319,516 posts

A story for the Guy who ‘can’t believe she went back to her husband/boyfriend’.

by DaveyOneBite on /r/TheRedPill
30 June 2018 11:10 AM UTC
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This was a comment I posted a while back to a guy’s situation where a cheating wife who he met at work went back to her husband but the story applies to similar situations so I figured I’d share.

It can be husband or boyfriend, meeting wherever, cheating or leaving for the Guy, going back to husband or staying with guy until cycle repeats, etc.

Girl is married to Husband. Girl knows everything about Husband. This makes Husband boring.

Girl meets Guy at work. Guy is exciting. Guy is different from Husband. Guy is new.

Most importantly, Guy is mysterious. Girl subconsciously fills in unknown parts of Guy’s life with high SMV traits. Girl gets tingles.

Girl has never loved husband. Girl starts cheating on Husband with Guy. Guy develops feelings. Guy texts, Guy calls, Guy pillow talks, Guy chats at work. Guy commits. Guy becomes less new.

Girl knows everything about Guy. Guy becomes less mysterious. Guy’s reality can’t match up to the high SMV picture in Girl’s mind.

Girl realizes Guy is not much different from Husband after all. This makes Guy boring. Guy is no longer exciting. Girl loses tingles.

Suddenly, Guy is not worth the hassle of cheating on Husband with. Girl decides to end things with Guy to ‘work on her marriage’ with Husband. Girl has always loved Husband.

Girl is a good, morally sound person for ending things with Guy, therefore she doesn’t need to tell Husband. Girl now appreciates Husband and is ready to stay faithful.

After a while, Girl meets New Guy. New Guy is exciting...

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Post Information
Title A story for the Guy who ‘can’t believe she went back to her husband/boyfriend’.
Author DaveyOneBite
Upvotes 1170
Date 30 June 2018 11:10 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit TheRedPill
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/51153
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/8v15ui/a_story_for_the_guy_who_cant_believe_she_went/
Similar Posts


235 upvotesredvelvet_oreo1 year ago

I had the odd experience of a friends girl tried hooking up with me at a lounge that her bf was at we just went for the bathroom at the same time. I turned her down. I didn’t tell her bf which I realize was a mistake now but at the time I believed the shit she said about him which most was true seen some evidence. She told him 2 weeks later. The odd thing is she told him we hooked up and of course he wanted to fight me. I did confront him. She definitely lied about me hooking up with her but he filled up his head with all these other false details. Long story short I’m not sure why she would tell the guy and lie about it since I turned her down. Wonder what the explanation could be for that.

212 upvotes • [deleted] • 1 year ago

Attention. Her being in the spotlight.

25 upvotesjay14511 year ago

Nah, she felt guilt for what she did (by guilt I mean fear of getting caught, which in girlspeak translates to guilt), and was trying to be proactive about telling her bf assuming that the dude was already going to find out.
Girls like attention but not that much.

8 upvotesLukesLikeIt1 year ago

She was worried he’d tell and wanted to paint the picture her way first. She doesn’t give a fuck

7 upvotesJampak_50001 year ago

women feeling guilt........lol

1 upvotesOrbiter451 year ago

Maybe, or maybe she was pushing the dude into a protector roll, against his will. She tried to hook him by putting out, but she didn't really need to. Whats he gonna do about it?

160 upvotesHuffnagle1 year ago

She’s a drama seeking ho. She wanted to hurt him. And... “Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned” so she was pissed at you also. Besides, how much validation is it to get 2 guys fighting over her? Lots.

Stay away from this one, that pussy ain’t worth the trouble.

48 upvotesredvelvet_oreo1 year ago

Thanks for the advice man. I cut them both out fairly quickly after that shit. They were both nuts it was sad cause I lost a good friend but he let his relationship take over his entire being. The beta in this dude was/is strong.

11 upvotesKinbaku_enthusiast1 year ago

I don't think weak people have the capacity to be very good friends; people that don't guard their own value might quickly lose it overnight by giving it to someone who isn't worth it, whether that's a scammer, an exploitative job or shit-stirring woman.

4 upvotesredvelvet_oreo1 year ago

This is spot on. He was a good friend of mine but generally I use to get annoyed with him. He would agree with me on everything even if I knew he didn’t agree. He just always tried to the super nice likeable person all the time.

Every relationship I seen him in was so cringe worthy. The guy would bend over backwards and be pussy whipped by every girl.

3 upvotes • [deleted] • 1 year ago

Girl getting two guys to fight over her? It's such a classic pattern in female psychology there's a whole description of it in Berne's psychology book "Games People Play" from the 1960's IIRC. The pattern was called 'Let's you and him fight".

15 upvotessaucierlol1 year ago

Girls nowadays do this kind of this because we let them. And honestly why the fuck would the bf want to fight the guy, its in a guys nature to go for any girl, even taken ones. But we are not savages anymore, responsibility has go be taken, she spread her legs (well not in this case but lets assume she did), she should be punished.

I dont advocate violence unto anyone but a century ago she would get a smack across the face after which she would go back on the virtuous path.

4 upvotesdialecticwizard1 year ago

Yeah. I scorned a few and I can tell ya. The fury is something else. I have never been enamoured of pussy. So always been an arrogant prick. But boy. Do you make enemies.

45 upvotesRunawayGrain1 year ago

I’m not sure why she would tell the guy and lie about it since I turned her down. Wonder what the explanation could be for that.

She didn't like getting turned down, plus the fact that her putting it out there and getting shot down would have put you in a better light than her to the bf.

She couldn't be sure you wouldn't say anything, so she got her story in first. She realized that if she got him pissed he would probably discount your version of events and possibly cut you off entirely.

12 upvotesredvelvet_oreo1 year ago

This makes perfect sense. Thank you.

35 upvotesUFO_mechanic_AMA1 year ago

Women are entitled and go mad at rejection. So she got the pleasure of drama, proving her man was protective and not indifferent, and potentially getting your ass kicked on her whim. That’s a lot of power.

9 upvotesredvelvet_oreo1 year ago

Yeah it’s crazy to think about how much shit a girl can start and you do need to watch out for the billy betas. He def struck me as the crazy type to kill someone over this chick.

12 upvotesJust_Isaak1 year ago

Exactly what the queen of Egypt did to Joseph when he didn’t wanna bang her. Bible is red pill after all.

7 upvotesdaytonbull901 year ago

One of the worst shit tests ever.

4 upvoteskyledontcare1 year ago

She wants revenge on both of them.

3 upvotesAllegro61 year ago

a similar thing happened to me. I got beat up in 1v7 by my best friend because he said:"she cried, so she must be telling the truth." So because I have no vagina and I wasn't crying my side of the story was not the correct one.

I was never the same after this shit. It's been years and I found better friends, but I'm still pissed I got beat up while being right.

4 upvotesSigmaBusiness1 year ago

It raises her "perceived" value and the BF will try to cling on to her as best as he can thinking that she has "more" choices than you would imagine.

I used to go on dates with girls who had BFs, made out with them on the first day and they would tell their BF about it knowing that their cuck beta BF won't leave whatsoever. This creates jealousy from the BF and the BF will cave in more. More power and drama for the hoe, which is what she wants. It raises her "perceived" value and the BF will try to cling on to her as best as he can thinking that she has "more" choices than you would imagine.

Girls will also try talking to other guys in front of their BF on purpose so that the BF caves in. These situations increases the one-itis in the guy.

I have also asked girls out who had BFs. I knew the girls were interested in me, but when they found out that I wasn't going to commit and I was making huge physical moves on the first date, they just clung back to their beta BFs. I am not saying I am a chad, but I do have experience where the girl will text, call, go on dates, flirt, even make out, sleep with another person to make their partner jealous, scared, and operate in scarcity mode...

106 upvotesbrownhoosierboy1 year ago

I’m an avid follower of the red pill. But the theme I’ve picked up is that no girl is loyal. Does this mean I can never have a relationship? Should I just spin plates?

180 upvotesgodofgainz1 year ago

Women do not understand loyalty the way men do. It’s not in their best interest. As long as you are their best option they can be faithful, but will stray as soon as someone better comes along, even if only temporarily. The only thing you can do is constantly improve yourself and never allow one-itis to take hold. Even if you choose to be loyal and faithful always have a backup plan... with women and life in general. Always have options... you can be sure women do... and the hotter they are the more they have. Master the game by having options yourself. And if you can’t or don’t want to, at least make them think you do. It’s the only way to win the game.

14 upvotesUncleChido1 year ago

This is the most succinct summary of trp. Keep improving. Avoid oneitis. Lift. And remember AWALT.

11 upvotesstrikethrough1231 year ago

This is the most succinct summary of the most succinct summary on TRP.

68 upvotesTheRedPillMonkey1 year ago

Hypergamy is real, but knowing that slould allow you to be better equipped to deal with it, instead of just throwing in the towel.

Essentially, keep abundance mentality, keep up your smv, and make sure you vet a girl pretty hard before LTRing her.

Lots of guys here try for the girl on the pedestal, or get married and drop their SMV, or LTR the 22yr old carousel rider, then wonder why it all went wrong. Meanwhile, there is an entire sub of TRPWomen looking to keep their N counts low and be little submissive housewives to their man and want a long, fruitful traditional marriage.

Stay on mission, keep up your smv, and vet your girl very indepthly before the LTR promotion if you want a decent relationship.

Even then, she's not yours, it's only your turn. All you can hope is that your turn is a happy one and lasts a very, very long time.

15 upvotes • [deleted] • 1 year ago

Where can you find girls irl like those on trpwomen in the west?

26 upvotespoohead31 year ago

Moving to a small rural community would be your best option, but most guys don't want to give up a comfortable life in the city just to get a "traditional" girl. Don't even waste your time looking for a good woman in a city, they don't exist.

11 upvotesImHerWonderland1 year ago

You have to lead.

I'm with a girl now that was a virgin when we met, who I'd a foreign exchange student. She was completely and utterly clueless when we first started hanging out, and I simply taught her how to behave to make me happy.

It's like raising a child to be honest.

2 upvotesThe__Tren__Train1 year ago

they are just tradthots waiting to pull the bait and switch once the providership contract has been signed

8 upvotesBurningOrangeHeaven1 year ago

What are key questions that you try to find the answers for about a potential LTR

7 upvotesTheRedPillMonkey1 year ago

The main thing is what is their main motivation to choose me over some other guy, and what are they willing to do to earn it.

They want to earn a promotion from me over someone else, why? Sure, my SMV is high, but what about my SMV are they focused on? My personality? My gym body? My dick? My bank account? My lifestyle? All the above? That leads me to know what happens if I loose that smv for some reason, and what their motivation is. A good girl cares about all of those things, they are all apart of who you are, but isn't too focused on any one of them. (Especially the bank account)

Then, and this is more important, what will she don't earn it? Will she suck my dick whenever? Keep herself tight for me? Cook, clean, etc? Will she put on sexy lingerie and cook me my favorite dinner after a long day at work? Or does shit whine, bitch, and complain about every little thing? Does she expect me to pay? Does she complain about the wrong things and expect things that she should never expect? In other words, does she think that all she has to do is show up and I am to provide everything else to make her life easy?

That's where abundance mentality come in because once you see girls exist who want to work hard to keep you happy and expect little in return, that whiney, bratty, expects you to pay for everything plate isn't as valuable as you think anymore.

I go through life thinking 100% of the girls I meet and fuck aren't LTRable. They are annoying, self-centered thots who are proud of their thotness. However, every once and awhile a girl comes along who earns a real promotion by demonstrating real value to me outside the bedroom and is willing to work hard to keep me happy and earn a position in my kingdom.

6 upvoteskittyclaw2001 year ago

They're not trying to keep the N-count low. They want to hide the N-count. There are no unicorns.

17 upvotesaskmrcia1 year ago

Does this mean I can never have a relationship? Should I just spin plates?

You can do whatever you want. Just understand that your girl will most likely cheat.

My brother is married and he honestly doesn't care if his wife cheats. If she does, then he just divorce her ass. My cousin has the same attitude.

Both have been in a relationship over 6 years.

I guess you just have to understand that you shouldn't be surprised when it happens.

23 upvotesTangoZulu1 year ago

He doesn’t care until he loses half of his shit thanks to “no fault” divorce.

17 upvotesMerwebb1 year ago

They are loyal to themselves. Be your best and someone will be loyal to the best she can snatch (you)

12 upvotesCelicni1 year ago

Don't get married.

Constantly improve yourself.

You can, and should be a little bit beta occasionally. The chick will wonder what the fuck is wrong with you if you're 5 years into the relationship and you never even told her you love her.

Never fear losing her. The moment you do, you actually will.

Have her SMV be like 2 lower than yours, so she thinks you're the best she can get.

23 upvotesdynasty_4001 year ago

No, just be aware girls are humans, and accept the relationship for what it is... if you just marry a girl you worship and think youll aitomatically live happily ever after.. chances are big youll get cucked. And ofcourse theres girls out there who sees more value in loyalty and commitment than others..

7 upvotes • [deleted] • 1 year ago

Release your thoughts of attachment,jealousy and the need to want to own someone. Cheating won't even phase you then.

5 upvotesCanuckinFL1 year ago

That's the money argument boys. It's not JUST that you need to prepare to be cheated on. Stop being weak and thinking you need a woman for anything other than precisely what and how you want things to be, and even then expect those things not to complete you.

Women will not make you happy, nor will a long term relationship, period. And if being in an LTR actually REDUCES your chances of having some kind of consistently mutual sex life, then frankly, I can't see any purpose other than really in peacocking or you've fallen in with her, which feels great, but she will leave at some point, ESPECIALLY if you really like her. Hahahahaha.

So why bother getting attached, jealous or think you can own someone. Maybe because women like stories with all those features in them? and we've heard them and bought into them?

smell the rat for what it is.

10 upvotesfacestab1 year ago

Get kids, raise them correctly and then get out.

106 upvotesLotBuilder1 year ago

During my separation pre divorce I was not ready to deal with the effort and time involved in real relationships so I dabbled with sugar dating on sites like what’s your price. I was shocked at the number of college girls with boyfriends that were getting money and dick on the side. They had no shame at all. You would hammer them at a Holiday Inn Express at 4pm and at 8pm they are posting pictures at a restaurant with their boyfriend. I liked innocent looking but sexy girl next door types. I guarantee their boyfriends had no idea what they were up to. That completely changed my view of women along with my soon to be ex wife doing the typical post separation/divorce slut fest.

30 upvotesPragmaticpandas1 year ago

Ever considered writing a post on this? I think myself and others could benefit

26 upvotesLotBuilder1 year ago

I had not but I will write one.

13 upvotestrees_away1 year ago

I could co-write it 🤣. Been seeing a chick that has sugar daddies it’s been an interesting case study.

47 upvotesLotBuilder1 year ago

I have been on seeking arrangement since 2010 with a $4500/mo budget... I was married so a lot of that budget was on hotels. I have crazy rewards at every hotel chain. I typically had a rotation of 6/7 and always prospecting for new ones. I’m a strait up bipolar sex addict that had the time and money. Not proud of it and it’s something I work on. I have had 2 dozen long terms arrangements and probably hundreds of one timers or a few times. Once you learn the game you can bang a bunch of girls without a huge budget. I’m a master of getting something with high perceived value (by a dumb 20 year old) for very little. I actually started banging two sales girls at the Micheal Kors and Bebe outlets. They saw me so often they asked what was up and I told them I was a generous friend to pretty young ladies. I also dated a front desk girl from my local Marriott because she put the pieces together and friended me on Facebook. I banged so many stupid 19-24 year old waitresses, nanny’s and junior college cheerleaders for a nice dinner and a $79 handbag, watch or dress... of course the retail tags said $300. Single moms are a different game, you may be paying for kids birthday parties

I banged everything from HS seniors that turned 18 the week before to a 48 year old college professor that was on there for thrills and it turned her husband on. Girls were anywhere on the skank factor from ex porn chicks (a few scenes, not stars) to a recently separated girl who had only been with her husband.

