Here are 5 of the most common reasons why a woman will develop a âGrass is Greener Syndromeâ and then leave her man:
1. She didnât feel attracted to him in the way she secretly wanted to
At the beginning of a relationship everything always seems perfect (i.e. the spark of attraction is strong).
The woman might even begin thinking things like, âI think he could be the one. He just seems to know how to make me feel happy when Iâm sad, calm me down when Iâm angry and generally make me feel good when Iâm around him. I love how it feels to be in his arms. Iâm just so happy and nothing is going to change that.â
Unfortunately though, over time, she may begin to notice that even though her guy is a good guy in many ways, he just canât seem to make her feel attracted in the ways that she really wants.
For example: Heâs nice and sweet and gentle with her and treats her like sheâs precious.
However, what she secretly wants is for him to be a bit more of a challenge so she feels as though she needs to put in some effort to impress him too, rather than feeling like she can say and do anything (e.g. throw tantrums over nothing, blame him for how sheâs feeling, disrespect him) and he will always let her get away with it.
Alternatively, he treats her like sheâs his best friend and one of his buddies (e.g. he likes to hang out and play video games with her or watch football/baseball games on TV, go to the park and kick a ball around, spends most weekends fixing his car and expects her to stick around and get her hands dirty with him).
Yet, what she really wants is for him to make her feel like a sexy, desirable woman.
She wants to feel attractive and like he canât wait to get her naked and in bed with him, rather than greasy and under the hood of a car, or sweaty and working out in the yard.
Another example is when a guy thinks that in order to make his woman happy, he needs to take a back seat and let her call all the shots and make all the decisions in the relationship.
Unfortunately though, she hated being the more dominant one in the relationship, because it stopped her from being able to relax into thinking, acting and behaving like a feminine woman.
Instead, she has to wear the pants and be âthe manâ for the both of them.
Naturally, this causes her to lose respect for him.
She may then begin to think things like, âWhy am I putting up with this? I donât want to be with a guy who canât make me feel the way I want to feel when Iâm with him, even if he is a good guy. Right now, all I feel is angry and resentful towards him, because I feel as though Iâm compromising on my wants and desires just to stick with him. I donât want that anymore. I deserve better and so does he. I donât think this is working out after all.â
Then, while thinking and feeling this way, she may find herself interacting with another guy who begins to spark her feelings in the ways that she feels have been lacking in her relationship with her guy (e.g. heâs more challenging, emotionally masculine, makes her feel feminine and girly in his presence).
This naturally causes her to begin thinking that the grass is greener on the other side.
She may then decide to break up with her guy to explore her feelings for the new man.
Yet, hereâs the thingâ¦
Even though a woman might initially be drawn to another guy because heâs giving her the kind of attraction experience that she felt was missing in her relationship, it doesnât mean heâs perfect or wonât turn her off in other ways (e.g. heâs more emotionally masculine, but he is lazy and has no purpose in life, he makes her feel sexy and desirable, but heâs also got a wandering eye).
So, if your ex girlfriend is currently suffering form Grass is Greener Syndrome, donât let it get to you and cause you to give up on getting her back.
Instead, focus on understanding what was missing in your relationship with her, so that when you interact with her from now on, you can start making her feel attracted in the ways that are important to her.
The more drawn to you she feels in a way that feels good to her, the more respect and sexual attraction for you she will begin to feel again.
From there, reconnecting with her original feelings of love for you is something that happens naturally, because it feels like the right thing for her to do.
Then, dumping her new guy (if she hasnât done that already) and getting back with you will happen very quickly and easily.
Another reason why a woman will develop the so-called, âGrass is Greener Syndromeâ isâ¦
2. The guy was initially attractive and appealing to her, but he changed and became too neutral, soft or insecure
Sometimes, a woman gets into a relationship with a guy because he initially displays the kinds of behaviors and characteristics that are attractive to her.
For example: He mightâ¦
- Seem confident and self-assured, without being arrogant or overbearing.
- Treat her like a feminine girly woman when interacting with her, thereby making her feel attractive and desirable.
- Exude emotional masculinity and inner strength.
- Make her laugh and smile and feel good about herself in his presence.
