistry, that still leaves you with a pool of 13 healthy, sexy, happy, perfectly compatible women to choose from. Not throw away sex, but like. That kind of sex where you can see empires fall and universes being created. 'Cause if that last sentence doesn't make any sense to you- trust me- you're fuckin' the wrong chicks.
Math and philosophy in one paragraph!
More of them are women than men but a sizable percentage of men use them too. It's mainly full of worthless beta fucks who lack the motivation to improve themselves so they pop pills until they are in the twilight zone.
Clinical depression is a serious condition, not just a mere lack of motivation, seems like you're generalizing pretty broadly when you say only betas take medication to deal with mental illness.
Not really.
The reason the rust belt is in such desperate times right now is because of this. oxy causing heroin addictions because of the costs, SSRI's, deadbedroom men looking for them to mute their libidos. Tons of natural alphas on anxiety meds as well, was surprised the first time some of the guys I've known in the military (definitely naturals, groomed for command etc) would admit to it.
I couldn't say the exact cause, but I would guess that the insane amount of freeloaders, cause those alphas who can lead and get shit done to have to pick up the slack, higher cases of failure, and it's having an effect.
Let's not pretend that faggot ass betas don't take depression meds because they're too weak to change their habits. Yeah, if you're skinnyfat, only have a post-wall slut wife in your life, and no real friends, you're going to be depressed. Maybe instead of playing video games all day these fatties should hit the gym and develop some discipline in their lives.
The point is everyone is taking them, for a variety of reasons. We are talking self medication from alcohol, drugs, medications...
As much as you are holding onto this 'woe is me, women are shit' victim crap, it's got to go at some point. There is no one to blame in your life for your failures than yourself. If your health and happiness were that important, you would burn your current life to the ground and start again.
Right now, people don't know any better way, and let life happen to them, instead of being purposeful in their decisions. You can hand wave it as pussy faggot betas, but it misses the point IMHO.
going with the flow was good when life was largely scripted (e.g. pre 1960) nowadays, you don't have the luxury of a wife, 2 kids, white picket fence, and laws designed to encourage that.
do what you do with that info
Lol, what the fuck? Where are you getting that from in my post? Learn to read, dude. I wholeheartedly agree that we have to own up to our actions-- hence why fat dudes who claim to be depressed need to own up.
No, it doesn't miss the point. It doesn't matter if you're "enlightened" by reading TRP or not-- reality is reality. If you don't make something of yourself in life, the best you can manage to be is some mediocre nobody with a nagging wife and mediocre children.
if anything it's degrading to stoop so low as to fuck such a low quality woman as herself.
Yes, totally agree. Old guy here... anti-depressants go hand in hand with "triggers" and violent mood swings beyond and addition to anything menstral. Also it's a crutch mechanism. "Oh my mess are off" "oh I can't...some side effects". It can become a 3rd party in a relationship that things get blamed on instead of taking personal responsibility.
Psych drugs can be wonderful for people but you don't need to date it. If you're currently involved with someone on psych drugs find out if it was with a psychiatrist or the regular GP. The GP has the power to prescribe but not the extensive training in most cases to accurately diagnose. Patients can go to their GP with their own self-diagnosis and get their drugs after some discussion. I've seen it, experienced it, and dealt with it.
Tools to fuck (less) crazies: her place, hotel room, burner phone, after-sex-text. And ghosting is always the endgame here.
Never settle for sub standard goods, just like when you eat at that shady taco place because your REALLY HUNGRY your gonna regret it the next day.
That being said I am a sick degenerate fucking hypocrite sometimes. My main plate right now has BPD, I simply have mastered avoiding her when I see a swing coming, I set my phone to automatically forward her calls to voice mail, I don't engage her on social media already, I become as scarce as water in the desert. The plus side is when the swing is done she wants to fuck me like my cum is the only thing that keeps her alive.
It is like petting a cat, it is all well and good but if you don't pull away at the right moment your gonna get bit.
And if she's BPD, run SCREAMING in the other direction.
slow clap. God damn you did it mate. Good for you
Deepest sympathy for people suffering from depression, its a terrible thing.
