Wouldn't you love it if some friendly, confident guy invited you to do something fun like a gymnastic rings workout in the park?
We all would.
Why not become that guy? You get more of the social benefits if you become the initiator.
Here's how I did it...
First spend a little bit of time levelling up your social skills
Social SKILLS can be levelled up just like how we used to level up skills in a video game. What's your social skill level? Probably pretty low right now, don't worry we're going to powerlevel it.
Start by reading How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. There's a reason why so many people recommend this book.
The principles will seem like common sense, stuff that you already know like smiling, using someone's name and taking an interest in the other person however some of us rarely use these principles in our day to day lives.
Read the book and you'll be upping the intention you're putting into your social skills, fantastic.
Have fun stuff planned that you're going to do with or without anyone else
This is the next step where I've found most people refuse to take action. You have to be the one doing the fun stuff with or without anyone else.
This means this strategy of making friends requires more effort from you than just hoping daddy invites you to some social event. You are the one providing value to others. That's harder but again, the rewards are so much sweeter.
B-b-b-b-but there's nothing fun we can do in the COVID lockdown! All we can do is stay inside and play video games all day
There's lots of fun stuff you can organise whilst still following lockdown rules and staying safe. Start going on a weekly run or cycle or do outdoor workouts (I highly recommend looking up gymnastic rings). I really like this idea because any guy who's down to hit a workout automatically has a lot in common with me. They're usually into self improvement, care about nutrition and learning.
This fun stuff you have planned has to specifically be something you are keen to do by yourself and if anyone else joins you, cool.
This way you have a sort of outcome independence for the next step...
Practice approaching, speaking to strangers and inviting people to your fun event
This is what I call the Old Man Vibe.
Old men don't give a fuck. They'll walk past you and say how your shirt is similar to the one they had whilst they served in the military 50 years ago. They speak to strangers as if it's completely normal... because it is normal.
Social media has made us feel like it's weird to speak to people in person. But the moment you reduce your social media use and actually step outside your house, you realise everyone's sharing pleasantries as if its normal.
So adopt this old man vibe. Start doing that fun activity by yourself outside of your house. Naturally you'll come across far more people. Get used to speaking to strangers and then anyone who seems nice, invite them to join you in the fun activity.
Watch their face light up. Seriously.
Every single time I've spoke to someone random and invited them to join me in a gymnastic rings workout it's like I've just made their entire week. To date not 1 person has said no and I have made a best friend that I now train consistently with. We often have new guys join us for a session and they always thank us for inviting them.
Most of us feel lonely but refuse to do anything about it because taking action is uncomfortable. But the discomfort of delayed gratification always pays off for your future self. Give your future self that treat by investing into your social skills and getting consistent in some out-the-house activity.