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[–]MichaelSkarn_FBI183 points184 points185 points 4 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link
Just say sorry when ... you’re sorry.
But an actual apology is not saying”I’m sorry.” It’s changing your behavior.
[–]OnlyHanzo64 points65 points66 points 4 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
In russian language there are two ways to say sorry. One means "i realize that i fucked up", the other one is "i want you to forgive me".
You can guess which one carries more meaning and which one people generally use.
[–]Inverclacky20 points21 points22 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
To me saying "I want you to forgive me" is like saying "I want you to let it go". But saying "I realise I fucked up" means "I take full responsibility for what I did wrong".
[–]jimmy_eat_womb3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
hm, i dont know, could go either way i guess, but if forced to speculate, i would say that 'i want you to forgive me' is weightier and used with more restraint, and 'i fucked up' is the one used frequently. is that right?
[–]OnlyHanzo10 points11 points12 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The opposite actually. People dont admit that they did something wrong, but instead want the other person to stop being mad. Like waving someone off "yeah-yeah, shut your mouth, you win".
[–]Yaspis3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Извините и Простите? 😏
[–]OnlyHanzo0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Da.
[–]PleaseCallMeTomato1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
я не ожидал наших тут увидеть
[–]Frequent-Mammoth0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Both are better than just the "sorry" we have where I live. With the Russian ones, you have to realize you fucked up for one and take responsibility, and the other is pretty self explanatory.
[–]david563870 points1 point2 points 4 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
True...true...TRUE. And I am not sorry.
I hear sorry a lot, usually when pardon me or excuse me would suffice. Sorry does nothing if you don't change your behaviors. It is a harmless promise at its best and vapid at its worst.
[–]PabloAsscrowbar90 points91 points92 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
To add on:
Don't say sorry when you know you haven't done anything wrong
Women love to manipulate men into thinking they are wrong and apologizing, when in fact, the women are wrong in the first place.
[–]jimmy_eat_womb6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
we are entering into philosophy here, because when two people disagree about what is 'wrong', how is this resolved within the self contained system of a monogamous relationship? one has to over rule the other? but if both parties are equals, neither can overrule the other, yet both will try to overrule the other. and that gets messy, which is why you see couples having enormous fights over stupid insignificant shit.
[–]JamesMercer17 points8 points9 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
If you’re being logical, it should be pretty simple. If what you’re being told to apologize for is how you “made someone feel,” no apology necessary, because offense is taken, not given, and it’s not your responsibility to make sure you don’t hurt someone’s feelings.
[–]TexasMilitia2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This
[–]GrinninGremlin3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Don't even say it then unless your action was intentional. Apologizing for something unfortunate but beyond one's control diminishes the value of a genuine heart-felt apology. I equate it to excessive use of "I love you too" that becomes a robotic reaction instead of an honest reflection of what you may truly feel. It is common for people to poke fun at a woman who is "fishing for compliments" but for many "fishing" for validation by an echo "I love you too" can become a similar pattern of evoking male habituated responses....except that due to the psychological desire to maintain consistency between one's words and actions, such repetitive auto-responses take on an almost hypnotic effect that influences actions instead of being merely words. Akin to chanting, repetition strengthens the neural pathways involved.
A better plan...resist the automatic impulse to auto-apologize and let your words be known as truly meaning what you say. In the long term, this builds respect.
[–]respectallwomyn52 points53 points54 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
you become aware that someone felt hurt by an action of yours
People feel hurt when they're offended. They can be offended at literally anything. It's not your responsibility to ensure people aren't offended.
[–]jimmy_eat_womb12 points13 points14 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
'im sorry.......
....
... that youre such an overly sensitive little bitch.'
[–]gtowerthrowaway18 points19 points20 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Don't ever apologize. Not ever.
This is such good advice for so many spheres of life, that in the few true exceptions, you'll just have to deal.
[–]Patricijaobjectdude16 points17 points18 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
God damn it's so much more easier to memorize WHEN to say sorry instead of worrying about when NOT to say sorry.
A year ago I wouldn't have agreed with this at all.
[–]MecurialMan8 points9 points10 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Yes I’ve learned that today’s liberal mentality would have you apologize for everything.
[–]mcantrell13 points14 points15 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
My immediate thought is that SJWs and the like love to create "boundaries" that they demand you not cross (but the idea of you having boundaries is laughable).
[–]kayfab9 points10 points11 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yes live by those rules and you will live a happy life
[–]Bourgeoisblues6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This....is actually solid advice.
[–]Duchat8 points9 points10 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
As a Canadian, this triggers me.
[–]niem2543 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Sorry, eh!
[–]Brococoflowers6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
" I'm sorry you think you deserve an apology"
[–]McUserton4 points5 points6 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
OMG you really are your father's daughter.
[+][deleted] 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
[deleted]
[–]laptopdragon0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Is it a mandate?
There must be other ways to communicate, even when it's terrible news.
[–]gonzajai2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Should probably add to not say sorry when telling the truth
[–]JamesMercer10 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
People are dumbfounded when you say something as simple as “it’s just a fact, it’s not supposed to make you feel anything, and if it does, that’s just on you.”
[–]b_eazy_dinero1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The opposite happens in the show “ lost in space” on Netflix, do not watch that show if you don’t want your blood to boil at the audacity of the women on the show lmao it’s infuriating. Every man in that show is on a leash.
[–]Fleeb4MrZurkon1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I feel this
[–]FlyingBaratoplata1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I couldn't keep up with the cuck soybois being offended by actions of mine. I'll never apologize for being a man.
[–]samzplourde0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
And a huge thing that most people do is the "sorry, but..." Where they feign an apology but back it up with a justification for whatever they're "apologizing" for, negating the idea what they're actually feeling apologetic. It's my #1 pet peeve and it's so painfully common.
[–]ImstarIordman0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Someone felt hurt? I'm sure librals are pussed off and butt hurt when I were my trump 2020 hat but I dont care and not only will u not say sorry I will lol
[+][deleted] 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
[removed]
[–]markmywords13470 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Don’t be sorry for participating a capitalist society. Don’t be sorry for buying a home. Don’t be sorry for earning an oil fueled combustion engine car with power everything. Don’t be sorry when driving your kids to the park. Do feel pity toward those that try to stop your way of life. Because they can’t.
[–]Libra_Maelstrom0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Say sorry if you disappointed others.. I mean only when you promised something and couldn’t deliver. Besides that. Perfect.
[–]avsky110 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I have a tendency of saying sorry if it's dark at night and I'm approaching a woman on the same path. I need to stop that
[–]CertainCrow10 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This hits home lol... even my best mate always jokes how I have to apologise fr existing or being born. Well that's come to an end.
Or course being Canadian doesn't help does it? 😂
[–]altworkstshirts0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I would cross out the first two on the left.
Boundaries that are unjustified are stupid.
Someone else's feelings are not your fault.
Being mistaken covers it all.
[–]mkov880 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Fuck those first two. That's how we got into clown world in the first place.
For instance.
Statement: There are two genders. I'm not sorry if that actions offends some retard faggot tranny NPC.
I'm also not sorry for saying retard, faggot, or NPC.
People are so god damn soft these days, it's disgusting.
Here's a couple more statements I'm not sorry for:
Gay people are cool. Faggots can suck an HIV infested dick.
Black people are cool. Niggers can get a fucking job and get off my tax dollar funded welfare support.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I can agree on one and three. Number two there I object too honestly to hell with feelings.
[–]applepiebreadpudding0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
someone felt hurt by an action of yours
does the action of existing without apologizing for it count?
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[–]MichaelSkarn_FBI183 points184 points185 points (9 children) | Copy Link
[–]OnlyHanzo64 points65 points66 points (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]Inverclacky20 points21 points22 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]jimmy_eat_womb3 points4 points5 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]OnlyHanzo10 points11 points12 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Yaspis3 points4 points5 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]OnlyHanzo0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]PleaseCallMeTomato1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Frequent-Mammoth0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]david563870 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]PabloAsscrowbar90 points91 points92 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]jimmy_eat_womb6 points7 points8 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]JamesMercer17 points8 points9 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]TexasMilitia2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]GrinninGremlin3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]respectallwomyn52 points53 points54 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]jimmy_eat_womb12 points13 points14 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]gtowerthrowaway18 points19 points20 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Patricijaobjectdude16 points17 points18 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]MecurialMan8 points9 points10 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]mcantrell13 points14 points15 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]kayfab9 points10 points11 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Bourgeoisblues6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Duchat8 points9 points10 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]niem2543 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Brococoflowers6 points7 points8 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]McUserton4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[+][deleted] (1 child) | Copy Link
[deleted]
[–]laptopdragon0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]gonzajai2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]JamesMercer10 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]b_eazy_dinero1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Fleeb4MrZurkon1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]FlyingBaratoplata1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]samzplourde0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]ImstarIordman0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[+][deleted] (2 children) | Copy Link
[removed]
[+][deleted] (1 child) | Copy Link
[removed]
[–]markmywords13470 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Libra_Maelstrom0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]avsky110 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]CertainCrow10 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]altworkstshirts0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]mkov880 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]applepiebreadpudding0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link