Lesson: If you lose frame in front of a woman, she will forever use this against you as a tactic to benefit herself (AWALT) while making you look bad. Keep frame, stay strong, and brush it off because you know you're awesome.

The backstory: In college I was in a fraternity and was a serial monogamist that everyone knew as "the pretty boy." I would go through cycles of RP/BP unknowingly because I carried an IDGAF attitude with me during my time single. It's no wonder I was able to get a girlfriend so quickly and lose them so quickly, because there was a disconnect in my behavior from single life to relationship. I hadn't reached the epiphany phase throughout all that because I was so conditioned to look for "love" and blue pill based happily ever afters that it took one "special" person and one special moment to help me get to that stage.

EDIT: I know that this story contains a whole series of broken frame and is a prime example of beta behavior that led to my own downfall. I'm talking about one particular instance among the mountains of instances where I broke frame so badly that my ex used it in a public article as a character assassination attempt*

Fast forward to post college life, when I moved to the big city with my girlfriend at the time, and over time, she grew increasingly unhappy as I worked 6 days a week from anything to 10+ hours a day. Sunday was my only day with her and she was growing tired of it. She broke up with me and I had hit rock bottom at that point. With no actual friends in the big city (we only hung out with hers), my job that paid me too little for too much work, and paying a ton of money for an apartment I couldn't afford, I was SOL. Now, this girl I knew throughout college had taken notice of me and tried to flirt with me for three years while I was an undergrad, but I took no notice of her until I hit rock bottom in the same city she was living in. I was in full gear to go back to picking up and slaying the field, but she got to me first and we entered an FWB. This girl is the worst kind of girl you can meet. Although you think AWALT and know it to be true, she was the most Hyper-feminist social justice warrior-esque, solipsistic, hypergamous, and CC riding veteran you would ever meet (AKA she was/is the dark triad of AWALT). Back then, I felt special to be chosen by her because she was a semi successful blogging college student who was internet famous for her college talks about feminism/ race politics. Because I was in such a low point, it was easy for me to give up my frame and adopt a blue pillish attitude towards her and she played me like the fool that I was.

She locked me into an LTR by making herself scarce and saying " u/Seoul_Brother, if only I met you later in life. I just broke up with my ex and wanted to experience traveling and meeting new people, etc,etc". She was about to go out of the city to visit her friends on the opposite coast and that's when I asked her to be be my girlfriend and "lock her in."

From that point I will name you the key red flags that I noticed, but CHOSE to ignore like a fool:

  1. Talked about the concept of open relationships (and how she's a proponent), and asked me what I viewed about cheating (while she subsequently said "I would NEVER cheat on anyone!").

  2. Told me about her time as a sugar baby and how it's a great way for women to get ahead and subvert the patriarchy.

  3. Continually belittled me in front of my friends to the point my friends actually had to have an intervention with me about her.

  4. Dealt with her bullshit and emotional cheating on me with her ex and whatever other guy that happened find her fancy. She gas-lighted me to the point where I believed it didn't happen. (This one took a while to realize).

Let's go forward to the timeline near the collapse of the relationship:

We were living together, I was doing all the household chores while she basically did nothing in the house. I helped/supported her in finding a new job, went with her to universities where I did talks about masculinity (ergo her teachings), and misled generations of students on how to "be a man." I was cucked into submission so hard by this girl that I thought it was normal. Fuck me and my past life haha.

It's closing near Valentine's day and she asks for a break. She makes up some excuse that since we started dating, she never actually got to experience the dating app culture (while I had), and said it was unfair. We went over an agreement about the break and we took sex off the table. We gave ourselves a couple weeks to do this and when we came back, it seemed like we were happier than ever. I bought her a expensive bag, and took her out to Valentines dinner and the night was good. However the next day she confessed to me about basically having a sexcapade with her coworker during this whole break and that the agreement for a break was a cover so she could do this. I literally had to fish a straight answer out of her. She basically held out for free shit and Valentine's Day feelz before throwing in the bad news like an "oh by the way..."

Here is where I broke my frame so hard that it would come back to try and haunt me. I got mad... I mean I got livid. I broke this really old, rained on furniture and yelled at her and within the thrashing, I turned towards her (still several meters away), and punched a piece of metal above me, but in truth I saw nothing but what a pathetic person I had become (this is an important part to remember) and just happened to be looking in her direction. I realized I had been the biggest BP cuck for a year and half, basically becoming a slave to this girl and wasting my time. Note, that I never would and never have hit a woman in my life (unless she asked me to do so during sex), and I still stand as a non-abuser.

She cried and begged me for another chance and I apologized for my disruption because we were living together and because I didn't want her to go nuclear on me. At that moment I knew I had to play along because I didn't know what else she was capable of. She even cut herself while I was at work because she said she felt so guilty of what she had done, further proving to me that this girl was not stable. I let her believe she could "win me back" and nodded my head at whatever she said (STFU), but I distanced myself and prepared for my new life. I hooked up with other girls after work, I started to get my life back on track by using that anger phase to lift harder than ever, and I hung out with my friends and family more. She moved out to another apartment after a month and some change, and I gave it a couple more weeks because she purposefully left some of her things and would try to contact me constantly to try to have a hook in me. I was such an emotional pillow cuck to her that she thought she could come back to me any time. Meanwhile, I was going on Tinder dates, smashing chicks left and right, and reading TRP religiously (something she despised and hated with a passion). Funny thing is, when you look at the types of guys she was flirting with and trying to cheat on me with, they had characteristics of TRP men. She was initially attracted to me because she knew single me was unknowingly TRP. I realized this. I owned it, and I was enjoying single life, building up my group of guy friends, and had a support network. She must have noticed that I was going back to basics (when she was first attracted to me), because she kept trying to message me and have a conversation/come over. I made excuses like "I am busy today," and "not today, I got a guest coming over," and continued to evade her seeing me again because I wanted to play myself as scarce to her, make her want me again, then shut her out completely as a final blow.