I have Kept in touch With several of them and the vast majority are just regular chicks that would rather fuck an old guy or two once a week than work 25-30 hours, If I were a hot girl I would probably do the same. Most have more than one SD. This isn’t like the movies where one dude gives a girl $5k a month to sleep with him a few times. I can jump on any dating app in my city and recognize 20+ girls and I’ve been with at least 5. I go onto any nightclub or big gym in my city and I’ll see a few. One of my ex girls works for a three letter government agency. Many are teachers now. Many are “Instagram models” that you see traveling all over despite being a broke 22 year old. They would panic and rush to see you on Weds/Thurs because they had a weekend music festival or concert. It’s a trip to see how “normal” they are on FB and instagram. It has pretty much ruined any chance I have at a normal dating relationship because I know that within 4 hours and $200/ max I can be balls deep in a young hardbody... and not some random cold Hooker... a girl I know and can hang out with casually. It puts you in a spot where you won’t put up with bullshit from any women because the rotation is pretty good and even with a big budget you are putting girls off to be with the one you want at that time.

5 upvotesMrAnderzon1 year ago

79$ handbag 300$ tag. Nice one. You should make this a post. Dont hide it in the comment's.

Need to make more money

5 upvotesPragmaticpandas1 year ago

Interesting as fuck. Currently in college, and I know a few girls who openly fuck with SD websites. No surprise that there's many others who keep it secret. Thanks for the post

1 upvotesSheepWaker1 year ago

How did you hide that from your wife at the time? arrangement or just deception? asking for a friend.

1 upvotesSisu69721 year ago

As a 20 year old very attractive guy. (Modeled multiple times, sub 10 percent body fat, cheekbones, jawline, blonde hair green eyes, pretty much have my pick of whoever I want, blah blah you get the point) I have been very interested in capitalizing on my looks with sugar mamas on seeking arrangements. I’m a college student in a major city in the US. I know there are way less women than men who do that, in your opinion do you think it would be worth a shot? I have a good income for my age already but would love to have my rent paid or have nice suits bought for me by a thirsty cougar

1 upvoteslenovoisshit1 year ago

Hey dude, can you elaborate on how you get discount name brand stuff? Thanks

3 upvotesPestilence19111 year ago

"Id give it up if i met the right guy"

Your competing against someone whos paying for sex, when you have to work towards it.

I hope your not putting any effort into it. Those girls are essentially like ordering a pizza on your phone.

6 upvotesalreadypiecrust1 year ago

Which sugar sites did you use? Can you share which ones were legit?

10 upvotesLotBuilder1 year ago

Seeking arrangement, what’s your price and I also send polite email inquiries through model mayhem.

1 upvotesalreadypiecrust1 year ago

Thank you!

1 upvotesalreadypiecrust1 year ago

Seeking arrangement, what’s your price and I also send polite email inquiries through model mayhem.

1 upvotesBoondockBilly1 year ago

Can you give an example of what the polite message might look like?

10 upvotesLotBuilder1 year ago

Most have their booking emails available on their profile.

Hi Ashley,

I was looking through Model Mayhem at the profile of one of my lady friends and started searching around and came across your portfolio. You are stunning and I would love to meet you... I’m hoping your personality matches up with the rest of you:). I am probably outside of your typically dating wheelhouse but I can usually bridge that gap with fun things to do, humor and generosity. Are you familiar with the concept of sugar dating? If you have any interest I would like to set up a quick, low pressure coffee date to see if we click.

Xoxo JB

  1. Subtly hint that you have other ladies that are models so you must be ok.
  2. The question about her personality takes away the begging dynamic and makes it more of a mutual interview.
  3. You don’t know her concept of generous so you keep things vague.
  4. Short, public, in person meeting with minimal talking/texting beforehand so if her personality is a dud you can bail. Not to brag but I’m a 40 year old business owner with an MBA and a IQ north of 150, There are times where I am just not going to click with a stupid 18-24 year old chick that lives at home, works retail and takes two classes at a local Junior college. There are other times where we click perfectly.
1 upvotesvirgin371 year ago

Wow, this is really good info, thanks for sharing. Have you ever thought of writing up a guide on this with tips? I'm looking to go this route to lose my virginity. Like, how much do you open up/not open up? Do you use a burner phone # or your regular one? I've read few WYP posts in some SB subreddits, and a lot are under the impression that sex isn't on the table.

EDIT: most of the girls' comments seem to think that seeking arrangement is more for sex, is that the case in your opinion?

1 upvotesBoondockBilly1 year ago

Well you've certainly found your niche, kudos to that. I second a guide should you ever decide to do one.

1 upvotesMilkMoney1111 year ago

Do you post your face on those sites? How do you do this without running in to someone you know or someone your significant other knows?

2 upvotesLotBuilder1 year ago

They have private photos. I only unlock my pick after they have checked out.

3 upvotesjonpe871 year ago

Here in Brazil this is common. Girls pay their college doing that. I came to a point in my life, I have dehumanized girls to a point... I wonder if the idiot was not me for have believed in such a thing in first place

3 upvotesLotBuilder1 year ago

I believe it. My current “GF” is from Recife. I didn’t meet her on a site but I approached her in public as I would a SB. Our first date was a 3 day weekend in Napa. Lol Brazilian women are amazing.

114 upvotesShyrk1 year ago

Girl has always loved Husband.

Oceania has always been at war with Eurasia.

1 upvotesAyrab4Trump1 year ago

I read the whole thing in Bizzaro Superman voice

21 upvotesEntropy-71 year ago

AFAIK I have only cucked one guy and I feel a bit bad about it for reasons that I will explain.

