My girlfriend has a male friend she talks to once in a while. He's a student and DJs on the side.
A couple months ago he's working at a more popular club in town and gets one of his female acquaintances in for free. They are all having a good time. At one point, he's joking around with her and playfully smacks her on the ass as he thinks she might be attracted to him. She's not into it, and he immediately recognizes that and apologizes.
The next day he goes on Facebook to relate the event. He uses it as an opportunity to apologize again to her and females in general. He goes on about how he respects women and that this was an uncharacteristic mistake. Most of the commentators come down on him hard, including his sister.
My girlfriend recently got an update from him. He tells her that the offended party complained to the club (after all the apologies), and he got fired from their DJ rotation. What's more, the management alerted all the other club owners in town, making it impossible secure new gigs. As this was how he helped pay for his schooling, he's in a rough spot and scrambling to find a new job. He says that this was a real wake-up call, and he's committed to better understanding the female perspective and learning to develop the utmost respect for them.
We all have our boundaries crossed from time to time. I believe a reasonable person simply makes that known to the offending party and moves on as long as there is no grievous harm. This is especially true when the person committing the offense is quick to apologize for the transgression.
You don't blow up the offense in a desperate bid for attention.
Most women will never understand what it means to take a real risk. In the back of their minds, they know they can be rescued from failures by friends, family, boyfriends, husbands, or the state. They have no idea what it means to face regular rejection in trying to secure the attentions of those they are attracted to. They have no idea how difficult it is to figure out which approach any one woman will be receptive to. Understanding this would require sympathy.
This guy took a chance and failed. No one was really hurt, but he paid a heavy price. He says the lesson he learned is that he should develop a greater appreciation and respect for women. I submit that the lesson he should learn is that there is no satisfying the ego of most women.
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