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Won’t She Have Sex with Other Guys?

BlackDragon
February 10, 2020

Whenever the discussion of monogamy not working and non-monogamy being a less-bad option is had, many men bring up all kinds of excuses as to why they would ânever doâ non-monogamy. They will usually blurt out some knee-jerk excuses without really thinking them through, like what their mothers will think, how they might get an STD, and so on. 

I listed every excuse and objection to non-monogamy that anyone could possibly come up with along with their answers in this article here, and I strongly suggest you read that article if you have concerns about non-monogamy. I also wrote a separate article addressing the concerns men have about OLTR Marriage and open marriages here. 

Butâ¦Â 

Rarely are these concerns what men are really concerned about. Usually these weak objections are smokescreens for the real concern men have about this. Often these men donât want to actually verbalize this concern because they donât want to look weak, or needy, or like a beta, or like they have oneitis. So instead they toss out a bullshit irrational or philosophical objection about âWhat if everyone did that?â or how sex really isnât that important or some other nonsense. 

But you and I know what the real concern is, donât we? Itâs simply that this guy couldnât emotionally handle it if the woman he was dating, or his girlfriend, or his wife actually ended up having sex with another guy. 

Iâve addressed this concern many times and in many ways over the years, but Iâve never devoted an article to it specifically.  This is that article. This is the official and comprehensive answer to the concern of âOMG she might fuck another guy oh nooooooo!!!!â 

Here we go…

1. Not all women will automatically have sex with other men just because they are in a non-monogamous relationship.

As I discussed in great detail in The Unchained Man, women follow a completely different sexual pattern than men. Most men stupidly think that women view sex just like men. In other words, that women are horny as hell 24/7, thinking about sex all the time, and will leap at the chance to fuck other men as soon as theyâre given permission to do so. 

No. Thatâs how we men view sex. But women donât. While there are some women like this (Iâll address them in a minute), most women are not. Instead, women go through phases in their lives where they are very horny, and other times where they barely want sex at all.  

I have vast experience having many multi-year-long non-monogamous relationships. In addition, over the past ten years Iâve communicated with thousands of men who have as well. From all of this data I can tell you for a fact that approximately 10% of women in FB relationships and 50% of women in MLTR or OLTR relationships will not have sex with other men even if youâre having sex with other women. They donât want to. Either theyâre going through a phase where they arenât interested, or their ASD is very high, or theyâre older, or for various other reasons known only to the female psyche.  

Granted, this does leave 90% of women in FB relationships and a remaining 50% of women in MLTR or OLTR relationships who may have sex with other men at certain times in the relationship (though not consistently). Iâll address those in a minute. 

The point here is that just because you would love to have sex with other women all the time does not mean that the woman youâre dating would love to have sex with other men all the time.

Dude. Youâre projecting. Women are not men. Their behavior patterns are very different. 

2. Older women are far less likely to have sex with other men.

I have said repeatedly that men should not have a girlfriend (monogamous or non-monogamous doesnât matter) until heâs 30 years old, shouldnât move in with a woman (legally married or not doesnât matter) until heâs at least 35 years old, and shouldnât have any kids until heâs around 40 years old and has accomplished most of his financial/career goals.  

I have also said that no man of any age should get into a really serious relationship with long-term expectations with any woman under the age of about 25. Less serious relationships with women under 25 are perfectly fine; I have several FBs who are well under this age. But a serious relationship with long-term expectations with women these young is usually a recipe for disaster. Read this for more details. 

This means that if you do this correctly and arenât stupid, the few women youâll have in your life who are very serious (serious, long-term girlfriends or wives) are going to be a little older. 

As Iâve talked about in great detail, the older a woman gets, the more her ASD grows. This is a real problem when you want to have sex with her on the first or second date, but when it comes to having sex with other men in a non-monogamous relationship, this ASD actually helps you, since because of that very same ASD, she is far less likely to actually have sex with other men outside of you.

