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Gay 21-year-old guy. Boyfriend is pretty much the same as me. Hetero-passing (even though if someone asked we'd obviously tell them.) I've begun reading many of these posts and agree with a lot of what your guys are saying. The only idea I'm not really sure where the majority of people on here stand is when talking about people with feminine energy/characteristics. Is it to be believed that these people are of less value than straight/sexually dominant men? Also, I noticed that this sub has a pretty substantial amount of theory on gay men. Yet I haven't actually understood if, to most of you, gay men are less human/valuable than a more alpha/dominant/straight man. I find the discussions on gender roles/norms to be fascinating. I used to be a bit of a misogynist (not something to be proud of.) But sometimes I double-back and question myself. My boyfriend and I have been together for a year now and we take turns topping each other, and in my experience has been a 70/30 enjoyment experience. Topping/Bottoming respectfully. Any insight on this sort of dynamic?


[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

General idea is this:

  • Masculinity is dominant over femininity.

  • Feminine men are not of less value, objectively - that determination depends on your moral and philosophical outlook and what you think determines value, and whether people have intrinsic value on that. TRP does not take a stance on that.

  • Masculine men are of greater value than feminine men, socially and economically.

  • Nobody here believes that gay men are less valuable (objectively) than straight men. We're almost all gay men, and we're working on our internal sense of value and our external/social value. Socially, economically, and in the sexual marketplace, different people have different worth, period. In the gay community, a masculine man in good shape with money is of high value.

  • Have fun with your boyfriend. Enjoy sex. How you have sex is up to you. General TRP theory is that it is the man's job to make sex great. Since there are two men here, it would then be the dominant one's job to make sex great.

  • Why not be a misogynist? You're a man who fucks men. You have nothing to do with women if you don't want to, aside from working relationships. And in these relationships, as the man, ideally masculine, you are capable of establishing the unspoken rules, boundaries, etc.

Bottom line: work out, get in shape, get money, accomplish things, stay healthy, enjoy life. TRP is generally about sexual strategy, yes, but the advice here will also make you a better person. Again, 'better' depends on your moral judgments. Make your judgments about good, evil, the desired vs. the avoided, then pursue the good and shun the bad. Move toward your values and then you will be happy. Your well-being is paramount.

Do I contradict myself? Sure. Whatever. Make yourself great.

[–]azgary1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

We're all different. If your relationship is working, don't question it. Good for you!

[–]should_1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I think every relationship and interaction has a power dynamic, so those value assignments can be handy as to what's most useful for you in that moment, for the next few years, or in life. Saying "I have to cull my birthday list by 2 people since it'll be at a smaller bar than I originally thought, so therefore the 2 most fem ones have to go" doesn't make sense.

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[–]hatessw0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm not entirely sure why I am in this sub, but I might as well respond.

Is it to be believed that these people are of less value than straight/sexually dominant men?

No, just less desirable to me.

Yet I haven't actually understood if, to most of you, gay men are less human/valuable than a more alpha/dominant/straight man.

No, although I think I'm statistically more likely to be attracted to a straight bloke than a gay dude without knowing their orientations in advance, even when correcting for the proportion of the population they make up.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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