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Update on GF who deleted her Snapchat app when I was with her. Well handled? (self.asktrp)

submitted by CeremonyTree

So I decided that it was time to end things. I last saw her on Sunday, and didn't hear from her until today (We've been meeting up Wednesdays and some weeks on the weekends). Here's the text exchange (she's D):

D: Hey cool kid how are you

Me: I'm good. Give me a call.

D: Something about going to the beach and she'll call me in 20

Me: That's fine. Just wanted to let you know that we won't be seeing each other anymore

D: what the fuck

D: what the fuck happened

D: CeremonyTree?

D: This weekend went soooo good I don't understand what happened

Me: Call me in the next 10 minutes

So she calls me and I tell her that I'm just unhappy with her and that she won't stop playing games. Very short conversation. She tried telling me about how her mother knows me and that she had a dream about me and most importantly made it a point to tell me that she never cheated on me. I told her there's no hard feelings and that maybe I'll see her around. She's friends with some of mine.


[–]ChadsLeftNut163 points164 points  (31 children) | Copy Link

that she never cheated on me

her telling you this means she either did it or was thinking about doing it. Good call. Now go lift and fuck new pussy, life is good brother

[–]CeremonyTree[S] 38 points39 points  (26 children) | Copy Link

Working on that. I really want to get my diet in line. Any tips?

[–]ChadsLeftNut21 points22 points  (25 children) | Copy Link

Tips on diet? First give your stats please, height, weight, are you fat, skinny, skinnyfat etc

[–]CeremonyTree[S] 12 points13 points  (23 children) | Copy Link

Yeah on what you use when you're trying to get down to low bf%. I'm 6', about 185, I'd say I'm somewhere around 13% bf. Somewhat visible abs and was lifting frequently until recently.

[–]TSM_Bjergson28 points29 points  (20 children) | Copy Link

Competitive bodybuilder here, inbox if you need some more advice.
Lift in the 8-12 rep range. If you can't do 8 with good form, too heavy. If you can do more than 12, too light. Keep majority of carbs pre and post workout. Eat your weight (in lbs) in protein. Ex 200lb male should get in 200g protein a day.
Supplement with shakes if needed, vitamin D, Omega 3, and creatine monohydrate.

[–]CeremonyTree[S] 3 points4 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Awesome. A couple of quick questions:

How do I know what supplements to take or just say fuck it and take them all?

Sometimes, if I can do maybe 12 reps on set one, the next I'll only be able to do 8-9 and on the third like 6-7. Should I lower the weight in this case? Three sets good?

I've just been doing split workouts, should I upgrade?

[–]TSM_Bjergson2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Awesome. A couple of quick questions:

How do I know what supplements to take or just say fuck it and take them all?

Sometimes, if I can do maybe 12 reps on set one, the next I'll only be able to do 8-9 and on the third like 6-7. Should I lower the weight in this case? Three sets good?

I've just been doing split workouts, should I upgrade?

Certain supplements you take on an empty stomach, others with meals. The ones I listed I'd just have with your first meal.
That's perfectly fine, I'd incorporate drop sets for the last few sets when reps get lower.
I've been on a bro split since I started 7 years ago. If you're responding well to it, no need to change.

[–]1tino1254 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Supplements are maybe 3% of your results. Diet is 80%. Lifting is incredibly important, but you can't get lean without a caloric deficit.

That said, some training supplements with actual science behind them include caffeine, creatine, ALCAR, citrulline malate and beta alanine.

Push/pull/legs is fine as long as you're hitting the major compound lifts in each workout. Should structure workouts around presses/deadlifts/squats, respectively.

Diet wise, just get 1.6g of protein per kg of bodyweight, anything over that hasn't been supported by science. Protein is still the 'best" macronutrient because of the thermic effect of food (25% of the calories are burned in its digestion) and its role in muscle repair, but many people have trouble getting to super high protein levels, and it's not as big of a concern as many make it out to be.

Beyond that, figure out your maintenance calories, go about -500 cals from that, and fill in your remaining macros with carbs and fat as you see fit. Try to get enough fat to ensure no impact on hormone levels (~60-80g), but beyond that, carbs provide energy and should be used to fill the remainder of your calories.

