You are probably familiar with my new method for escalating a girl on Facebook. The idea is to have a basic routine / set of principles to drop onto a girl once she’s on chat and the usual get-her-on-a-date progression isn’t working. You have to be prepared to burn the set to run this, so only use it when you don’t care. This girl I hadn’t seen in 8 months. We’d had an instant date, a Day 2, and she refused the kiss close. Then just very infrequent facebook chats that went nowhere. So I think fuck it, drop The Stack. So it begins…. [these are full unedited chats]
My Italian and Spanish flags together
Her: i’m bored
Me: masturbate
Her: ¬¬   is what u do when u are bored?
Me: depends if I have a new video game
Her: haha
Me: lock your door   put some music on   pull your skirt up   and rub one out   you’ll be fine
Her: …
Me: then make a coffee
Her: hahaha   i dnt have coffee
Me: but the rest is fine   I know
Her: hah   ok…i’ll do that then
Me: ð Â Â send me a photo
Her: no   i’ll send u a video
Me: good girl
Two days later she reopens me and now this is the first of three chats before she came over to my house to fuck. Burto has her now. Poor girl.
Her: bored again
Me: well, you know what to do
Her: i’m at work
Me: obviously they aren’t working you very hard….. Â Â what’s your uniform look like?
Her: ts nice   jaquet, hirt, skirt   we look like air hostess
Me: smart?
Her: yes
Me: is it the type of uniform people have fantasies about fucking in?
Her: maybe
Me: not me, obviously   I’m not a sexual pervert
Her: no…
Me: But you are
Her: i’m not
Me: yes you are
Her: no   no   you are
Me: I never think about fucking girls in sexy uniforms
Her: yes…sure…
Me: you pervert
Her: you are
Me: you are a bigger pervert
Her: no
Me: I’m going out now. enjoy your evening! Â Â pervert
Her: i’m not   u pervert me
Me: you like it
Her: no   i need a new house in may   do u now any place available?   and dnt tell me your room
Me: my garage
Her: haha   i dnt want to live wth u   u’ll pervert me
Me: I will   alot
Her: i know
Me: You probably can’t handle it   too much sex   for you
Her: hahah   dnt make me laugh
Me: Spanish girls are not good at sex
Her: did u try?
Me: yes   quite disappointing   even though she was beautiful
Her: but i’m catalan   much better
Me: Haha, catalans are the WORST Â Â !!!
Her: no   we are the best   we are more frustrated   thats why we are better in sex
Me: so you are all screamers and biters, then?
Her: at least
Me: I’m totally not impressed
Her: ok   i dnt care   haha   u are jealous
Me: I like you [her name], and   if you jumped into my bed to show me    I’d fuck you   but   BUT   I’m a lazy man, and I think Spanish girls are not worth leaving my house for
Her: haahhahha   crazy man   haha
Me: I’ve got a Rey Leon tattoo on my ass [a reference to something on her facebook wall] Â Â Come here and you can lick it
Her: whaat   ahha
Me: sorry, I mean LOOK at it
Her: why u decided to do that tattoo   xD   one day…
Me: If you were in my room   your knickers would hit the floor within one minute   I’d throw you on my bed   bite your neck   spank your little girly ass   then send you to make me a cup of tea
Her: hahaha   i’m not gonna make u tea
Me: ok, I’m gonna fuck you then   actually
Her: haha
Me: MISTAKE   I’m NOT gonna fuck you then   you can’t expect me to give you great sex
without making me tea   and cake
Her: hahaha
Me: so you expect great sex for free?
Her: i dnt do tea
Me: is this a catalan thing?
Her: maybe i make u tea and sex is rubbish
Me: hmmmmmm, I see your point
Her: u see it?
Me: maybe it should be written as a contract
Her: hahahha
Me: If the tea is bad, I am free of my obligation to fuck you   If the tea is good, and I fuck you and you don’t like it   (unlikely as that may be)   then to make up for the bad sex
Her: …
Me: I’ll let you suck my cock
Her: hahaha   i dnt like this contract
Me: what’s your terms? I can’t guarantee I’ll accept them
Her: i dnt want to make tea
Me: I like coffee as much as I like tea
Her: hahaha
Me: maybe I’ll even share the coffee with you
Her: i dnt want to make coffee neither   in that case the tea is easier
Me: Ok, it’s a deal
Her: haha   ok… i need to go to sleep   i’m working at 7 tomo
Me: get in a taxi now, I’ll pay half
Her: i’m working tomorrowww
Me: go to work with a smile on your face   get a taxi now
Her: haahha   i go to sleep   maybe on sunday   if barcelona wins this weekend
Me: so that’s 12% chance for you
Her: no   barcelona will win
Me: No   get in a taxi now   then, on sunday   you won’t care about the football   you’ll be bragging to all your friends about the great sex you had
Her: hahahhaa   good night
Me: ð Â Â sleep well