Two weeks went by and I officially told her that I was done and I don't want her contacting me any more because she is shady and I don't associate myself with shady characters. I blocked her on all social media outlets after this point. This test case was the biggest example of "ignore what she says, watch what she does," I have ever experienced in my life. Her hamster was doing 0-60 in no time flat and she found herself on both sides of the spectrum (hamstering to cheat on me with her coworker and hamstering to try to actually keep me) within a month. Living with an ex girlfriend that cheated on me and seeing the hamster in action was the best and worst thing to ever happen to me because I got to see firsthand the nature of AWALT.

Word got around about her infidelity and most of her friends and my friends shunned her for what she did. Even her super feminist friends (who were very supportive and good people), came to me and hung out with me, saying mean things about her and how she's "an opportunistic person."

I took my time to work out, start meal prepping for myself, saving money, and going out/ generally having a good time for myself. I read the sidebar, started applying that to my life and go to the point where I am today. I'm a better man and was able to finally understand why I was able to pull so hard when I was single and why I kept getting broken up with once in a relationship.

All this while, my friends would send me screen shots of her twitter or Facebook posts where she would mention something about abusers and the psychology of abuse (hinting at me). I didn't think anything of it and lived my life. I wasn't going to waste time on her and she became nothing but a distant memory. Mad props to my friends and their loyalty to me. That respect is earned, not expected.

Fast forward to now. She wrote an article about her experience with me, conveniently leaving out the finer details that make her look like a bad person and that I horrified her (with my BP tantrum). This article was all about "Feelz B4 Realz," and called for awareness of domestic abuse within relationships. I wake up to texts from multiple friends bad mouthing her and links to her article that she made public. She was trying to kill my reputation, painting me as a future wife beating abuser, using her former leverage as a feminist figure with her click-bait article to try and become relevant again. She was literally stretching the truth so hard to fit her own personal narrative that she wrote about how she FELT like I was going to hit her, when I didn't.

Without needing to even read the article at the time, I immediately posted a status on my own wall telling people to not interact with the post and let it be, because my friends and family all knew the truth already and that's all that mattered. It was an article trying to slander me, written by a bored girl who needed to validate herself and pull herself out of being a social pariah. I'm sure if she had the grounds to do so, she would have thrown a rape accusation in there too. I wouldn't have been surprised. And yet, I still felt bad for her because this was just proof that she was grasping at straws for attention and validation.

People from all corners reached out to me throughout the day (because they knew it was about me), asking for my opinion and I told them a succinct version of what happened from my perspective, that she is now trying to paint me as something I am not, and that they can choose to believe me or not because I just didn't care. What's funny is, these people are mutual acquaintances, and they seemed to take my side as it was more rational sounding than the article.

Some of my friends ignored my request to stay quiet, and commented on her post, calling her out for having been emotionally abusive towards me throughout the whole relationship and that she was basically writing an article about how much I did not actually hit her and that she was pulling things out of thin air to make her point. They sent me screenshots I didn't ask for and how she deleted the comments and blocked them on social media. It was nice to know that I had basically become untouchable. My ex wanted to get a rise out of me I'm sure because I had noticed I was not blocked from seeing it when I finally got around to reading the article off her profile. I knew she was waiting for me to comment something hateful back, lose my frame and prove to her femme-nazi circle jerk party that I was an abusive person, and I wasn't going to give her the pleasure of twisting it. I chuckled at myself because it had reached a point so pathetic that I didn't want to even associate with it. In fact, I feel pity for her to stoop so low as to pull character assassination attempt on me.

It was near the end of the night and about 20 people asked me if I was okay and if the article's claims were true. I offered the same short version of my side of the story and told them I wasn't going to stoop to that kind of level since I know I'm not the person she paints me as. Even her current friends reached out to me saying they lost respect for her actions for going public with such a private matter and that we should hang out sometime.

I told my now LTR about it, joked about how ridiculous and childish it was, went on with a nice, normal day (minus me responding to people), and had crazy monkey sex (because passive dread for ex gf trying to make herself relevant in my life) to end the night. I played all the right cards and held frame like a motherfucker when several months ago, I would have broken down and created an argument because I would have taken it as her besmirching my name. I look sexier than ever due to lifting again, I'm working hard to switch careers by studying more on my own time, and have a close group of brothers and sisters in the city that would fall on a sword to defend my honest name. It is me time all the time now, and I wouldn't trade it for the world.

This was the first time I saw IDGAF through a test case rather than passively in practice. I merely responded to these people because they wanted to genuinely hear my perspective, I got to see how far I had come in maturity, and I saw firsthand how effective having a strong, unwavering frame really is.

Be a rock and no one can hurt you. I'm thankful for having such a great support network at home and TRP to guide the way. I used to bash this place as a bluepill cuck, but when you read past the shitposts and get to the root of TRP's vision and mantra for men, it's all about self improvement and becoming a stronger, better version of yourself. One must be a massive BP shit head before coming to TRP on your own terms to understand what it means to be RP and what values it actually represents.

TL;DR: Ex wrote a slanderous article about me by trying to make me look like some future wife beating abuser because I broke frame (and some old furniture) when she admitted to cheating on me way back when. I held frame, told my friends to not speak on my behalf, went on with my life and had good sex to close the night out. Be awesome, lift harder, game the field better, and never enter a woman's frame when she tries to use past transgressions against you.