If you hang out with the depressed a lot their mindset will rub off on you.
Make sure they're worth your time if you do decide to help them out.
Trying to help a depressed person is like trying to save an anvil from going underwater. The anvil will go underwater anyways, and you with it.
More like a boat with holes. They can be patched, it just requires effort...and if you don't patch them you'll both sink. Speaking from experience. Things only got better with my depressed LT girlfriend once she really took treatment seriously
I am happy for you. In my experience, mentally ill people are just not fixable and they will only drag down everybody around them.
In all fairness, most don't know how to properly deal with mental illness.
as that girl on AD told me last weekend - I'm a huge mess, I don't know what I want. Well, you're out now. GL finding someone else who will fix ya
I am an electrician, not a shrink. I have no idea how to deal with mental illness and I am not interested in the topic.
Psychiatric medication has its place for the really deep set, psychological conditions. Most psychiatric conditions can be improved and cured, from within.
I had depression in my youth. Therapy and counselling never helped. Self-study, exploring the world and cultivating mindfulness did. Most depression stems from unhappiness with where your life is at.
This. Expectations are a bitch.
Drug experimenting in my mid 20s helped me tremendously
I wouldn't recommend the same to any young guy. Better to just learn self discipline and sort your shit out. You'll find that you have no time to be depressed when you're so busy and so tired from a focused schedule.
I definitely don't recommend drugs for everyone!
I made it to greener pastures a few years ago. I make low six figures with great benefits. I moved out of my parents house. I never really had trouble with women. Not bragging at all, I just always enjoyed flirting and once a woman is caught under your spell you need to be an idiot to lose her. Despite all of this I still struggled with feelings of worthlessness and general anxiety (high stress job). Mdma has got me over my anxiety. I now have a "eh these things happens" approach when shit hits the fan. Also I came to term with how hard I am on myself which contributes to my feeling of worthlessness. When I started easing up on myself I seemed to laugh a bit more and enjoy life, even during hardships. So thanks drugs.
"Most depression stems from unhappiness with where your life is at."
Sometimes people are unhappy for no reason
Over the years , even before being RP, I've dated three women who were on them. Its normally not hard, if you lead a relationship properly, to get them off of them in my experience (unless they are truly crazy, not overprescribed)
The woman I've been with for years, stopped antidepressants within a month of us being together and stopped therapy two months later, that was years ago. The had been doing both for half a dozen years or more.
Women have been as screwed by the Blue Pill as we have been, They are as unhappy, or possibly more unhappy as we are. Once they discover what they have been missing (traditional gender roles with a worthy man leading) they generally straighten right up.
Please, contrary to your own belief, no matter the circumstance : never date someone on anti-depressants. I thought I could get away with it and am here to warn others.
Met a girl that was 8/10, very smart (lots of reading similar to what the sidebar suggests, classic lit and philosophy), coming from a family that's known in the media. Despite her agreeing with feminism, being clinically diagnosed with anxiety and depression, I still thought I was making the right choice.
During a 6 month relationship she : frequently joked about suicide, mentioned her trying to suicide a few times in highschool and very deceptively manipulated me into insecurity, among other events.
Simply say no. Red flags are there for a reason, listen to them.
brah. "manipulated me into insecurity". exactly what I dealt with. She would make remarks to my appearance the first second of us hanging out. literally 10 seconds later, she was on my dick (literally). I was so confused...
no idea why people would do that. We'll bounce back brother
Feel like its for her to feel as if she is the 'catch' and that we're 'lucky' to be with them. :/. thanks my man, we absolutely will.
mental health issues and mental illness, it can happen to anyone. If any of you guys been feeling down and shit please dont hestitate to seek help from a health professional, and check out some of the infoguides on https://www.beyondblue.org.au/
It won't make you damaged goods, less of a man or lower your value as a human being to suffer through and recover from a mental illness. In fact your life will be enriched by it in many ways as you'll become less of an asshole like OP
Except many men who feel "depressed" are just losers who can't change their shitty habits. Of course genuine mental illness exists, especially depression, but let's not tiptoe around it-- leaning on meds to save you is a horrible idea, and it doesn't help that much of the western healthcare system involves doctors avidly prescribing a gamut of medicines with profound mental effects, quickly.