[–]LiftOrGTF07 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Diet wise, just get a gram of protein per kg of bodyweight, anything over that hasn't been supported by science.

Rofl.

[–]1tino1250 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Oops, I derped. It's 1.6, not 1.0. Fixing the original post.

https://bayesianbodybuilding.com/the-myth-of-1glb-optimal-protein-intake-for-bodybuilders/

[–]ReformSociety2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Science shows you don't need more than 0.6-0.8g protein/lb bodyweight.

[–]TSM_Bjergson0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Then do that and see how it works for you.

[–]ReformSociety0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Something doesn't sit right with me when you give advice that works for you (on steroids) but not for non-steroid users.

[–]BasketCase5590 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Have you read Bigger Leaner Stronger by Michael Matthews? If so, what did you think?

[–]TSM_Bjergson0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I haven't

[–]sumethreuaweiei0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy Link

Do you have any advice for someone with Degree 1-2 AC shoulder separation and early stage osteoarthritis?

A drunk acquaintance dropped me on my shoulder and I’m incredibly pissed that my shoulder is fucked.

[–]TSM_Bjergson0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy Link

Only thing I can suggest is physio and to look into BPC 157

[–]sumethreuaweiei0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

Looks like BPC157 is only useful by injection because oral absorption isn’t any good

[–]TSM_Bjergson0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

Yup. Subq as close to the damaged area as you can get. Fixed my carpel tunnel and tennis elbow.

[–]sumethreuaweiei0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Goddamn. I’m 21, the last injections I got were vaccines as a child.

[–]moltenw0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

TSM_Bjergson

KDA player btw /s

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Almost all of what you said is broscience. And you didn't even give him the most basic, fundamental advice of progressive overload.

8-12 is fine, but telling a guy that his main focus should be 8-12 is retarded because his recovery will be longer because I'm also assuming you'd have the guy do ridiculous volume on like 7 different exercises in one session.

Keeping carbs mostly around pre and post workout literally has no effect on fat gain and also, protein doesn't need to be that high. You're only hurting your wallet.

The only thing you said that has any merit is the supplement bit and even then, just get a multivitamin and use creatine, that's it. Maybe some shakes if you're having trouble getting protein into your diet or you just like the shakes.

His aesthetics will be shitter than if he jumped on a compound focused program and focused on strength which is what works best for naturals. But I guess since you're a competitive bodybuilder, you're on gear so you can train however you like.

Protip bois, don't take training advice from competitive bodybuilders if you're natural.

[–]TSM_Bjergson0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

8-12 is fine, but telling a guy that his main focus should be 8-12 is retarded because his recovery will be longer because I'm also assuming you'd have the guy do ridiculous volume on like 7 different exercises in one session.

Lifting heavy is more strenuous on your CNS than hypertrophy training.

Keeping carbs mostly around pre and post workout literally has no effect on fat gain and also, protein doesn't need to be that high. You're only hurting your wallet.

Nutrient timing is a thing. Look into insulin sensitivity.

The only thing you said that has any merit is the supplement bit and even then, just get a multivitamin and use creatine, that's it. Maybe some shakes if you're having trouble getting protein into your diet or you just like the shakes.

So you're saying that essential fatty acids in Omega 3's are not essential? I doubt he's eating wild caught salmon regularly.

His aesthetics will be shitter than if he jumped on a compound focused program and focused on strength which is what works best for naturals. But I guess since you're a competitive bodybuilder, you're on gear so you can train however you like.

Was using the same training split for the 5 years I spent training naturally and it worked just fine for me.

Protip bois, don't take training advice from competitive bodybuilders if you're natural.

Natural or enhanced, training and nutironal fundamentals dont change.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lmao alright bro.

Follow this guy's advice guys. You'll come into the gym month after month, year after year looking pretty much the same.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

If you are 6' 185 and 13% body fat then why do you need advice on diet?

[–]CeremonyTree[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I eat like shit lol. I don't eat a lot of processed foods, but most days I'm most likely either missing or going way over calories/protein.

[–]harsheehorshee2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Or she could be thinking that it's what he is suspecting?