Because of her ever-growing ASD, sheâll likely consider things like that as immature, gross, and/or inappropriate for her to do. Sheâll tolerate you doing it because youâre a man, and as all high-ASD over-33 women know, men are immature barbarians. So, if you do it sheâll roll her eyes and accept it (provided you’re managing the relationship correctly of course), but she has no interest in doing the same. 

Iâll give you just one simple example. Iâm in an OLTR Marriage that is sexually open. Both me and my wife Pink Firefly are allowed to have sex with other people. Of course, I regularly have sex with my FBs on a weekly basis. However, Pink Firefly is a quiet, reserved, ASD-filled, decently high-Disney, practicing Christian (meaning she actually goes to church and shit) and full-time preschool teacher in her forties. Do you really think she has any desire whatsoever to hit up Tinder or her local bar to go bang dudes? Do you really think she would enjoy that kind of thing? Do you think she would consider any of that appropriate for her?  

The answer is no. And that is typical for women her age.  

Youâre going to spend most of your life well beyond age 35. This means that any serious women in your life are likely also going to be that age or older, at least for most of your life (again, unless youâre ridiculously stupid and marry a 19year-old). The odds are overwhelming that these women are not going to have any interest in banging other guys just because youâre doing the same with other women, and most other Alpha Male 2.0s will report exactly this. (It’s it a 100% guarantee? No. There are no 100% guarantees in life. But the odds are overwhelmingly in your favor, particularity if you take my relationship advice and manage the relationship correctly.)

3. Young, hot girls are going to have sex with other men, but you shouldnât be in serious relationships with these women in the first place, so you shouldnât give a shit.

Older women probably wonât have sex with other men in non-monogamous relationships. However, it is certainly true that if youâre seeing a much younger woman (under the age of 25 or so) she will probably hook up with other guys and do so with glee. Double this if sheâs really good looking, and double that again if sheâs very extroverted and/or has a large social circle. 

Yes, most of the hot younger women Iâve been with, both now and in the past, were indeed having sex with other guys, and sometimes even other girls. Many of them, perhaps even most of them had full-on boyfriends they were cheating on by being with me. (Monogamy doesn’t work, guys! Get it through your fuckin’ heads!)

But once again, you shouldnât be in serious relationships with women like this in the first place. FBs or lower-end MLTRs with women like this are perfectly fine. Wonderful, in fact. But if youâre 34 years old and are shocked that your smokinâ hot 19year-old FB fucks some random guy at a party, you shouldnât be surprised.

More importantly, you shouldnât care. And if you do care, if you really, really, really care deeply about what a frigginâ 19year-old teenager youâre banging is doing in her spare time, then my friend, you have some serious neediness issues you need to work through. Itâs not about non-monogamy or women having sex with other men at this point; itâs about you and your neediness issues. 

By the way, if youâre dumb enough to get into a committed, monogamous relationship with a young, cute girl, guess what? SHEâLL FUCK OTHER GUYS BEHIND YOUR BACK ANYWAY. I have said numerous times that women under the age of about 23 are functionally incapable of sexual monogamy even if they promise it. Do you realize how many women this age I was having sex with who had boyfriends they were cheating on? Havenât I said many times that one of the dumbest thingsâ men do is get into monogamous relationships with young girls and then expect them to never cheat? 

Sexual monogamy is not in the cards for young, hot women no matter what kind of relationship you have with them. Accept it, or never have sex with any women this young.

4. Even, if in the worst case scenario it actually happens, you get used to it very quickly. The only reason itâs a big deal to you is because it hasnât happened to you yet.

Letâs take the worst case scenario and say that youâre a super jealous guy who tries non-monogamy but you go out of your way to screen for a woman who is less likely to have sex with other men (screening is a huge mistake in my opinion, but letâs go with it). One day you discover that sheâs had sex with another guy. 

Are you going to feel jealous? Yes. Are you going to be upset? Probably. Will that be a happy day for you? No. Youâll probably even go all Alpha Male 1.0 and start a bunch of drama with her that will cause her to leave you. (Then youâll whine and cry on my blogs like a little bitch and ask about how to get her back.) 

