When I was 18 I went backpacking through Europe with my highschool girlfriend. It was a disaster. I was young and excited, she thought of herself as "too mature" for shit like hanging out with other backpackers at a pub. It was hard for me to make friends with people since she'd sit there with a sour puss on until I agreed to leave. So I went to museum after museum just to keep her happy. We still argued a lot. Instead of having the time of our lives, two young people cut loose on a foreign continent, we were like an old bickering couple who couldn't agree on anything. She made a pain in the ass of herself at every opportunity, and it sucked.
Then one day in Prague we met a group of three backpacker girls. They were alright. I wasn't super enamored with them but at least we were hanging out with people our age other than each other.
We started spending more time with them, and soon, without any vote that I remember being a part of, "we" decided to all travel together. Sounds awesome right? A single guy out with four hot young chicks?
Nope. I found myself increasingly the odd man out in their little chick clique. Plus my GF wouldn't fuck me since we were sharing a hostel room with the others.
Betafication and shit-testing toward me increased from all members of the party, eventually devolving into outright disrespect.
The final straw was when my GF and I got into a little argument over something I wanted to do that night. Finally one of the other backpacker girls said, "ok, we'll think about it. Can you go get us some beers while we figure out what to do?" By "get some beers" she meant from the convenience store up the block. I looked at my GF, like, "you gonna let these bitches talk to yo man like that?" Yes, she was. She just looked at me like she agreed with the chick who basically just dismissed me.
I just went icy. "Sure," I said. "Anything else?" They actually did rattle off a couple more things they wanted from the store.
I got up from the common area, went back up to my room, stuffed my backpack, and went to the front desk to check out.
My GF saw me, caused a scene, begged my not to leave, insulted me, screamed at me, cried, told me she loved me... the works. Right in front of a whole youth hostel full of people.
I said something like: "we've both been having a bad time, and now you're clearly having fun with your new friends. Enjoy." And I left her in the dust.
She emailed me a lot begging me to meet up with her again. I thought about it, but honestly I felt freer without her. She cut her journey short and went home. As time went by I got the sense that her desperate attempt to keep me was just a face-saver: she didn't want to admit that she got dumped in Europe for being selfish and disrespectful.
I can't say I had the best time for the rest of my trip. Breaking up with my girlfriend (first love, first fuck, blah blah; and me a oneitis-stricken crybaby bitch) put a damper on things. But I saw it through, met some people, had some adventures, and came home with my god damn self-respect intact.
Never be afraid of walking away.
I dropped my NYE plans with a plate tonight because she had become progressively more demanding/petulant over the course of getting to know her. She recently broke up with her first long-term serious boyfriend and this is the first time she has been single post-HS/College and I was increasingly getting the feeling that she didn't quite understand that the dynamics are different in your 20's. She was used to bossing around inexperienced/passive men.
The vast majority of the conversations were shit-tests ("You should cut your hair." "You're such an asshole."), nonstop intrusive "curiosity" ("what are you thinking about right now?") or her childishly re-litigating settled matters. Every time we tried to make plans it was a small ordeal because she would refuse to discuss things like an adult. Here was how she made plans for lunch yesterday.
@ 3pm, Her: "Wanna get food?"
Me: I've had lunch, if that's what you're asking, but I'm free for dinner.
Her: "I didn't ask if you'd had lunch. Why are you so difficult?"
Here is how she made plans for tonight:
@ 2pm, Her: "Wanna come over tonight?"
Me: Yeah.
Her: "What time were you thinking?"
I held my tongue at this moment because that's one of the female habits that irritates me the most: Suggesting a plan and then immediately carrying on as if you're not the one who suggested it. She does the bare minimum required to get the situation going "her way" and then gives up all responsibility and expects me to see it through. Anyway, I told her I'd be ready sometime around 5 or 6 because I had yet to reach my tipping point.
So I leave for her apartment around 6, but there's one final hurdle. Her apartment complex is gated and requires either a card, a code, or for you to dial the unit from the callbox at the gate. Well, she has YET to properly setup her gate code or call-box function with the main office, so every time I go over there, I have to sit at the gate like an idiot waiting for someone else to pull up and just hope they drive through quickly enough for me to follow them. She throws a fit when I ask her to come let me in. Well, tonight, after sitting there for ten minutes, I asked her to come let me in. Of course, as soon as I do that, a car pulls up and I'm able to get in, so I immediately call her to say "don't worry about it" but before I can even get a word in she answers the phone with "UGH! I hate you."