This was back in the early 90s when telephone dating started (internet dating was a decade or so away). My buddies needled me saying that only fat chicks and fuglies would use it. However, it was novel (keep that word in mind) and all sorts were trying it out.

Keep in mind, all you have is their voice and their words to figure out if you match. One of the earliest invited me over to her home, and I went. It turned out that she was an aspiring fashion model. She was too short to do runway work but she was slim, gorgeous, with big hair and a very pretty face. My only HB9, shitlords be damned.

After doing the deed on the living room floor it came out that she was married to a sailor in the Canadian Forces who was on duty for 6 months. I felt bad because I was combat engineer and I realized I had just cucked a fellow service man.

Then her 3 year old daughter walks in on us. Thankfully we were decent at that point but it got really weird.

I left as soon as I could but not before scoring one of her 8x10 head shots. I showed that pic to my friends and every one of them got on telephone dating right after.

12 upvotesViramont1 year ago

I can’t justify adultery unless the guy about to be cucked is someone I don’t fuck with.

I understand the if it’s not me, it’s someone else mentality but doing that shit is so fucking degenerate. Leaves me sick

6 upvotesEntropy-71 year ago

I didn't know she was married until it was basically a sure thing. So at that point you have on the one hand horny fashion model and on the other some moral aversion to adultery on her part not yours. I think the vast majority of guys would have followed through just the way I did.

2 upvotesMilkMoney1111 year ago

Same thing happened to me when I was in the Navy... I met a girl at a bar and we went outside down to the beach. She starts making out with me and jerking me off, then out of nowhere asks me how religious I am. I asked why and she says "Well..." and right then I immediately knew: military town, bar close to base, her asking about morals. And I said "He's on deployment isn't he?" and she said yeah. I said no, that I was in the Navy too, and it's not right. In hindsight the bitch is going to cheat anyways, whether with you or not, so I'm not sure if I regret it or not. I guess not.

118 upvotesdomable191 year ago

Soo no one's going to tell him. Think he's got a right to know lol.

131 upvotesFearGarbhArMait1 year ago

If you are fucking the wife and tell him, I promise you; your turn is over. Now, I like married women, they are good girls to strange men.

I have let a husband know and, the anger was at me because his wife could do no wrong. Apperently I owed him more loyalty than his wife did, so it is now not my problem. I don't care if they ever know.

Edit: Grammar because 2baked

62 upvotesTudorSuta1 year ago

My wife cheated on me 3 months ago and I found out by the guy calling me and telling me. While I don't consider the guy my friend by any stretch of the imagination, I still thanked him for telling me and I treat him with far more respect than I treat that whore which I am of course currently divorcing. Not every guy will react that way and every husband deserves to know.

6 upvotesSheepWaker1 year ago

No man ever told me they cheated with my ex. They thought I was a child who would lash out at them. In all honesty, if one of them would have told me. I would have respected them immensely for being a man and saying it.

3 upvotesThe__Tren__Train1 year ago


/s sorry for the bullshit you had to put up with. welcome to the desert of the real

81 upvotesphenethyljammin1 year ago

I have let a husband know and the anger was at me because his wife could do no wrong.

I've never understood this.

60 upvotes_BITCHES_LOVE_ME_1 year ago

It's very simple really. One of two people are to blame. If it's the wife then he has made a mistake and married a whore, he has to leave her and burn his marriage to the ground. Very nasty, brutal blow to the ego and it uproots your entire life. You don't want this.

But if it was the other guy's fault, the wife is a good little girl that was tricked into it by this asshole Chad... Then he can stay married and rationalize away that his wife is a cheating whore and carry on as usual. The least painful solution, if you can suppress what the wife did.

Whenever you can't figure out why people act irrationally, remember that the brain will perform whatever sort of gymnastics it needs to in order to protect your ego and cause the least amount of pain to it's owner. No matter how irrational it seems from the outside. It's always about protecting the ego. That is why women don't realize they're cheating whores either. They always have a story as to why their cheating is justified. And cheating men do too.

7 upvoteslastdumra1 year ago

This is only part of it. The other very important part is that we men compete among ourselves. When someone fucks your wife it is a sign that she thinks the other person is better than you. The manly instinct is to fight him to show, mainly to yourself but also others, that you are the better man. There is also the issue that some other men fucking your wife is a disrespect. It triggers the caveman mode basically.

I have been cheated by girlfriends, and even knowing the other guy has no obligation with me, 100% agreeing with this idea, I still have felt a strong urge to fight the other guy.

The problem is using this instinct to focus only on the other guy and don't also blame your woman. But I think hating the other guy is completely natural, despite the other guy having no obligation towards you.

1 upvoteskurdishpower011 year ago

This is also known as 'hamstering'

7 upvotes_BITCHES_LOVE_ME_1 year ago

No, it's known as rationalization. It's a well documented psychological phenomenon and not something that TRP discovered.

I mean yeah we call it hamstering but that's a pretty vague umbrella term for all irrational women-behavior on here.

72 upvotesFearGarbhArMait1 year ago

The husband was mad that I fucked his wife, he was not mad that she betrayed him. I don't understand it either. I guess it's easier to paint a stranger black.

31 upvotesphenethyljammin1 year ago

I guess it's easier to paint a stranger black.

That's definitely part of it. Scarcity mentality and sunk cost fallacy probably also contribute.

40 upvotesTwo_kids_in_a_coat1 year ago

Not exactly. He’s mad at both but has the pussy on such a pedestal and desperately knows he can’t get any better so he gives her a pass hoping that if he’s a “good understanding” husband she will fuck him again.

