[PART TWO of the Masculinity is Power essay- the deconstruction of pseudo-masculinity]

The Myth of the Strong Independent Woman

When people lie they often say the absolute polar opposite of whats true- there are no small lies. Take, for instance, the Strong Independent Woman and the idea that to embody masculinity as a female is more difficult and more daring than receding into a feminine role- this is not only incorrect, but it's the polar opposite of the truth.

Embodying masculinity, in world of gender role negativity, is an easy path for a woman to take. Unlike a male with an overt presence of masculinity, a woman who embodies power will not have the authenticity of her masculinity tested because the social narrative is in place that the Strong Independent Woman is fighting against the establishment and succeeding- we should applaud her moxie rather than question her credentials.

The perception of the Strong Independent Woman is that she has had a very difficult and challenging path to get to whatever point she may be at- university student, new employee, career woman, middle management- that the average person will mentally applaud her tenacity so loudly that her achievements and ability will appear more impressive than they objectively are.

Since she is Strong and Independent, she will surely not allow herself to be "pushed around" (the parameters of which are defined by her), and she is sure to understand the laundry list of protocols should someone challenge her- using other women, nice men, HR, the police, and the court system to secure her end. And since taking her oppositions side would be understood as being "part of the larger social problem," she is granted immediate credibility for whatever claim she makes- she has overcome so much already, didn't you know?

You certainly do not want to fuck with a masculine woman, but for none of the reasons that she believes.

The White Knight as a Perversion of Masculinity 

My first experience with a White Knight was when I was a wee lad of fifteen. An awkward, doofy fifteen year old; with my Misfits cassette in my Walkman and my denim jacket. I had just gotten my very first girlfriend, and although I wouldn't really count this girl as my true first girlfriend in the years that followed, it was nice to be able to see a girl on a Saturday night and touch some boobs. Touching boobs... it was all about touching boobs. The year was 1995, and it was a simpler time.

Some things about me around this time: I had never been in a fight outside of playful roughhousing, I wasn't much of a bully outside of standard issue High School dickary, and I had no idea what I was doing with a girl. In my mind, you pushed for a hand job maybe around a month, at least two months for a blow job, and sex? That was a discussion to be had after six months- maybe a year.

So, like I said, fumbling with a bra on a Saturday night sounded great.

This girl was the best friend of my friend's girlfriend. One day, after about a week of my "dating" her (despite seeing her maybe twice), my friend comes up to me at school with a very serious expression on his face and says, "just so you know... if you lay a hand on Colleen... ever.... There's going to be problem with me and you......"

He seriously said that.

Even as a doofy fifteen year old, I wanted to laugh. LAY A HAND ON HER? This girl that I'm going to be seeing once a week, in her parents rec room, between 7:00 and 11:00pm? So, during that four hour stretch, instead of watching MTV and making out, I'd have to "show her the back of my hand" in order to "keep that [adolescent] bitch in line."

I said something like "yeah, okay," just to end the awful, awkward interaction, and it never came up again.

Now, looking back on this, twenty years later, it's obvious my friend never thought I was going to start beating the shit out of this girl that I dated for less than a month (no hand job), and he certainly didn't say this for an audience of gushing school girls around us; we were alone. So, why did my friend need to get in my face about street justice? Did bustin' make him feel good?

White Knights wouldn't need to be White Knights if they felt comfortable possessing a traditional masculine identity.

In place of a traditional masculine identity, the White Knight finds his identity in the self-appointed status of "necessary protector of women." The White Knight combines traditionalism, in the idea that women are in-need of a tough and fair man to protect them, and modern anti-male ideology where the White Knight happily relinquishes any shred of potential power he may have in order to emphasize that he is unlike those "other guys." Since embodying this demolition of masculinity may leave the White Knight feeling weakened, less-adequate, and with a confused identity, he falsely reclaims a feeling of masculinity by asserting moral-superiority over other men through serving social justice.

So, in other words, White Knights are nice guys who feel like pussies.

K I LL T O P AR T Y