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First post (self.askMRP)

submitted by envanligmann

Hi i found this site very resently and is not that familiar to Reddit in general. I have found a lot of Information that i found interesting. What is the best way to start to find the most valueble content here in order to start learning?

I am 43, married with kids. I seem to both attract crazy girls and also i think i attribute to negative Dynamics in relationships where i end up trying to please her, trapped within her frame. I am not happy with it, a childhood with unstable mother and a stepdad that was anoyed i existed probably attributted to some self asteem and anciety issues. I want to fix myself and go on to live a happier life more in charge of myself and becoming less pathetic in general


[–]screechhaterRed Beret16 points17 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Start lifting weights. Seriously. Don’t fuck around. Get a trainer if needed

Start by reading “no more mister nice guy”

Clean up your diet, lose weight change up your wardrobe if needed. Be more outgoing

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Take it from another new guy. 3 months in, this shit works.

[–]IRunYourRiver4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Seconded. 3 mos as well.

[–]gettingmymojobackRed Beret6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Go over to marriedredpill and get to work on the sidebar materials. Someone even had the foresight to put them in a recommended order to answer questions like yours.

But before you do that, go lift some heavy things, then put them down, then pick them up again, then put them down, then.....you get the idea.

[–]2ndalRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Read the sidebar on /r/AskMRP and /r/marriedredpill. The sidebar is just a collection of frequently asked questions, new member guides, book recommendations, and so on. You can view the sidebar most easily from a desktop computer, where it literally resides on the right side of the page when viewing content on those subreddits. On mobile the sidebar is usually buried in a menu somewhere depending on the app you're using.

You can also sort subreddits by most popular over periods of time. Sort both by popularity of all-time and read the top 100 posts or so.

That'll give you a good start.

[–]470_2_700_nm1 point2 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

StrongLifts 5x5 is your most important step. Everything else is secondary. Next post in askMRP put up your numbers. Here are my StrongLifts 5x5’s.

Bf 13% , weight 185 lbs squat 230, bench 180, row 180 deloaded to 150 to get form right, ohp 125 deadlift 275.

I wasted a lot of time on “upper body exercises” which took me along way but I would be so much further in lifting had I gotten a squat rack and Olympian weights right away. Download 5x5 StrongLifts and find a gym with a squat rack, and find out your body fat %. Re post after your first week of lifting and once you can provide body fat %.

Community will kick you in the balls from there to get your weak ass out of this funk.

Go lift.

[–]drty_prRed Beret0 points1 point  (7 children) | Copy Link

IMO, 5x5 makes a good template, but you need more than those 5 lifts. You're crazy if you think a sculpted 6 pack comes from comounds, if you think the bent over row is gonna be enough to build really defined lats or that not pressing dumbells once a week isn't a recipe for future failure.

[–]mindfulbutgutlessRed Beret1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

You're crazy if you think a sculpted 6 pack comes from comounds

Abs are made in the kitchen. Not the gym.

[–]drty_prRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The lack of fat on your stomach comes from the kitchem. The definition that is there due to lack of fat comes from the gym.

[–]Reach180Red Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

New lifters have to walk the path from step 1. Arm curls with pink dumbbells don't get you anywhere either.

Got to build a base before you start worrying about defined lats.

[–]SepeanRed Beret0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

To be fair regarding lats, StrongLifts specifies that if you’re lifting for aesthetics you should add weighted pull ups.

[–]470_2_700_nm0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

My best abs since starting a MAP was from un weighted pull ups and chin ups with pushups. Lots of them too, daily.

My best sex along with the ability to pick my wife up and cary her around like a little girl came from squatting and 5x5.

I plan on moving to mad cow once I plateau on all lifts. I’m still a beginner.

[–]drty_prRed Beret0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

My point was not to slander you, but to say that 5x5 is great to get really strong. If you want a wicked body, much more is needed though

[–]470_2_700_nm0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes I get that.

