I’m 18 in high school I became redpill at 15 when I got rejected for being a simp. After that I just digested redpill material all day everyday I’ve literally almost have watched/read everything and I now identify as a Mgtow/clean living king. Since I don’t like sexual degeneracy. But ever since I became redpill I have become resentful towards society and have isolated myself. I cut off all my female friends and I limit contact with girls so they don’t use me as a orbiter. And I deleted all social media and just focus on self improvement the thing is though I’m lonely and resentful.

I’m mostly in monk mode constantly and the rare times I go out in public I’m too redpill to enjoy it. When I see couples I’m low key resentful and I’m just like he’s a betabuxx simp. But I also want it too. But am too redpill to emjoy the relationship. Tbh I’m envious of the bluepillers but am also too woke and red pill. To get into a relationship. And I generally am too redpill to be a mindless sheep in society. What do I do. Just stay in monk mode ? It’s lonely but I don’t want to stoop to the level of a bluepiller. I low key want a relationship but have been burned before and am too redpill for it.