So I turned around in the first cul-de-sac and drove straight home. She starts texting me "Did you leave?!?" and my name over and over. When I get home I send her a text. "We're not compatible. You're bossy and demeaning when you should be agreeable or understanding, and you're passive and distant when you should be open or assertive. I'm nipping this in the bud now."
Her response: "Well I guess it's a good thing you didn't come over tonight because I would have fucked your snide cynicism through the wall." As if I needed any more proof that her entire sexual strategy was "muh vagina" and "insults," she told me exactly what I needed to hear to feel great about never talking to her again.
To which I said "That's borderline word-vomit" and she proceeded to melt down and switch from sweet-threats to an outright tantrum. Which I ignored.
Point being, don't jump through their hoops unless they're worth it, and most of the time, the ones that are worth it don't treat you like an hourly employee.
damn i like your style. you handled this really nicely. but what i personally wouldve done was just disappear from the getgo. the moment i realize its not going to work, i pull a bunny from a hat, clap my hands, and vanish into thin air.
amazing, you must be some sort of magician. i like your style better
Better thing to do - if you sense any disrespect from anyone then you just immediately, slowly and patiently tell them you don't like it and they couldn't act in this way with you. If they become nice, then its good. If not then there is two paths. Either make them understand you can stop all and any relationships with them, unless they follow your rules. Or, in case you can't isolate yourself from them, make them understand you are ready for conflict, unless they behave well. It works much better than just vanish, or provoke conflict from the start. Most people afraid of conflict with someone who are not afraid of conflict with them. xD And if you have some value (and by behaving in such way you automatically do) then they wouldn't want end any relationships with you either.
I don't disagree. Her and I had already talked about her knee-jerk negativity/petulance before. Sunday night was the last straw. I had better things to do on New Years than spend it with a chronically judgmental woman.
I didn't go in to it in the first post, but she had also expressed problems with the fact that I'm not a Christian even though literally nothing about her life would indicate she's a Christian. I've had too much experience with girls like that in my past. If you're kind and don't fuck on the first date, then I'll respect your faith and probably go to church with you. If you're just another run-of-the-mill easy bitch who uses "faith" as one more hoop I'm expected to jump through in order to properly thank you for your pussy, I have no time for that.
Just got one thing to say.
Fuck yeah.
This is a great story that I think most ex-bluepill guys can relate to. We get flashes of the red pill, especially at the height of our misery. The natural state of a man is not to be subservient to a woman, as much as pop culture and academia tries to beat that into us.
All it takes is one or two shit-show relationships like that, followed by some research to come to the realization that AWALT. Once you can swallow that red pill, and free yourself from a life of misery and humiliation, you can live your life the way it was intended.
I love how this is, right now, at 440+ upvotes.
IKR? Wasn't expecting that lol
69th upvote ——————— fuck yeah
Ya don't have to be a quick learner. Just a learner is enough.
Although some people may feel that this reads as a blue pill revenge fantasy, it really isn't.
This is the key lesson here. Always do what's best for you first. By putting yourself first you retain your self-respect which is best for both of you in the long run.
She still hates you, I know that much. I mean, REALLY hates you. Like, tells random people she barely knows what an asshole her ex-bf was, abandoning her in Europe, all helpless and alone and stuff.
And, with each re-telling, the Legend grows!
Based on my research, women who badmouth prior boyfriends are undatable. If she makes efforts to make sure you never know who he was, then it's a huge red flag, he's got dirt on her that would make you run, not walk away. That's why he was such a monster.
I've never met a girl that didn't have an "abusive ex."
Oh I know. I left this part out of the story, but there was a lot of drama from back home. My parents, her parents, mutual friends... Everyone all "HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO HER!?"
They were trying to guilt trip you, just view it like a shit test (but instead of one from a girl, its from almost everyone you know).
I would've responded: "She has a passport"
You did what you had to do. Whether you had more fun without her, or not, is irrelevant.
I probably would let my intentions show, leading to the scene at the hotel front desk. Staying cool enough to pack and check out without tipping anyone off would be better. The slow realization that you hadn't come back with the beer, then noticing your backpack and other belonging were gone, etc. That sequence would have been more troubling to her in the long run, and perhaps more instructive.
That's actually what I was going for. I thought a vanishing act would be the biggest "fuck you" I could possibly give. Oh well, busted.
Hey, don't worry; you did your part! This OP will be long remembered by me, as well as others.
At least it lead to a catharsis.
Good for you though on sticking to your guns; it always feels easy in situations like that to cave in, but it's important to experience those initial feelings of dread when you put your foot down.