-21 upvotesi_bent_my_wookiee1 year ago

I guess it's easier to paint a stranger black.

Why we gotta make it about race? (lol I know, but I couldn't resist!)

17 upvotesheal_thyself1 year ago

Women are rarely held responsible for their actions, even by their own families.

I've got the family of my ex blaming me for her failed marriage. Let's ignore the fact both her parents were chronic cheaters, the girl and her husband were both pieces of shit, the mom knew, little sister knew, half her friends knew, and she came over on the regular on her own volition. It's all my fault. Fucking bullshit.

3 upvotesSheepWaker1 year ago

That's not on you. Just ignore them and scratch it up as she's an idiot.

2 upvotesheal_thyself1 year ago

I'll take some responsibility. I knew, no questions about it. But for the full blame, fuck that and fuck them.

I've channeled my anger into a slow burning fire inside and using it for an extra boost at the gym right now.

8 upvoteswashington_breadstix1 year ago

The husband doesn't want to face the fact that he married a whore.

7 upvotesihnrva1 year ago

The simplest answer... Occam's Whore.

9 upvotesHostlessPotato1 year ago

Probably due to cognitive dissonance. He thinks she would never cheat on him, therefore placing the blame on the other person keeps his world view safe. "My wife is loyal therefore its your fault" (read: I couldn't possibly take the pain that this knowledge implies therefore I will keep my ego safe by blaming it on you)

2 upvotes2012Aceman1 year ago

He can vent his frustration and anger on someone he cares nothing for and has no responsibility toward (you). If he were to vent that same frustration and anger on his wife he'd lose everything because she can use that as ammo. From his point of view without you introducing yourself into his environment his life would have continued going according to plan, and now it can't, and you've ruined the past, present, and future of his relationship.

12 upvotesTheDevilsAdvokaat1 year ago

Sad but not the first time I've heard this. I've heard of people being thanked; I've also heard of people being attacked because the husband insists it's impossible so it must be a slur on his wife...

21 upvotesGodEmperorofMankindd1 year ago

I don’t mess with married women. You’re playing roulette when a blue pilled hubby going to come after your ass rather his woman.

7 upvotesaugustwes1 year ago

Twice I was in the “grey area” with ladies.One, who actually was separated from said husband, ended with a Haitian voodoo curse supposedly being placed on me. Lol...no, nothing happened, curse-wise. The second was a gal who said she was “going to leave her unhappy marriage”. This one ended with very lengthy, very uncomfortable conversations with hubby regarding what a piece of shit I was “for ruining his marriage”. I tried to explain to the poor dude that his marriage was shit long before I came along. Nope. Wouldn’t hear it. Bizarre.

7 upvotesYoungManHHF1 year ago

Lmao can imagine already "oh hey guy who my wife slept with I put a curse on u btw, ok bye"

12 upvotesTheDevilsAdvokaat1 year ago

I agree. I don't do it either because I think it's morally wrong.

1 upvotesRespectThis1 year ago

I'm single, I've made no contract with anyone. Where is there moral dillema in such a scenario? She was gonna cheat whether I was the one or it was the next candidate she approved of. With that said I don't make it a point to actively pursue married women but I recently "found" myself in a thing with one

It came about by doing some work for her. I'd be lying though if I said I didn't know from our first conversation that this chick was showing all the signals hard on social media.

Her husband caught her cause she probably wanted to be, but when the threats came my way I just gave it to him straight. If I was really lacking morals, I'd of had him revoked, but that's a genuine bitch move.

8 upvoteswhuttupfoo1 year ago

Why anyone would confess to a husband like it's their duty is beyond me. That's risky, you don't know if a beta male will kill you or not. There is no point in telling a husband, you aren't saving the world doing this, you're just potentially risking your life.

7 upvoteskittyclaw2001 year ago

The wife could also get pissed too and hit you with a rape accusation.

That could happen anyway for any number of reasons. They don;t call them fucking hamsters for nothing.

You bed married chicks, your playing russian roulette.

2 upvotes • [deleted] • 1 year ago

The girl comes out to number 2 as far as guilt goes, at best, in this equation. More often number 3 as the husband blames the other guy, then blames himself, and finally her if he ever does.

1 upvotes • [deleted] • 1 year ago

I would still tell them, but i wont expect "thanks for fucking my wife either"... Idiot... But id do it cause if i was bp in ltr i would want to know so i can next...

-11 upvotesMe_ADC_Me_SMASH1 year ago

Why would you care what another man thinks?

16 upvotes • [deleted] • 1 year ago

When he has 12g at ur dome you can care a little i guess

1 upvotesRespectThis1 year ago

If I'm up to no good, I'm definitely equipped with my slip-proof buff. Cause the one that really will have no qualms with snuffing you out isn't gonna tell you as much. That one that makes threats is harmless.

5 upvotes • [deleted] • 1 year ago

Even killer whales play with their food...

34 upvotesWolfgang9851 year ago

These cheating wife/fiance/ltr situations some guys find themselves in have always intrigued me.

I fell for the trap the first time it happened to me. The experience went from feeling like a champ, to a little bitch in all of one month. Holy shit, was that both a humbling and enlightening experience for me.

Fast forward several years now, and I now always handle these situations with indifference. There have been many occasions where I didn't find out about the husband/fiance/ltr until after hooking up with the girl. Most of these I end immediately. Some are understood as a week fling that start and end in that time frame. Hell, I've had one night stands where these types of girls just want to be fucked in the back of a car in a parking lot and never talk to you again.

