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8

Rebounding from a fuckup (self.askMRP)

submitted by I_Took_The_Pill

Hey guys,

I've been around here for a while now, lurking back and fourth in MRP and here- I've read all the sidebar stuff, and on and off made some progress. Finally made an ALT to get more involved in these communities

Last night I slipped. We hadn't fucked in weeks, I had been keeping busy, not letting it get to me, keeping a positive demeanor despite the fact that as every day ticked by I was getting more and more frustrated. I was lying in bed, awake, fuming, and I victim puked all over the place:

"I just want to know that I'm not the only one frustrated by this"

Needless to say, this escalated into an argument, maybe more of what you could call an "airing of grievances" on my part, explaining to her how I was trying to be cool but I just couldn't fake it anymore.

I think on one hand the openness is good, but overall it was a total loss of frame- Pussy shit.

Today, wake up, drive to work, need to pull myself back together- How do you guys rebound from stuff like this? I plan to move on like nothing happened, not bring it up again, and keep fighting the fight.

Appreciate the help.


[–]cholomiteMod / BP Downvote Magnet 7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

There's nothing you can do but play it off and keep moving forward. Make sure you don't dwell on how pussy that shit was. Keep an upbeat attitude and act like it never happened. And for fucks sake don't ever do that shit again.

I'm sure you already know this, but get the idea out of your head that you're owed sex. You're not, only truly worthy men get the sex they want. If you're not getting it, it's on you, so keep improving. Also try working on your seduction skills. Even a shredded millionaire will have a hard time getting laid if he doesn't know how to properly play with a girls emotions.

[–]RPAlternate42Red Beret 4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

You haven't fucked in 3 weeks.

Have you been initiating? If so and she has been rejecting you at every turn, why are giving her any attention at all? I don't know how long you've been in your self-improvement, but after 3 weeks I'd just start making a social life separate from her and especially where other women are involved.

If you have not been initiating, then you are making very covert contracts.

In either case, you need to ask yourself if you are someone who deserves to be fucked or that women want to fuck. The only way to know this is by getting IOIs from other women and running day game on women... basically.you need to know if you are even desirable by strange; if strange doesn't want you, your wife never will.

[–]I_Took_The_Pill[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I have been initiating, but maybe not as much as I could. You're right about the covert contracts, for some reason, maybe subconsciously, I was expecting sex, which I think is why I got so worked up when I didn't get it.

As far as the strange, I'm an attractive guy, tall, in good shape, so women often do hit on me. Good advice to get out and be social, I spent the whole weekend with her sort of waiting for sex because it'd been such a long time, which I realize now was a big mistake.

[–]mabden[🍰] 2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

We hadn't fucked in weeks

Because you have been initiating and she is turning you down or because of covert contracting?

[–]I_Took_The_Pill[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I think I've eliminated many of the covert contracts I was relying on, Over the past few weeks there have been lots of soft no's- it's usually pretty evident when it's not going to happen, so I don't push the issue.

As far as covert contracts go, I do still think I have a mindset that "if everything is right, we should have sex" basically, we're alone in the house, just got back from a night out, or something like that, so "why wouldn't we have sex??"

I haven't seen this attitude as a covert contract, but maybe in some ways it is...

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Don't stop. Unless hard no. That's basic stuff

[–]Olderpiller 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I think own of the less appreciated tenants of MRP is STFU. I have avoided many an argument just by saying nothing and walking away. Also when I screw up I most often just ignore it when I next have to deal with the wife make a mental note and move on. You are forgetting how easily women are distracted. Instead of apologizing, text your wife and tell her to meet you at your favorite bar after work, wear something nice. Ignore her questions, show up about 20 minutes early and chat up all the other women, then when she walks in greet her with a kiss and an ass slap. You would be amazed how well that will work. Even she is inclined to make a scene she will switch to mate guard her man when she sees you happy and talking to someone else. Her jealousy will be redirected to pride and wetness when she gets her ass slapped by a guy with social validation.

[–]sh0ckley 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

This sounds like a great plan. Thanks.

[–]SepeanRed Beret 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I plan to move on like nothing happened, not bring it up again, and keep fighting the fight.

Exactly. Just build your frame and raise your SMV and everything will be good in the end.

Think of it like your wife having small boobs. It doesn't matter what she says, she still has small boobs. If she one day comes home with breast implants, she doesn't have to explain her previously small boobs for you to enjoy them.

