New to TRP: Caught Wife with Another Woman

Hello Everyone,

I've been following this subreddit, and overall Red Pill philosophy for a few months now. I recently bought Athol Kay's MAP Primer.

I've created account today for the community's advice. I'm a 33 male with a 33 old wife. Married 9 years, together 14 with 2 kids.

This past weekend I caught my wife making out with another woman. The woman is a "consultant" who came to our home the weekend after spending a few days with my wife at work. She's from across the country and while I know they've communicated before her arrival I'm fairly confident they have never met before the incident.

Anyway, this woman came over, along with another woman my wife works with and they all started drinking. I left for a few hours to play poker and when I came back (around 11pm) my wife was drunk and the other women were tipsy. They were outside at our fire pit. I stay with them until about 12:30 then I go to bed. Not long after I go to bed the woman who my wife works leaves as well, leaving my wife alone with this "consultant."

For some reason I had a bad feeling in my stomach so even though it made me feel ridiculous I camped out at a window overlooking the firepit and watched my wife with this other woman (the consultant). My wife eventually began touching her neck, sitting very close to her, and putting her hand high on her thigh. I managed to open a window a little so I could listen, but could only make out parts of the conversation. At one point I hear my wife say to her "I promise I won't hurt you." After about 20 minutes of sitting incredibly close, and touching in very friendly ways, I see them kiss.

A few minutes after they kiss, I see them get up and head to the back part of the yard (away from the house). Since I could no longer see them from the window I snuck outside and heard them giggling and whispering quietly. After spending a few minutes driving myself crazy (wondering exactly what was going on) I finally go out to find both of them laying down with my wife practically laying on top of this woman and looking like she is going to kiss her.

I pull her off the woman and demand to know what is going on. They are both clearly VERY intoxicated. They lie and say they were just cuddling. I asked if anything physical happened and of course they say no. They only admit to kissing after I told them what I saw. Of course I'm angry and yelling. Meanwhile this other woman is telling me to sit down and calm down on my own property. I tell her to leave and since she's too drunk to drive that I'll take her back to the hotel. They both tell me that she is not comfortable with me at the moment and won’t ride with me. I tell my wife I need to talk with her about the incident right then and that she should ask the woman to leave. She doesn't.

After that I packed my kids up and took them to my fathers (at 3 am). It took 40 minutes for my wife to realize what happened but what followed was a series of phones between my wife and I were she was yelling at me and calling me ridiculous for taking the kids.

Eventually I came home later that morning (around 7) and had a 6 hour conversation with my wife. She said she was just drunk and eventually admitted to kissing the woman several times. She insisted that nothing else happened. I was skeptical and asked several challenging/cyncial questions.

She basically she said was curious (even though this isn't the first time she's kissed another woman). I told her my problem wasn't that she kissed another woman, my problem was that she did it behind my back. She's gotten drunk and made out with women before and I've always been OK with because I've been there and knew about. I told her that had she come to me and said she was attracted to this other woman I would have been fine. It was the dishonesty and deceit I couldn't tolerate.

She eventually provided answers that satisfied about 98% of my curiosity, although I did feel like she was trickle-truthing me at times. We had some of the best sex of our marriage with her giving me full access to everything from blow jobs to anal. I had as much sex as I wanted, however I wanted it. She's even been making more meals, doing more with the children and around the house. It SEEMS like she's genuinely sorry.

Things were great for those few days, until on Monday night I caught her trying to delete a phone call. She accidentally deleted the whole call log (I've been following red pill advice and monitoring closely) and didn't admit to it until I told her I saw it happen (over her shoulder and through the window). She then says that she called the consultant to make sure the issue wouldn't affect her work. She said she had been concerned about the professional repercussions to the incident and she wanted to make it perfectly clear that the relationship needs to stay professional (she has to continue working with her, no choice really).

I was pissed, because she lied again. I told her it would have been fine had I been there when she called, but that the whole thing felt deceptive. She promised me that it was only a 2 - 3 minute phone call, and the only significant interaction with her.

I later checked the phone records and found out the call was 20 minutes not 2. She said that they really didn't talk that much, and promised that the conversation happened as she related it.

In short, I caught in her another lie. It seems like a small lie, but I don’t really know. Again, she’s been incredibly apologetic, has fucked me more in the last 5 days than in the last 5 weeks, and is basically giving me whatever I want.

I’ve been following the mate guarding advice, and I’m heavily monitoring all of her communications. I've been full on alpha since the event. So my question for the community is this –

Should bisexual/lesbian infidelity be treated differently than classic infidelity?

How does a bisexual encounter factor into hypergamy?

I’m pissed about the lying (of course) but I can’t figure out if this is a case of her wanting to explore with another woman, or if I’ve been too beta. As I said, I’m still new to TRP. I’m just trying to navigate my way through this.

I know my post is long, so thanks for taking the time to read it.