TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

6

Due to some scheduling dynamics at work, I've found myself with some unexpected down time at work between client engagements. I'm in an industry driven by billable hours, so times like this are best to take vacation.

Anyway, I've never taken a trip totally solo in my life before and feel like this is the perfect opportunity. I'm going to book a few days somewhere warm, sunny and ideally on a beach--ideally the Caribbean (also have never been). Given my current marital situations, I feel like it'll be a great opportunity to get some time to myself and totally clear my head. It's not so much that I'm going intentionally without her, just that it's so last minute that she can't get the time off work.

Any of you married folk out there do this before? How did you enjoy the experience? I'm a bit torn because if my wife wanted to do the same, then I'd immediately suspect that she's heading off on a trip without me to enjoy a brief CC ride.

Edit: we don't have kids.


[–]ex_addict_broRed Beret7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

W/o kids? No idea, no experience here, but IIRC, MAP or 12 levels of dread suggested something like that.

W/ kids? I took a solo trip with my 2 older sons 6 months before divorce. Everything went very smooth, so the next time I went with them for holidays, I had all the framework in place. I also clearly saw that I don't need her to have fun with my sons.

[–]resolutions3166 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

We actually planned this out this year - one for each of us, no kids.

It was my idea - being away really increased my appreciation for my family and cleared my head after too much "work-babies-work-babies" grind.

This year I'm thinking of trying the Appalachian trail with a friend. Or, I might just explore some place alone.

Traveling alone is an incredible experience - the only time NO ONE else has any claim on my time. That's incredibly liberating.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I think about running the trail. Id love to get some lightweight camping equipment and run it...food logistics and weight would be an issue I have to research.

[–]LymanRP[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Traveling alone is an incredible experience - the only time NO ONE else has any claim on my time. That's incredibly liberating.

That's refreshing to hear, and what I'm looking for in the trip... just some time to myself to relax on a beach and clear my head.

[–]dandar46002 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm a bit torn because if my wife wanted to do the same, then I'd immediately suspect that she's heading off on a trip without me to enjoy a brief CC ride.

As a captain you lead with example. Is solo vacations an example you want to set? This will become a precedent. What happens when the next time you're busy she wants to go to Caribbean? Are you going to be fine with that?

Either go together or use that time to finish a project at home you never can seem to get around to.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You do not sound confident enough to do something like this without your hamster exploding.

[–]UEMcGillI am become McGill, Destroyer of Blue Pill2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I do it all the time. My. Wife and I have different travel styles. She's not outdoorsy and I love to fish and shoot. She also doesn't like 3rd world countries. So I'll go away somewhere she has no desire to go to. I've also gone to europe without her.

I like traveling with my wife, we've done Paris, Berlin, the Caribbean, lots of the US, but I don't expect her to do the other things I like.

The key to any of it; own your intentions. Going away because you want me time? Say it. Going away because you have time right now? Own it. Don't DEER, don't justify it.

[–]LymanRP[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

The key to any of it; own your intentions. Going away because you want me time? Say it. Going away because you have time right now? Own it. Don't DEER, don't justify it.

Roger that. It's definitely a combination of wanting me time + having the available time. She knows that and I will own it.

[–]marin_guy2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I would suggest that if you do this that you not go to the Caribbean, if your plan is to lie on the beach rubbed down with cocoa butter within a sterile resort setting. Save that trip for being with your wife. If you're going solo pick a destination that will involve adventure and some enlightenment. Where you do not have to accommodate for a women's need for comfort. Cuba, Central America, etc..

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Are you chiding. Without her, the trip is ten times more fun.

[–]The_LitzRed Beret-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Due to some scheduling dynamics at work, I've found myself with some unexpected down time at work between client engagements. I'm in an industry driven by billable hours, so times like this are best to take vacation.

You have essentially just DEER'ed your solo holiday to us. What do you want to do? My guess is your frame is not totally strong enough to stand up to the scrutiny she will put it under.

May I suggest something a little less daring? A day or 3 somewhere less inviting? Build up to it.

And by the way, solo travel is great. I love it and recommend it. Your time is your time.

[–]screechhaterRed Beret-3 points-2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Stay home. Take her to llunch

Bust some ads around the house

Why feed the hamster ? What so bad at home you have to clear your head traveling ?

[–]ParadoxThatDrivesUs0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Is this sarcasm? If OP wants to head to the beach and there's no kids involved, he should do it.

[–]screechhaterRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

It's up to him, he mentions "marital status condition" with no explanation

It's neither right nor wrong, just needs to way some options as to an outcome to his strategy in the agenda of sexual strategy

OP is free to do and to read the post.

Lost of guys work the rolkercoastwr of billable. I do. Own it and Finns balance or blow your shit up. Like LTRs.

I could give 10 fucks

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2024. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter