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Divorce happening now. What to do before lawyer meeting? (self.askMRP)

submitted by OverthinkerTRP

Meeting with lawyers Friday and Wednesday for initial consult. We both made clear we are done tonight. We share a joint checking and savings, I have the 2 credit cards with my name only and she has her own with her name only. Payday this Friday.


[–]RuleZeroDADRed Beret5 points6 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

Uh, and a young daughter too, and side business, and chance she'll move back home (taking daughter) thousands of miles away...

Lots to discuss above and beyond finances. Be prepared to discuss everything.

[–]OverthinkerTRP[S,🍰] 1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

Yeah she already mentioned plans to fly back in the meantime. Don't know if I have any legal recourse

[–]RuleZeroDADRed Beret7 points8 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

If you live in the USA, most states have the option to seek an emergency custody order to prevent parental kidnapping.

Outside 'Murica, hopefully options are available.

[–]OverthinkerTRP[S,🍰] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Ok thanks

[–]nantucketghost2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

deleted REMOVED BY AUTOSCRIPT - GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD

[–]BluepillProfessorMod / Red Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

We have an extradition treaty with several countries. Strangely, I don't think any are in the Middle East.

[–]BluepillProfessorMod / Red Beret1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

We are MRP, not /r/RedPilllegalhelp

Your lawyer can file a motion for an "emergency ex-parte order to maintain the status quo" which prevents moving the child (or the money). I would get on it yesterday. If she moves the child guess what? Now she has an "established custodial environment" and wins the custody issues 99.9999% of the time.

[–]OverthinkerTRP[S,🍰] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Sat down with lawyers today. They filled me in. Thank you everyone

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

What should you do before lawyer meeting?

--nail down, as best as you can, ALL income sources and ALL expenses. Get a rough estimate on how much you and she bring in; and how much is actually spent every month to run Family OverthinkerTRP, Inc.

--determine what you want regarding property division, kid custody. Then determine what you can live with regarding property divisiona dn child custody. Then determine how you will handle it if you get fucked over in either one of those major issues.

--DO NOT make any agreements with your STBX until you have met with the lawyers.

--start documenting absolutely everything.

--come up with a plan to be a model dad to the kid(s) and then do it.

--can't be overemphasized -- be very very clear on what you want, what you can live with, and what you can/will do if it goes sideways.

[–]OverthinkerTRP[S,🍰] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Great points, thanks

[–]InChargeManRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Apply Vaseline liberally

[–]BrazilRedPill1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Dude, what is working for me:

  1. Delay lawyer meeting. Set a date for a month from now.

  2. In this one month you will build up a historic for yourself, to be used in court in case of need.

  3. Say to your wife that you don't hate each other, that you will do this the best way possible for the kids.

  4. Set up when you will see the kid (I suggest every other weekend and 2 additional days of the week like Tuesday and Thursday).

  5. Set up how much you will pay every month for the kid and start paying, using and identified deposit in her account. I suggest 20% of your monthly income.

  6. Talk about who stays with what.

  7. Don't fight, don't be butthurt, be passive now. It will pay you later.

  8. Don't care if she shows herself with Chad. She owns you nothing on that matter anymore, neither do you to her.

  9. Do go out. Go to places under the radar. Do fuck girls. It will do you a lot of good.

  10. After one month, you will be able to say that your kid was ok with your custody arrangement, as so as with the money you provided. Now seek the lawyer and finish the papers.

[–]BluepillProfessorMod / Red Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Delay lawyer meeting.

Wrong! Don't delay at all bro. There are already threats to take the children all the way across the country.

Also what the fuck is this agreeing to "visitation" with your own God Damn child!!!!!! Fuck that right now. The established environment should be that dad sees the kid any time he damn well pleases. Go for Joint Custody. Pay the bills on the house if you are paying now (that is maintain the status quo and don't default on any joint- or single- bills) but won't assume you will be paying her.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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