As the readership of this blog continues to grow, this blog has been hit in the last few weeks by a slew of comments from women who think that itâs somehow horrible and disgusting for a younger woman to voluntarily date an older man.
If you are one of these women, please help me out. I even included a pretty, female-friendly picture with this post. Please leave a comment below and answer the following question:
If a younger woman dates an older man in a serious or casual relationship, entirely of her own free will, and the man is not lying to her, not leading her on, looks perfectly normal, and is not a creeper, why is this bad?
I would love to hear your answer.
However, before you answer, let me address a few things that other women who are horrified about this have already said on this blog:
1. Itâs gross!
Thank you, but why is it gross? Please be specific, and remember that one of the rules here is that if you state an opinion, you must specifically explain why you have that opinion. Otherwise, youâre just bitching or trolling.
2. Older men are gross!
Hugh Jackman is in his mid 40s. Is he gross? Johnny Depp is in his 50s. Is he gross?
I know, I know, they’re celebrities. Doesnât matter. The question above clearly stated that the man was normal-looking. I agree with you that if a 19 year-old woman dates a 45 year-old man who is fat, hairy, wrinkly, and bald, then yeah, thatâs kinda gross. But Iâm not talking about that. Iâm talking about a normal, healthy-looking man.
3. Heâs deceiving her! Heâs taking advantage of her!
No, I stated that the man is honest, up-front, and not leading her on. I have told men millions of times to never lie to women and to treat them well. I agree that a woman dating a man (of any age) who is lying to her is bad, but thatâs not what weâre talking about here.
4. Sheâll regret it later in life!
Youâll need to back up that statement with facts because Iâve literally never seen this, and Iâve seen a lot. I donât date women younger than 23 these days, but I certainly have dated women younger than that over the course of my adult life. I am still friends with the vast majority of these women even though many of them are now much older. I can tell you for a fact that not one of them, and I mean this, not one of them âregretâ dating me. If anything they look back on the experience with fondness.
I also know plenty of women in their 30s and 40s who dated or hooked up with much older men when they (the women) were 18-25, and not once have I seen an older woman relate these stories with anything other than happy gleam in their eye. There is no âregret.â
I think youâre just saying âsheâll regret it laterâ because you just happen to think itâs gross. Again, youâll need to back up what youâre saying with facts instead of emotions.
5. The human brain isnât fully formed until people turn 25!
And? What does that have to do with anything? Iâm not telling older men to go around marrying 18 year-olds, and I actually berate men when theyâre stupid enough to get into serious relationships with long-term expectations with young women.
Instead, Iâm telling older men to feel free to date younger women in an honest and up-front way if those younger women happen to like older men, which many do.
By the way, when an over-30 woman you know dates a man under age 25, do you scream at her about how his brain isn’t fully formed? You and I both know you don’t.
6. Sheâs only dating him for the money! Thatâs the only reason why a younger woman would date an older guy!
I canât speak for other men, but I donât pay women to have sex with me, nor do I shower women with money. Read this and this for more details on how little I spend on women. So what youâre saying is an extremely inaccurate overgeneralization.
I agree there are some younger women gold diggers out there, and some creepy older guys who canât get laid unless they drop hundreds of dollars on women, but thatâs not the scenario Iâve had, and the same could be said about most of the older men who read this blog.
7. The only younger women gross enough or stupid enough to date older guys are damaged women with daddy issues!
If your contention is that 100% of younger women who date older men are mentally damaged, youâre wrong. Iâve dated a lot of younger women in my day, have known many other younger women who like older men, and have known lots of women who are now older who used to date older men when they were younger.
Most of these women are perfectly normal women who donât do drugs, have two married parents, and perfectly normal relationships with their fathers.
Are there some troubled younger women with daddy issues? You bet, of course there are. Do they represent 100% of younger women who date older guys? Nope.
8. Itâs just not right!
Why? Again, be specific about why you think that and back up your argument with something besides emotions and Societal Programming.
Allow me to repeat the question:
If a younger woman dates an older man in a serious or casual relationship, entirely of her own free will, and the man is not lying to her, not leading her on, looks perfectly normal, and is not a creeper, why is this bad?
Please leave a comment below with your answer, keeping in mind the above points I already mentioned.