However, after a while, she began to notice that some of the things that drew her to him in the first place were beginning to fade away.
For example: Rather than being the confident, emotionally strong man she fell in love with, he began to feel insecure about himself around her.
He started to ask things like, âYou wouldnât ever leave me would you?â or, âYou still love me, donât you?â
He also became jealous of her relationships with other men (e.g. the guys she talked to at university/work/her neighbors, her male friends, guys on social media) and as a result, became clingy and needy.
Alternatively, he went from being an emotionally masculine, passionate man, to behaving like a neutral friend or roommate with her (i.e. he stopped creating attraction between them so she felt more like his buddy than his girl).
Another example is where a guy stopped being emotionally strong and suddenly became overly emotional like a woman or a girl (e.g. when they had an argument or disagreement he would cry or sulk, he would whine to his woman about every little problem or issue in his life, rather than deal with it like a man).
As a result, she began to lose respect for him as a man.
When that happened, she noticed that her feelings of attraction for him began to fade away as well.
This made other guys seem so much more attractive to her.
She then began to think things like, âI really misjudged him. I thought he was so confident and emotionally strong and I felt that we had something special going, but it turns out heâs nothing like I imagined him to be. Heâs just insecure and needy and a wuss and I no longer want to be stuck in a relationship with him. Iâm sure I can do so much better for myself than this.â
This led to her breaking up with him and finding herself a new guy who really is what he appears to be (e.g. confident, charismatic, emotionally strong and masculine).
If this sounds like something that might have caused your ex girlfriend to develop Grass is Greener Syndrome, then donât worry about it.
You can still change how she feels and get her back.
All it takes is a new approach to attraction.
When you make her feel a renewed sense of respect and attraction for the man you are now (e.g. by making her laugh and smile and feel good during interactions, showing her via your actions, behavior and conversation style that youâve leveled up as a man, making her feel feminine and girly in contrast to your masculine vibe), she wonât be able to stop herself from feeling drawn to you again.
When that happens, her walls come down and she becomes confused about her feelings for the other guy.
Then all it takes if for you to fully switch her sexual and romantic feelings for you back on and get her back.
Another reason why a woman will develop the so-called, âGrass is Greener Syndromeâ isâ¦
3. The relationship dynamic was boring and predictable
For a relationship to last, the dynamic between the man and the woman needs to be in balance.
Essentially, what that means is that the guy is a good guy, who also makes his woman feel excited to be around him, causing her to respond to that by being a loving, devoted, loyal woman to him.
However, if the guy canât maintain that dynamic, his woman will begin to lose too much respect and attraction for him and she may then begin to feel that the grass is greener elsewhere.
Unfortunately, a lot of guys donât understand relationship dynamics, so they make the mistake of thinking that doing whatever their woman wants is what will keep her happy and want to stay with him.
However, some guys tend to go overboard with that (usually because they donât really understand how a womanâs attraction to a man works) and as a result, turn their woman off instead.
For example: A guy like that mightâ¦
Shower her with attention, gifts and other displays of his affection.
Always be nice and sweet to his girl, regardless of how she behaves or the way she treats him (e.g. she disrespects him, is closed off towards him, isnât supportive of his dreams in life even though he always encourages her to achieve her biggest goals, she lies to him).
Take a back seat and allow her to make most or all the decisions for the both of them (e.g. she decides when, where and with whom they will go out, chooses the restaurant or movie, tells him when he can and cannot see his friends).
Always agrees with her regardless of how unreasonable sheâs being because heâs afraid she might dump him if he stands up to her.
In his mind, heâs being the perfect boyfriend.
Yet, what he doesnât realize is that even though his woman might appreciate that heâs a good guy to her, being able to say and do anything and get away with it is actually pretty boring to her.
As a result, she doesnât feel motivated to be a good woman back to him in return and instead ends up taking him for granted.
In other words, sheâs the sort of woman who wants a guy who is more of a challenge, so she feels like she has to do her best to keep him happy and interested in her, rather than feeling as though she doesnât have to put in any effort in the relationship because he will accept anything she throws at him as long as he can be with her.
Of course, if he canât offer her the challenge she secretly wants in her relationship with him, she might mentally begin to compare him to other men (e.g. guys at work or university that have shown interest in her in the past).