[–]470_2_700_nm1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Two main places to start: the gym and the kitchen. 5x5 StrongLifts And body fat 12%.

Focus all your reading on how to achieve your best at both of these endeavours.

Don’t listen to the other guys who say to inject your dick with coconut oil. The results are not worth the long term pain.

Edit - I posted twice here par accident but I don’t want to delete this post in case OP was thinking to inject his dick with coconut oil because you know, those other guys, they inject theirs dicks with coconut oil, but us... us men... our dicks only see coconut oil on the outside. Those other coconut dick heads... they... they don’t know.

[–]thunderbeyond0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Holy hell I have no idea what you are talking about with injecting coconut oil... do I want to know???

[–]abudun790 points1 point  (7 children) | Copy Link

First of all: STFU. Really, it's the single most important advice. STFU.

Second: Stay away from r/TRP and game advice gurus.

Read the sidebar, although not everything mentioned there is gold. My personal favorites are NMMNG and The Rational Male (the blog) and MMSLP (in that order). Invest the time to fully grasp what Rollo Tomassi is writing and start with year one. It's complicated but starts to make sane and then the pieces come together.

[–]SepeanRed Beret1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

I never saw the use in Rollo’s writing. It’s interesting reading, but it is mostly social commentary with very little actionable advice. Not what I’d recommend to someone seeking to improve.

[–]abudun791 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

The internet is full of people who give you short or longer explanation of something and then spend thousands of words to tell you what you have to think about that; aka give advice. Rollo Tomassi often says that he will not give advice. The Rational Male is not aimed towards people who want or need to be told what to think and how to act.

And that is one thing that makes his essays harder to understand than most other authors - he assumes that the reader make up his own mind. The flip-side of that coin is, that if someone spends enough time to understand what he is writing, and then matches this against his own common sense and experience, the gained benefits top every other resource I've found - online and offline.

It's a reward, not a participation trophy.

[–]SepeanRed Beret0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

Again, I think his writing is interesting. I just don’t think it is useful.

It sounds like you’re taking way too abstract an approach to the red pill. This isn’t something you need to make up your mind about. We’re dealing with facts about human psychology and practical, tested methods of manipulating it.

Rollo himself says he won’t give advice, so it sounds like agrees.

[–]abudun790 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

If that approach works for you and give you results that satisfy you, it's perfect for you.

Usually what someone may benefit from is limited by the previous achieved personal development and education. So things can change over time.

[–]SepeanRed Beret1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

So what are you saying? That people need to learn something that is in Rollo’s writings before they can develop frame and game? How do you figure than when there’s a lot of alphas out there who don’t know much of anything?

[–]abudun792 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I don't know how to respond to you any longer, without only repeating myself or being dismissive.

[–]DeplorableRay0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Rollo's book was the most influential of all the side bar material, personally. Granted, it's more philosophy than "how-to." Red-pill, for me, has been more of an enlightenment to the economics of sexual behavior and the understanding of hypergamy. That's Rollo's lane. The rest of the side bar was just good information for navigating said epiphanies. The "how-to" part.

YMMV

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I read it a thousand times about STFU, but it took two years before I actually was able to employ it habitually and as part of my character. Shutting up works better than almost anything. Women hate to hear men talk; they like to see them act. The minute you blab too much, it signals to them that you are a woman.

Read a handful of books from the sidebar. After a while, they can all blend together. Pick one or two that really stick out to you (For me, it was Models and No More Mr. Nice Guy). Get in a habit of reading or audio-booking those two main ones to stay fresh.

Don't talk in bed. Be more aggressive. Claim her when you want to. It's exactly what the mailman Chad would do if we snuck in while you were at work. That no-holds-barred aggression is what is missing and what she secretly desires. I resisted that fact for a long time but once I employed it, I saw results.

Develop better male friendships. Find reasons to bond with strangers who are men whether it's over their sense of fashion, sports, fishing- whatever.

Good luck. You'll do just fine.

Oh, and lift.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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