Exactly. If you're depressed, ask yourself this question.
If my circumstances changed and I had no debt, the job I wanted, the home/apartment I wanted and the sexlife I wanted, would I still be depressed? If the answer is probably not than you don't have clinical depression, you just aren't working hard enough.
Having bouts of depression due to not being where you want to be in life is a good thing. Use that pain as leverage to get to where you want to be. You're not a women, you can't just talk your problems away.
It CAN happen to anyone. Does that mean we all should be on anti-depressants? Anti-depressants are fucking cancer. I would never recommend anyone taking that shit. Get professional help without taking those god damn drugs. And please don't forget to take responsibility for your own life and well being, drugs will not help you.
Sometimes people's brains just don't work right and they feel suicidal even though there's absolutely nothing wrong. Those people need to lean on meds because nothing else works. It's better than being dead, or perpetually wishing you were dead, now isn't it?
Meh. They help me. If that makes me a pussy then so be it. But at least I'm not miserable and nervous anymore.
No, actually it means you're a bitch ass pussy faggot. Like you.
This is a truly important guideline to follow. It is absolutely not worth it. The price you pay for the little reward has the potential of being enormous. Even if it does "severely limit your dating pool", so be it. This is from experience. Not worth it.
Chalk it up as a win brother
Fuck you.
I'm on anti-depressant and I'm just fine. (Just kidding I'm fucking miserable. I feel bad for the girl I'm dating.)
A girl taking anti-depressants isn't necessarily a red flag but mentioning it that early is a huge red flag. I'd be more worried about a girl that needs them and isn't taking them. Also, a big problem with women taking SSRI's is that it kills there sex drive.
i think some who take ssri's combine estrogen pills or something. i knew freaks on them.
Orrr.....i recently went on a date and was 5 mins late, she was 15 minutes early. She called me and tried to be playful but yet came across cunty about me being late.
I laughed at her and again in her face when I walked up. When we got to the bar she tells me she had bad anxiety and keeps a bottle of wine in her car. She said me being late made her anxious so she started drinking in her car.
What the fuck is wrong with people.
If she's not on anti depressants she needs to be, and if she is, it's the wrong medication/dosage. And she shouldn't be drinking if her anxiety is that bad, but she uses it to self medicate which means she may be an alcoholic. That's what's wrong with her. Generalized anxiety is no joke, it ruins a persons life if not properly treated.
•The excuse giver with an external: "That's not my fault! I have (insert disorder)".
Met a few girls that have this specific excuse for everything.
Most girls I have met that are on anti deps are very dull and boring
They also wreck your libido.
That's because they're fat. Oh, wait, you meant the drugs...
Dude most women are on antidepressants
Antidepressants completely kill your sex drive and make it really hard to feel sexual pleasure. After you stop taking them, it'll be a while before the insane new sensitivity wears off and you can last more than three minutes. Basically fuck depression.
I bedded a very beautiful blond, bikini model type, before and after she's on antidrepressants. She used to orgasm in every position we tried. After the meds, it was very, very hard work to make her come. To the point I only visited her for the visual of that gorgeous woman naked, but sex wasnt as good as before.
My ex was on antidepressants and had an extremely high libido both before she started them and after. While low libido is a common side effect I'll vouch that it's not always the case.
Regardless of gender, situation, intent, social construct etc... if someone's biggest selling point in terms of conversation is what meds they are on, just go the other way.
When all they have to offer is excuses for their failures and it's supported by their claims of their usually-self-diagnosed afflictions, just go the other way. If they know more about anti-depressants than they do world events, run. If their talk is dominated by reasons why they don't have a good life, and it's circling the anti-depressants drains, run.
For some people, all they have about them which in interesting is what affliction they have, and what meds they are on. Run far away from those people.
Some of society (their own kind) are responsible for enabling this behavior though. It becomes a contest within their groups on who has it worse. "Oh, I don't want to go to the market, too crowded, I have anxiety". Do you? or are you just spineless and awkward so you want to have anxiety because it's a convenient excuse? Current society rewards this negative behavior as well, that's awful. It makes it a lot easier to separate the useful from the useless however, and that's great.