Letâs say a few weeks later it happens again, maybe with the same woman or maybe with a new woman (because the first woman dumped you when you bitched at her about it).  

Are you going to feel uncomfortable again? Yes. However, you notice that the discomfort isnât quite as bad as the first time. Oh, itâs still bad, just not as bad.  

But since youâre intelligent and rational enough to know that monogamy doesnât work at all, you stick with it and keep going with it. And it happens a third time, then a fourth time, again, either with the same woman or some new woman youâre dating. 

By the fifth time, something weird happens. As soon as you find out, you just sort of shrug. You donât really care, and you just get back to what you were doing. Then you stop and catch yourself and realize how weird it is that you barely care right now when the first time it happened just a few weeks ago you were ready to kill someone.  

Wow. What a difference. Itâs like night and day.  

Thatâs exactly how this works most of the time. Most guys quickly stop giving a shit about this stuff, particularly in less serious FB and MLTR relationships (which is what you should start with if you’re new to this world). Thatâs what will probably happen to you as well, if you just stop being a terrified little bitch and give it a chance. 

All of the above points were minor sub-points. Iâve actually been leading up to THE point, THE answer to the âBut I canât handle it if she fucks another guyâ concern.

Ready?

Here it is:

5. THE ONLY ALTERNATIVE TO NON-MONOGAMY DOESNâT FUCKING WORK YOU IDIOT!

Whenever any guy says or implies that he wonât do any sort of non-monogamy because he just canât handle his women possibly having sex with other men, the unspoken but implied second half of that statement is that heâll just stick with monogamy and somehow heâll make that work. 

But he wonât. Because he canât. Because monogamy doesnât work. 

As Iâve analyzed in great detail at this blog and in my books over the past ten years, with mountains of science, stats, history, and psychology, human beings, men and women both, hate sexual monogamy, particularly past a time frame of about 6-24 months.  

Long-term sexual monogamy, or Disney monogamy, doesnât work at all. Youâll either get divorced or one of you will cheat. Marriage is fine (Iâm married myself), having kids is fine (have two myself), but being sexually monogamous to just one person for the rest of your life wonât fucking work and you know it. 

Serial monogamy is an inconsistent lifestyle of forever ups and downs. Sometimes youâll be happy and just as often youâll be miserable during your frequent arguments and breakups. This kind of lifestyle might be okay for a few years in your twenties or early thirties, but going through frequent breakups and looking around for a new girlfriend every two years is not going to make you happy in your forties, fifties, or beyond. (I already addressed all the points of pro-serial monogamy people here and here.) 

And donât even try to come up with a âyou can fuck other women all you want but she canât ever fuck other menâ scenario. That wonât work long-term in the Western world; Read this.

So, if you never want to do any sort of non-monogamy because you just canât handle the woman perhaps having sex with another man, great. I want your specific plan for exactly what youâre going to do over the next 40 years of your life to maintain long-term happiness in your relationship life with women. If you canât articulate this in very specific terms, then youâve just proved my entire point. Monogamy doesnât work in the long-term, you know it doesnât work, but you donât want to try any other system, so youâre going to just stick with a system you know doesnât work. 

Not smart. 

Assuming you want women in your life, youâve got two choices: 

  1. Stick with a system that is guaranteed to not work for you in the long run (monogamy).

or 

  1. Use the alternative (non-monogamy, there are 14 different kinds) that might, maybe make you emotionally uncomfortable for a little while until you get used to it and wonât be nearly as bad as you now fantasize.

The choice is yours.  

Choose wisely. 

TheRedArchive is an archive of Red Pill content, including various subreddits and blogs. This post has been archived from the blog Caleb Jones.

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Post Information
Title Won’t She Have Sex with Other Guys?
Author BlackDragon
Date February 10, 2020 1:00 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Blog Caleb Jones
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/blog/Caleb-Jones/wonat-she-have-sex-with-other-guys.22772
https://theredarchive.com/blog/22772
Original Link https://blackdragonblog.com/2020/02/10/wont-she-have-sex-with-other-guys/
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