That's a damn fine story. Reminds me of something I did once, many years ago:
I went to a punk rock show with
my girlfrienda chick who had glommed onto me and was monopolizing my time, at the next town over about an hour away. We were blazing on acid; she drove. She did something stupid and got an attitude about it, so I gave her a dirty look and walked away (2 strikes and you're out). Got a ride home with some mutual friends. I had zero cares about whatever panic she might have experienced as she tried to figure out what happened to me.She came over to my apartment the next day extremely chastened. We never spoke of it. She increased the drugs and food she brought me and some extremely freaky sex acts until I got sick of her shit altogether.
I'm no Red Pill natural wizard, but I look back on shit like that and feel good about having some RP instincts. And I'll leave you with one of my bedrock TRP principles:
Never be afraid of having a woman be mad at you.
What stands out for me here is that, you may have made that decision in a split second, and then found it harder as time went on as the oneitis shite kicked in. It does that, No matter what pills you're gobbling down. But props for 1) Acting on impulse. Your brain just went - fuck off, I'm not having that like. And you were right. Right in that moment and still right afterward even though the brain started to run its beta programming. And 2) You stayed the course. Easily the hardest bit -especially if you're pre red pill and haven't developed the confidence and abundance mindset. Some of these OP's post like it don't fuck with you. But when it does and you still stick to your guns, you the man bruv. Respect.
I did the same thing, was traveling with a friend with benefits in Asia. Second night she fucked some other dude, then came back to me crying the next morning. We travel for another day, she is a non-stop bitch. I let her know we’re parting ways, she begs me to stay one more night with her and help her plan to do the rest of the trip alone. We go out, she drinks herself into a stupor and starts going up to everyone she spots on the streets of Bangkok looking for weed. I tell her I’m out.
Wake up the next morning to find her in Thai jail for attempting to buy off a transvestite under cover cop. I bailed her out of jail and told her to never contact me again.
Periodically she messages me and I don’t respond.
That was decent if you. I would've left her ass in jail.
Nah leaving her in a Thai jail for a drug offense is harsh. They're not strangers.
fuck em, pussy pass checks need to bounce for them to realize they gotta change their behaviour.
Thai jail too much brah be a decent human
Depends how good she was to him, if she was altruistic towards him then fair enough he owes her, but if she was a cunt and it was just about getting his end wet, then yeah let her rot.
Thai jail might have straightened her out
For white males, maybe. For hot chicks??
That's the point. Her example either taught others like her a lesson.
Was the cop a transvestite?
An 18 year old (girl) says they're too mature for anything, lol.
Women are luxury expenses, not assets. You have to have your shit together with extra time/money/energy to spare for her. In any other instance, they are burdens and hold you back.
It's the only thing you've got. One day you'll look back on this and laugh at the former silly child you were staying with a dumpster fire of a woman and you'll be quicker to shut that shit down with haste.
You're going to go on and do great things, she will go home and find some other poor beta male to dominate, leech off of, then plant her life into. All those words to try to get you to take her back, and you dismissing them all was you dodging a bullet. If you could package up this little lesson and give it to all the males in America, you would be doing everyone a great service.
She was just toying with you anyway, using you as practice for how to find a man's breaking point, and how to hover just underneath that. It's insidious, but it works. The only women who survive are able to read men and play them like a violin, tuning their behavior to just below the "get the fuck out and I want a divorce trigger" so that they can see how much they can get away with, how little effort to put in, and yet still extract off all the very best that you bring to her.
You still have a ways to go, she was just level 1. There are many more games to be played like this one, that you aren't aware of yet. She wasn't able to read you very well and went way over your breaking point. You're in for level 2 next time, where you find a woman who knows your breaking point better than you do, and she doesn't let you break up with her because her hold over you is that good. Unicorn heroics, cosmic joy, best thing ever.... up until the marriage then she makes off with half your stuff and now you have to tell dates that you've been married and divorced once.
This sounds like comic book villainy lol. "She'll know you're weaknesses better than you do!" "She'll betray you when you least expect it!" Calm down a bit... You think girls are just planning it from the beginning? Isn't it more possible you just fall out of love with someone and want an excuse to break up? I'm not trying to say some women wouldn't do that. It just felt like reading a comic book the way you described it.
Such primitive and naive young male ideology that you got from your idealistic parents, your kum-bai-yah dance at liberal public school and female run college, and church/sunday school is why this redpill subreddit exists and is one of the biggest subreddits in the first place.
