I just got out of an LTR a few weeks ago and I have been reading TRP for a few months. No contact with the ex after a minor slip up when her mother passed away a week after we broke up. Feeling good, lifting, etc.

I decided to get on Tinder at work and see what I could do. What I have noticed so far is, immediately setting a date is the most effective thing you can do. I may say, "hey, you're cute let's get a drink sometime" or I may wait until the second or third response. It seems that the quicker I pull the trigger, the more excited and receptive they are. It also helps to weed out the validation seekers.

So I made a date with this HB 6 within three messages and set out to meet her a couple hours later at a bar. I walked in confidentiality and gave her a hug, then we ordered a beer. What she ordered sounded good, so I got one as well for a good conversation starter. I asked interesting questions. I touched her arm and laughed when she said something funny. I teased her about being a nerd. She is a math teacher and loves statistics so I had a hard time relating and I honestly wasn't feeling a great vibe yet. When the bar tender asked us if we wanted another beer, I decided to see how she responded and I told him "no, bring us our checks." She seemed a little taken aback. I told her I was heading to another bar around the corner if she wanted to come with me.

At bar number two, she grabbed a table and sat her purse down in the chair next to her. Looking back, I should have picked it up and taken that chair as it killed my chances for kino.

Mistake number one: I missed an opportunity to show dominance and escalate kino.

Still, I could tell by the flow of the conversation and the look in her eyes that I was connecting better this time. Before we knew it, they started closing the bar and we had to leave. I really should have taken her to one more place, but I didn't know of any other spots near by. We were in her city, I just work there and live 30 minutes away.

Mistake number two: I failed to have my logistics hammered out. I planned the first two bars but left room for error after that. I thought I could get her to invite me back after two stops, but the lack of kino at bar number two really hurt my chances.

I walked her to her car and told her to drive me to mine. When we got to the parking deck she said, "I guess I'll let you out here so I don't have to pay to enter. I had a good time!" I gave her the look for a few seconds, then I went for the kiss. I made out with her for like a minute then I playfully stopped and got out of the car. She said, "I had a good time!" again. I told her I had a blast and just walked off confidently. I thought I was doing the right thing by trying not to come off as thirsty or needy.

Mistake number three: I fucked up so hard not telling her to pull in to the parking deck and fucking her brains out in her brand new car. At the very least I should have said we could go back to her place and keep having a good time. If she said no, then and only then should I have played it like it was no big deal. I let so many opportunities to close just slip through my grasp.

She messaged me the next day and said, "I had fun last night! The Bill Withers Pandora station you put on my phone is great." When we were are bar number two, she had mentioned how she liked cooking dinner with a "hot guy" while she was giving me the fuck eyes so I thought I was being smooth when I messaged back a few hours later saying, "I had fun too. Let me know next time you want to get together and I'll bring a bottle of wine over, and we can make dinner together" and then sent her my number. She deleted our convo and I haven't heard from her.

Mistake number four: I should have been more mysterious and waited until later that night, then responded by saying, "I had fun too. Give me your number and we'll do it again sometime." But, I was a dumb ass and spoiled the chase for her.

Rip me to shreds. I want it to hurt so I will do better next time.

TLDR: Recently broke up with LTR. Got first Tinder date. Kiss closed, but fucked up too many times. Set dates immediately on Tinder. Having half of your logistics work done doesn't count for shit. Show dominance and guarantee your opportunity for kino. Assume the close, don't be deterred by small obstacles. Let her chase, she doesn't want to feel like things are just handed to her.