If she then also happens to interact with a guy who gives her the feelings that sheâs craving (i.e. heâs more of a challenge so she feels exited and turned on), she may then decide to dump her guy for the new man.
So, if something like that has happened to you, to get your ex girlfriend back, you need to focus on approaching her in a completely new way that is going to be more attractive and appealing to her.
This new way involves you creating a relationship dynamic where youâre good to her and treat her with love and respect, but you also make her feel motivated to be good to you, treat you well, be loyal to you and make you feel loved and appreciated.
When she begins to realize that the grass is not greener on the other side (i.e. because most guys donât really know how to maintain a balanced relationship dynamic), she will start to feel that losing you will be something she will end up regretting.
As a result, she will naturally open back up to being your girl again, or at least hooking up with you sexually to see how she feels afterwards.
Another reason why a woman will develop the so-called, âGrass is Greener Syndromeâ isâ¦
4. The guy made her feel as though she was more valuable than him
In some cases, a guy will get into a relationship with a woman who is a lot more beautiful, engaging, funny and smart than any other woman he has ever dated.
As a result, he may begin thinking things like, âSheâs so amazing. I canât believe how lucky I am that a woman like her would even consider being with a guy like me. I just hope that I will be enough for her and that she doesnât realize that she can do so much better than me.â
He might then treat her like gold, do whatever she wants without argument regardless of how unreasonable sheâs being, allow her to treat him badly or disrespect him and generally fawn over her.
This naturally makes the woman feel as though sheâs more valuable than him and she may begin to think things like, âWhy am I sticking with him? Iâm sure I can do so much better for myself. Heâs just so wimpy and insecure. I need a real man who can make me feel like a real woman, not an insecure guy who doesnât believe in himself and who lets me push him around and disrespect him so easily.â
If she then also happens to interact with other guys who come across as being more of a challenge to her than her guy (i.e. they make her feel that she needs to put in the effort to impress them, otherwise they will lose interest in her vs. her guy who will accept whatever she dishes out to him without ever standing up to her), she will quickly begin to lose interest in him.
She may then decide that the grass is definitely greener on the other side and break up with him.
Of course, being dumped by his woman only reinforces to him what he believed all along (i.e. that sheâs out of his league).
Yet, thatâs not really true.
He is good enough for her, but his approach to attraction gave her the impression that she was too good for him and that he was lucky to be with her, which gave her a false sense of superiority over him.
In other words, she could have stayed with him for life, but he made her feel like she was trading down by being with him (even though she wasnât), so she decided to leave him and find herself another man who felt he deserved to be with her.
This is why, if you want to get your ex back, you have to get to the point where you believe in yourself and your value to her.
You can then sincerely project the kind of confidence that will re-attract her and make her want to be your girl again.
Then interact with her, reawaken her sexual and romantic feelings for you and get her back.
You can do it, but you have to believe that you can.
If you donât truly believe in yourself and feel as though your ex will be the lucky one to have a great guy like you in her life, the grass will continue to seem greener elsewhere and you will struggle to get her back.
Another reason why a woman will develop the so-called, âGrass is Greener Syndromeâ isâ¦
5. She was too mature for him
Sometimes a guy matures faster than his woman and sometimes a woman matures faster than her man.
However, if a woman does grow up before her guy does, it can lead to her feeling as though the relationship no longer suits her.
For example: She might notice thatâ¦
- She doesnât want to party as much as she did before and instead prefers to focus on her studies or career. However, her guy is still stuck partying, hanging out with his friends, being irresponsible and not being able to hold down a steady job.
- She is more serious about the relationship and sees herself settling down and potentially having a family together. On the other hand, heâs content to just drift along as boyfriend and girlfriend without a purpose or direction.
- She has big dreams and goals that sheâs working towards achieving in her life, while he has made her his purpose in life and just follows what she does.
- Her friends and family are moving on to new levels in their relationships, while she is stuck at the same level with her guy, without any hope that things will change.
As a result, she may begin feeling dissatisfied in her relationship with her guy.
She might then begin looking to find herself someone else who is in sync with her way of thinking, talking and behaving.