Buckle up dorothy, because the roller coaster ride is about to start for you when you start dating more seriously. I suggest you read: https://illimitablemen.com/2014/12/14/the-shit-test-encyclopedia and keep reading here. The reason women are the lesser of the two genders in the 3500 year old book of the bible is that the people who wrote it at the time knew that women were the more traitorous and treacherous of the two genders. So much so that they had to be confined to submissive positions so that nations could be built in the first place.
Western civilizations are rediscovering this now after having put women at the helm and the subsequent international disasters. It's not villainy, it's unapologetic machiavellianism. It's the real world, the one that everyone you have ever known has tried to protect you from to date. It's the one this page tries to get across. Ctrl-find for the word villain in: https://therationalmale.com/2011/08/23/schedules-of-mating/
It's not villany, it's survival of the fittest. And when I call you shallow, I'm using the definition in this link: https://therationalmale.com/2012/11/20/shallow/
Mega happy for you dude!!!! Shit, I see people in their 20s & 30s who could never do this. Right on for being awesome at life!
Good job. What do you squat now?
Out of the loop, what's the context?
No hidden context, if you're doing this RP shit you've gotta be lifting. And since this guy says the story's from his BP days, he's supposed to have made progress on his squats.
This bullshit about lifting is so annoying, you all were supposed to already be doing this shit from the beginning. It makes me wonder what kind of people a lot of you were before finding this subreddit.
Before I found this subreddit I was 17 and waiting to join the army. Complete nice guy, believed in soul mates, love at first sight, etc etc. I blame a lot of it on a Christian upbringing by my mother who divorced when I was thirteen. I also didn't lift weights, had absolutely no interest in it.
Joined the army, got married, got her pregnant (she was a stripper, surprise) a month before I was headed to Iraq. Then shit went downhill and I found this subreddit while contemplating some dark shit. I'd say it about saved my life, but before this I was a complete loser.
Edit: it's not that I wanted to be a loser, I just didn't know better at the time. And yeah, I'm Asian so some betafication by that side of my family, but the things they say work in the east where feminazis haven't completely fucked gender roles.
Squating doesnt mean shit. Skinnier uglier regular guys get hotter girls than us. Fuck this gay earth
Skinnier guys take your bitches cuz they don’t give a fuck and you do
Well if i killed them she would have no choice but to fuck me
There is no "us". There's you, and there's me.
I'd steal your girl, too.
Go squat.
who cares dude, bitches aint shit. squatting, however, is important. as rippletoe says, a strong man is harder to kill and is more useful. and squatting works the quads, which triggers a central nervous system reaction that will help your body release more testosterone, which you probably need more of.
I have been waiting to see Rippetoe or Wendler come up on this sub. trp philosophy is much more easily implemented with a solid PL program under your belt. The hormonal respose to squats/DLs is undeniable, but what many guys neglect with lower body excersize is the exercises that actually make you better at sex. Want to thrust for hours without fatigue? Better add those bb hip thrusts as an accessory. How many men do you see doing multiple sets of them with 2 p8s for 10 reps? And you expect to lift a lady up when she's riding you?! Stretch those hip flexors guys.
LOL. You don't squat, you are not one of "us".
Comments like that are why my friend. Just judging by that you seem like a weird antisocial neckbeard.
Ye he’s definitely got a distorted view of the world
You’re getting downvoted, but I agree with the first statement. I hate squats and I have one of the best asses on the planet and pretty fucking solid quads and hams. Every time I squat I end up getting hurt, so it’s not even worth it. Deadlifting, on the other hand, if you don’t do that you’re shooting yourself in the foot. It’ll jack up your hamstrings, quads, lats, spinal erectors, traps, and forearms. And it’s cooler in my opinion. Squats can go to hell lol.
It's true. But squatting is good for ya.
Not sure why you got down voted. I'm a lazy ass couch sitter and know squats are definitely good for you.
Because I admitted squatting alone isn't enough to pull women. Someone got triggered by something I didn't say or agree with.
So do the most important squat and get your ass off that couch.
It must suck to be you man
This is a great fucking story.
That's exactly how you handle a situation like that.
Same goes for a job. Just replace the gf with your company/manager, and the the fun activities you wanna do but she doesn't like as the ideas you pitch but that don't get attention from upper management.
Then suddenly you decide to leave, and lo and behold, the begging starts with fake appreciation of how you're the only smartest in the team, and how you're much much more valuable than the rest of the idiots, and how they will even give you a promotion which at best is just a title-change baloney.
Definitely shouldn't put up with being treated that way. Wonder how it would have went if you had talked to her about it first before going nuclear, though probably wouldn't have made a difference.
If she treated you like that in the first place, it's already too late.