While I don't disagree with your premise about women on anti-depressants, your story here does nothing to support the idea. She was pissed that you didn't fuck her after she literally begged you to, thus hurting her self esteem. She would have felt the same whether on anti-depressants or not, I would imagine. She was a self-proclaimed feminist, another huge red flag, but again there was nothing in your story to suggest that it was problematic. The only actual thing she did that was out of line was to tell you that she was obsessive, but doesn't like guys obsessing about her (ie she wants the power to control her partner, not the other way around). That is in accord with being a feminist, but not necessarily being on anti-depressants. Besides, girls spout all sorts of nonsense to try to impress guys, it doesn't mean it was actually true.
In short, from your title I expected you to be providing another data point, but in fact you are simply making an assertion.
Honest question what are your guys view of a man who is on anti-depressants?
You dodged a bullet, my friend. Speaking as a woman on anti-depressants.
would you care to elaborate?
I'm a 41 year old woman who is married, and on anti-depressants. I know my husband loves and cares for me, but we've been through some shit, before my diagnosis. Just saying.
They're all on fucking antidepressants.
OP and the people who support him - You're a bunch of autistic idiots. Roughly 1 out of 5 people will go through mental illness and the number is just increasing.
Bunch of illiterate cucks
Ad hom. Irrelevant statistic or even a statistic that proves our point. Ad hom. Thanks for playing.
Stay away from handicapped people too, the wheelchair really makes them inconvenient. /s
If being redpill were all about just being an asshole, you'd have it nailed.
What about girls who tell you that they are seeing psychotherapist later on ?
You wrote this post like the average woman who identifies as a feminist is not a red flag, since it tends to have nothing to do with equality, and more to do with seeing all men as both subhuman oppressors and "morally"-justified slaves. =P
I would more likely date a non-feminist on anti-depressants than I would a feminist who is not on any psychological medication.
I think the more logical thing to say is that "I'm on anti-depressants" + "I'm a feminist" = HUGE MOTHER-FUCKING RED FLAG.
I might be late to the party here, but honestly if you were looking for an ego boost, turning her down should be a better boost than closing. Think about it, you had the opportunity if you wanted, but you controlled the situation, frame, and your own willpower to such an extent that you chose not to.
Only a handful of times, and I mean maybe three(?), in my entire life have I had the opportunity to close and decided against it. At first you feel like you are the one who lost, but then comes the realization that you have made the ultimate decision. At least for me personally that's more validating that actually closing sometimes.
There are many types of birth control prescriptions that are anti-depressants.
This is more of a feminist issue. If she is a feminist, nope the fuck out of there.
It's hard to hold frame when you gotta put any effort into someone 😂😂
At least she was honest. An honest hoe. The way you get them to like you is to act in ways you think would make them leave you alone. Eventually they become obsessed. Then what? The more you try to get away, the more obsessed she'll become until it gets scary. So there is an obvious solution here I call "Charging the Bear." The way you get her to leave you alone is by acting in ways you think would make her like you, like subtly mentioning things about yourself you think might impress her, mirroring her texting style. Literally it'll take less than a couple texts and she'll lose all interest.
I posted something about this last week and people thought I was just bragging so I deleted it but I was going to give a live feed of how I get obsessed succubus to leave me alone.
So in about 3 texts, she vanished. I just simply told her I missed her and was thinking about her. I mirrored her expressions. Used a few emojis. All spaced an hour or two apart so she would think I was treading lightly. Anything I would think would make her stick around.
Obviously this is a bold move. A girl is suffocating you and saying she loves you. The last thing you think will make her fuck off is to say "I love you too" but god damn does it work, and in my case it worked very fast.
It's counterintuitive but that's the best way to play these hoes. Say things that would make any rational person run for the hills. You're going to truly think she'll never talk to you again. That's how you know you're doing it right. You'd be surprised the lengths they'll go to win your affection. Only give it to them when you want them gone.
Ewww a feminist.
Thx but no thx
A lot of people are on meds for mental issues. Obviously, some people will use this an excuse to justify bad behavior, but I doubt this applies to everybody. I read a lot of the comments and now better understand the stigma associated with mental health.
You friendzoned her using the exact same rhetoric that women use. Excellent.
Oh man you're waking up to a sexual assault accusation tomorrow.. Good luck buddy
"And here's the door... as a strong independent woman I'm sure you're able to order your own taxi".
You did good.
Antidepressants is bad, the feminist shit is worse. Feminist = anti-male. I'd like to believe that a woman could be pro-female without being anti-male, but it just doesn't exist.
You're missing out on some of the best sex of your life.
This post in no way addresses any real reasons why to avoid a girl on anti depressants. All OP does is provide one anecdotal experience with a girl who got pissed that she wasn't getting laid.
I dated this girl that was clearly highly unstable up and downs. She'd occasionally just start crying out of nowhere. Understandably the well was pretty dry for me at this time and was just trying to fill my bucket regardless of the ph balance or imbalance yuk yuk. One night she left me in her room for a few minutes, I opened a random cabinet to see around 30 to 40 pill bottles. I had already planned making it the last time seeing her. When out of no where she just says I need to go to sleep, proceeds to lie on her bed and was out like a light. I thought well that made this easy I left and never saw her again.
It's still better than someone who needs anti depressants and doesn't take them.
okay so literally 95% of all women.
Is this "feminist" from austin by any chance?
No, you're just an asshole. I have an ex who was on them, and she was a wonderful girlfriend, and a wonderful human being. People with depression and/or anxiety are still people, so stop treating them like they aren't.
As a person who takes psychiatric medicine, I'd like to offer you a nice, big fuck you. Have a wonderful day!
Don't date or plate women who take these prescriptions. You can google them if you want but these are some big ones.
"Truth be told, she's a 5-6 face with 5-6 body, but I haven't pulled on a while and needed an ego boost, but after I found out the was damaged goods (taking prescribed medication for a legit illness) I tossed her back into the pond"
I just don't understand why every one hates this subreddit. It's always full of positivity and love.
Oh come the fuck on. My long term partner is on anti depressants and she's an absolute angel (and a devil in bed). Don't buy into this shit red pill. Use your own judgement, your gut will be a better filter than some random on reddit.
Why would you shoot yourself in the dick like that? Just pump and dump, my friend.
Also, I don't see from your post how anti-depressants are supposed to be a red flag. Because you said so? Because you decided that?
I must say I generally agree. However, I had a gf for a while that was wonderfully submissive and kinky...and I mean wonderfully. Turned out she was on happy pills. I helped her get off them and she went craycray. Oh well, I should've left well enough alone.
Yes you should have, your not a fucking doctor or psychiatrist bro.
Then why did she listen to him?
Respect for your self control. Once a chick is my place, eager to undress, chances are we will have sex unless she has one visible std. And yes, if they're on meds, get the heck out is the safe route
Good job. You exercised rationale thought, restraint and an abundance mentality.
what about anti-anxiety meds?
You should cover your bases and ngaf with any girl, not just those on antidepressants. The problems of your plates shouldn't keep you from doing what you want.
You're missing the point of this post is incorrect on a voyage and the nearly deads.
So lets get together and start making anti-depressants...
As general rule, if she says she is mentally ill believe her. Do not attempt to rationalize it, do not go past go, do not get caught with child support payments.
The statistic I found on this for a post of mine (http://wp.me/p78k8O-nY) showed that within a 12 month period 21.8% of American women can be diagnosed with a mental illness, this covers anything from a slight depression to more serious conditions such as bi-polar disorder and paranoid schizophrenia. The important thing to note is that these are the ones who:
A) Are above the required threshold for diagnosis, and you can be pretty damn crazy and still not reach that threshold.
B) There are most likely plenty of women who just happened to be feeling well in that moment that have a history with mental illness.
A principle of mine that I had to learn from experience is "Don't stick your dick in crazy". Sure, it is fully possible to rationalize "I'll just bang her once and then never contact her again", or "What can happen from just one bang", but many of these women are either addictive as hell in bed, or may file charges afterwards.
You probably saved yourself a rape charge.....good bullet dodging.
How is this helping your ego? Do yourself a favor and don't hit on anything that's below your standard, even if you're so horny that you would even stick it in a donkey.
Honestly, I think OP should've fucked her - then did good aftercare and ghosted as well as possible. This post has so many parallels to the recent post where someone made fun of a nofapper for turning a girl down after getting her home. Only difference is the justification provided. Both sound like hamstering to me. I wonder if there wasn't another actual reason why OP didn't get laid that night...
You fuck a feminist and tell us to be careful if the one taking meds??
As soon as a woman exhibits any of these huge red flags, like was raped, or on anti-depressants, or is feminist, or likes positive consent, or anything, do NOT do what OP did.
Instead, test blue pill theory. Tell her how much you think she's amazing and the best woman ever and how she's so special because she paints her nails.
Talk about your feelings.
Then she will walk away from you. Win win!
(I'm mostly joking)
Yo, speaking of mental illness - any one here ever hook up with a chick deep in the Narcissist pool? That's fuckin surreal. Seemed super cool and edgy (had big titties and nice mulatto skin but also liked art and was good at it) met her once at a mutual friend's and later that night asked if she wanted to hang out the next day (she did)
and that's when it got fuckin weird...right away her first comments upon meeting me are these direct quotes...
"My last boyfriend's dick was as big as my arm!"
"If I saw a guy walking around with his boner out, i'd ask him if he needed help with it"
"Last place I worked out, some guy working there fucked me in his truck everyday, it made all the girls so jealous of me!"
"My ex called me fat...so I fucked all his friends :)"
Now...any sane and rational dude would have taken the next train outta there, I'm honestly just kinda stunned so I can't do much more than smile and play it cool (meanwhile inside i'm wtf'ing so hard, is this the most nuclear of shit tests or what?)
We get back to my place, I put on some cartoons. (she likes adventure time despite being in her mid 20's...just red flags all over the place god damn.) And after a few bongs she very apperently ready to fuck...as she's getting undressed I'm oggling at her massive titties but I notice she's staring at herself in my full length mirror, like lost in a trance checking herself out.
Finally she catches me looking...AND SCREAMS AT THE TOP OF HER LUNGS "STOP FUCKING STARING AT ME!!!!!"
My boner begins to weaken, like what the fuck is happening right now? anyways she lays down on the bed, and I give her titties the good suck like it's my last meal before execution (not only do I love juggz but this gives me a chance to recover from the previous WTF'ing)
However at this point, I notice to her chanting to herself "I shouldn't be doing this, I shouldn't be doing this" over and over again. And right there I had had ENOUGH of that shit, bust line of the goddesses or not if I don't get this girl out I'm going to end up in a fucking cooler at the bottom of a lake.
Getting her out of the house was also a bad ordeal, as you can imagine. the following day I received no less than 14 phone calls in under 5 minutes. I never picked up and that was the end of that.
I have bipolar disorder, type II, panic anxiety disorder, and PTSD. I have no idea why my husband of 19 years sticks around sometimes.
I disagree that this needs to be a blanket issue. There are some women who use meds to control a disorder and get back on their feet.
My girl was when I met her. A year later she wasn't and hasn't looked back. Sometimes you need the support to get through rough patches.
They're a yellow flag. Lots of people are on anti depressants not because they're crazy or damaged goods, but because their brain just doesn't work quite right for some reason. Depression can be something as minuscule as simply being tired all the time. Plenty of people aren't on anti depressants when they should be, so it really doesn't mean anything in a vacuum.
If she's got her Depression under control then it shouldn't be any issue even for an LTR. You need to keep an eye out for signs that she doesn't have it under control, or that she is some other form of crazy.
I don't understand how fucking around with people you're not attracted to is an "ego boost." I'm aware I can get with fat ugly chicks; it doesn't make me feel better about myself.
I've seen people in my immediate family pretty much destroyed by long term use of anti depressants. I'm talking, the person who was there is no longer there. No longer alive. Gone and never coming back. if that's what you want or need or demand , fine. It's your life. Trash my ass all you want. I will not use them. Ever.
Spoken like a true Beta Cuck who thinks he is an Alpha!
LOL!