It is the same with your frame and SMV.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Post about your failed initiations. If you don't have several to talk about after three weeks, then you know where your problem is.

[–]I_Took_The_Pill[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

This actually brings up an interesting point, I responded elsewhere in this thread that I'd gotten a few soft no's, and another user responded saying not to stop unless I got a hard no, and that that was one of the basics.

I'm in a situation where, if I push a soft no, I'm probably not going to get a hard no, I'll just end up with some terrible duty sex, which obviously I don't want.

So this makes me wonder, better to leave it at a soft no if I know she's not into it, or keep pushing and have starfish sex result. What do you think about this?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

What do you think about this?

A common approach is that if you're getting starfish sex, you fuck the living shit out of her anyway.

Another approach is that if you're getting starfish sex, you can say no thanks, have OI, go do something else, etc.

I think either is probably fine, though it depends on the situation. I'm inclined to ask you to post more about your failed initiations in the main MRP sub and go from there.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

So...

Whenever mine says no, and we fight, I tend to explain my feelings and thoughts logically. And she agrees. And while I do the dishes and she plays on her X box, that I bought her, I make sure I apologize for making her feel like she is only there for me as a sexual object. Because she is my one and only and I love her unconditionally.

Ok, No seriously?

I go and do something else, something productive. And I will ask myself one question : what did I do to produce tingles today?

If nothing, I get nothing. And that is ok ON HER end...

on my end... If I am getting nothing for something... I am probably lacking in some OI /Abundance

just a thought.

[–]Boesman12 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thanks for this. Practical way to view and own her tingles or lack thereof.

[–]dandar4600 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

STFU and time. Everyone here fucked up at one time or another. All you can do is work on yourself, take care of your shit and initiate.

[–]redearththeory 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Today, wake up, drive to work, need to pull myself back together- How do you guys rebound from stuff like this? I plan to move on like nothing happened, not bring it up again, and keep fighting the fight.

Its not "moving on like nothing happened". Its stopping doing things that don't work (victim puking, being butthurt) and starting doing things that do work (lifting, improving, holding frame, dread). It just feels like doing nothing because you're going to not do all that pussy shit that you feel like doing.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

Lol, she took your lolly away?

You know there's a candy store down the street, right? Ever think about browsing next time your sweet tooth kicks in?

[–]screechhaterRed Beret 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Can you not initiate ?

Some read here and go all retard and angry acting and expect to do a few things and she notices.......

Remember, the last thing you talk about is wanting anything. The first thing you show is OI and abundance mentality ....

She can be replaced and you had better get it through your thick skull

dread and attractiveness well ? Where do you stand ?

What is it exactly you are here for ? ?? Get your shit together literally, from your fucking sock drawer to the gutters on the roof to grooming and hygiene...... Are you fuckable ???

Are you getting some distance between you ? Well ? Seriously, get some fucking distance. Like go to the library and read make yourself scarce Go to the gym. You don't need her in your life to be happy. You Fucktard

Just FYI. I turned the heat up on my SO so much, as in her taking care of her responsibltirs around the house from 50/50 on the laundry and stupid shit like her picking up after herself to servicing her own vehicle, because I just got too busy, she started caving all at once ... Believe me, they notice and feel all. "B-but, why arrrrrrrre you going to the gym so much ?"

Mine is a cast iron bitch with a steel rod for a spine that used to be DTF..... My absence and lack of catering to any and almost all, has her crying sometimes, I just shrug, "Between three kids, work and taking care of myself, what do want me to do ?" I ask, then add, with some amusement, "guess I'll take a day off work to get pleased..... too.... " Laughimg my head off, cause you know, I'm such an asshole, right ? "What does that mean ?" " You know like a massage ? ........" And, out the door. Cause I got shit to do

Are you leaving after a "no". Are you then cuddling ? I have told mine, "you are not letting me touch you, so get the fuck off me ". The difference between me and most ? I own that statement, no matter how unattractive, I stay in frame, as in she is to remove her hands from me and this is my body and it is now untouchable, just like the feminazis she fucking loathes, , "good night, this is my bed and my kingdom'" If you can say no, then I can too, and we ain't fucking cuddling

**Dread, and you got Options, right ? Are you lifting or attractive ? "

As of today, it's another day, Fucktard, and if you haven't noticed, that is her operandi, and you better be getting busy, like going camping with some friends this weekend, without her, gym without her, and you had better be chatting up a lot of people without her, causing dread and high value with people waving or saying high when she is with you. Take your fucking blinders off, she ain't special

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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