So, if your ex broke up with you because she felt that you and her were at different stages in life (i.e. she was more mature than you) donât worry about it.
When you change your approach to attraction she will quickly be able to see for herself that youâve leveled up as a man.
Then, as long as you use interactions with her to make her feel sparks of sexual and romantic attraction for you, her feelings will naturally begin to change.
She will start to realize that you really are the guy for her after all.
When that happens, her defenses come down and she opens back up to hanging out with you more and more to see where things go from there.
3 Mistakes You Should Avoid if You Want to Re-attract an Ex Girlfriend Who is Affected By Grass is Greener Syndrome
Regardless of whether your ex left you for greener pastures (i.e. another guy) or not, you can get her back if you want to.
It all depends on the approach you use from now on.
When you reactivate her feelings for you, she will see for herself that you really are the right guy for her after all and want you back.
However, if you turn her off, she will feel that sheâs better off without you.
So make sure you donât make any of the following mistakes:
1. Assuming that she has psychological problems and needs help, when itâs mostly just about a lack of attraction
Sometimes a guy doesnât want to admit that he may be partly to blame for the break up with his ex (i.e. he didnât give her the attraction experience she wanted so she left him), or he simply doesn’t understand how important attraction is to romantic love between a man and a woman.
As a result, he might justify what happened by accusing her of being mentally messed up.
He may even think to himself, âSheâs got issues, thatâs why she broke up with me. She needs to get help. Then, she will realize that she made a mistake and that the grass isnât greener somewhere else and she will come back to me.â
Yet, hereâs the thingâ¦
Just because a woman leaves a guy because of âGrass is Greener Syndromeâ it doesnât mean she has psychological problems.
Instead, in most cases, it simply means that her guy wasnât making her feel the way she wanted to feel in the relationship with him (i.e. attracted, in love, excited to be around him, happy).
So, donât make that mistake with your ex.
If you want her back, get her back by re-attracting her, rather than making excuses for her and blaming everything on her state of mind.
The more respect and attraction you make her feel for you again, the more interested she will be in the idea of getting back together again.
So focus on that.
Another mistake to avoid isâ¦
2. Getting into long discussions with her in an attempt to fix her
If you insist on having long, drawn out discussions with your ex about why she did this to you and then try to âfixâ her as though she is somehow broken, you may end up losing her for real.
Hereâs the thingâ¦
A woman doesnât want to be made to feel like she canât choose what she wants, even if that means breaking up with her guy to explore other options.
So, if you want to get your ex back, donât try to do it by discussing what you think is wrong with her, because sheâs almost certainly not going to listen to you.
She may even dig in her heels and refuse to interact with you, rather than deal with you always trying to fix her.
So, what should you do instead?
Focus on interacting with her and using humor and flirting to reawaken her sexual and romantic feelings for you and make her realize, on her own, that losing you is something she doesnât want to do.
When she gets to that point by herself, everything changes naturally and easily.
She wants to get back with you again because it feels good to her, not because she was forced into it by being made to believe that she has a problem.
Another mistake to avoid isâ¦
3. Not understanding the very subtle parts of your behavior and approach to the relationship that turn her off
When a woman leaves a guy because of âGrass is Greener Syndromeâ what he may not realize is that he contributed to her feelings of dissatisfaction in the relationship.
As a result, he doesnât change anything about himself (i.e. because he failed to understand what aspects of his thinking and behavior turned her off).
So, when he then interacts with his ex after the break up and she sees that heâs still the same and if she got back with him, the relationship dynamic would be what is was before, she sticks to her decision to move on.
Hereâs the thingâ¦
If you want to get your ex back, you need to be able to give her the attraction experience she really wants from you.
That means, you need to understand her subtle reasons for breaking up with you in the first place (e.g. you started off being confident and self-assured but ended up being needy and insecure, initially you made her feel sexy and desirable but over time you started making her feel like one of your buddies or a roommate).
Then, when you interact with her, she will be able to pick up (via your attitude, conversation style, actions and behavior) that you really have leveled up as a man.
That will automatically spark her feelings of respect and attraction for you.
Her guard then comes down and the idea of being your girl again starts to feel good to her.