Regardless, the expectation of a cheating women leaving the other guy for you should never be taken into consideration for numerous reasons. Further, I find nothing to gain about being the "white knight" and telling the guy. If you want to leave some anonymous note or some shit, go ahead. Otherwise, use that situation as a learning experience.

19 upvotesretteh1 year ago

Does anyone expect anything different? A cheating husband would typically do the same thing. Cheating is typically about sex and excitement for both genders with women doing it for slightly more emotional reasons on average. Expecting a real relationship to bloom out of an affair is like expecting to stick you hand in shit and find a gem -- it's certainly possible but you should set realistic expectations.

23 upvotesIntrovertedMagma1 year ago

Iol awesome writing style.. Keep making posts bro

7 upvotesCaptZ1 year ago

Girl most likely has borderline personality disorder.

As an aside, if she cheats on husband with you, she'll cheat on you too with someone else eventually. You're no more special than her husband.

5 upvotesU-941 year ago

Heh! I've been in this situation. I can almost hear that Beauty and the Beast song reading this, "It's a tale as old as time...."

Still would rather be dude getting used in the affair than the husband though.

5 upvotesihnrva1 year ago

I was the New Guy in this example. This fits it to the T. Good post, OP.

Just always remember, she's not yours, it's just your time.

7 upvotesViramont1 year ago

Fucken LOL Being awaken to this shit is like chugging bleach. Why can’t it be like the movies Bros...

8 upvotesdingleburry_joe1 year ago

Red pills were never meant to be easy to swallow. Morpheus said it wasnt goingnto be easy

1 upvotesnotadaddy1 year ago

watch the movie Swingers. Red pill truths from the beginning to the very end.

1 upvotesrushIsVarietyBitch1 year ago

as red as the blood from Gretzkys head

7 upvotesWholesomeAwesome1 year ago

... Girl has never loved husband.

11 upvotesplentyoffishes1 year ago

This happened to a female friend, husband was cheating with her and she was convinced he was going to break off the marriage, but in the end, he stayed with the wife. I don't know why this was surprising to my friend.

18 upvotespuredemo1 year ago

Most women are shocked when they can't get what they want.

4 upvotesXCommunistX1 year ago

Hello everyone, i’m really young and new here. This might be a stupid question but is there any way to break this cycle?

14 upvotesjuju5151 year ago

if "husband" never gets boring... it's possible...

if "husbands" SMV is always higher than some random "new guys"... it's possible...

but that's not actually "breaking the cycle" as you said... it's just keeping the cycle stuck at your side... xD

other than that it's impossible... hypergamy is real...

1 upvotesXCommunistX1 year ago

But doesn't a husband with high SMV will attract a lot of sexual partners, which as a result can be unloyal to his wife and then cheat on her? Does that make him the same with the girl in the story of OP too? P/s: sorry everyone I am just being curious.

8 upvotesilikecakemor1 year ago

This either happens or it doesnt. You said you are young. Don't go into relationships expecting things to go sour. It is more likely people fall out of love when they are holding back. Sure, it is risky to put it all out there and give them all you've got, but if it works out, it is so damn worth it.

This can be a cycle for some people, in this case you just need to distance yourself from these specific people, they aren't worth your time. Most people aren't that low.

4 upvotesPragmaticpandas1 year ago

Wow, perfectly and succinctly written. I've seen this exact scenario play out in my own life and in other's. I think just realizing the truth behind this should be enough to unplug someone.

4 upvotes • [deleted] • 1 year ago

Odd enough this is true OP.

My child's mother parades her new man & his family in family court. I laugh when they keep hamstering in their group how he is a "good guy" and "nice" yet every single time she is always checking me out in front of him, tried adding me on social media midst of the battle, and so forth. I didn't bite any of her bait and I can tell it drives her crazy that I moved on to which she cannot have me easily.

Women are just interesting creatures.

5 upvotesdingleburry_joe1 year ago

The sad thing is that this points out the idea of how women are based "in the moment" and on feels. Imo When i look at this loop i see that even the young fresh guy was no different deep down, its just the fact that it was something new. Its the essence of hypergamy.

Mystery involves the unknown and thats all. Not every man is sime james bond chsracter, but some men have it better than others. Hence why the mission and goals are sbove women because we also csn have options. Women will cave if you give power to them. Always focus on being more aloha and developing frame.

4 upvotesbakachelera1 year ago

This makes me go all anxious. So there is no way to avoid being cheated on after all, right? the real solution is to either choose very well your wife or not to marry at all, Am I missing something?

4 upvotesSergeantDodo1 year ago

The anxiety is natural; men have been conditioned to apprehend cuckholdery intensely (it has to do with ensuring paternity). Women apprehend in their own way (they don't want to share or risk sharing their acquired resource (you)).

It is not that there is no way to avoid being cheated on; it is that it cannot be guaranteed and hence do not expect it. Focus on yourself, not your partner. No matter what happens, do not condone someone cheating on you; end it at any cost (this cost is nowhere near what you have to pay if you 'forgive' them).

The way I think of it by now is: ALWAYS be ready to leave. (Truth is, women feel it and for some odd reason I'm sure someone here can explain, are less likely to cheat then)

4 upvotesLotBuilder1 year ago

Date, gift, a weekend trip somewhere nice that I want to go to anyway with a hottie. About that time they start asking about money and I flip it and indignantly say that would be like prostitution and I don’t do that. “I buy you nice things and take you nice places but just handing you money feels hookerish.” At that point they ghost or stick around, I don’t really care either way because I have a few newbies getting warmed up for the same thing.

