TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

22

Been together 6 years. I have been plugging away at the side bar like you guys have been telling me. My main 3 focuses for this month we’re

  • get to the gym 4-5 days a week.
  • practice STFU
  • STOP operating in her (or anyone) else’s frame.

I have really been getting the hang of STFU. She’s trying extra hard to get me to react. Pull me into her frame. Trying to pick fights. I’m not having it. I have either been ignoring her (esp if it’s through text). Ignoring her. Changing the Subject. Or going and doing something else. The test have been getting less and less.

An episode happened last night. We had people over for food and drinks. It was a great night. But at the end of the night. We were all talking about going for a ride on my motorcycle. My buddies wife (who always hits on me so she doesn’t like her to begin with) said she wanted to go on the bike. I tell her let’s go (it was a joke we had all been drinking and I only have one helmet anyway)

She’s like let’s do it. My Wife says no you don’t have helmets and been drinking. We keep joking about it for another minute. My wife goes outside. And I poked fun at her to my buddy and his wife. I guess my wife heard and took offense to it. Came back in and tried to throw a fit. I tell her stop it.

She goes back outside and sends me like 5 text.

“I can’t believe my husband would talk shit about me” “So disrespectful” “If don’t want to accept me and my morals. I’ll leave don’t act cool in front of your friends”

Stuff like this I honestly don’t even know what she was talking about Bc it wasn’t even like that. So I just ignore it.

She comes back in and we all split ways Bc it was late. The shit continues. I keep saying to myself “you will not enter her frame” she starts crying. Fake crying. I don’t even know. I just keep dodging everything she’s saying. And treat her like a 4 year old mostly because she’s half in the bag and acting like one.

I finally grab her and start making out with her. She stops crying. Next thing I know she starts sucking my dick saying all crazy shit. Starts riding me. My mind has been blown. We always have sex. She doesn’t deny me usually ever. But this was different. This was the slut I have been waiting for.

I will continue reading. Continue working. I know this is just a little thing and I’m no where near where I need to be but I’m starting to see it work. My wife is a control freak and wants to have a say in everything. I will go buy a shower curtain and she will come home with a different one 2 days later because she didn’t like it. Stuff like that.

I guess my question is be where to go from here? Am i on the right track?

I will continue working. And reading. My next step is to really hone in on my mission and how to get a business going.


[–]MrChad_ThundercockChief Autist in Charge13 points14 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Living your own life - check

Not letting wife’s feelz affect you - check

Having fun with friends - check

Competition anxiety - check.

Right track - check

Go from here? More game, more dread, up your SMV, enjoy life.

Edit: “My wife is a control freak and wants to have a say in everything”

Probably because you set it up like this from the beginning. She saw your lack of leadership and was forced to take over... which leads to resentment. Take control, be more dominate. Little things like shower curtains though, who gives a fuck, tell her that you decided that she can pick one out.

[–]thunderbeyond1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You know that u/MrChad_Thundercock approves if his comment doesn't finish with "faggot"!

[–]creating_my_life3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

You're doing great. You get it. Read and STFU. Most men never get that far.

she starts crying. Fake crying. I don’t even know.

It's just negotiating.

I tell her stop it.

I would have engaged less. Just disengage. A&A. But don't rationalize, DEER, or control. She's a smart girl, she'll get it.

[–]InconspicuousWand1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I said stop it in a laughing “oh stop it” type manner but I will engage less next time. Thank you

[–]creating_my_life1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Amused Mastery works well, too. You're fine.

[–]tmh88mrp0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Man, that’s an important point. When I read your OP I thought you told her to stop in a more stern way. Now it makes more sense how you proceeded to make out with her following that.

[–]BobbyPeru2 points3 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

You did good by escalating the sex – obviously she was turned on by another woman wanting you.

Now when she brings it up (and she will, I promise) you need to focus on not DEERing about it. AM or A&A it. Or You might even be able to escalate sex again, so another words - AM it and Escalate the sex

[–]InconspicuousWand0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy Link

She brought it up this morning.

She said please don’t talk shit about me or disrespect me.

I didn’t really know how to AA so I just said I didn’t. And changed the subject.

Then she brought up “ X has the biggest crush on you”

I said “oh yeah?”

She said yea you can tell by the way she acts around you.

I just didn’t say anything and then fucked her shortly after in the bathroom over the sink 🤷🏻‍♂️

I kind of suck at AA. I’m good at it for simple shit like

“Are you cheating on me?”

Yes I slept with 3 women just this morning.

But I suck when it’s more complex like. Don’t disrespect me? She has a crush on you? Stuff like that

[–]BobbyPeru0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy Link

Winning

[–]InconspicuousWand0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy Link

Any advice on AA. I suck it at it edited my post about talking about it

[–]simbarlionRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Be cocky funny but don't force it. You will come across as a wanker if you try to hard.

The cheating / 3 women example was spot on.

I personally think AA is good in theory but tough in practice in a LTR. She knows you too well, unless you are naturally like that.

Don't go rAAmbo

[–]BobbyPeru0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

You have to develop your own style. Start small and build up. You can’t just go from a bumbling DEER to the king of AA. Just try it here and ther, and if you have any natural wit, it should come to you after a bit

[–]SepeanRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lots of good posts on it. If you can't do AA, you can fall back to amused mastery, it's pretty much just a smirk.

[–]PersaeusRed Beret2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

it's time for you to move from STFU to AM/A&A with a vengance.

who gives a fuck about the shower curtain. tell her to go get a shower curtain. when she brings it home, tell her you hate it even if you don't

[–]InconspicuousWand0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lmao alright. I suck at AA unless it’s simple

[–]maxofreddit1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

From the sounds... stay the course.

You’re seeing it work... so let it work.

[–]Heisendrrd0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

what is AA 🙈

[–]Chump_No_More0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Agree and Amplify.

Agree & Amplify Theory

Acing the Test

Learn it. Live it.

[–]Heisendrrd0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thanks!

[–]SorcererKingMod / Red Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I guess my question is be where to go from here?

Upward. Always upward.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2024. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter