Thank you all for the lovely messages I’ve gotten over the past couple days.

Everything has been such a blur family and friend and people from the community who my husband and father impacted. My father trained the rabbi who gave his service. My husband’s students carried his coffin. I’ve gotten so many letters and phone calls just sharing what my father and husband did for the people of our community. I never realized what sort of pillars in the community they were .

My father was a rabbi for 40 years so the number of weddings, funeral, bris, mitzvahs is probably uncountable. The time he spent counseling is immeasurable. There’s probably no way to measure my father’s impact.

My husband ran a book store and taught at the Yeshiva and was super active in the community. My husband was always there when someone needed him and gave deeply and frequently.

That’s what I want my children to know their father and grandfather as. Caring and giving people who made the world better.

I’m slowly getting used to a new normal without my husband. My whole routine is shifted without him. I’m trying to keep things as normal as possible for the kids. I’ve been trying to keep for crying in front of them. But I keep breaking down. I’m not strong and this hard and terrifying and painful. I don’t see another side to this.