1 upvotesdee3281 year ago

Do you have any specific line drawn on what constitute gift? Like girls come ask you to pay their rent and stuffs like that. Have you gotten any girls that just took the gift and wasn't down to fuck, aka they walk away with the gift?

Is there any options besides outlet mall for guys who want to play this? The nearest outlet mall for me is like 40.7 km away. Dude you should write a post, learning a lot of stuffs.

1 upvotesLotBuilder1 year ago

You have all sorts of shit happen and it is all part of the game. My approach doesn’t appeal to the semi pros that are paying their rent on their back. I end up with naive newly single moms and college girls that don’t have much to compare it to it terms of real dating. They are pretty easy to impress.

5 upvotespbar1 year ago

Of my half-dozen best friends over the years, every single one of their wives has gone through a spell of really giving it off in my direction. With two in particular, I had a long, simmering, and very enjoyable flirtation for many years. I never got nekkid with either one of then, but they gave off strong obvious sex rays in my direction, enough that it became a bit of a thing with my friends, their husbands.

I'm not quite ready to admit that it had nothing to do with my own charm and vibe, but I've always known it had a lot more to do with them being married to the other guy and not me.

And when I got married, I got to see that whole thing from the other side. It's not nearly so hilarious from that angle.

11 upvotessulfonylurea1 year ago

Who’s to say Guy doesn’t have Wife at home, who’s beautiful and loyal? Guy gets attention from Girl at work. Girl is alright, perhaps not as hot as wife, still, new and therefore more attractive. Girl loses interest for reasons mentioned in the story, Guy realizes Girl is a cheating, fickle bitch, Wife was always there for him, goes back to Wife with a clear conscience to ‘work on the marriage’. You all know this is as plausible as the original story. Men stray just as much, if not more, than women. Loyalty and commitment and permanence of relationships is just not valued enough in the culture; that’s what needs to be fixed.

1 upvotesAlmightyPerun1 year ago

That's not the point of the sub. Women are far more likely to do that, as most non-RP men, which is most men, live in an idealized world of white knightdom. They all became lazy fucks either incapable of or unwilling to cheat. There's no reason to cheat on an angel, it just goes against their personality.

Simply put, men and women behave completely differently. A man can be perfectly content with a single woman untill death. Men also value morals and the concepts of honor and loyalty, unlike women who see it as "silly man things", and are constantly searching for a better partner (subconsciously).

And, what makes things worse is the society/culture (as you've said). Women are applauded for it, due to the entire "strong and independent wahmyn" narrative. Men are villified for it. Divorcing a mother makes you worse than Hitler regardless of circumstances, while divorce-raping a husband makes her "strong and independent" regardless of circumstances.

3 upvotesSergeantDodo1 year ago

With that mentality, you should cheat before/after/while/if/regardless whether she cheats. I don't see women as 'angels' (anymore) after going through my own life but I live by the saying 'don't do to others what you wouldn't like done to you'. My point is don't go along cheating just in case your wife does so.

Do go ahead and build yourself up so that regardless of whether she's your hoe or everyone's hoe, you got your options sorted.

6 upvotes • [deleted] • 1 year ago

I agree, I think its the society that allows this behaviour to fluorish. Because before this was not a problem or as large of one before the sexual revolution along with feminism coming about.

4 upvotesjeromeantoinecarter1 year ago

If a man cheats, he is most likely just having sex.

If a woman cheats, she is most likely falling in "love" (what her mind will rationalize it as).

6 upvotes • [deleted] • 1 year ago

Good read. It's practically a flowchart at this point.

3 upvotesAndgelyo1 year ago

Nice, simple laymen terms and story, but extremely effective. Bravo for a quality post.

1 upvotes7a7p1 year ago

You have the link to the original post you pulled your comment from?

1 upvotesIMMRPHANTOM1 year ago

Can someone tell me SMV meaning please?

2 upvotesDoggieTreats1 year ago

Sexual Market Value...There's a Glossary on the main page on the right side, check it out!

1 upvotesIMMRPHANTOM1 year ago

Thanks I appreciate it! I thinkbof it as standard minute value! I’ll check it on laptop later

1 upvotesNikolaGeorgiev1 year ago

That was really funny to read, thanks, mate.

1 upvotesPastelitomaracucho1 year ago

Did not you read the paper posted here about two weeks ago? Go find your answers there.

The girl is simply in an unhappy relationship and she is in the process of branch swining, testing prospects. Simple as that.

1 upvotesimtheoneimmortal1 year ago

this work only in marriage or also ltr?

1 upvotesneurot0x1c1 year ago

Add this to your post

Tldr; Women suck yada yada yada. Ad nauseam.

14 upvotesEuropeanAmerican4201 year ago

Why do you think that? Please explain yourself

10 upvotesUFO_mechanic_AMA1 year ago

Lol, I think his post history will give you a more complete answer. It’s mostly about using hard drugs, he posts to blue pill, and apparently has some kind of hatred for men who aren’t circumcised (?)

8 upvotesEuropeanAmerican4201 year ago

he seems to have hatred for everything. That was an exhausting read

1 upvotesneurot0x1c1 year ago

This subreddit has become redundant. I have yet to see something original.

1 upvotesfrontiermarine1 year ago

then you can leave, problem solved.

0 upvotes • [deleted] • 1 year ago

Where else will I laugh at guys suffering from PTSD who have been bitch slapped into coming here by some Barbie doll?

1 upvotesWhatdoin271 year ago

Don't say you haven't. Guys like you are so easy to read.

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