Summary: OP wants his girlfriend to wear thongs for him but she refuses. White knights excoriate him for even daring to ask her, because apparently that's misogyny.
Full thread here.
Every goddamned subreddit on this website is chock full of feminists, proud card-carrying beta males, and white knights. And to prove it, here's another story of a sad guy whose girlfriend isn't even attracted enough to wear a thong for him at home - even though she wears one at work. Yes, you heard that right. She has no problem wearing it everywhere else, but for him... eh.... her vagina is just too dry to entertain the thought.
So instead of manning up, he tries to barter and reason his way to attraction. But as we at TRP know, you can't negotiate attraction.
She is quite a piece of work when it comes to sexuality, but that is not really much of a problem, as long as I know that we are making progress.
We often talk about her underwear and I asked her multiple times already to wear something more sexy for me, but she doesn't see any reason to it
I know that she is already a bit annoyed if I start talking about that, but I dont really want to give up that easily. I told her I am willing to make compromises, for example It doesn't have to be every single time we get intimate or that I would gladly pay half of it if she would buy some new underwear to wear for me.
Yeah, if you cringed in embarrassment after reading this, congrats: you're a normal person who can see what a supplicating dude he is. Trying to get her to wear thongs by sitting her down and discussing the case as if they are in a courtroom... buddy, if she's attracted to you, she'll do it. If she's not, she won't.
The more interesting thing in this story is the utter hateful reaction he gets from the commenters. Apparently it's not enough to be respectful - you're still a misogynist if you even ask your girlfriend to do something sexy for you! The goalposts have officially been moved, gentlemen. Male desires are unacceptable now. Read on...
I suggest that you have a real conversation about with her, ask questions about her point of view. Help her understand why it matters to you. Explain what foreplay with sexy underwear would actually be like. Talk about it instead of just ask for it.
"Talking to her about it didn't work, so try talking to her some more."
I don't think this is an issue with thongs themselves, but rather that your girlfriend doesn't see thongs as lingerie. She sees them as a regular clothing item and it doesn't make any sense to her to put one on for sex if it's just normal underwear to her.
Solipsism. "As a female, I don't see how thongs are sexy. So why does my boyfriend? Weird." It doesn't even occur to maybe do something selflessly for her boyfriend; but then again, females generally aren't selfless in relationships. It's always take take take.
Since you know she doesn't want to wear them, are you even going to be able to enjoy seeing her in a thong when you know she's not enjoying herself? For me that would be a mood killer.
Classic strategy of turning the tables on OP instead of, y'know, addressing the problem.
How often do you bring this up with her? I hope it's not more than several months apart, because that really gets annoying and naggy. Girls already have to spend a lot of time grooming, choosing clothes, putting on makeup, shaving themselves, because society expects it and will imply that you're GROSS and unacceptable unless you are baby-smooth. Women already get judged constantly on their appearance. To come home from work and be ready to be intimate with your partner that's supposed to be your safe haven from bullshit, and then have him say that sex isn't good enough, you need to be wearing some lacy thing because it pleases HIM is not going to be something that feels good.
"Once every 6 months you may ask me to be sexy for you, but no more, or else you're creepy."
Just to give you a different perspective, I am a woman who personally feels that lingerie is a pretty sexist, as there just isn't a male version of it.
The cherry on the shit cake. LOL is all I have to say about this.
TL;DR: Attraction can't be negotiated. And even if you try and are "nice and respectful" about it, beta society will shame you anyway because they hate male sexuality.
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