Would have gone worse. Talking about executing a threat rather than just executing it is almost always perceived as weak behavior and similar to an ultimatum which rarely goes in your favor. You are essentially telling/begging her to act better or you will leave, which she will become more repulsed by your beta behavior, because it is clear that you care enough that you want it to continue, because if you didn't, you would have just left.
This is a female reaction. She expects her mate to protect her. She expects him to display his commitment to her. A man can stand on his own and shouldn't need to hide behind his woman.
All you had to say was "No" or "Get it yourself"
Anyone could tell you how to respond in hindsight. You missed the point of the post.
learning the lesson after the fact but at least learning the lesson? no clearly that is unacceptable.
I was really just doing a reality check. I didn't actually expect her to jump in and defend me. It was more like, "so you're in on this too, huh? So I'm alone here? Ok."
I was just couldn't believe this was actually happening.
Those are the kind of memories that makes you smile, eventually - while remaining with her would have soured the trip forever in your mind. Kudos for you.
That's as redpill as it gets bud, I would not have had the spine to do that before I swallowed the pill, good on ya bud.
Have my upvote, have all of my upvotes because this...this is a great fucking story.
I hope this really is how the story ended.
I'm glad this story didn't go remotely the way I expected it to.
Here is your medal of honor, sir.
Very nice instincts. Your beautiful reaction came straight from your ancestral, innate self unadulterated by experience, interpretation, schooling or coaching. You reacted and took the right path from the first try, purely based on first principles if you will. Congratulations, great story.
Great story reminds me of all the times I should dumped my high school sweet heart, but held on too long for whatever stupid reasons. Hats off to you sir you did the apsolute right thing.
great story man love the lesson in it
True alpha behavior! Great you did that man
Good for you. Sounds like you made the right decision.
Cut the cancer out before it spreads more. People can only take so much until it's enough. It seems most people don't realize the value of someone until they are gone.
Mah man
Wanted to read it, fuck me I guess... Hate when interesting posts are removed with no explanation
Dude, that sucks the rest of your trip was a bummer afterward. Looking back, that is an amazing life lesson and kudos for sticking with your word and having self-respect. Most men would have caved, I know from experience it takes stern resolve to reject your first/LTR, even when you know the relationship is over and they keep fighting to save it, but in Europe? Well done, your life is far the better for it.
''I found myself increasingly the odd man out in their little chick clique''
You had the wrong mindset dude you should have felt amused leading those cuties around but you showed no authority so they delved you into the ground. You could have fucked your gf too she probably wanted it infact but you didn't assert dominance.
How is this subreddit this popular?
So that you can ask idiotic questions
[permanently deleted]
I just got this I'm fuckin going to bed g'night
Some people need knowledge.
Because we live in a sick society that exploits and denigrates men while holding every possible female imperative up on a pedestal. It's not that complicated really.
More mature than I is all Ill say
Do this to your fiance and take her phone and passport after getting her really wasted. See how long it takes for her to get back to America. If and when she does return, her notch count will likely be in the 100s if it isn't already. She'll fuck her way home haha.
This is why this subreddit gets a bad name
That user is in no way indicative of this subreddit.
Every time some dumbass wants to pass judgement on The Red Pill, they pick somebody who has posted in here once or twice and try to pretend that their warped perception is the general consensus within the forum.
It is not. Stop cherry-picking. If you want to judge this forum accurately, do so by weighing the merits of the sidebar and posts made by endorsed contributors or ones that have gathered more than 200 up votes.
Otherwise you are merely engaging in mental masturbation.
I'd rather have a subreddit with a bad name than an SJW hugbox
Ehhh I'm 100% with you but that's just fucked up revenge bullshit. Nobody needs that here or in their lives.
I thought it was hilarious. It's a fucking hypothetical situation. Don't be so precious.
What's even worse is that 80+ blue pilled guys took the statement seriously. Perhaps they used the same sincerity when they 'listened to Women' and provided for her and her struggling bastard spawn of a family by 'manning up' and marrying her.
Sad.
It was good, especially this part:
HAHAHAHAHHA! Thanks for that!
Holy shit, did people take this post seriously. Look at these agitated responses and the -99 rating. I took it as a joke and chuckled a little. This subreddit out of all being taken over by perma-offended SJWs would be mighty ironic.
Except you'll be in trouble by the border patrol when they catch that you have stolen someone's passport and then you'll be the one that'll have your arse fucked during prison.
Nah ditch it in the nearest garbage before heading to the airport
There is no reason to do something as stupid as that. A person's life could legitimately be in trouble if someone does takes away their passport in a foreign country.