We don't talk about it because we live in a time and place that mistakes it for weakness. We don't even talk about it here because it's an instinct we often find ourselves having to suppress for our own good. But when /u/girlwriteswhat pointed out that if we didn't love women, there would be no anger phase, she absolutely right.
You are hardwired to be sympathetic to, and protective of women. Evolutionarily, that's what you are for. Keep the eggs safe. Ensure the next generation.
This is why there is an anger phase. This is why men have to come here and read motivational crap about not overvaluing bitches. Because it's easy to fall into that pattern.
You're all here, so you all know why you need to control it. We live in a culture that browbeats men into obeying women and fearing them, and this has been so successful that women now cannot tell the difference between healthy love, and spineless cowardice. We all know we have to clamp down on that instinct, and reserve that affection for the few women who are truly worthy of it, and have proven themselves so by earning it from us.
Once, our healthy instinct to protect was once in harmony with women's healthy instinct to respect men and obey male leadership. Why do you think feminists have to froth at the mouth so much about not being led or dominated by a man, ever? Because they are secretly tempted just like any sane woman, that's why.
Entire books could be written about why some women suddenly decided to wage war on their feminine instincts, and about why other women followed them, unawares, into that psychological desert. But regardless of why, that's where we are now, and we know we have to control the desire to see them smile.
The kind of love we need now is what used to be called "tough love"; not the love of a parent for a healthy, happy, well-adjusted child, but the love of a parent for the child whose heroin addiction is destroying the family.
"I cannot stop you from destroying yourself, but I will not allow you to take me or this family down with you. Next time you're in jail, use your phone to call someone else. Because I am done rescuing you."
Hide the protective instinct from women if you must, or admit it's there if you think you can do amused mastery well enough, but never deny its existence to yourself. Self-deception is not what we do here. This is why the anger phase is important. Pass through it and move on, but hold the memory of that anger, and of why you were angry, with you. Remember it when you need it to stiffen your spine.
And don't let your LTR turn you into a bitch.
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