[–]TheStumblingWolf0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

It's like preemptively saying "I didn't take the cookie" before anyone has even looked in the jar lol

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Now go lift and fuck new pussy, life is good brother

hooah

[–]Chad173859 points60 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Manipulation 101. Her mother knows you, she had a dream about you, the weekend was sooo good, shed never cheat on you. Jeez. This is the material betas/cucks love to hear. Glad askTRP could help you in your troubles and Good for you OP. Now go enjoy your life.

[–]CeremonyTree[S] 15 points16 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Not only that! She brought up that she told me she loved me before I'd left!

Thanks, bro. It is extremely eye-opening that this girl is so willing to manipulate me.

[–]stephcurryftw51 points52 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Anyone who tells you randomly they won't cheat on you has cheated, is cheating, or is thinking about cheating.

[–]CeremonyTree[S] 13 points14 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I agree. Trying to protect her reputation.

[–]willowhawk11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Like the inverse of when a girl says we're not going to have sex without any promting from you.

Show it's already on her mind

[–]harsheehorshee2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Why can't it be that she wants to make sure op isn't breaking up bc of some misconceived notion that she's cheating? Gotta leave no stone unturned namsain

[–][deleted] 22 points23 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

well done

[–]CeremonyTree[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thanks bro

[–]TheTrenTrannyTrain22 points23 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

OP, you've never brought up to her that you think she's cheating on you? If not I'd have to agree with others, her brought it up unprompted definitely shows that she's either cheated on you already, or thinking about it.

Freudian slip.

[–]CeremonyTree[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Not explicitly, I found out she'd been DMing some dude before, so I went back to plate with her a few months ago; telling her that maybe we can work back to a relationship. This is what I get.

[–]zboo1h16 points17 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

  1. She definitely cheated.

  2. That doesn't matter.

  3. Get back to making your life and the lives of those you care about better.

[–]CeremonyTree[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thanks, bro.

[–]Store_Front_Door14 points15 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I'm proud that you managed to hold frame and follow through with your initial plan. Good job.

[–]CeremonyTree[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thanks, bro.

[–]wellsking8 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Her not picking up the initial phone call just goes to show the amount of respect she had for you. You didn't make the easy choice you made the right choice, understand the road in front of you and enjoy the journey. Cheers

[–]CeremonyTree[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Well I never called her initially. Only told her to call. Thanks bro!

[–]cptgoatsack6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Definitely made the right call there. Girls mostly aren't very good liars if you know what you're looking for.

[–]CeremonyTree[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I didn't but I think I've seen it first hand now.

[–]KingRead7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Whoever she cheated on you with will be her next boyfriend. Almost guaranteed. Don't take it personally, you learned a good lesson.

[–]CeremonyTree[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Fuck man, these comments are depressing. I agree. Thanks.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

She cheated, bro.

Good call.

[–]CeremonyTree[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thanks

[–]TheIcePill8 points9 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

If you decided to end things why are you still talking to her? Ghost her.

[–]CeremonyTree[S] 2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I probably could have. However, I wanted to make sure that I wouldn't have a weak moment where I message her while it's still up in the air.

[–]TheIcePill4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

You are entering to her frame and already growing weaker by listening to her explanations. Call it off and Ghost her immediately.

[–]CeremonyTree[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I have bro & I agree. There will be no more contact.

[–]abudun792 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Really good, man! Finally someone who manages to put good advise to work. GREAT JOB!

[–]CeremonyTree[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I appreciate it. Needed the advice from you guys.

[–]Work_In_Progress922 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It's good that you took the advice given to you and applied it. Delete this girl from your phone and remove her on all your social media if you haven't yet.

[–]IVIaskerade1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yep, well handled.

[–]DaveyOneBite0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Impressed.

Get ready for her Hamster to rewrite your entire relationship history and try to convince you how perfect everything was, how much she loved you, how she will do anything for you, etc.

Don’t fall for it. If you let things drag on like most guys would her Hamster would still have rewritten the history only in this Hamster-verse she never loved you she never felt the spark she really wanted things to work out but she just can’t lie to herself and lead you on anymore.

You did good.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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